Class of April 2016 Support Thread Part 1
Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2016
Posts: 778
Originally Posted by amp123 
Hey guys. I just thought I'd drop in to say hi. I got sober in April last year and a lot of that was down to the support I got here in SR. My April 2015 group has been huge support and we kind of pulled each other through those first few days, weeks and months. I also find a lot of support in the one year and under group which I heartily recommend. The month group is great because everyone is kind of going through the same kind of stuff at the same time, but it's good to mix it up in the "Undies" group because you meet people who are a bit ahead of you and a bit behind so there is a lot of shared wisdom.
I'd just like to congratulate all of you on getting on board. Time to face the demons. It's a roller coaster but there are a lot of successes here. Hold on to your hats!
I'd just like to congratulate all of you on getting on board. Time to face the demons. It's a roller coaster but there are a lot of successes here. Hold on to your hats!
I have a feeling this is going to be a great class.
Quit 4/17/15
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Pa
Posts: 15,154
Originally Posted by stillsleeping
Hi all,
After a year of drinking at weekends and a couple of months of drinking every day, I've realised that I'm waiting to hit some sort of bottom before being ready to quit again. Which is about the most stupid thing I can think of, especially now I see it written down.
It's a beautiful spring day here. I don't want to waste another year like I've wasted this one. I'm in. Nice to meet you all
xxx
After a year of drinking at weekends and a couple of months of drinking every day, I've realised that I'm waiting to hit some sort of bottom before being ready to quit again. Which is about the most stupid thing I can think of, especially now I see it written down.
It's a beautiful spring day here. I don't want to waste another year like I've wasted this one. I'm in. Nice to meet you all
xxx
Member
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Spain
Posts: 2,004
Originally Posted by stargazer016
Stillsleeping, there is no need to hit rock bottom in order to quit. Don't let those couple of months of drinking everyday turn into 33 years of drinking every day like I did. Stop now and don't waste another single day! Life is pretty incredible alcohol free.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 1,422
Hello lovely people, thanks for all the welcomes.
D'you know what I realised about the rock bottom thing? The first time I quit (I just realised was exactly 4 years ago and 1 day, jeez...) I really was rock bottom. Drunk out of my brains every night, cocaine, much too much cocaine, was close to losing my job and god knows what else.
This time, not nearly so bad. A really half-assed attempt to push myself to the point where I don't have any choice BUT to quit. Because quitting while I don't quite have to is much, much harder. One more night on the booze? Sure, why not? the hangover only lasts until early afternoon and it's not like I'm doing anything in the morning that can't wait.
What an a-hole.
Snap out of it girl. Your life is literally halfway over now. Don't waste any more of it.
Just like all of you have been saying!
I agree - this is going to be a nice class xxxx
D'you know what I realised about the rock bottom thing? The first time I quit (I just realised was exactly 4 years ago and 1 day, jeez...) I really was rock bottom. Drunk out of my brains every night, cocaine, much too much cocaine, was close to losing my job and god knows what else.
This time, not nearly so bad. A really half-assed attempt to push myself to the point where I don't have any choice BUT to quit. Because quitting while I don't quite have to is much, much harder. One more night on the booze? Sure, why not? the hangover only lasts until early afternoon and it's not like I'm doing anything in the morning that can't wait.
What an a-hole.
Snap out of it girl. Your life is literally halfway over now. Don't waste any more of it.
Just like all of you have been saying!
I agree - this is going to be a nice class
xxxx
Member
Join Date: Mar 2015
Posts: 262
I joined sr last year, and I definitely have not been sober this whole time. Here I am, again. and staying sober feels like it's completely unattainable. I've been blacking out consistently every week. I don't mean to. I tell myself I'm going to have one drink and that's it, and it never ever turns out that way. Apparently, last night I fell and hit my head. No recollection of that. Last week I blacked out, got kicked out of a concert and luckily made it back to my hotel safely. I have no idea how to beat this and I'm feeling pretty low. I can't talk to my husband bc he's sick of me, and I just don't know what to do anymore. I don't feel like I'll ever have control over it. It's just too hard. Today is day 1, again. I've never made it passed 14.. And right now my hopes aren't high that I'll make it this time. I'm sorry, I know everyone on here is positive and excited about their sobriety but right now I don't feel that way. I would drink again right now if I could. I don't know how I'm going to do it this time. I hate who I am, and who I've become. My whole life I've hated myself and I guess that's why I turned to booze. I'm sorry, I'm just feeling miserable. Thanks for being here SR.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 154
Hi all. I am back again...didn't even last a week when I committed to the March 2016 class. Sigh. Day 1 for me.....again.
