Class of November 2016 Support Thread Part 2
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: New York
Posts: 3,241
I remember you, sunflower, as we both have young kiddos (6, 5 and 1 here). Sure makes it interesting right? Sometimes I want to throw in the towel as I believe I will never be able to get sober while they're so young - lol! But I'm pretty sure every age will offer its own tough parts. And rewarding parts.
I just want to sleep a solid night, that's my biggest trigger right now. Exhaustion.
I'm wishing you a peaceful day 1.
I just want to sleep a solid night, that's my biggest trigger right now. Exhaustion.
I'm wishing you a peaceful day 1.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 593
Checking in for day 2. Day 1 went a whole lot better than I would have expected, considering my "taper" had been 12 packs. Some extra BP meds, lots of vitamins, hibiscus tea (for BP). Seems to have worked so I will repeat today! Whew. I'm grateful it's going easy so far.
That will be the last day 1, period. My body and mind won't take any more, and I want to get back to living. My wife told me she's been apartment shopping, told me she wants to give me half what we owe on the house and walk away. It's all become very, very real and I hope I can repair some of this.
So I commit to day 2, no matter what. I can (hopefully) repair some of the damage once I'm in the clear, but today sobriety is priority #1. Let's all make it the highest priority.
Welcome sunflower. Together we can do this.
Have a great day one and all.
That will be the last day 1, period. My body and mind won't take any more, and I want to get back to living. My wife told me she's been apartment shopping, told me she wants to give me half what we owe on the house and walk away. It's all become very, very real and I hope I can repair some of this.
So I commit to day 2, no matter what. I can (hopefully) repair some of the damage once I'm in the clear, but today sobriety is priority #1. Let's all make it the highest priority.
Welcome sunflower. Together we can do this.
Have a great day one and all.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2015
Posts: 2,031
Originally Posted by keeppushing 
Well, yesterday I snapped a 4 day streak. I've been up since before dawn trying to figure out how to improve. As I was screwing around on the forums, I realised that, drum roll please, I hadn't checked in to SR in 3 days. So that is going into my permanent schedule until it becomes a habit.
I really am glad for you guys, you mean so much to me. I've been looking for love in all the wrong places
I really am glad for you guys, you mean so much to me. I've been looking for love in all the wrong places
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 625
Day 7...thinking about stuff, my life, goals, etc. I am feeling aggravated with my husband. Underlying issues exist. I think he is aggravated that I don't want to go out to a local bar and watch football today. I don't care. I am staying home today, need to take care of myself.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2015
Posts: 2,031
Originally Posted by LowSpark
Day 25 for me is coming to a close. Finally! Today has been the worst for me yet. Wanted to drink all day and still want to. Fighting the urge. Not going to. Day 26 is a new day and I look forward to it.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2015
Posts: 2,031
Originally Posted by Miramira
Feeling extremely down and alone today. List for words, imagine that!
Thanks to all for responses to my posts.
Welcome to new comers and returnees.
Well done to all who stayed sober.
Not dwelling in the past just realising what it has created
Definately doing this for myself just concerned that how I lived the first eight years of my sons life has been an example that will stick. Dee very adamately assured me that that would not be the case and I'm choosing to believe him.
Living a very isolated life. It's hard.
Thanks to all for responses to my posts.
Welcome to new comers and returnees.
Well done to all who stayed sober.
Not dwelling in the past just realising what it has created
Definately doing this for myself just concerned that how I lived the first eight years of my sons life has been an example that will stick. Dee very adamately assured me that that would not be the case and I'm choosing to believe him.
Living a very isolated life. It's hard.
I too suffer from depression, but realize drinking just makes it worse so the longer I'm sober, the better my disposition. And when I drink, I tend to isolate myself which makes me even more depressed.
Can you get out today for a walk or visit someone?
Don't give in, don't give up!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2015
Posts: 2,031
Originally Posted by Sunflowerlife
I'm back again.
So, so tired of waking up with feelings of guilt, an exhausted body and heart.
Each time I drink is a wasted hour, wasted day- nothing positive comes out of it- I end up eating too much, not taking care of myself, doing nothing but numbing the pain I feel inside.
I drank all day yesterday to cure my hangover from the night before. 2 bottles of wine which started at 10:30 in the morning. Something about that just isn't right.
