I Will Not Drink/Use Today Part 4
Guest
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Ashburn, VA
Posts: 30,196
I know what triggered the dream. Yesterday I saw a headline:
"P DIDDY SUPER BOWL PARTY: SHOTS FIRED"
Turns out they meant shots of his signature vodka. (Eye roll)
Anyway, that silly headline was enough to plant the idea of shots in my subconscious!
Moral: be careful of what goes into your head as well as what goes into your mouth!
"P DIDDY SUPER BOWL PARTY: SHOTS FIRED"
Turns out they meant shots of his signature vodka. (Eye roll)
Anyway, that silly headline was enough to plant the idea of shots in my subconscious!
Moral: be careful of what goes into your head as well as what goes into your mouth!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
Gilmer, 
Glee, you'll be glad when everything is packed.
I also had an odd dream. At one point in the dream I had to turn down pills, drinks, sex, lying, and theft. Geez, hit me where it hurts, dream.
It was a very odd dream and I'm not even gonna try to analyze it.
Onward. It's still o'dark thirty so I can't see any birds, C2.
Have a great Tuesday, everyone. No drinking or drugs or lying or thievin' for me today.
Glee, you'll be glad when everything is packed.
I also had an odd dream. At one point in the dream I had to turn down pills, drinks, sex, lying, and theft. Geez, hit me where it hurts, dream.
It was a very odd dream and I'm not even gonna try to analyze it.Onward. It's still o'dark thirty so I can't see any birds, C2.
Have a great Tuesday, everyone. No drinking or drugs or lying or thievin' for me today.
p***enger
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: NYC
Posts: 19,039
Great to meetcha Kimmy & I'm glad you and all of us won't be drinking today!
Am I ever just steady from one day to the next?
I thoroughly deserved that rejection I received yesterday, but it's making me question my whole career. The problem is that I'm paid to say and write things very earnestly, and convey important truths and knowledge -- but I wink at all of it--it's just rhetoric to me. So how do I get along without hypocrisy, but also stay productive so I can get promoted (because we need the income to stay off catfood)? Believe it or not, this is a sobriety question.
Whatever the answer, I'm not going to drink today.
Am I ever just steady from one day to the next?
I thoroughly deserved that rejection I received yesterday, but it's making me question my whole career. The problem is that I'm paid to say and write things very earnestly, and convey important truths and knowledge -- but I wink at all of it--it's just rhetoric to me. So how do I get along without hypocrisy, but also stay productive so I can get promoted (because we need the income to stay off catfood)? Believe it or not, this is a sobriety question.Whatever the answer, I'm not going to drink today.
Guest
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Ashburn, VA
Posts: 30,196
((((Courage))))
Maybe it would help to put it in different terms.
Resolve to give of your very best. Look at the dog and pony show as a gift that you give.
I expect it would be hard at this stage to start over in a new career while retaining anything near the salary you're now getting.
So realistically the only thing that can change is your outlook.
If a dog and pony show is what your bosses require, give them the finest dog and pony show that you can muster.
Sometimes we hold our noses and keep slogging, not because the work is worthwhile, but because we have integrity.
I know you feel that your integrity is being jeopardized by the work itself--and on one level it is. They expect earnest and you're not earnest.
But there's integrity on a different plane, too. When you do even an abysmal thing well, there is integrity. The beauty is not in the subject, but in your sacrifice.
Maybe it would help to put it in different terms.
Resolve to give of your very best. Look at the dog and pony show as a gift that you give.
I expect it would be hard at this stage to start over in a new career while retaining anything near the salary you're now getting.
So realistically the only thing that can change is your outlook.
If a dog and pony show is what your bosses require, give them the finest dog and pony show that you can muster.
Sometimes we hold our noses and keep slogging, not because the work is worthwhile, but because we have integrity.
I know you feel that your integrity is being jeopardized by the work itself--and on one level it is. They expect earnest and you're not earnest.
But there's integrity on a different plane, too. When you do even an abysmal thing well, there is integrity. The beauty is not in the subject, but in your sacrifice.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
C2, I say challenge the status quo. Be a rebel.
Just tell the truth as you see it and let the chips fall where they may. I know this is easy for me to say, but I've been fired from two jobs for telling the truth and I don't regret it.
Of course, I have no idea what you're talking about. Your problems are not even in my language.
Just tell the truth as you see it and let the chips fall where they may. I know this is easy for me to say, but I've been fired from two jobs for telling the truth and I don't regret it.
Of course, I have no idea what you're talking about. Your problems are not even in my language.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
Grocery shopping is a racket. I try to buy things on special and then get to the end and find out I've picked up the full price thing right next to the sale thing and end up spending more than I needed to.
FWP
Sometimes I'd like to have less choices, though, for real.
FWP
Sometimes I'd like to have less choices, though, for real.
Administrator
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,426
When I was in academia I didn't cope well with having papers rejected either..
