Class of February 2016 Support Thread Part 6
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 508
Ready for a great day. Spouses - I used to worry about quiting thinking if my husband drinks it could jeopardize our marriage. This was false thinking. I know now that the only thing that could ruin our marriage is my drinking. I am a much better spouse energized, outgoing and not stuck with repetitive thoughts about how regretful I am for the day before.
I also worry about that 20-30 day mark when I will feel fine and under control. I've got a good reason and perfect excuse to stop now - I have a rare platelet disorder and the alcohol was really starting to deplete them to the point where I was anemic.
If anyone needs energy - I highly recommend B-12. I starting taking it a few weeks ago and saw a much bigger difference that 3 iron pills over months did.
For anyone who "fell off the wagon" just keep going and know it's usually not the first time it sticks and even much later on you may relapse but you have to just keep trying until you are healed.
Hoping for a great day and trying to find a plan to get into exercising again. It's always that first day back to the gym that is so difficult.
I also worry about that 20-30 day mark when I will feel fine and under control. I've got a good reason and perfect excuse to stop now - I have a rare platelet disorder and the alcohol was really starting to deplete them to the point where I was anemic.
If anyone needs energy - I highly recommend B-12. I starting taking it a few weeks ago and saw a much bigger difference that 3 iron pills over months did.
For anyone who "fell off the wagon" just keep going and know it's usually not the first time it sticks and even much later on you may relapse but you have to just keep trying until you are healed.
Hoping for a great day and trying to find a plan to get into exercising again. It's always that first day back to the gym that is so difficult.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2015
Posts: 2,031
Originally Posted by Auggie 
Thanks for the new thread, Dee!
That being said, St. Pat's day is coming up soon. The last time I really quit, it was St. Pat's day that tripped me up. I need to have a plan for that. Anyone made plans for the holiday yet?
That being said, St. Pat's day is coming up soon. The last time I really quit, it was St. Pat's day that tripped me up. I need to have a plan for that. Anyone made plans for the holiday yet?
Member
Join Date: Nov 2015
Posts: 2,031
Originally Posted by Outonthetiles
I know what you mean. I made it home from work okay, but I passed several of my "go to" places. As usual, I flipped off two of them in particular when I went past. Anyway, there is a definite AV vibe going home each night. That is my biggest trigger right now.
I'll run later tonight, so that's a risk because it's after work and I'm leaving the house with cash money on my person, but so far I've fought off AV.
I'll run later tonight, so that's a risk because it's after work and I'm leaving the house with cash money on my person, but so far I've fought off AV.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2015
Posts: 2,031
Originally Posted by GardenGal
Does it get easier? I'm really starting to question. F**k me sideways, but I'm back at day 1. 
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 3,403
Originally Posted by OldTomato
Morning all! I'm worn out but I'm set to do some volunteering today so I have to get out of bed soon. 
Should be getting a lift to the AA women's group later, I got lost last time I tried to get there!!
Thanks for the new thread Dee!
GG - It's fine that you didn't speak at that meeting, I don't speak at meetings either. As for where to begin in recovery, I found it helpful to get out the house - I'd draw out enough money so I could buy food but not alcohol, then leave my cards at home. So I'd get cravings while out of the house and there was nothing I could do about it! I also try to attend AA meetings daily. Both those things might not be practical for you though.
I also found it helpful to reflect on what my life was like while drinking, if my AV was telling me that I could control my drinking I'd write down all the times I tried to control it and failed. Just to prove to it that it's not possible. I found this AA Step 1 worksheet helpful (might not be your thing but could give you some pointers) - http://www.royy.com/step1.pdf
Our paths to recovery are all different, different things work for each of us. But that was how I started out.
Coco - Good to see you back. That sounds awful! That happened in the backroom of our shop once, but we had to keep the shop open!!
Should be getting a lift to the AA women's group later, I got lost last time I tried to get there!!Thanks for the new thread Dee!
GG - It's fine that you didn't speak at that meeting, I don't speak at meetings either. As for where to begin in recovery, I found it helpful to get out the house - I'd draw out enough money so I could buy food but not alcohol, then leave my cards at home. So I'd get cravings while out of the house and there was nothing I could do about it! I also try to attend AA meetings daily. Both those things might not be practical for you though.
I also found it helpful to reflect on what my life was like while drinking, if my AV was telling me that I could control my drinking I'd write down all the times I tried to control it and failed. Just to prove to it that it's not possible. I found this AA Step 1 worksheet helpful (might not be your thing but could give you some pointers) - http://www.royy.com/step1.pdf
Our paths to recovery are all different, different things work for each of us. But that was how I started out.
Coco - Good to see you back. That sounds awful! That happened in the backroom of our shop once, but we had to keep the shop open!!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 3,403
Originally Posted by Outonthetiles
I'm up early.
Day 28.
Day 28.
I was ok after 21 days. Not sure if this is another phase that one hits in sobriety. I have been upping the sugar to combat any self pity that I have had recently.
