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Class of January 2017 Support Thread Part 5

Old 03-21-2017, 05:22 AM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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Thank you MrMc Tell,
I know the only way is to continue sober... it's just weird that now I feel more paranoid than when I was drinking... I'm a very inpatient person...I want everything now and done... then I go onto something else to chase and on and on....in a way....alcohol stopped that need. Very strange.
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Old 03-21-2017, 09:35 AM
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This is the longest I've been sober whilst on SR. Day 64. Very proud of myself and proud of you all persevering! It's ok to be proud of yourself! It's ok to have bad days. Hang on to your sobriety it'll be worth it!
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Old 03-21-2017, 09:41 AM
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Originally Posted by CuteNGayYay View Post
This is the longest I've been sober whilst on SR. Day 64. Very proud of myself and proud of you all persevering! It's ok to be proud of yourself! It's ok to have bad days. Hang on to your sobriety it'll be worth it!
Good man! Keep going! Every day is uncharted territory for me, and every day I find it harder and harder to believe that I let so many years slip by without admitting it was time to quit.

No looking back!
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Old 03-21-2017, 10:36 AM
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Good one CGY
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Old 03-21-2017, 12:10 PM
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Day 80

Hey everyone,
Beautiful day here today. I enjoyed a nice walk with the dog and feel great!

Site – So glad to see you here Congrats on your continued sobriety….I’m with you on the enjoyment of waking up without a hangover. Also, who knew REM sleep was so amazing!!!

bubita – Hang in there. Like MrMcTell said, it’s just a slump. I went through it as well. Me and my boyfriend also used to drink together (he still does), and at first, I found it really difficult and was afraid we’d have nothing in common after 9 years together, but it just meant taking a different approach to our relationship. I’ve started to make more of an effort to plan sober events together and I’ve made it clear that my sobriety is important to me. It is tough, I know, but I also don’t miss those nights where we’d fight and I’d get aggressive and not remember anything in the morning. It is definitely taking time, but our relationship is starting to get stronger and better than ever! Take it one day at a time and keep posting – you’ll ride this slump out and be happy you did

dontlookbacchus – You’re on day 80 today, not 79 hehe
I also need to work on something to get my insomnia in check. I know what you mean though about feeling off when sleep deprived…I woke up last week and for a split second I felt like I had a hangover. Scared me a little, but I was grateful it was just lack of sleep Hope you enjoyed your bike ride!

MrMcTell – Big congrats on 60 days!!!!! I also find it hard to believe that I let so many years slip by sometimes, but like you said...no looking back. The future is ours!

Kimmy - Way to go on skipping the Guinness on St. Paddy’s Day!!

CuteNGayYay – Day 64 for you ! Woot woot! I’ve never been to California, but it looks beautiful. Hope you’re enjoying a nice sunny day on the beach or somewhere lovely

jv369 – Congrats on getting over the 7-week mark! On your way to two months!!


Hope you all have a great day!
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Old 03-21-2017, 04:59 PM
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Beautiful and thaughtful post as always Ina. Xx
Much love to my fellow January family. Xx
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Old 03-22-2017, 02:44 AM
  # 27 (permalink)  
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Day 81
Thank you Ina for noticing I had forgotten to update my day count. Now the world is in in order again and I am back to being 1 day-count ahead. - No wonder people often stop counting days after 3 months, it is tough keeping track !

Hi Mr. M. I occasionally think about the what-if's : I hadn't spent so much money/time/talent/energy while drinking. Thinking "what-if " has been motivational, if I get week or feel I am loosing my way I sometimes think that way, but it depresses me too much. For me, focusing on the years ahead, and what I still might be able to achieve, through change and good decision making, feels constructive and happy. I think one of us on this thread refers to the past as being a like a monster. I can certainly visualise it that way.

I know I have seen real long-term change in my relationships with a few loved ones. If asked, none of them would ever want the relationship or me to go back to what it was like before. I am sure many are afraid it might do, as they like it now so much. They, like I, have invested so much getting to know each other in 2017. I wont go back to that life now. This is happening. I am shocked how selfish I was before.

