jobei

My AV came at me so hard yesterday. Towards the end of a long work week I was feeling good because I survived another crazy week at work, money in my pocket etc. That was always the time that I would drink the most. Part "reward", part coming down from the adrenaline of working hard. My head was full of drinking thoughts. Now that I'm feeling good physically and have helped my financial situation the AV gets loud. I just came home and got into bed... sleep is my new escape when THE AV flares up. So then (kind of funny) I had a very vivid drinking dream and I woke up in a stupor! Did I drink??? What the hell?! After a few minutes I figured it out... and counted my blessings... what a relief. At the same time I see how it went down last night. My AV chased me into my dreams, like some Freddy Krueger stuff... scary indeed. I'm staying highly vigilant today. Focused on this 24 hour block. It will be 2 months tuesday, I just can't go back in the hole!!!

OldTomato

Well done for coming back Del and CNGY, it's not easy. Keep trying new recovery methods.

I hope you feel better Lee and Violet, sounds like you've both got good outlooks on your situations. You guys are doing great.

SansaS

Sounds like a good plan PHRD. To be honest, giving up the coffee has been one of the best things I've ever done. I was getting crazy anxious about 2-3pm every afternoon. When I skip the coffee in the morning, I don't get it...and getting anxious at 3pm is what leads to wanting wine at 4pm, I've found. Sorry I'm whinging so much about my weight. I guess I just always thought that the reason I've been carrying extra weight (I'm 30 pounds overweight) is because of all the wine.

SansaS

I have been having full on drinking dreams too, jobei. How much relief do you feel when you wake up and realise it's just a dream?!?!

jobei

You got that right! It has been going through my workplace like the literal plague it is! I was sick for a month! Bad stuff!

I find rewarding myself for not drinking is essential in my recovery. Helps reinforce positive behavior and create a new habit that I would miss if I was drinking. Any ideas of what you will get??

jobei

Same relief I've had after waking up from a nightmare and realizing that I'm safe!!

OldTomato

Find something to distract yourself with jobei. I find it helpful to go out for a walk without taking any money when my AV's acting up. The feelings have usually died down after an hour. Are you still living with your brother?

jobei

So coffee is a natural antioxidant! One cup a day minus large amounts of sweetener is supposed to be just fine for ya! Of course if you can't have just one I understand completely giving it up.

jobei

Oops missed this. Congrats on giving up the coffee!!

OldTomato

I had a series of colds and then flu not that long ago. I would like to stay healthy for a little while now please.

I'm going to be restocking my nail varnish along with some new colours and buying some nice bath stuff. Trust me, it's very exciting for me.

jobei

Yes I have lots of distractions luckily and I don't have to do too much today, just need to stay focused and not stray in my thoughts. It's a lot of work staying sober and everyone likes to.be lazy, especially me! Just can't go that route. There's so much out there still for me, if I give myself a chance.

Yup still living in this crappy city with my bro and his gf. We pretty much just go our separate ways though and it's not too bad. Interesting that my AV isn't strong at home where there is lots of easily accessible booze. It has come more when I'm out of the house!

jobei

Pamper pamper!! I like it! I buy collectibles on ebay, nothing huge just small things that I can associate with my sobriety! I can look at them and know I wouldn't have them if I was drinking!

OldTomato

You've done so well to get this far jobei, you're doing great and you're a real inspiration, keep going! Sobriety opens you up to a world of opportunities. Drinking does the exact opposite.

amazingjoy

Hi everyone, I caught up on all the posts this morning but am on my phone so i can't respond as I would have liked.

Glad to see everyone here and posting. How are you today Del?

Cute, it's so great you are right back in the fight!

Glad you are feeling better already PHRD...sounds like you still need to take it easy.

SansaS, I'm frustrated about weight too...how u gained a couple pounds desire 315 minutes of cardio last week (Tae Bo, Couch 2 5K and Treadclimber) I have no clue?

The additional 150-300 calories in sweets on a few days shouldn't be anything compared to the drinking calories!

Oh well, I am going to just try to keep at it and meet my minimum goal of 180 minutes...

Went to a "grown up" movie last night (which is very uncommon...) and saw Deadpool...funny...I loved the Liam Neeson jokes!

jobei

You have done very well too Tomato. Makes me happy!

Outonthetiles

SansaS, a psychic vampire is prolly a negative person..someone who always wants something, always has drama, always using other people.... that's how I see it.

CnGY, I'm glad you're here and posting. As long as you're here, that's the critical thing.

Coffee, I'm drinking more of it than I ever have before, and I'm somewhat addicted, but I'll deal with it as I get my sobriety well under control.

I think people are experiencing what I am...that sense of complacency, which I definitely have, too.

Badger07

Hello all. Just checking in. Busy this weekend. I will catch up later. With hope you are all doing well.

OldTomato

Hope all is well Badger!

True story OOTT, sobriety comes first - especially in these early days.

Thank you jobei, hang in there.

I saw Deadpool with my sister Amazingjoy, it was brilliant! I hear they're going to be making a 2nd one.

Outonthetiles

My weight is going in the right direction, but mostly because I've been involved in a workweek running challenge last week. I ran every night after work and that helped.

PHRD

Sansa the thing with weight too is that it actually adds on over time and then takes a long time to drop as well. One or two pounds a week is healthy and you should have that easily with the booze calories. Amazing you are adding muscle weight. Better to measure yourself than weigh yourself if you are working out. K Im taking a nap. Actually got out of the house today and picked up a few new birdfeeders and food. Cleaned a tiny bit. That was enough for one day for me with the evil virus hanging on!