Class of April 2015 Part 11
 

The last part:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...part-10-a.html

Thanks for the new thread Anna!

I came out very extremely future oriented, which is generally me. However, it doesn't seem to explain my addiction like some of the other personality types do.

Good for you SG.
I was very future focused for most my life. I ended up having a massive mid-life crisis. Which is common for future focused folks, so I read.

That crisis was the beginning of my utter self destruction. I began to hate my marriage. I started dating someone who expressed interest in me. The marriage fell apart.

Watch yourself. Be sure to schedule time with for yourself and your family often.

Morning all!

Hope today finds you well ;)

Good advice Inc. I guess my alcoholism was my mid life crisis.Perhaps seeing all those years of planning everything out not leading me to where I thought I should be contributed to my increased drinking. I would rather have had a nice car or a pretty woman than become an alcoholic. I didn't plan for that to happen.

I had a breakthrough yesterday.

I was cleaning out old vitamin bottles and found a bud of weed my addict left for me to find later.

My initial reaction: "sweet!!"

I was alone for the day. Certainly one bud wouldn't hurt.

I set it aside and had a talk with myself. I played it through. Played through that I would feel" hungover " after. That I would want more. I rationalized that I didn't want it at all until I found it. Then I got mad at my addict for setting me up like that.

I flushed it. The best part? I was happy I did. No internal battle. No remorse. Didnt think about pot for the rest of the day. Just flushed it and forgot it.

That is so cool!

I actually have the weekend off! I only had to ask off 9 months ago. Besides Father's Day here, it's also my son's birthday tomorrow. Can't believe my oldest is now 15.

Lots of family coming over today. Looks like great weather.

I had to go buy a six pack of my Dad's favorite beer yesterday. Though I have a lot left over from our Memorial Day party, there was none of his favorite. It is the least I could do for Dad.

I can't tell you all how funny it was buying a six pack of beer. I probably have not done that since college days. I always bought by the case.

Happy Father's Day weekend!

Have a great weekend SG.

6pack vs case: that should have been my first clue. Beer to liqour my next clue. By the time I was buying 1/2 gallons, I new I was in trouble. Or at least that little tiny voice just started asking questions.

Beautiful day here too. Made myself do day 4 of 30 day challange even though I didn't feel like it. . At all. Once again, I'm glad I did.

Hi Guys - hope everyones doing well :)

D

Hi Dee. We are rocking it!

Doing well thanks Dee ;)

Hi everyone and Dee!
I am extremely happy I completed my 5km run yesterday with a finish time of 28.10. I tell you, the whole vibe was amazing...I thought it was brilliant that they had the theme from Rocky blasting for the marathoners. When it came time for my run to start I was pumped!

I am doing those time perspective tests this morning, really sounds interesting. My self evaluation is that I am all over the place. I focus on the big picture, but then tend to feel overwhelmed with the task at hand, so to help with that I break down my large goals into smaller goals. Just to get the sense of accomplishment everyday! Sure I want to go to the top of my company, but first, I need to do this today. I find even reading has gone to the wayside with my full schedule and focus on work, so now I am reading short stories. Don't need to feel stressed about the unread book on my dresser anymore! It's the little things. I'm not sure is this is part of time perspective though...I'll read up on the links provided.

Take Care...you should see the waves on the lake today. HUGE! it's so windy.

Cauli..Congrats on the 5k!! Way to go girl. What an amazing transformation you have had. I'm so happy for you!!

I have redirected my exercise program to weight lifting to gain weight. I weighed myself for the first time in a long time the other day. I know I lost a lot of weight over the past year, but I was shocked to see I am at the very lowest weight within the healthy range for my height.

I am now on day 4 of a 30 day workout challange and it's already getting hard. Some of the exercises I have to break into pieces to accomplish them.

I am still going to run/walk, but not as many days. Until recently, I was mostly running with working out 1-2 times a week. Now I am going to workout at least 3 days a week and run on my off days. I can't begin to explain how much better I feel.

So....
I live in NE Ohio. We have not had a sports championship here in 50years. Last night, our basketball team with the lead from LeBron James won the NBA Title! They were also the first team in history to win the title after having a 3-1 game deficit going into Game 5.

What an amazing experience. I set up a TV on the back patio and had the suround sound blaring. Had a nice fire going too. I was with my Fiance and her youngest daughter. During the game, I expained to her how long it's been since we've had a chamopionship, how LeBron had a lifetime goal of bringing one home. I explained how Cleveland thought they were jinxed and some of the huge close calls we had that were taken away by plays so outrageous, they were named. Like "The Shot" by Michael Jordan with seconds left on the clock effectively taking away a championship from Clevelend. Or "The Drive" in which Elway lead the Broncos on a 98yard drive in 5minutes to tie the Cleveland Browns. The Broncos won in OT.

Somehow...the clock ticked down with Cleveland on top! We avoided another outrageous play like "The block" or "The Shot II"!! We screamed at the top of our voices and cheered. The neighborhood responded in kind. Then we shot off fireworks for an hour after the game together.

It was an amazing experience.

Congrats on the championship Inc! I watched a lot of that series and it was amazing. That LeBron stop on the lay up changed the game at the end.

Back to work after a super busy weekend. Had a big family Father's Day/Birthday party for my family Saturday. We then got a big meal together Sunday and visited my father in law who is in a facility trying to deal with dementia. Last night I went to see a bunch of musicians that I have been seeing in one form or another since the mid 1980's. It was great going to a show and not drinking. My last trip to this particular venue 13 years ago found me so drunk that I passed out in the second set and don't remember being driven home. I miss seeing live music, but it takes someone really special for me to want to go out and deal with all the drunks!

Have a great day all!

Nice win SG. Sounds like a good time!