I'm up now hoping to grab some peace before the kids are up (2 and 5). I have no concrete plans for today: maybe some pilates which is probably the only exercise my body can handle as it recovers, a few errands to run and I've gotta get all the fall/winter clothes organized as summer has just recently left us here in Florida. On my list is also to continue reading Rational Recovery- I want to fully try it as a way to recover without AA. If it doesn't help I will definitely look elsewhere for added support as it's obvious I can't do this alone.
I am numb. For a while I convinced myself that I don't have a drinking problem- forget the "A" word, I'm not even going there.
But the truth is, I'm a much better person when I'm sober. I'm more spiritual, more energized, more motivated, a better Mom and wife, a better me.
Doesn't that sound like enough to make a person quit?
2 events coming up this week that I need to plan for: Date night with hubby is on Friday. His idea of date night is dinner and lots of drinks. I need to find something for us to do where we can connect without booze (this is rare for us which has been part of the problem these 5 years we've been married.)
Having people over for dinner Saturday- this will be easy because they are not big drinkers. The only trigger will be if DH decides to drink. I wish he wouldn't. I wish he would support me, knowing how long I've struggled and how often I've tried to stop. I know it's not his fault and sometime soon I am going to have to accept the fact that he cannot support me in this and that is OK. I know I'll get there.
Anyway- I look foward to getting to know you all. I will check in if I'm feeling tempted. Today is the only day I worry about because I usually drink to get over the way I feel from drinking the day before (because that makes a lot of sense.) But I do have a lot to do and I need to be on the road at 7 am tomorrow for work so it would be best to keep myself sober and focused on the positive.
I have so many things I want to change about my life, so many dreams about the person I want and need to be. Alcohol doesn't allow me to be any of it really. Now I just need to find the strength to stop...
So, so tired of waking up with feelings of guilt, an exhausted body and heart.
Each time I drink is a wasted hour, wasted day- nothing positive comes out of it- I end up eating too much, not taking care of myself, doing nothing but numbing the pain I feel inside.
I drank all day yesterday to cure my hangover from the night before. 2 bottles of wine which started at 10:30 in the morning. Something about that just isn't right.
I'm up now hoping to grab some peace before the kids are up (2 and 5). I have no concrete plans for today: maybe some pilates which is probably the only exercise my body can handle as it recovers, a few errands to run and I've gotta get all the fall/winter clothes organized as summer has just recently left us here in Florida. On my list is also to continue reading Rational Recovery- I want to fully try it as a way to recover without AA. If it doesn't help I will definitely look elsewhere for added support as it's obvious I can't do this alone.
I am numb. For a while I convinced myself that I don't have a drinking problem- forget the "A" word, I'm not even going there.
But the truth is, I'm a much better person when I'm sober. I'm more spiritual, more energized, more motivated, a better Mom and wife, a better me.
Doesn't that sound like enough to make a person quit?
2 events coming up this week that I need to plan for: Date night with hubby is on Friday. His idea of date night is dinner and lots of drinks. I need to find something for us to do where we can connect without booze (this is rare for us which has been part of the problem these 5 years we've been married.)
Having people over for dinner Saturday- this will be easy because they are not big drinkers. The only trigger will be if DH decides to drink. I wish he wouldn't. I wish he would support me, knowing how long I've struggled and how often I've tried to stop. I know it's not his fault and sometime soon I am going to have to accept the fact that he cannot support me in this and that is OK. I know I'll get there.
Anyway- I look foward to getting to know you all. I will check in if I'm feeling tempted. Today is the only day I worry about because I usually drink to get over the way I feel from drinking the day before (because that makes a lot of sense.) But I do have a lot to do and I need to be on the road at 7 am tomorrow for work so it would be best to keep myself sober and focused on the positive.
I have so many things I want to change about my life, so many dreams about the person I want and need to be. Alcohol doesn't allow me to be any of it really. Now I just need to find the strength to stop...
It seems with every relapse, we come to a greater understanding of our addiction and how it impacts our lives and the lives of our loved ones. We can use this knowledge to stay on track and recover.
Please post as often as you need to! Welcome back :-)
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Minnetonka, MN
Posts: 155
Day....5! I had to think about it for a moment there. Still can't wait for that number to be higher.