On a more positive note, as it is morning, and I am drinking my first coffee, reading my classmates posts about their sobriety and reflecting on my own. This is such a great journey so far. Starting my day like this, feeling grateful for just being sober and setting achievable goals for the day has been a revelation. I have SR and you guys to largely thank for that.

Have a happy, sober and rewarding Wednesday Januarians . One more day.
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Old 03-22-2017, 03:12 AM
  # 28 (permalink)  
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Thank you Ina123, I'll continue... is the road up and down? I was excited and full of power until now that I feel low. I feel a bit paranoid...is that something others feel too? Maybe now I feel my emotions? I was too numb before? I feel a bit flat...
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Old 03-22-2017, 05:50 AM
  # 29 (permalink)  
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Congrats to Ina123 and DLB for hitting 80+ days sober. I'm looking forward to that milestone myself. Thanks Ina for taking a comment for everyone individually.

Not much to say here. I feel in a bit of a rut. Back to thinking I might have underlying (mild but really irritating) depressive issues that were masked by drinking and which won't go away by themselves. I spoke to the doctor yesterday (was taking my daughter in for a check up and got to speak with him for a bit) and we decided to push on and see where we are in another month.

Anyway, I'm planning on working on demolishing part of my barn today and rebuilding part of another one! Some mindless physical activity should drive me forwards a bit....

DLB --- yep, this class is helping me a lot. The sense of accountability and shared achievement has been very important to me.

Hoping you are all well today. MrM.
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Old 03-22-2017, 06:37 AM
  # 30 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by bubita View Post
Thank you Ina123, I'll continue... is the road up and down? I was excited and full of power until now that I feel low. I feel a bit paranoid...is that something others feel too? Maybe now I feel my emotions? I was too numb before? I feel a bit flat...
Bubita - I think we all have struggles like that- they seem to come and go. When my normal methods don't help with the urge to drink (HALT, play it forward, wait 10 minutes, come on here and read) I tell myself that I spent at least 12 years drinking heavily, so I should give sobriety the same chance. If I still feel the same in 12 years, maybe I'll have a drink, but it's only fair that I give it the same chance I gave drinking!

I'm lucky that this time around I haven't been hit too hard - nice weather seems to be a trigger for me - it was a big one last time around. This time I seem to know that I need to do it forever and moderation won't work and drinking again is no fun. I had to fall a few times to figure that out though. I definitely wouldn't recommend it! I say it a lot on here but I'm a big believer in the gratitude lists. I do the morning post every day, and then I add a few extra on days I'm feeling low. Remembering everything I have now that I'm sober, and everything I have to lose seems to shake any thoughts of drinking for me.
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Old 03-22-2017, 09:55 AM
  # 31 (permalink)  
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Ina- Lol we had rain yesterday but it was a nice day.
Kimmy -Much love back to yah
MrM- you're right. No looking back...we're not going that way
Phoenix- thank you
DLB - I always appreciate and relate your posts! This class wouldn't be the same without ya!
Bubita- I think it's normal to feel the 'pink cloud' for a while when first getting sober. Then we start to think more about the past and possibly where we couldve been or could've done and it starts to depress us a bit.. Stay strong. Life's so much better when sober. We'll all get through it together.
Site.- very good advice. I agree and hope this time is different for all of us.
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Old 03-22-2017, 02:47 PM
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I agree cngy- the past is a tool to learn from and grow from, not live in.
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Old 03-23-2017, 02:21 AM
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Day 82.
Good morning teammates. I am curious if any of you have noticed an improvement in how you respond now to stressful situations ?
It might be just be me, but now I am through the first couple of months of emotional rawness and screwed-up body chemistry, I am finding I can handle pressure in life stuff or at work much better.

I don't seem to emotionally react, or snap, that second, but can process and think a bit more. I don't end the day feeling mortally wounded because something F*cked up or because someone is a jerk. - I do still think they are a jerk but I don't feel personally attacked or tortured emotionally about it , my body then craving booze to "wind-down" again. Wearing myself down.

