Class of March 2016 part 42
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 3,190
Originally Posted by samantha14 
BBG - did you see the story about the BBT cast members who are being paid more than others per episode and they are taking pay cuts so that they can all be equal...so cool
Member
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Australia
Posts: 2,098
Just confessing before I change my mind - I was very close to drinking an hour ago, gave myself permission to buy 2 cans of vodka lemonade stuff because it doesn't taste like alcohol and since I've been sober the thought of the taste makes me ill, which luckily made me really think about how stupid it would be to drink at all. There's part of me that thinks maybe I should still grab those cans for tomorrow or 'just in case' even though I'm not interested in drinking today anymore
Idk addict brains are silly I guess. I don't think I'll buy any, just writing it out to try and push myself away from the thought
Idk addict brains are silly I guess. I don't think I'll buy any, just writing it out to try and push myself away from the thought
Member
Join Date: Jun 2016
Location: Adelaide, Australia
Posts: 28,647
immri- so well done. Keep posting.
ch- health- good you are on track.
A d & m here.
I just completed first down to business counselling session with the new guy. He and I have sussed each other out (ALL good)- gave him everything of relevance I have shared here. I told him where I am in mind space and what I intend to achieve and set out how I intend to do that. He identified some areas of my narrative that to him scream out for further deep hard work. He also said matter of factly that I have achieved more here in the last week- progress wise than most do in 3 months. A very serious (to me) recovery program.
I went from an affluent middle class home- to ICU , near homelessness with nothing to where I am today.
I am grateful to my virtual March family, which listens and supports my weirdly ways.
Thank you all. I feel at peace at the present and sadness for once what was. But that is natural and okay- now.
ch- health- good you are on track.
A d & m here.
I just completed first down to business counselling session with the new guy. He and I have sussed each other out (ALL good)- gave him everything of relevance I have shared here. I told him where I am in mind space and what I intend to achieve and set out how I intend to do that. He identified some areas of my narrative that to him scream out for further deep hard work. He also said matter of factly that I have achieved more here in the last week- progress wise than most do in 3 months. A very serious (to me) recovery program.
I went from an affluent middle class home- to ICU , near homelessness with nothing to where I am today.
I am grateful to my virtual March family, which listens and supports my weirdly ways.
Thank you all. I feel at peace at the present and sadness for once what was. But that is natural and okay- now.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2016
Location: St. Louis, Mo
Posts: 7,334
Immri- well done telling on yourself. Am remembering what must have been the last time you drank. You found a bottle in a drawer or something. You were pretty much a mess. You've come so far. Whatever's going on, drinking's not the answer. Love you.
Phx- I'm sad for your past too. Hugs.
Phx- I'm sad for your past too. Hugs.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Australia
Posts: 2,098
Thanks Bobbie that helps a lot, the further I get from the last time I drank the harder it gets to remember why I stopped and why I can't join in with the normies. Checking in here and reading things like that has snapped me out of my delusion again and I'm on my way home without any alcohol. Thanks ❤
Member
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 3,197
Morning!
Well winter is back here with a vengeance! Goodbye mild, warm temps...hello wind and snow squalls. Guess there's no question how to dress today....it's pj's and a jacket for sure!
Immri - great job talking yourself through it! It's definitely much harder to pull yourself back once it's in your hand.
PJ - I am so grateful you're here...even with your weirdly ways. You inspire me.
Well off to face the day. Only at work til eleven and then heading off on our adventure....feeling excited but hesitant.
Happy Thursday!!
Well winter is back here with a vengeance! Goodbye mild, warm temps...hello wind and snow squalls. Guess there's no question how to dress today....it's pj's and a jacket for sure!
Immri - great job talking yourself through it! It's definitely much harder to pull yourself back once it's in your hand.
PJ - I am so grateful you're here...even with your weirdly ways. You inspire me.
Well off to face the day. Only at work til eleven and then heading off on our adventure....feeling excited but hesitant.
Happy Thursday!!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 3,197
Dee - thanks for always being here (like everywhere...all the time) - and thanks for the invite to the new March class..will stop by and check it out. Strange to think how I'm still struggling from a year ago but also so much stronger and further along.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: US
Posts: 16,876
So proud of you Immri ~ it sounds like the AV sneaked in for a surprise visit.....awesome job kicking its ass to the curb! 
