venuscat

I think there were always a ton of songs about drinking, but we notice them more now maybe?

Night love.

Briar

I'm at the party, and at least half of the conversation has been about drinking. T is a realtor, so he's steering the conversation to real estate. Luckily this group loves houses too.

venuscat

So glad T is there with you Briar.

Why are they talking about drinking while they're drinking? Sheesh, how boring.

phoebe64

I feel your pain, Briar.

V, my husband's family, well not the ones that were here last night, but his mom and a one sister and her partner can go on and on and on discussing drinking, beers, etc... Ugh. It IS so very boring. And, it really sucks when I am struggling to not drink.

Hang in there, Briar.

venuscat

And you are doing SO well phoebe love!!
Great job on getting through that evening without drinking!
And I hope your husband put the wine in the basement fridge for you.

Thank you for your kind words in the 24-hour thread love....I am getting very sick of this migraine.

phoebe64

Thank you, V. I am trying. . I wonder if my SAD lifted? The days are quite noticeably longer.

Sorry you are still suffering with the migraine. Does the computer screen bother it? I have to put my phone away if I have a headache, but my headaches affect my eyes. Maybe, even, they come from eye strain. I have very poor vision, even corrected, lots of reading fatigues my eyes. I hope you feel better soon.

I forgot to ask him to bring it down. I'll do it tomorrow. I actually put my hand on it reflexively when getting more seltzer tonight, but did not really even want it. It was subconscious, but reminded me it's better out of sight! Will it even still be enjoyable after a week? It's white, chilled, and well sealed. Lord knows I've never had one open for a week if I'm drinking it!!

venuscat

I would not have a clue....I never had a bottle last more than a night, or half a night more likely.

Do you need to get your eyes checked love? My new glasses last year made all of the difference with my eye strain, and the computer screen. I keep the brightness level low, but yes, I need to get off here now.

phoebe64

Oh, it's a lifelong issue. I get checked regularly, but have convergence issues, had surgery as a kid. Had glasses since 18 month old!! Maybe my bifocal could be a tad stronger, but new glasses are around $700, and I just got these a year ago.

I hope you feel better. Get some rest!

venuscat

I think we talked about this before....I had eye surgery when I was 3.
$700??? Man....that's a lot.
Are eye glasses not covered by health insurance in the US?

phoebe64

We do not purchase vision insurance. It did not cover the thin lenses I need, so was useless. My Rx. Is +7 or so, and another +2.50 for reading. Call me Mr. Magoo. Bleh.

venuscat

Don't forget I've seen a pic with you with your glasses love. You did not look like Mr Magoo, or even Mrs Magoo. You look lovely.

phoebe64

Aww, thanks, V. That was so funny!! I remember I was trying to send you something, forget what, but that photo was still in my browser's copy/paste. I laughed out loud. You are gorgeous, my dear!

I am going to bed. I hope I sleep. I napped late, after my early morning, and slept like the dead. I could not keep my eyes open, but now am feeling a bit too alert. Wish me luck.

Feel better, V.

venuscat

Good luck. ♥

And

Briar

The party ended up being really fun once we got past the heavy wine drinking part. These people are very into the wine and food culture here. Several attendees were restaurant owners and chefs, and those people can drink! This was my biggest drinking scene (aside from at home in my bathroom, of course). My husband was drinking too, which was fine, but I was so grateful to have another sober person with me.

The pinnacle was when my friend opened a 30 year old bottle of port, and they all tried it and effused over how incredible it was. This went on for an eternity. T handed me a cookie, which somehow made a mockery of the whole thing, and that made me laugh.

I never get tired of coming home from a party sober and actually doing something else before bed, rather than pinballing down the hall and dropping into bed with my makeup still on (and possibly my jeans). Instead, I stayed up late working on a set of greeting cards I'm making with mandalas. I was grateful for my sobriety when my daughter rolled in at 4:30am and climbed into our bed. I was grateful again when my alarm went off at 6am. I'm grateful right now that I'm not struggling to keep my coffee down.

Life is so much better.

phoebe64

Amen to all of that, Briar!! So good to wake feeling well, and not sick. That whole scene with the port would be hard for me. I am glad you had a sober buddy by your side.

I didn't drink this weekend, but am feeling tired because I worked very hard cleaning and cooking, and never sat down Saturday, then was up so early yesterday, busy with church, and a few kid things. I just feel tired. I forgot I've just gotten over bronchitis , so I guess my stamina is lacking.

I've got my boy home today. He is saying his tummy does not feel good. I think he's overtired and perhaps a bit off schedule, if you get my drift. He seems pretty fine, but did go back to bed and crash for 2 hours. I don't think he's faking, because he was a bit stressed about missing school.

Arbor

Awesome work Briar. Sobriety is an amazing gift. Aren't we the lucky ones who have figured that out? There is no real benefit to drinking. Even moderately. I don't care what people say. Man, I remember those days waking up feeling duped. That alone is enough to make you feel worthless. Glad that's over with. Peace out!

phoebe64

The biggest thing that I see so clearly in sobriety, Arbor, is all the time wasted on alcohol. Time for fun, time for kids, friends, hobbies, and time to get tasks done. It is such a waste of time. Also money!!

SoberLeigh

Just a quick pop-in to say 'hello' to the lovely Octsobers.

I am incredibly busy. Will bring you up-to-date soon.

I miss all of you so much.

Arbor

Well, you seem a lot more positive about sobriety, Phoebe which is good. That's key for me. I wrote about the "novelty" of it recently in the alcoholism threads.

You've got your fire now just keep tending it.

phoebe64

Thanks Arbor. I read your thread there and replied there.

I was grappling with SAD all winter. The longer days have definitely helped me crack out of my mood and I have been spending time on the Women For Sobriety forums. I like their statements, sort of like AA's 12 steps, but designed for women and their growth as whole persons, not just sobriety. It just resonates with me in a way the 12 steps never have. While I have never gone to AA, I have actually had the Big Book for over 20 years. I have read it. I am not arguing, or trying to offend, but for me, it was just not modern or feminist at all. Of course, the meetings are surely more varied and more evolved than the text written so many years ago, in a very different time. But, just explaining my new feelings and re-energized efforts at sobriety.

So, I do feel more positive. I am focused on enjoying feeling decent, if not awesome when I wake each day. I have had bronchitis, so I am dragging a bit, actually. It really only bothered me for 10 minutes the other night, not drinking, when I finally sat down after going all day on my feet until 9:30 pm. I messaged with a sober and best friend I have from here, and it passed and I had a lovely chat with her. She always makes me smile.

So, I finally have a tool box with some concrete tools. I am not sure why I have had such a hard time doing that, but I have. I have tried, but it was all more ideas in my head, and too random and too many options, but no focus. I have learned the urge surfing does not work for me, but rather a real conversation, an action, like a walk or engaging in some real activity, with my hands, or voice, or body. I am very visual, and need to see it.

I am going to try to keep this going guys.