I would love to drink three glasses of wine but there is no point evening mentioning this. Stupid of me to even type what I just said
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 3,403
Dee is this normal for early recovery? I feel like I am going backwards. My cravings are worse than before. They use to be one tidal wave and then it was gone . But this one hasn't left me since sunday. It feels different..like little waves contantly crashing on the beach every hour.
It sucks! I wont give in cause my life is so much better since I stopped being a hopeless, useless drunk. But still...its soooooo draining
It sucks! I wont give in cause my life is so much better since I stopped being a hopeless, useless drunk. But still...its soooooo draining
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Canada
Posts: 1,247
Originally Posted by knb02
Dee is this normal for early recovery? I feel like I am going backwards. My cravings are worse than before. They use to be one tidal wave and then it was gone . But this one hasn't left me since sunday. It feels different..like little waves contantly crashing on the beach every hour.
It sucks! I wont give in cause my life is so much better since I stopped being a hopeless, useless drunk. But still...its soooooo draining
It sucks! I wont give in cause my life is so much better since I stopped being a hopeless, useless drunk. But still...its soooooo draining
However last evening after work it was a stronger craving than ever. I read here and did not post.
My AV was trying to convince me I did 30 days. "No problem here".
The thoughts I had. crazing. like thinking it is February 29th. Just drink tonight and join the march group tomorrow. I could feel those intense cravings. I was thinking to myself will this ever stop, these craving?
I drove by the store. It took a great deal of mental energy however I did it. What works for me lately is thinking about what 2 am the next morning will feel like. Just how utterly disappointed I will feel at that time. I also imagined what it would feel like to get into bed sober.
I understand that part of energy. I know tonight after work will be another battle. Yet if I give in it will not be good.
Stay strong. I truly believe at 60 days it will be better. I plan on getting there one day at a time.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: New York
Posts: 3,241
Good morning all. I am still around; just deciding whether to post here or join in March. I knowingly drank Sunday night. When I have those "screw it" days, I am not thinking I will control it, or that I am "better" - I merely give in for an evening of drinks. I realize a couple years ago I had turned into an everyday wine drinker, it has morphed with motherhood to binge drinking by definition. Which honestly feels almost worse.
I am catching up, and will post more later. Congrats to all hitting milestones, and even just coming back.
I knowingly drank Sunday night. When I have those "screw it" days, I am not thinking I will control it, or that I am "better" - I merely give in for an evening of drinks. I realize a couple years ago I had turned into an everyday wine drinker, it has morphed with motherhood to binge drinking by definition. Which honestly feels almost worse.I am catching up, and will post more later. Congrats to all hitting milestones, and even just coming back.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: California
Posts: 1,428
I had over 30 days last fall, it does seem that's a hard time. Do not drink!!! I did and had the worst blackout ever, with depression and bad anxiety resulting. We all know it's just not worth it. Think of all the bad things drinking has caused for us.
SMART has a workbook where you write the pros and cons of drinking. I wrote cons for pages. It's eye opening.
SMART has a workbook where you write the pros and cons of drinking. I wrote cons for pages. It's eye opening.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2015
Posts: 2,031
So, Day 3 and I still feel horrible. Definitely flu like symptoms, but my scratchy throat feels like I was drinking vodka straight all night. I've been coughing as well. It's actually a bit worse than yesterday and I'm more determined than ever to not go through this again.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 3,403
Originally Posted by soberjim
knb02... I very much relate to your post. yesterday was 30 days for me. I am very pleased with that achievement. Friday and Saturday nights are hard for me; except this week end it was manageable.
However last evening after work it was a stronger craving than ever. I read here and did not post.
My AV was trying to convince me I did 30 days. "No problem here".
The thoughts I had. crazing. like thinking it is February 29th. Just drink tonight and join the march group tomorrow. I could feel those intense cravings. I was thinking to myself will this ever stop, these craving?
I drove by the store. It took a great deal of mental energy however I did it. What works for me lately is thinking about what 2 am the next morning will feel like. Just how utterly disappointed I will feel at that time. I also imagined what it would feel like to get into bed sober.
I understand that part of energy. I know tonight after work will be another battle. Yet if I give in it will not be good.
Stay strong. I truly believe at 60 days it will be better. I plan on getting there one day at a time.
However last evening after work it was a stronger craving than ever. I read here and did not post.
My AV was trying to convince me I did 30 days. "No problem here".
The thoughts I had. crazing. like thinking it is February 29th. Just drink tonight and join the march group tomorrow. I could feel those intense cravings. I was thinking to myself will this ever stop, these craving?
I drove by the store. It took a great deal of mental energy however I did it. What works for me lately is thinking about what 2 am the next morning will feel like. Just how utterly disappointed I will feel at that time. I also imagined what it would feel like to get into bed sober.
I understand that part of energy. I know tonight after work will be another battle. Yet if I give in it will not be good.
Stay strong. I truly believe at 60 days it will be better. I plan on getting there one day at a time.
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