F.I.S.T. (The First Insanity Survivors Thread)
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: PA and Florida
Posts: 4,179
Any alkie that doesn't totally understand your story (including her) is a FAKE ALKIE. She will totally understand. I'm sure she knows you pretty well, too...
Let it go...do some work...take a walk and get a decadent coffee...watch some mindless tube...a long a** shower or tubby...have some ice cream...surprise hubby with flowers...(fill in your own)
Bottom line - let it go....
Let it go...do some work...take a walk and get a decadent coffee...watch some mindless tube...a long a** shower or tubby...have some ice cream...surprise hubby with flowers...(fill in your own)
Bottom line - let it go....
Member
Join Date: Nov 2016
Location: Anywhere USA
Posts: 2,097
Hi Ya'll, had a nice day exploring and driving around. Saw lots of wildlife, mule deer, antelope and some mountain goats that I do not get to see a whole lot. they were just hanging out on their ledges enjoying the sunshine. Didn't get my blackberry shake, but if you are ever in Cambridge Idaho, stop at Bucky's Diner and order their Basin Burger, half pnd of beef with swiss cheese, mushrooms and bacon, with fries that comes with excellent fry sauce, which I also put on the burger Fortunately there are lots of napkins because it is messy. So instead of the shake I settled for a Dr. Pepper. The only thing missing would have been a slice of pie,,, which I didn't see and just now thought of,,,,,dang it....
Still not drinking here! although my pie AV is starting to get louder,,,,,,, its always something isn't it?
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Still not drinking here! although my pie AV is starting to get louder,,,,,,, its always something isn't it?
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Guest
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Ashburn, VA
Posts: 30,196
Sounds like a terrific meal Badge! I love old-style grilled burgers! Hard to find these days! You've got to grab the opportunity when you see it!
Cour, treat the roiling in your head just as you would treat a drinking craving: stay distracted, as Carlos suggested,
You'll find that with time the issue will fade and she will diminish to no importance.
It's best that you told her that you don't want to see her again.
Cour, treat the roiling in your head just as you would treat a drinking craving: stay distracted, as Carlos suggested,
You'll find that with time the issue will fade and she will diminish to no importance.
It's best that you told her that you don't want to see her again.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: PA and Florida
Posts: 4,179
Good morning, all. Hey C2...hope the squirrels are resting.
Kris, I just noticed that you are a fellow Floridian. Haha, I'm only slightly over a year here...along the coast (no, not waterfront - but close enough to walk
) in a Tampa suburb. I thought that you were in MI? Anyway, I'm lovin this FL thing to the max.
I have an issue that I'd like to pass along for suggestions...
Yesterday afternoon a gym friend messaged me on fb and asked me if I was single and if I wanted to go out for a date thing. I really like her - but not in a potential relationship way. We take like 4 classes together every week....and that will continue. I took the easy way out and said that I was seeing someone and while not an exclusive thing, it might feel strange to meet someone else. Truth be told...my last 4 date fling ended this weekend...haha, on good terms.
This would not be that big a deal, but for the fact that we will probs be seeing each other often - each week - for a long time.
I told her that we could talk about it after a class....that now looms at 4:30.
Any suggestions would be appreciated.
No need to drink or drug today....
Carlos
Kris, I just noticed that you are a fellow Floridian. Haha, I'm only slightly over a year here...along the coast (no, not waterfront - but close enough to walk
) in a Tampa suburb. I thought that you were in MI? Anyway, I'm lovin this FL thing to the max. I have an issue that I'd like to pass along for suggestions...
Yesterday afternoon a gym friend messaged me on fb and asked me if I was single and if I wanted to go out for a date thing. I really like her - but not in a potential relationship way. We take like 4 classes together every week....and that will continue. I took the easy way out and said that I was seeing someone and while not an exclusive thing, it might feel strange to meet someone else. Truth be told...my last 4 date fling ended this weekend...haha, on good terms.
This would not be that big a deal, but for the fact that we will probs be seeing each other often - each week - for a long time.
I told her that we could talk about it after a class....that now looms at 4:30.