I will do more of an intro later on. Busy day ahead and I have to get going here. Need to go clean the offices I clean for extra cash, then grocery shopping, house cleaning, laundry....and finally I need to put in some solid hours for a midterm exam I am writing tomorrow morning. Wont be anytime for drinking today anyways......
I will do more of an intro later on. Busy day ahead and I have to get going here. Need to go clean the offices I clean for extra cash, then grocery shopping, house cleaning, laundry....and finally I need to put in some solid hours for a midterm exam I am writing tomorrow morning. Wont be anytime for drinking today anyways......
Member
Join Date: Dec 2015
Posts: 451
Good morning. I have read through all of the April class posts so far and it is nice to meet all of you.
I would like to join this class too. I started in January and moved to the February class but drank in March so I'm with Paix Amour and following her lead in joining the April class.
I'm on day 13 now (my 3rd time around). When I get to day 16 I will have made it farther than ever before. My short term goal is to make it to the end of April which will be 40 days and then I will make another goal from there.
I'm adjusting my plans and tools and finding out that for me, setting what I believe to be "attainable" goals seems to help. At first it was one day at a time but I believe I can really make it to this new goal after learning from my mistakes in Feb/March.
I'm also trying to post more here on SR (I read a lot but I'm kind of private and feel timid to post so I'm trying to get beyond that). :-)
I would like to join this class too. I started in January and moved to the February class but drank in March so I'm with Paix Amour and following her lead in joining the April class.
I'm on day 13 now (my 3rd time around). When I get to day 16 I will have made it farther than ever before. My short term goal is to make it to the end of April which will be 40 days and then I will make another goal from there.
I'm adjusting my plans and tools and finding out that for me, setting what I believe to be "attainable" goals seems to help. At first it was one day at a time but I believe I can really make it to this new goal after learning from my mistakes in Feb/March.
I'm also trying to post more here on SR (I read a lot but I'm kind of private and feel timid to post so I'm trying to get beyond that). :-)
Member
Join Date: Dec 2015
Posts: 197
Hope everyone is having a hangover-free Sunday morning - maybe you have not yet hit Sunday morning or are far past it, depending on your time zone. I plan to spend this hangover free Sunday solidifying my plan, in writing.
My pattern is to decide things "aren't that bad" (loud AV) after day 5 or 6 - which is insane when I am honest with myself about how much alcohol has ruined things. I want to see the long-term benefits of sobriety (inside and out) at 90 days, 6 months, 1 year, etc. I have never given myself that opportunity, and feel like I am at a real crossroads. I am very, very fortunate to have a "high bottom" - but I am smart enough to know that if this doesn't end here and now, it won't be pretty and each time in the future trying to get sober will be harder. From SR, I now understand 100% that this disease is progressive and that "functioning alcoholism" is just a stage of alcoholism, and not a type.
Don't get me wrong - I wouldn't say that my alcoholism is "functional" at this point, but I have been saved from a lot of consequences, just on sheer luck. I am not pressing that luck again.
My pattern is to decide things "aren't that bad" (loud AV) after day 5 or 6 - which is insane when I am honest with myself about how much alcohol has ruined things. I want to see the long-term benefits of sobriety (inside and out) at 90 days, 6 months, 1 year, etc. I have never given myself that opportunity, and feel like I am at a real crossroads. I am very, very fortunate to have a "high bottom" - but I am smart enough to know that if this doesn't end here and now, it won't be pretty and each time in the future trying to get sober will be harder. From SR, I now understand 100% that this disease is progressive and that "functioning alcoholism" is just a stage of alcoholism, and not a type.
Don't get me wrong - I wouldn't say that my alcoholism is "functional" at this point, but I have been saved from a lot of consequences, just on sheer luck. I am not pressing that luck again.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 3,403
Just catching up on everyone's posts and I really relate to all of them. I have tried to quit so many times that I have lost count but one thing I know is that I am so sick of who I am when I drink. I am determined to control this addiction I have
Member
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Spain
Posts: 2,004
Some very good posts here. A lot of sincerity and honesty going on. I think, Strangeangel, that everyone who has been through this knows that there are times when you feel you're not going to make it.
When a family member died last May, I was a month into my journey. At that point I was convinced that I wouldn't be able to make it without a drink. But I did. I wasn't going to let the AV make things even worse.
For any of you who may not know (I certainly didn't this time last year), AV stands for "addicted voice". You'll hear the term quite a bit round here. It's like in the old movies where a character's conscience is represented by a little Angel on one shoulder (which is your rational voice) and the Devil on the other which is your addicted voice. After a while, when you tune in, you get to recognise AV for what it is. He's the one who says "Oh **** this, let's have some FUN!" or "You can't do this. No way. Might as well have a drink" or sometimes "You've done such a good job that you DESERVE a drink". Once you recognise that guy for who he is then you can beat him.
