I know Dee..it'll happen if I make it happen...Thankyou

I'm going to my first social event soon. It's a family thing, but I will have to say "no thanks" for the first time to people who know me as a wine lover. I'm thinking I'll just go with "I'm detoxing" or that "I slept so little last night that I better not"... Which is the truth anyway...

I feel confident and don't think it will be a big deal to refuse. However, it'll be interesting to observe my thoughts and feelings when I'm actually surrounded by people who drink.

So here I go... :)

you can do it Sumi :)

D

Day 8.

Had a call yesterday from my elderly parents to say they're selling the house and getting a divorce (heard this all before). The reason; my Dad's drinking. He's been a heavy drinker all his life, and my mum is fond of a few drinks (well more than a few) too. Alcohol dominated my family life growing up, and its dominated my adult life too. My wife and kids deserve much better, and I'm lucky enough to have time on my side to change it so my kids have better memories.

Stay strong everyone. :)

Thanks charlesg, though I have to admit it I blew it last night. My fiance came home with a bottle of wine and i hadn't brought up that I want drinking again... so I drank. Next steps are obvious really. Bring up that I'm not drinking. I don't want to give up feeling good and being sober.

I think a lot of people compensate one addiction for another. Beating yourself up doesn't help anything though. I need to lose about 20 lbs myself, it's definately tough to deal with multiple things in early sobriety.

Are you not making meetings because things are rocky, or things are rocky because you have been missing meetings? Getting the extra support definately helps, when from meetings or whatever.

I really hope you can make it back to meeting Charles. Sounds like they were helping.

I'm sorry you drank nmd. If your AV is anything like mine it could rationalise for the olympics.

If you want to win - it has to lose, man.

D

Stick with us nmd.

I've tried many times before and relapsed, but this time I stopped the next day after drinking again. The first few days were tough, dealing with the disappointment and regret, but I now feel stronger than I did after a month sober because it thought it could beat my recovery but it only set it back slightly and I can soon be back to where I was.

The first lesson I have learnt is not to drink, not ever. The second lesson is to stop immediately if I do drink. If I stick with this then I can't fail.

Sorry I don't mean to sound like I think I'm an expert, far from it. Just thinking out loud.

We will beat this. :)

Thanks Dee. It's remarkable difficult to bring up in conversation, but I'll do it today. I'll have the support at home if I just ask

nmd :grouphug: Im disappointed for you mate. But it's not the end of the world, or the end of you still wanting to give up drinking. I totally agree with Dee and 5upersonic.
As a side note, and I don't mean to be flippant, can I say..I have tried to hide my drinking MANY times from people at home..but never my NOT drinking :15:
It might be a difficult thing to bring up, but Id say you'd get a better reception admitting you were hiding NOT drinking than if you admitted you were secret drinking..if that makes sense?
If you can get the support, I would go for it

Thank you friend-
The disappointment and psychological addiction are the worst really. I can moderate for a week or two white knuckling it, but it falls apart after that. Blackouts, hangovers , drunk driving, the whole deal

You are totally right, the first step to not drinking is not drinking. We're all experts on ourselves, and I set myself up on that one by not telling the ones I love and live with I wanted to be sober again. I left myself an out basically

Ah, I understand that "out" you said you left yourself. I wouldn't beat yourself up about it though, does no good.
As you said yourself "we are all experts on ourselves" and once we start beating ourselves up , we really know how to kick where it hurts, merciless..and pointless. You need to get into a good frame of mind to go for it, an optimistic frame of mind, and you can't do that while you waste energy berating yourself

Good morning everyone!