I think I mentioned yesterday that I was going to a friend's birthday party where drinking would likely be involved, but I hadn't seen these friends in a long time and truly enjoyed their company, so I went anyway. I didn't drink anything, and that was great....what wasn't so great was how much grief I got for it. Maybe it was more that my friends were so surprised to see me not drinking...one of my friends kept on apologizing to me for having to be surrounded by drunk people and really thought I wasn't having any fun at all. I realize that, to my friends, drinking and having fun are very closely linked together. I really was the only person at this party who didn't drink at all. These friends are great people, but I'm thankful that there's a lot of separation between us and that it takes a special occasion to bring us together. They are definitely not the people I want to be hanging around right now.
But I am encouraged by the fact that I honestly didn't crave a drink at all, even being surrounded by drinks everywhere, a stocked fridge, a stocked deck outside, etc. And if it wasn't for the grief I was getting for not drinking, I would have said that I genuinely 100% enjoyed myself there.
I think I mentioned yesterday that I was going to a friend's birthday party where drinking would likely be involved, but I hadn't seen these friends in a long time and truly enjoyed their company, so I went anyway. I didn't drink anything, and that was great....what wasn't so great was how much grief I got for it. Maybe it was more that my friends were so surprised to see me not drinking...one of my friends kept on apologizing to me for having to be surrounded by drunk people and really thought I wasn't having any fun at all. I realize that, to my friends, drinking and having fun are very closely linked together. I really was the only person at this party who didn't drink at all. These friends are great people, but I'm thankful that there's a lot of separation between us and that it takes a special occasion to bring us together. They are definitely not the people I want to be hanging around right now.
But I am encouraged by the fact that I honestly didn't crave a drink at all, even being surrounded by drinks everywhere, a stocked fridge, a stocked deck outside, etc. And if it wasn't for the grief I was getting for not drinking, I would have said that I genuinely 100% enjoyed myself there.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2015
Posts: 2,031
Originally Posted by jazzfish
Sober sleep is much better, but a pinched nerve in my back wouldn't let me have it. Getting older seems to be like playing a game of Whack-a-mole with physical ailments. I just wish I could be 100% healthy for a while. Oh well, the bright side is that it is Sunday so I can take a few naps later on.
Looking forward to meeting the therapist this week. I wish there was an easy method for determining if a therapist was going to be a good match or not.
Looking forward to meeting the therapist this week. I wish there was an easy method for determining if a therapist was going to be a good match or not.
I was complaining to my brother about my ailments and he looked at me and said, "You're getting older, it's not going to get better." I think he meant physically, we're just getting older, but I know I'm not doing all I can to get myself healthy. I cannot drink. Period.
Drinking makes me lazy, fat, depressed, etc. That I can improve!
I went through 5 therapists before I found the right one. I like direct, in my face, no holds barred therapy and that's what I told the therapists. Give me homework, a book to read, help me help myself.
Please let us know how your session goes!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2015
Posts: 2,031
Originally Posted by Pelagic263
Checking in for day 2. Day 1 went a whole lot better than I would have expected, considering my "taper" had been 12 packs. Some extra BP meds, lots of vitamins, hibiscus tea (for BP). Seems to have worked so I will repeat today! Whew. I'm grateful it's going easy so far.
That will be the last day 1, period. My body and mind won't take any more, and I want to get back to living. My wife told me she's been apartment shopping, told me she wants to give me half what we owe on the house and walk away. It's all become very, very real and I hope I can repair some of this.
So I commit to day 2, no matter what. I can (hopefully) repair some of the damage once I'm in the clear, but today sobriety is priority #1. Let's all make it the highest priority.
Welcome sunflower. Together we can do this.
Have a great day one and all.
That will be the last day 1, period. My body and mind won't take any more, and I want to get back to living. My wife told me she's been apartment shopping, told me she wants to give me half what we owe on the house and walk away. It's all become very, very real and I hope I can repair some of this.
So I commit to day 2, no matter what. I can (hopefully) repair some of the damage once I'm in the clear, but today sobriety is priority #1. Let's all make it the highest priority.
Welcome sunflower. Together we can do this.
Have a great day one and all.
I'm on Day 2 as well and feel so much better today than I did yesterday. I am with you on making sobriety my priority...hopefully things will fall into place once we are thinking clearly and rationally.
Please post if you're struggling, Pelagic. There's so much support here!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2015
Posts: 2,031
Originally Posted by rah555
Day 7...thinking about stuff, my life, goals, etc. I am feeling aggravated with my husband. Underlying issues exist. I think he is aggravated that I don't want to go out to a local bar and watch football today. I don't care. I am staying home today, need to take care of myself.
Yes, take care of yourself. You can't control how others react and you can't let it get you down. Any special plans for taking care of yourself?