Yesterday I really recognised it. Today will be as stressful so I am looking forward to see how I do. Stepping back into some clarity, getting things into perspective for a few seconds, before deciding how to respond.

I think this might fall into the making better decisions category that being sober has afforded us now. For me, lashing out at the world, feeling attacked, might be something I am realising now I was doing. We'll see. Stuff for me to process now I have some distance from the old me. Unlike others, I still don't know why I drank, but this might be a clue.

Have a great day all. Thinking of the Brits in our group and the terrible events in London yesterday. Have another safe, sober and healthy day Januarians.
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Old 03-23-2017, 04:39 AM
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Hi guys. Day 56 here.
Dontlookbacchus, I have indeed found that I react so much better to stressful situations. Definitely not as emotional or anxious and have a lot more patience.
Hope you all have a great day. ❤️
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Old 03-23-2017, 02:37 PM
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Hi Januarians!

Sorry, I haven't posted in a while! I have been catching up on posts though. We are really chugging along!

Day 80 (thanks DLB!)

Things have been going pretty well, uneventful which is a good thing, I think. I have a gala to go to on Saturday for my husband's school (he is a HS principal). A bit nervous about that, it will be a big event, there will be booze, and I won't have an exit opportunity as my husband will have to stay to the very end.

I looked into changing my screen name, but was not able to do it. Instead, I chose an avatar which is a bit more sunny than my name!

Have a good sober evening, everyone.
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Old 03-24-2017, 02:50 AM
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Day 83.
Hi all. A quick one as I have yet to fit a bike ride in before getting ready for work.

NACN, I am sure you will be great at the gala. Planning, up front, seems to be what CassandreLee uses, and I tried. It worked for me. Picturing the situation and planning how to react to certain events. Love the bright new avatar !

Kimmy, glad to know I am not the only one who has seen this improvement. It is a significant change to be able to handle stressful situations better, with clarity.

good to see you around Pheonix

Have a wonderful Friday classmates. One more day
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Old 03-24-2017, 01:25 PM
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Hi classmates! Sorry haven't been checking in recently but great to read how well you are all doing

Still sober here, day 83 today (I think) and things are improving day by day. Still early days but slowly but surely I'm getting my life back. Still have tough days and sometimes I'm overwhelmed now that I'm actually allowing myself to feel, the emotions can be strong when they are not being drowned in vodka! I'm in for the long haul though, I never want to go back to being that broken person. Nobody deserves that life, it is utterly miserable and I remind myself of that and play the tape through when temptation rears its ugly head.

Anyway enough from me, hope you are all well x
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Old 03-24-2017, 01:28 PM
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Just checking in, too. 63 days. Nine weeks.
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Old 03-24-2017, 03:07 PM
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Good morning classmates - Day 71 and feeling healthy.

I will always be grateful for waking up to a new day, sober. It's like being a kid on Christmas morning.

I've faced quite a bit of stress during the last few days, particularly at work. Yesterday I felt quite anxious over a work situation and I was talking to some colleagues and they said how they couldn't wait to get home and have a few drinks to unwind. Then I started to think how nice that would be as well. Just to let the stress, wash away. I considered having a drink, for about 10 minutes, but my mind started to play the tape, the first few sips, then a glass, then the bottle etc.... then, the morning after, waking up today, sick and depressed. I think I'm learning that stress and worry is part of everyday life and I can actually cope without alcohol. Chocolate is my new addiction, although I do have it under control and only eat it at night.

NACN I was in your shoes last week. I also had a Gala event. I really visualized the night, over and over, prior to going and could see myself having a good time, sober, with a non-alcoholic beverage. Also I imagined what I was going to say when people offered me a drink, or asked me why I wasn't drinking. I hope you have a great sober night.
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Old 03-24-2017, 03:19 PM
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Congrats on all the milestones guys - have a good sober weekend

D
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