Starting Day 7. Going to have the same triggers as yesterday (beautiful weather, daughter going for a sleepover tonight, etc) so feeling a bit anxious. I CANNOT go backwards so I need to do whatever it takes to kick my AV's ***. It felt so good to wake up this morning with no disappointment and hangover. Hope everyone is doing well. If you slipped last night, or whenever, just put the drink down and get back here. Never quit quitting :)

Congrats on your week ladybug - you got this :)

D

So relating to what you are all saying about finding it difficult to talk about NOT drinking! For those of us who are on this sobriety journey by our own accord (as in not pressured by others into sobriety but rather wanting to do it for ourselves) it can be so awkward turning down drinks and so tempting to make excuses such as taking medication, etc...but a wise person right here on SR advised to just kindly say no and keep saying no. Eventually they will get it. And you will have built up some sober muscles in the process!

Good morning everyone!

Stick with us NMD. It seems like you have a mature approach to your relapse and that you will have some support if you ask for it. That is awesome.

Take care.

Congrats on a week ladybug!

Good morning! I slept horrible but that's ok. Trying to find what is causing a terrible odor in the house. Not feeling the best today. One day at a time, I know. Some days are just naturally more fun or you wake up with a more positive disposition. sometimes I just feel pissed off I have this alcohol problem and that I am living with so much pain from it. It seems like such a heavy load to bear and one that I did not ever want.

Lily

Hang in there Kiki... I've done that a few times myself! ;)

Just remember that you're doing this for you! :)

Good morning/evening all! About to start Day #5... I don't know how many more days I'll keep counting, but it helps to keep me accountable for now.

Nmd... I'm glad you're back. Definitely tell your family what's up. You're lucky to have home-based support. My hubby still doesn't get it at times and makes me wanna slap him... ;)

LostLilly... hang in there. Some days are definitely better than others. Stick close to SR on those horrible pissy days.

Day 6 draws to a close. It was a good Saturday. Some work. Some family time. Some exercise. Still feeling a bit irritated in the pit of my stomach over a big defeat on the professional front. It really grates. How do you let these setbacks just wash over you and move on? I must confess I am finding it a bit challenging. Even though in my heart I know that it is ultimately inconsequential. I am being a sore loser and childish. But I feel a bit like Charlie Brown and his baseball games. Some day Charlie Brown, some day.

Just checking in. Have a great weekend everyone! It's gloomy and rainy here in Missouri.

Good morning all hope everyone is having a great day so far. I have a meeting with my therapist in 30 mins and really nervous. I will get through it though. When I come my husband will have literally half a cow we will have to devide for the freezer since half of that is out brothers. It's like 500 lbs of frozen meat oh what fun lol. Who knows how the rest of the day will unfold, I guess it depends on how I feel when leaving therapy today.

Woo hoo 7 days!!!!! Not much going on today. It's beautiful out so I think we'll head out to play for awhile. I hope everyone had a successful sober Friday night!

Apple mat-- I believe we both have sobriety dates of 229.

I'm on day 13. I feel very good. I am going to a restaurant tonight and then over the kids house. We'll see. I intention is to hold the line, and I think I have the strength to do it. My outpatient plan is really helping me. Happy Saturday everybody.

I'd like to join you all. Day 2. I would REALLY like this to be my last class.

Hi everyone, day 6 for me. How do i join class of march 2016? Somebody said i could join the group?

Thanks everyone, love from england x

Whatalaska you just joined ;) all you have to do is post. Congrats on 6 days.
PeacefulRain congrats on a week! Love your screen name.

10pm here in the uk and I'm on my way to day 6. Good night wonderful people and stay strong. You all deserve to be the best you can be!

welcome Chickchick and whatalaska :)
Congrats to everyone notching up another day :)

D

Hi everyone, I would like to join this group too :).

I'm finishing up day 5 today, I have been feeling good thus far but I'm nervous about tomorrow.

Tomorrow is laundry day at the in laws house. Last Sunday I ended up in the hospital after drinking there so I'm feeling embarrassed still. I know I have to face them sooner or later so I might as well get it over with. They are very nice people anyways, so I'm lucky...

The other thing about tomorrow is that they tend to drink a bit and for the last few months I've gotten drunk there on sundays. But I know I can do this. If it gets to be too much I'll just go home, they don't live too far.