Have a great trip Sam! I have the same hesitations about vacationing.....you've got this!
Hello to everyone else too!
Part of the reading from last night:
Remember that your substance abuse is something that you once
learned to do. Now that you have been through detox, you need to
“unlearn” substance use and “relearn” how to live sober. You may
be drug-free, but you are still on “automatic pilot.” You could drink
or use drugs without thinking about it.
Nothing we don't already know, but I figure it's a good reminder. Talk to you guys a 'lil later!
Have a great trip Sam! I have the same hesitations about vacationing.....you've got this!
Hello to everyone else too!
Part of the reading from last night:
Remember that your substance abuse is something that you once
learned to do. Now that you have been through detox, you need to
“unlearn” substance use and “relearn” how to live sober. You may
be drug-free, but you are still on “automatic pilot.” You could drink
or use drugs without thinking about it.
Nothing we don't already know, but I figure it's a good reminder. Talk to you guys a 'lil later!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2016
Location: St. Louis, Mo
Posts: 7,334
The fir tree has no choice about starting its life in the crack of a rock.... What [nourishment] it finds is often meager, and above the ground appears a twisted trunk, grown in irregular spurts, marred by dead and broken branches, and bent far to one side by the battering winds. Yet at the top ... some twigs hold their green needles year after year, giving proof that - misshapen, imperfect, scarred - the tree lives.
—Harriet Arrow
We often wish we had been born into better circumstances or blame our parents for our problems. Like the fir tree we could say, "If only I had taken sprout in a fertile meadow, life would be easier." "If only I had had a better life as a boy . . ." "If only I didn't have my particular hardships . . ."
By accepting the facts of our own lives, we mature into feelings of joy and pleasure alongside our griefs. Every man has to struggle with his own unique set of circumstances, even if they are not fair. Fairness is not an issue. Reality is what we have to deal with.
I will accept life on its own terms and rejoice in it.
—Harriet Arrow
We often wish we had been born into better circumstances or blame our parents for our problems. Like the fir tree we could say, "If only I had taken sprout in a fertile meadow, life would be easier." "If only I had had a better life as a boy . . ." "If only I didn't have my particular hardships . . ."
By accepting the facts of our own lives, we mature into feelings of joy and pleasure alongside our griefs. Every man has to struggle with his own unique set of circumstances, even if they are not fair. Fairness is not an issue. Reality is what we have to deal with.
I will accept life on its own terms and rejoice in it.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2016
Location: St. Louis, Mo
Posts: 7,334
I really like today's meditation.
Everyone speaking of boring lives - I think what we are experiencing is what the Big Book calls "discontent". That was me for sure. Never happy in my own skin, always looking for more. As I become more at peace with myself, the discontent fades away. One of the ways I do this is practicing mindfulness. It truly has helped me find the peace I was always searching for in a bottle. Hope this helps.
Everyone speaking of boring lives - I think what we are experiencing is what the Big Book calls "discontent". That was me for sure. Never happy in my own skin, always looking for more. As I become more at peace with myself, the discontent fades away. One of the ways I do this is practicing mindfulness. It truly has helped me find the peace I was always searching for in a bottle. Hope this helps.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2016
Location: St. Louis, Mo
Posts: 7,334
Okay, that's about as deep as I'm going to get.
Happy freaking Thursday, March people!
Sam - enjoy your half day and your trip!
Immri - great job last night!
Purple- I really like the reading you shared.
CH - good morning! Have a great day at work.
Everyone - have the best day ever! I'm going to try.
Happy freaking Thursday, March people!
Sam - enjoy your half day and your trip!
Immri - great job last night!
Purple- I really like the reading you shared.
CH - good morning! Have a great day at work.
Everyone - have the best day ever! I'm going to try.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2016
Location: St. Louis, Mo
Posts: 7,334
Okay, that's about as deep as I'm going to get.
Happy freaking Thursday, March people!
Sam - enjoy your half day and your trip!
Immri - great job last night!
Purple- I really like the reading you shared.
CH - good morning! Have a great day at work.
Everyone - have the best day ever! I'm going to try.
Happy freaking Thursday, March people!
Sam - enjoy your half day and your trip!
Immri - great job last night!
Purple- I really like the reading you shared.
CH - good morning! Have a great day at work.