Better when never is never
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Wisconsin near Twin Cities
Posts: 1,745
Originally Posted by Optimist4ever57
I was complaining to my brother about my ailments and he looked at me and said, "You're getting older, it's not going to get better." I think he meant physically, we're just getting older, but I know I'm not doing all I can to get myself healthy. I cannot drink. Period.
Drinking makes me lazy, fat, depressed, etc.
Drinking makes me lazy, fat, depressed, etc.
I firmly believe I can make myself physically better than now, but I am at the age where the two roads are becoming clearer and harder to switch. I definitely want to go through life healthy.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2016
Posts: 110
Day 13 here and feeling ok. Stressed about looking for work and wondering if I have totally buggered myself by losing my last job 
I'll be 40 next month, living at home again and unemployed. Feeling kinda blue today but going to do my best to stay positive and just pray something suitable comes along sooner than later. As long as I stay positive, motivated and SOBER...something has to give. I hope.
I'll be 40 next month, living at home again and unemployed. Feeling kinda blue today but going to do my best to stay positive and just pray something suitable comes along sooner than later. As long as I stay positive, motivated and SOBER...something has to give. I hope.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2015
Posts: 2,031
Feeling so much better today, on Day 2. I got so much done yesterday around the house I was able to check some things off my list.
No special plans for today. More laundry, cleaning and some sewing Christmas presents. I do have to run to the store for a few things but will avoid the alcohol area as I don't want to tempt myself.
Thank you all for the support and kind words. I feel stronger today than I did yesterday and the depression is lifting.
Here's to a sober Day 2!
No special plans for today. More laundry, cleaning and some sewing Christmas presents. I do have to run to the store for a few things but will avoid the alcohol area as I don't want to tempt myself.
Thank you all for the support and kind words. I feel stronger today than I did yesterday and the depression is lifting.
Here's to a sober Day 2!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 593
Thanks, Optimist. Last day 2 for both of us!!
Thanks to all. Miramira depression comes back to me in sobriety, and some other stuff as well. We drink to avoid it, to bury it, but it's always there and we can get through it sober this time. We have to face it.
Stay positive Truthbetold. That's a big part of staying sober.
Thanks to all. Miramira depression comes back to me in sobriety, and some other stuff as well. We drink to avoid it, to bury it, but it's always there and we can get through it sober this time. We have to face it.
Stay positive Truthbetold. That's a big part of staying sober.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London, England
Posts: 7,057
Hi all.
I would like to join class. I just can't crack giving up for more than a day.
I am drinking a bottle of vodka a day!
Previously I have been to AA, great people but not for me. I have also attended a drug and alcohol clinic and am now seeing a counselor.
I was feeling so positive that I wouldn't drink this weekend made a plan of things to do but failed and did nothing.
I interested in AVRT but my AV is playing havoc plus loneliness and lack of support.
I would like to join class. I just can't crack giving up for more than a day.
I am drinking a bottle of vodka a day!
Previously I have been to AA, great people but not for me. I have also attended a drug and alcohol clinic and am now seeing a counselor.
I was feeling so positive that I wouldn't drink this weekend made a plan of things to do but failed and did nothing.
I interested in AVRT but my AV is playing havoc plus loneliness and lack of support.
Re-Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: USA
Posts: 7,909
Day 8. Week two starts now!
Work this evening. It'll probably be slow because of stupid football games. No other plans for the day.
25 days is awesome, LowSpark! Sorry yesterday was a rough one. Hope today is better. Remember SR is here 24/7. Post once a minute if that's what it takes to get through those rough moments.
Great job, bblackbirdflyy! Keep moving forward now.
You can't change the past, Miramira, but your future is much brighter without that constant poison of your addiction in it. Hang in there!
Glad you're back on the road to recovery with us, Sunflowerlife. There are tons of folks with long-term sobriety here on SR who have actively drinking spouses. As hard as it may be, your sobriety is not contingent on your husband's. Wishing you the best today. Stick close, post often, give the good folks here a chance to help you before you take that first drink next time.
Glad your sober weekend is going well, rah555. Congrats on wrapping up week one today!
I like the idea of a "few" naps, jazzfish. Sorry to hear about your pinched nerve, but hope you have a nice, relaxing Sunday.
You're not "getting" sober, Applekat. You ARE sober. Don't take that first drink and you'll stay that way.
