Martin1

I usually hit the dangerous period quicker than you guys. I'm 11 days in and have had a couple of urges but nothing too bad.

I said I will post on here when it becomes troubling.

I actually did quit alcohol for five months when I was 20-21. I stopped because it was affecting my lifting gains. This week I'm going to get back into it.

tekink

this weekend has been harder for me also, i'm getting tired of my brain feeling like mush. I know that the thing that caused my head to feel this way isn't the way out. When I quit pain medication the head fog really got to me and I turned up the alcohol to make it go away, it caused me to turn my drinking up to 11.

a couple years ago my brother in law ended up in the hospital for a couple weeks. he has cirrhosis from drinking to much, it was scarey. His abdomen was filled with fluid that was leaking from his liver he nearly died. He's on medication now and will be for the rest of his life.

I don't want to put my wife through that with me.

He was able to quit drinking and has turned his life around.

Day 48 is almost done!

SoberRobster

Thank goodness it's Monday and the weekend is out of the way. So glad that there was no alcohol in my house and I managed not to relapse. Still it's another week and I have lots of things to keep me occupied so hopefully I won't get those cravings back. Day 38 for me - Good luck to all this week.

Dee74

for me it took me a little while to feel those fundamental things like peace, happiness and joy again.

I began to feel those things again after 3-4 months - a longer time than I imagined it would when I started but not too long when you consider I drank for 20 years.

I had a lot of underlying issues - a lot of 'reasons to drink' - and while being sober didn't solve those issues it did give me an emotional constancy to start dealing with them

D

HelenofTroy

Good morning folks.

Sorry to see so many struggling, and wishing you all ongoing strength and determination.

Martin, are you into weightlifting? I got heavily into working out when I quit drinking fifteen years ago. I think it was part giving me something to obsess over instead of the drinking and part mid life crisis lol. I have to say I looked amazing but when I started drinking again it all fell by the wayside. I do need to start getting physical again although I don't need it to become an obsession this time. Thor would be happy if I just got out for a daily walk with him.

Windancer I think you made a wise decision. You have made really positive changes and this is a good time in your life to allow yourself to selfishly focus on your own well-being. You are and should be your number one priority. I think we all want to help others and we can within reason but we can't do that when it means putting our own well-being at risk. You did great by recognizing that and correcting your situation right away.

I had a wonderful day with hubby yesterday. We had to put some chores on hold because of rain so we spent a relaxing afternoon testing out the surround system with Lord of the Rings. Then we had a fabulous dinner at one of our favourite restaurants. I often complain about how restaurant choices are basically down to the chain restaurants that are not much more than overpriced Mc'restaurants, but this particular one is an independent with great food. I didn't have any desire to have wine with my dinner and we had a good talk about where I am at with that. And it was really nice sharing a large bottle of Perrier with lemon and lime slices - I highly recommend it

I'm feeling a bit stressed over something that is beyond my control. Tonight is the strike deadline for the multi national company I am retired from. As a retiree I don't get a vote on the contract but the stakes are high and it could have a substantial negative impact on me. I would normally not be as concerned but from what I am reading on social media there are a lot of folks who are willing to burn down the ship. Like the U.S. election I will be so glad when this is done!

Have a good one everyone.

Windancer

Thank you Helen . It was hard for me as I know cutting ties would deeply upset this man. He spoke constantly of having no one to support him and feeling that everyone ran from him ... though it is clear the common denominator is him with all those relationships and if he lost his temper even remotely closely like he did with me several times with others I can understand why folks (and his family) have cut ties for their own health.

So, my ex contacted me last night wanting to get together to "sort some things out", "explain some things" and get "some answers". He sounded more like himself than he has in awhile. This is the close friend that I knew for 14 years, and found him in bed having an affair with another woman. This is the first time he has wanted to talk about it. He had a cocaine problem last I knew (this is new and uncharacteristic for him). I agreed to meet him today. in the early afternoon. It is now 2:00 and I only just heard from him which to me indicates that he was up all night last night getting drunk or doing coke or both. He apologized several times and now we are planning to meet up around 4 or 5. I know many people would tell me not to bother and just move on but I've known this man for 14 years. He was my best friend and the love of my life. I've barely spoken to him since I discovered the affair and if he has some things to say I want to hear them. I guess what happens when we talk will largely determine whether or not I'll engage with him at all in the future.

CuteNGayYay

Happy Halloween all. Bday 53. Wanted to check in as I missed yesterday. Went to a Jackolantern carving show was pretty cool. hope everyone had a good weekend.

HelenofTroy

Windancer there's nothing wrong with telling him you are taking a six months full break to focus on yourself and your own well being and he is welcome to do the same, and in six months time if there is still something there between the two of you to be friends or more then you will see at that time. I know you have been strong but it is still a vulnerable time for you. And with that type of history between you they can be just so damn charming even against our better judgement! Just sayin. Wishing you the best no matter what you decide.