I think EVERYONE can beat this. We have a disease but we can cure ourselves. We just need to want it enough. Read and post on SR. Find face to face support. Don't give up. I remember days where I would only be able to commit to not drinking for an hour at a time and reevaluating time and again. Remember to reach out if that happens and know that the hard times so eventually ease off.
Take care!
When a family member died last May, I was a month into my journey. At that point I was convinced that I wouldn't be able to make it without a drink. But I did. I wasn't going to let the AV make things even worse.
For any of you who may not know (I certainly didn't this time last year), AV stands for "addicted voice". You'll hear the term quite a bit round here. It's like in the old movies where a character's conscience is represented by a little Angel on one shoulder (which is your rational voice) and the Devil on the other which is your addicted voice. After a while, when you tune in, you get to recognise AV for what it is. He's the one who says "Oh **** this, let's have some FUN!" or "You can't do this. No way. Might as well have a drink" or sometimes "You've done such a good job that you DESERVE a drink". Once you recognise that guy for who he is then you can beat him.
I think EVERYONE can beat this. We have a disease but we can cure ourselves. We just need to want it enough. Read and post on SR. Find face to face support. Don't give up. I remember days where I would only be able to commit to not drinking for an hour at a time and reevaluating time and again. Remember to reach out if that happens and know that the hard times so eventually ease off.
Take care!
Last edited by Dee74; 04-03-2016 at 03:51 PM.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Santa Barbara, SoCal
Posts: 561
Hey guys its nice to meet you all.
Canguy, paix, and amazingjoy - I too have joined many classes. I joined in 2012 stating I think I might have a problem but I didnt do anything about it... One month later I got my DUI. Once again even that wasn't a sign of a problem! I was 24 then, I am 28 now and its only gotten worse. I turned into a train wreck but I am hopeful that this time around will be better.
Strangeangel, last friday I felt the same as you did. I went on a massive dangerous vodka binge. My mom was so upset with me. Its day 8 for me (the longest ive been sober in years) and I feel great. Every time I have a little bit of anxiety, I tell myself its okay because at least I havent been drinking. I feel relief immediately.
My current struggle is this: I lost my job in a prestigious restaurant because of my drinking. I was there for two years. I made enough money to support myself in santa Barbara (super expensive housing).
At the time I took this as a sign to leave the industry because it entails a lot of cocktails, wine, beer. It helps to be able to describe the wines and pairing them etc. It doesnt help because I love wine.
Unfortunately I cant make it at a regular job. I stayed out of trouble but im broke. So I started a new job yesterday at an italian restaurant. I told them I dont drink and I even poured out a "taste" that my trainer told me I could have.
I'll be dealing with these triggers often and I need to know how to handle it. My AV was saying... just one glass every night at the end of your shift, you need to know the wines, etc.
What helps me is my bf asks me every day if I drank and I feel really proud to report that I didnt.
And I hope this thread helps me too
Happy sober sunday
Canguy, paix, and amazingjoy - I too have joined many classes. I joined in 2012 stating I think I might have a problem but I didnt do anything about it... One month later I got my DUI. Once again even that wasn't a sign of a problem! I was 24 then, I am 28 now and its only gotten worse. I turned into a train wreck but I am hopeful that this time around will be better.
Strangeangel, last friday I felt the same as you did. I went on a massive dangerous vodka binge. My mom was so upset with me. Its day 8 for me (the longest ive been sober in years) and I feel great. Every time I have a little bit of anxiety, I tell myself its okay because at least I havent been drinking. I feel relief immediately.
My current struggle is this: I lost my job in a prestigious restaurant because of my drinking. I was there for two years. I made enough money to support myself in santa Barbara (super expensive housing).
At the time I took this as a sign to leave the industry because it entails a lot of cocktails, wine, beer. It helps to be able to describe the wines and pairing them etc. It doesnt help because I love wine.
Unfortunately I cant make it at a regular job. I stayed out of trouble but im broke. So I started a new job yesterday at an italian restaurant. I told them I dont drink and I even poured out a "taste" that my trainer told me I could have.
I'll be dealing with these triggers often and I need to know how to handle it. My AV was saying... just one glass every night at the end of your shift, you need to know the wines, etc.
What helps me is my bf asks me every day if I drank and I feel really proud to report that I didnt.