Everyone - have the best day ever! I'm going to try.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: US
Posts: 16,876
Just stopping by on coffee break....Today I received an invite to the Pub this weekend....a friend hired a local band & I've been asked to join everyone "like old times" ~~~ to me that includes, but is not limited to:
-Spending all my $$$
-Not remembering anything
-The chance of crossing paths with people I dont want to see or talk to
-Feeling like total crap for several days afterward....
You mean those old times?!?! I think I'll pass!
-Spending all my $$$
-Not remembering anything
-The chance of crossing paths with people I dont want to see or talk to
-Feeling like total crap for several days afterward....
You mean those old times?!?! I think I'll pass!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Glen Allen, Va
Posts: 2,589
Hola Marchers! I'll try and expand on what I said about being bored. I feel great these days. Just bouncing with energy. So me trying to sit down and enjoy watching TV and movies for hours has become harder.
While I was er..non-sober, alcohol had taken over my life. I had pushed away my family and friends, stopped taking care of myself, my land, my house, etc. All I had come to enjoy was coming home and drinking until I passed out and wake up to get to work the next day.
Now I'm exercising every day, visiting and talking to my family, taking care of everything once again. I still fall into that "dry drunk" thing though. It's hard on me to stop trying to enjoy things I used to, but that I no longer do, due to me being sober. I keep trying to enjoy them anyways. I'm a work in progress! I guess me being bored is really just part of the healing process in returning to being a healthy, sober person once again. I would never want to return to the old, drunken days. I hope this rambling post helps!
While I was er..non-sober, alcohol had taken over my life. I had pushed away my family and friends, stopped taking care of myself, my land, my house, etc. All I had come to enjoy was coming home and drinking until I passed out and wake up to get to work the next day.
Now I'm exercising every day, visiting and talking to my family, taking care of everything once again. I still fall into that "dry drunk" thing though. It's hard on me to stop trying to enjoy things I used to, but that I no longer do, due to me being sober. I keep trying to enjoy them anyways. I'm a work in progress! I guess me being bored is really just part of the healing process in returning to being a healthy, sober person once again. I would never want to return to the old, drunken days. I hope this rambling post helps!
Member
Join Date: May 2014
Location: Valley of the Sun, AZ
Posts: 3,458
I like that clarification, Upstairs. I used to just go home and drink myself into oblivion. I was bored, but I was too stupid to know it!
I don't know if it's so much that I'm bored, it's just that I have more time to do things now - because I'm not incapacitated! Sometimes I do fun things. Sometimes I play solitaire on my MacBook
I don't know if it's so much that I'm bored, it's just that I have more time to do things now - because I'm not incapacitated! Sometimes I do fun things. Sometimes I play solitaire on my MacBook
Member
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: US
Posts: 16,876
I can relate to being a work in progress - perhaps we all can?!?! 
About the "boredom" thing, I can relate to that too. But I also am working on re-thinking it. Now I like my "boring" life, because that makes it more difficult for others to spread nasty rumors about me!
I am currently multitasking......got my journal open on another computer and letting stuff pour out. I hope this doesn't become a trigger because I can already feel the anxiety building up. So if you hear the sound of someone violently pounding away at a computer keyboard, that's me!!!
About the "boredom" thing, I can relate to that too. But I also am working on re-thinking it. Now I like my "boring" life, because that makes it more difficult for others to spread nasty rumors about me!
I am currently multitasking......got my journal open on another computer and letting stuff pour out. I hope this doesn't become a trigger because I can already feel the anxiety building up. So if you hear the sound of someone violently pounding away at a computer keyboard, that's me!!!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Australia
Posts: 2,098
I think the boredom thing is really interesting. For me, I think it's one part working without much downtime and one part depression. I've actually noticed the further away I get from drinking the more interested I am in life again - I read 4 books in 5 days last week! I would not have had any interest in doing that when I was newly sober. But it's been an exhausting week and in the midst of one of my lowest moods I get maybe 3 times a year. I feel a bit better now, or at least can see it won't last forever, but I (and I think lots of alcoholics) really struggle to see beyond today, I tend to think how I feel now is how I'll always feel. That's what makes me think of drinking again I think and why I've been bored. i really like the different perspectives though, it's cool so many of us seem to feel the same thing for different reasons
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 2 (0 members and 2 guests)