SomeSortOfHuman

Hi all,

So it's two months for me today (I quit on the very last day of August, so thought it made more sense to join the Sept class with other newbies). I should probably be feeling a bit more celebratory than I am - like many on here, I am in a tough patch. I drank to block out a lot of things that I am unhappy and conflicted about, so it's harder to hide from those things now. I don't know what I'm going to do to make changes in my life, but I suppose sobriety has to be a good foundation to figure that out. While I was drinking, I was just pressing "pause" on my life.

Hope you've all had a good start to the week.

x

SoberRobster

Feeling much better today - I was glad to go back to work after the cravings from the weekend. Kept busy all day and played tennis tonight. Have a good week everybody.

SeaOfSerenity

Hi all,

It was my birthday today. First I can remember that hasnt revolved around drink.

I went bowling with my brothers and father. Only thing is my dad is an alcoholic as well. He turned up hammered, stumbling and mumbling. Kind of embarrassing and annoying as you cant properly communicate with him and he gets frustrated when people give up trying.

Not sure how to go about my relationship with him as I can see it being too hard now I'm not drinking., before we would drink together so wouldn't see it like I do now,

Anyway another day sober, cant complain. I hope everyone is doing well today.

Dee74

Happy birthday SeaOfSerenity

I'm really sorry about your dad - but my advice is focus on yourself and your own recovery for now...it will help you massively in dealing with loved one's problems down the track.

D

HelenofTroy

Happy birthday SOS

Windancer

I actually didn't even think of that as being an option, taking a break and then seeing where things are at. That might very well be the wisest thing for me to do. The meeting went ok I guess. It was an attempt to clear the air and for him to explain the situation he is in. But seeing how stressed out the whole thing made me and how it just brought back all those horrible, terrible raw feelings of betrayal just goes to show I don't really need this drama ... especially when he isn't exactly bending over backwards in remorse and telling me how much he loves me etc etc. He is still confused and doesn't know what the hell he wants, and he is about to completely lose me and I know that if he does he will regret that very deeply. I'm super close to cutting him out of my life. But the idea of taking a "time out" with it does seem like a wise compromise. This time I am putting my Recovery first (as opposed to damn near last in the past).

Windancer

Happy birthday SOS ... that is awesome!!!

SomeSortOfHuman

Happy Birthday, Sea of Serenity. It must be very difficult to deal with a parent who has a drinking problem when you're in early recovery yourself, but I think Dee's advice sounds spot on. Well done for getting through your birthday without drinking - that's a big milestone!

HelenofTroy

Good morning folks.

Day 12 here. I have good news - my union got a tentative agreement last night. It still has to be voted on but I am confident that they got the best possible deal and that the membership will pass it. My pension is safe for a few more years lol Yesterday was a write-off for me. I spent the whole day following social media and the arguments back and forth on the related contract issues. Ugh! I was joking with my best friend/former drinking buddy (who is two years sober) that it's enough to drive you to drink! lol (said in jest only) So today I need to get busy/productive.

Have a good one everyone.

Martin1

Yeah, I started bodybuilding when I was 17, by the time I was 21 I looked great. I was underweight as well so took a lot of work to start seeing a change. I've tried many times to get back into it but once I'm in a routine I end up drinking and bodybuilding and alcohol definitely do not mix. I occasionally drank when I was lifting but not enough to affect my gains.

Martin1

Two weeks

Windancer

Greetings!
I felt kinda grumpy and short most of the day. It didn't go as planned ... this morning I discovered my senior gelding (and first horse) has really slashed his knee open. So most of the day was spent looking after him and going to get supplies to keep the wound clean and properly bandaged. It is tricky to wrap the knee of a horse. But thank the Creator he was here for me to care for instead of at my ex's farm. I was planning to clean and tidy my apartment today but my favorite boy needed me so that is ok.

I was really tired, still grumpy for no reason and did NOT feel like going to a meeting but I spoke to my Sponsor anyway because I have been losing Recovery momentum of late and I want to put a stop to that before I relapse and end up in the pits of hell again. So off to a meeting I went and I felt better after (even in my messy apartment). Better yet ... the knee bandage was still firmly in place on Chance's knee at night check and he was quiet and happy eating hay, so I was glad for that.

I think the lesson for me right now is to "Let go and let God" as they say. Stop fighting life so hard. When things don't go as planned, it's ok ... go with the flow. Because of this I think finally getting to Step 3 of the 12 Steps will be great. I am meeting with my Sponsor tomorrow to finally formerly finish Step 2.

So all in all I am doing well. I've had feelings of missing my ex ..., the one that I had an extremely toxic relationship with. I hope he is well and wonder if he hates me. I think it's because I am still single and sometimes lonely and I am not used to being alone. Getting back into the swing of frequent meeting will help fill that void I expect.

I hope everyone is doing well!
49 sober days today ....I think, anyway. tekink??? lol