Sometimes I submitted a great paper - but politics or personalities sunk me...
sometimes, usually for valid reasons like time, or interest, I submitted a paper I could have done better on...but I was still v good at my job in both cases.
the other side of the coin is I became a historian to make a difference...I soon found that wasn't what anyone else was doing, and in my opinion the whole discipline was about moving facts around to support whatever argument got you tenure or the best funding or a column in the newspaper whatever.
I was pushed before I jumped tho...and I thought for a long time I was unlucky I lost that career through ill health...
but now I'm thrilled it led, eventually, to me really making a difference, here.
Of course I have to balance that with some pretty abject poverty LOL
I'm happy but I do sometimes think of where I might be with the money I used to make....
The point is...
There are pros and cons to every decision - the good thing is you don't have to decide today Courage
D
Sometimes I submitted a great paper - but politics or personalities sunk me...
sometimes, usually for valid reasons like time, or interest, I submitted a paper I could have done better on...but I was still v good at my job in both cases.
the other side of the coin is I became a historian to make a difference...I soon found that wasn't what anyone else was doing, and in my opinion the whole discipline was about moving facts around to support whatever argument got you tenure or the best funding or a column in the newspaper whatever.
I was pushed before I jumped tho...and I thought for a long time I was unlucky I lost that career through ill health...
but now I'm thrilled it led, eventually, to me really making a difference, here.
Of course I have to balance that with some pretty abject poverty LOL
I'm happy but I do sometimes think of where I might be with the money I used to make....
The point is...
There are pros and cons to every decision - the good thing is you don't have to decide today Courage
D
Originally Posted by courage2 
Great to meetcha Kimmy & I'm glad you and all of us won't be drinking today!
Am I ever just steady from one day to the next? I thoroughly deserved that rejection I received yesterday, but it's making me question my whole career. The problem is that I'm paid to say and write things very earnestly, and convey important truths and knowledge -- but I wink at all of it--it's just rhetoric to me. So how do I get along without hypocrisy, but also stay productive so I can get promoted (because we need the income to stay off catfood)? Believe it or not, this is a sobriety question.
Whatever the answer, I'm not going to drink today.
Am I ever just steady from one day to the next?
I thoroughly deserved that rejection I received yesterday, but it's making me question my whole career. The problem is that I'm paid to say and write things very earnestly, and convey important truths and knowledge -- but I wink at all of it--it's just rhetoric to me. So how do I get along without hypocrisy, but also stay productive so I can get promoted (because we need the income to stay off catfood)? Believe it or not, this is a sobriety question.Whatever the answer, I'm not going to drink today.
p***enger
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: NYC
Posts: 19,039
Thanks for the understanding you guys. Wherever I might go and whatever I might do, there are influences that will find me vulnerable -- even alone and shutting off the world, I managed to drink myself halfway to hell. I just can't seem to get it right. I could upset the status quo for 20 years and it's like screaming in a vacuum. For the time being, I keep going.
I read the poem "The Planet On The Table" today (Wallace Stevens):
bim, I'd like to have fewer choices, too.
No alcohol today. xxxxoooo --
I read the poem "The Planet On The Table" today (Wallace Stevens):
It was not important that they survive.
What mattered was that they should bear
Some lineament or character,
Some affluence, if only half-perceived,
In the poverty of their words,
Of the planet of which they were part.
What mattered was that they should bear
Some lineament or character,
Some affluence, if only half-perceived,
In the poverty of their words,
Of the planet of which they were part.
No alcohol today. xxxxoooo --
Member
Join Date: Nov 2016
Location: Anywhere USA
Posts: 2,099
Had a fun day, buying baby stuff for my niece who will be arriving in April. Since I have not had a child of my own, I am clueless as to what is really needed, so what ever shiny, pretty, sanitary bobble I saw went into my cart. It will be quite the hodgepodge of a care package, but its all in the effort right!
Today is Wednesday, and I make it a practice not to drink on Wednesdays, I will continue that habit today!
Badge
Today is Wednesday, and I make it a practice not to drink on Wednesdays, I will continue that habit today!
Badge
Guest
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Ashburn, VA
Posts: 30,196
Badge, IMO a basket full of interesting stuff is more fun most of the time than one big gift--particularly if you don't know what utilitarian stuff she needs.
So often at baby showers the mom-to-be gets a lot of duplicates of things like baby washcloths, so I'm sure your gift will be a refreshing change of pace.
So often at baby showers the mom-to-be gets a lot of duplicates of things like baby washcloths, so I'm sure your gift will be a refreshing change of pace.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: PA and Florida
Posts: 4,179
Hi, all. In a bit of a busy stretch these past few days and I will need to catch up on the postings at a later point. However, all during the past couple and today there has been and will be no plans to drink or drug.
Have a good one...Carlos
Have a good one...Carlos
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