Had a WT__ moment last night.

I was doing my 30 day fitness challange in the living room. I was jumping, pushing, squeezing, pulling, yanking.... Looked very much like a good session with the GF.

My dog started getting interested in what I was doing. She barked at me like she does when I wrestle with kids. Well, I was doing push ups and next thing you know she's pushing her nose into my butt. Yes.. Pushing her nose INTO my butt. We're way past the point of smelling my butt. Which, I wouldn't blame her for as by this point, I was sweating some serious manhood.

Then the real WT__ moment came... She was humping me! She... As in girl... Was humping me.

"What the fudge! " I yell at her. She just walked away like she was in trouble with her head down, looking at me through her peripheral. She sat in an awkward position which appeared as though she was pressing her_____ into the floor.

Now I was feeling bad. She's all hot and bothered. I guess I couldn't blame her. After all, I must have been emitting some serious manhood essence.

Hey guys! Good to hear you are all keeping well. All good with me. Just really busy as we're winding up the academic year in Spain this week. Phew!!!

Congrats on completing the run Cauli! You have come so far in your time here.

I too am finding almost no time to read. I have a vacation coming up soon where I hope to catch up on some long overdue reading.

Have a great day all!

test test

LOL! I keep retyping my post and losing it! Hense the test test!
Long story short! Keep on keeping on gang, it sounds like everyone is having a great week. Amp, you must be excited that the year is coming to a close. My son has 1 class room day left before it's all parties and waterslides to end the school year, and my daughter received her high school diploma last night!

I miss OMD. Sent a pm. Can't go long without his words of wisdom.

Yes, it is a relief to finish the classes though now all the maintenance and admin work kicks in! Phew! Congrats btw on the 5 mile run! Great acheivement!

I've been thinking the same but I'm confident he's fine. I've been lazy about posting recently. Having to make myself sometimes. Nothing personal of course!!! It's just that I think less about drinking now so posting on SR is not always the first thing that comes to mind when I fire up my PC or check my phone. Maybe the same thing for OMD?

Spent the afternoon and evening burning yard waste around my burn barrel. It was on my very own day one that I spent the day listening to music while working a burn barrel. Hard to believe sometimes how long ago that seems today.

So I've finally gotten off my butt and applied to more jobs. Got two 1st interviews lined up.

Exercise has made a huge difference for me. It's nice to be on a roll.

As one who over analyzes and things long about things, I've been putting more emphasis on just doing it.

My new name is Action Jackson.

Have a great weekend.
AJ

Hi everyone,
Let me first say sorry for not being in touch. I haven't drifted away or forgot about my friends on here - just had one thing after another, unfortunately. I appreciated your PM Inc, thank you. I have been working like a dog and then about to post but not able to because I was interrupted for whatever reason. Have collapsed into bed each night and then up at daybreak to do it all again. Things have been a bit hectic, but you probably already spotted that's how things get for me from time to time.

So I am still here! I am so happy everyone is doing well. I am blessed because things are well for me too. I am mentally in a good place, even when fake drinking is a necessary part of my day to win business. (You heard it all before, me having to be out with people who insist on drinking to cement the relationship. I used to believe that crap). Anyway, who cares, I see it as part of the job and maybe they'll quit too some day - they should. Got friends who have aged a lot in the last year but I am looking younger, seriously! Like the booze didn't finish me off despite my best efforts. Amazing. And the exercise - well I am now utterly addicted to that but I have not been able to do much over the last couple of weeks. But I feel great because I am not drinking! Blood pressure perfect, despite all the stress...:)

I am going to write more when I am less exhausted. I also really need to kick the sugar. More on that later.

Best wishes
OMD

Good to hear from you OMD.
It's funny. Now that you mention it, I look younger too!

Glad things are going well OMD and Inc!

I hope your situation plays out more clearly Amp in the coming months. I think there is a lot of second guessing going on now and I think the election would turn out differently if people had a second chance this week. I think a lot of people voted to leave thinking there would be no way it would happen. I read that 10 members of the Labour shadow government resigned over the weekend. So much for England being our bastion of security in Europe. Worries me about the US this fall.

I have a glorious and badly needed 13 day break from work starting right now.It's been exactly a year since I had a week off. Going to see another concert tomorrow night and then a week at the beach starting Saturday. I need a mental and emotional recharge. Work has really been draining me and I have had the occasional "wouldn't a cold beer or glass of wine be nice now" thought enter my head, only to be quickly shooed away. At the concert I was at last week, I watched one guy continually throw up all over his car for the better part of a couple minutes. After the show, walking back to my car, no less than four people just staggered and fell to the concrete like animals hit with a tranquilizer gun. No way do I want to go back there once again. Seeing alcoholism rear it's ugly head in real life is different than sitting in front of my computer day dreaming about the good times. Always remember the reality of drinking is far different than the fantasy of drinking.

I'd agree with that. The fantasy of drinking being better than the reality, I mean.

I also have the occansional thought of "wouldn't a cold beer just hit the spot" but I try to meet these head on, reminding myself of just how bad my life was before I finally kicked the demon drink. In July 2014 I managed to stop for 6 weeks. I gave myself an ultimatum about moderation and started again with the premise of just an occasional social glass here and there. 8 months of chaos ensued. No way back.

I am deeply concerned about the situation in the UK. The closet racists spilling out into the streets, the potential fragmentation of the UK after 300 years and the uncertainty of the markets. Google reports unprecedented numbers of people from the UK googling "what is the EU?"... AFTER THE REFERENDUM. A lot of people have voted with their hearts instead of their heads, paying more head to slogans about national pride and manipulated statistics than actual facts. I think people have no idea what they have unleashed and I am actually quite scared and think the situation is spiralling out of control.

Anyway, wishing all you guys well!