Any suggestions would be appreciated.
No need to drink or drug today....
Carlos
Guest
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Ashburn, VA
Posts: 30,196
It's good to be honest.
Tell her that you are very, very fond of her as a friend and want to keep your relationship in that capacity.
You are very fond of her: and telling her that you're "very, very" or "extremely" fond will comfort her that you at least find her genuinely worthwhile as a person.
She'll probably be at least a little embarrassed at first, but this is the nicest way to let her down gently and make her feel less awkward about seeing you at the gym.
Tell her that you are very, very fond of her as a friend and want to keep your relationship in that capacity.
You are very fond of her: and telling her that you're "very, very" or "extremely" fond will comfort her that you at least find her genuinely worthwhile as a person.
She'll probably be at least a little embarrassed at first, but this is the nicest way to let her down gently and make her feel less awkward about seeing you at the gym.
p***enger
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: NYC
Posts: 19,025
Thanks everyone. My squirrels are sleeping, sssshhhh.
Carlos -- relationships!! The problem is always other people, right?
Can you go with her somewhere really benign and pseudo-spontaneous like the gym juice bar or a coffee shop in walking distance? Is she going to insist on directly confronting the "date" question -- that's totally bad taste. I'd just field that with "let's see how coffee goes -- no hurry, tell me about yourself." When sparks don't fly -- although who knows? -- say how pleasant it was (if it was), maybe let's do it again.
I think no-more-than casual friendliness combined w/emotional non-availability will teach her that the relationship isn't going anywhere and she'll soon send her efforts elsewhere.
Carlos -- relationships!! The problem is always other people, right?
Can you go with her somewhere really benign and pseudo-spontaneous like the gym juice bar or a coffee shop in walking distance? Is she going to insist on directly confronting the "date" question -- that's totally bad taste. I'd just field that with "let's see how coffee goes -- no hurry, tell me about yourself." When sparks don't fly -- although who knows? -- say how pleasant it was (if it was), maybe let's do it again.
I think no-more-than casual friendliness combined w/emotional non-availability will teach her that the relationship isn't going anywhere and she'll soon send her efforts elsewhere.
Guest
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Ashburn, VA
Posts: 30,196
When I was young, I hurt someone by discounting my instincts and telling myself that I didn't know for sure that he liked me in that way, so I couldn't presume--and I wound up doing more emotional damage than if I had just nipped things in the bud at the start.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: PA and Florida
Posts: 4,179
Thanks, both of you.
While I like both...the decision is hard. In fact, it kinda sucks. Geeze, even have had some "why me...I'm not worth liking" as a way to deflect. Pretty alkie stuff.
The possibility of hurting someones feelings sucks - big time!
While I like both...the decision is hard. In fact, it kinda sucks. Geeze, even have had some "why me...I'm not worth liking" as a way to deflect. Pretty alkie stuff.
The possibility of hurting someones feelings sucks - big time!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Northern Michigan
Posts: 28,801
Hi Carlos,
Just be honest and kind. Go with your gut on this.
On another note:
I am from Michigan but winter in Florida. Where did you live before? I love Florida in the winter but love MI in the summer. I've been lucky to have a job that worked anywhere. Recently retired.
Just be honest and kind. Go with your gut on this.
On another note:
I am from Michigan but winter in Florida. Where did you live before? I love Florida in the winter but love MI in the summer. I've been lucky to have a job that worked anywhere. Recently retired.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: New England, USA
Posts: 3,958
Just a quick stop to say hi. I got confirmation tonight that someone is buying my house next week! Lots of work to do here.
Courage - I had to break up with my first sponsor. I did a good job of avoiding the same meetings as her. I was pretty ticked when she started showing up at the meetings I liked. (Wasn't long before she vanished again.)
Carlos - How did it turn out with your classmate?
All - have a good day!
Courage - I had to break up with my first sponsor. I did a good job of avoiding the same meetings as her. I was pretty ticked when she started showing up at the meetings I liked. (Wasn't long before she vanished again.)
Carlos - How did it turn out with your classmate?
All - have a good day!
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