Glad day 1 wasn't too rough on you, Pelagic. You're right to realize that first priority is recovery. Your wife hasn't made the move yet, she's just thinking about it. Keep doing the next right thing and I'm sure all will work out as it should.
And we're glad you're refusing to leave us, Optimist4ever57. You can do this. WE can do this! Thank you for all your wonderful support here today. And, by the way, I've found that a good ol' subtle middle finger wave or growl under my breath is entirely appropriate when I do have to pass by the poison aisle at the grocery store. The March 16 class has taken to calling it the "Casey salute."
If anyone starts to question my not drinking, Illuminate, I tend to believe it says more about their own issues/relationship with alcohol than it does about anything to do with me. Glad you made it through the party safe and sober. One day at a time, we've got this.
Congrats on day 13, Truthbetold76. Keep doing the next right thing, keep looking for that right job, and I'm sure it will find you. I know one thing for sure--a drink or ten sure as heck isn't the answer.
Welcome to the November Nobenders, Kaily! Stick close, post often, make this a regular part of your recovery plan. Drink lots of water today. Good news is you never have to feel this way again!
Lot of good, honest posts this morning but would still love to hear from others who haven't checked in yet today. Build up those accountability muscles!
I'm not going to take that first drink today no matter what. How about you?
Work this evening. It'll probably be slow because of stupid football games. No other plans for the day.
25 days is awesome, LowSpark! Sorry yesterday was a rough one. Hope today is better. Remember SR is here 24/7. Post once a minute if that's what it takes to get through those rough moments.
Great job, bblackbirdflyy! Keep moving forward now.
You can't change the past, Miramira, but your future is much brighter without that constant poison of your addiction in it. Hang in there!
Glad you're back on the road to recovery with us, Sunflowerlife. There are tons of folks with long-term sobriety here on SR who have actively drinking spouses. As hard as it may be, your sobriety is not contingent on your husband's. Wishing you the best today. Stick close, post often, give the good folks here a chance to help you before you take that first drink next time.
Glad your sober weekend is going well, rah555. Congrats on wrapping up week one today!
I like the idea of a "few" naps, jazzfish. Sorry to hear about your pinched nerve, but hope you have a nice, relaxing Sunday.
You're not "getting" sober, Applekat. You ARE sober. Don't take that first drink and you'll stay that way.
Glad day 1 wasn't too rough on you, Pelagic. You're right to realize that first priority is recovery. Your wife hasn't made the move yet, she's just thinking about it. Keep doing the next right thing and I'm sure all will work out as it should.
And we're glad you're refusing to leave us, Optimist4ever57. You can do this. WE can do this! Thank you for all your wonderful support here today. And, by the way, I've found that a good ol' subtle middle finger wave or growl under my breath is entirely appropriate when I do have to pass by the poison aisle at the grocery store. The March 16 class has taken to calling it the "Casey salute."
If anyone starts to question my not drinking, Illuminate, I tend to believe it says more about their own issues/relationship with alcohol than it does about anything to do with me. Glad you made it through the party safe and sober. One day at a time, we've got this.
Congrats on day 13, Truthbetold76. Keep doing the next right thing, keep looking for that right job, and I'm sure it will find you. I know one thing for sure--a drink or ten sure as heck isn't the answer.
Welcome to the November Nobenders, Kaily! Stick close, post often, make this a regular part of your recovery plan. Drink lots of water today. Good news is you never have to feel this way again!
Lot of good, honest posts this morning but would still love to hear from others who haven't checked in yet today. Build up those accountability muscles!
I'm not going to take that first drink today no matter what. How about you?
Member
Join Date: Nov 2016
Posts: 77
7th day
Caseyw you absolutely amaze me with your meticulous way of contacting everyone on this thread and encouraging them. You make it so personal for everyone and so supportive.
Well 7th day for me, wish sleep would improve. Feeling good otherwise, try to keep as busy as possible. I can tell I have more energy now. Still full of remorse for the years I wasted drinking.
On a more positive note may the day be beautiful. And for all if you struggling like me know that I support you, know how you feel and care for you. Stay strong, hold on and never let go. Peace. 😘
Well 7th day for me, wish sleep would improve. Feeling good otherwise, try to keep as busy as possible. I can tell I have more energy now. Still full of remorse for the years I wasted drinking.
On a more positive note may the day be beautiful. And for all if you struggling like me know that I support you, know how you feel and care for you. Stay strong, hold on and never let go. Peace. 😘
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