And I hope this thread helps me too
Happy sober sunday
Member
Join Date: Mar 2015
Posts: 262
I know I need a plan, but I just find them so daunting and I always fail. I think my plans going to have to be Antabuse so I can't even think about drinks. I'm in a real low right now. My marriage is a disaster and I just don't want to do life right now. I don't know how to keep going and to be positive. This cycle sucks and is so hard to break and I've tried so many times. I just don't have a lot of positive thought left. Any advice on how to keep going?
Member
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: USA
Posts: 2,332
Hi everyone,
My brother and sister in law came over this morning with their nephew. He is 2 and was tired and not happy, he cried a lot. They took their beer so it is gone now. They invited me over as they are grilling out in a couple of hours and I said I would go. I just got to thinking they will probaly be drinking. I will take something to drink with me and I think I will be ok. I am feeling pretty motivated still and I hope this feeling lasts for a while. It is day 1 for me. I hope everyone is doing well and having a good Sunday.
Jade - good luck at your new job. Great job pouring out the "taste"
amazingjoy - congrats on 13 days! I love your dog
bblackbirdflyy - thanks~ I completely understand drinking making you miserable but still running back to it, I've done it many times. I am hopeful this time it will stick for all of us.
strangeangel - I have felt like you describe so many times. I am glad you are here and keep posting. We are in this together.
Casey -I knew when I posted that I was missing the "first" drink and almost changed it. Thanks for checking in on our class
amp - thanks for your motivating posts
Enjoy the rest of your weekend everyone~
My brother and sister in law came over this morning with their nephew. He is 2 and was tired and not happy, he cried a lot. They took their beer so it is gone now. They invited me over as they are grilling out in a couple of hours and I said I would go. I just got to thinking they will probaly be drinking. I will take something to drink with me and I think I will be ok. I am feeling pretty motivated still and I hope this feeling lasts for a while. It is day 1 for me. I hope everyone is doing well and having a good Sunday.
Jade - good luck at your new job. Great job pouring out the "taste"
amazingjoy - congrats on 13 days! I love your dog
bblackbirdflyy - thanks~ I completely understand drinking making you miserable but still running back to it, I've done it many times. I am hopeful this time it will stick for all of us.
strangeangel - I have felt like you describe so many times. I am glad you are here and keep posting. We are in this together.
Casey -I knew when I posted that I was missing the "first" drink and almost changed it. Thanks for checking in on our class
amp - thanks for your motivating posts
Enjoy the rest of your weekend everyone~
Member
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Spain
Posts: 2,004
Originally Posted by strangeangel
I know I need a plan, but I just find them so daunting and I always fail. I think my plans going to have to be Antabuse so I can't even think about drinks. I'm in a real low right now. My marriage is a disaster and I just don't want to do life right now. I don't know how to keep going and to be positive. This cycle sucks and is so hard to break and I've tried so many times. I just don't have a lot of positive thought left. Any advice on how to keep going?
Guest
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 1,174
Morning class
Wish the early morning was long enough to respond to each, but I have read all. This group is forming up now, hi and welcome to all you guys who've come in (my) overnight.
I was originally in a class with amp and incontrol. Had a good long stretch with them, it was great. Now they're back here with their first years. Can be done.
Inspiring.
All the best for the next 24 hours, people.....catch up at the other end of the day.....
Later....
Wish the early morning was long enough to respond to each, but I have read all. This group is forming up now, hi and welcome to all you guys who've come in (my) overnight.
I was originally in a class with amp and incontrol. Had a good long stretch with them, it was great. Now they're back here with their first years. Can be done.
Inspiring.
All the best for the next 24 hours, people.....catch up at the other end of the day.....
Later....
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Santa Barbara, SoCal
Posts: 561
Originally Posted by strangeangel
I know I need a plan, but I just find them so daunting and I always fail. I think my plans going to have to be Antabuse so I can't even think about drinks. I'm in a real low right now. My marriage is a disaster and I just don't want to do life right now. I don't know how to keep going and to be positive. This cycle sucks and is so hard to break and I've tried so many times. I just don't have a lot of positive thought left. Any advice on how to keep going?
I list all the things I am going to do to better my life and it makes me happy.
For you, your list might be whatever you need to change in your life. Think about your perfect life? Does it include drinking?
Its never too late to create the life you want.
I am excited about sobriety. Sometimes I hate it but I have to remind myself how good it feels to be in.control of myself, to not let alcohol control me and my emotions.
Stupid alcohol
Member
Join Date: Mar 2015
Posts: 262
I'm sorry for being so negative. But every time I try and make the plan I fail. It seems hopeless now. I'm happy to know I'm not alone, but right now I really feel like I am. I'm hoping I'll have better attitude tomorrow. Curling up with a book and my pup now.
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