Blogs


Notices

Class of February 2016 Support Thread Part 5

Old 02-28-2016, 11:11 AM
  # 301 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: New England
Posts: 1,061
Blog Entries: 13
Originally Posted by SweatyHands View Post
We actually just moved out here last summer. I started grad school in the fall and started drinking again after 3 1/2 years sober. I had a few rough patches and quit periodically, but this last relapse got messy and could have been messier. So, this time, I am putting every ounce of energy into my recovery.
3.5 years sober that's a lot to bank. I had a year from 2012-2013, probably the happiest year of my adult life. I descended though and I'm quite aware of why. Since then I've had a few 2 month stretches but lost accountability each time. My last binge could have been a lot messier too, in a way I was very lucky... I'm going to take that as a sign that it needs to end, here and now. I need to move on and find love for myself and not abuse. Keep your head up my friend.
jobei is offline  
The Following 9 Users Say Thank You to jobei For This Useful Post:
Auggie (02-28-2016), Dee74 (02-28-2016), FacingFuture (02-28-2016), GardenGal (02-28-2016), graced333 (02-28-2016), safeandsound (02-28-2016), spadge (02-28-2016), Time2Rise (02-28-2016)
Old 02-28-2016, 11:21 AM
  # 302 (permalink)  
Member
 
opalblue's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 3,403
Originally Posted by jobei View Post
Knb02 I've seen ppl just use group sessions as a social outlet because no one else will listen to them, people that don't really want to stop. They are seeking attention. I suppose it's a thin line though, where does the desire to stop start? If she's disruptive to the point that the meeting isn't working she shouldn't be there... otherwise try to think about how that's not you! YOU are doing what needs to be done and for that I commend you. You know the cycle and where it leads and you've found enough love for yourself to stop. Be proud of what you've accomplished, relish it! It will only get better.

Also the roast sounds amazing I bet you're a great cook.
Yes it is a thin line. But hey! She isn't my responsibility and I shouldn't feel guilty or bad for thinking this. It's down to her to stop. She is definitely seeking attention and I am tired of it.
I think she needs to speak to her counsellor privately and not make the group meeting all about her. It's not fair on the rest of us because no one wants to be mean to her but everyone is secretly annoyed. If we wanted to be around drunk people then we would have gone to the pub / bar .

Well done on a year of sobriety. I managed five months years ago. God knows how. I started drinking again because I felt I was cured. Ha. What a joke.

Anyway my roast is looking lovely and I haven't burnt anything..including my arms. Lol
opalblue is offline  
The Following 8 Users Say Thank You to opalblue For This Useful Post:
Auggie (02-28-2016), Dee74 (02-28-2016), GardenGal (02-28-2016), jobei (02-28-2016), OldTomato (02-28-2016), spadge (02-28-2016), Time2Rise (02-28-2016)
Old 02-28-2016, 11:22 AM
  # 303 (permalink)  
Member
 
opalblue's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 3,403
Originally Posted by Emandm View Post
22 days and my house has never been this clean
Ha ha I was thinking the same.
opalblue is offline  
The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to opalblue For This Useful Post:
Auggie (02-28-2016), Dee74 (02-28-2016), graced333 (02-28-2016), jobei (02-28-2016), spadge (02-28-2016), Time2Rise (02-28-2016)
Old 02-28-2016, 11:22 AM
  # 304 (permalink)  
Member
 
opalblue's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 3,403
Originally Posted by JL2014 View Post
Oh yea .
I made a (( 7)) today !!!!!
First week in over a year.
My life's a mess to be sure, but not the mess it was a week ago.
I'm waking up this this morning hungry for life !
Good for you JL
opalblue is offline  
The Following 5 Users Say Thank You to opalblue For This Useful Post:
Auggie (02-28-2016), Dee74 (02-28-2016), jobei (02-28-2016), spadge (02-28-2016), Time2Rise (02-28-2016)
Old 02-28-2016, 11:24 AM
  # 305 (permalink)  
Member
 
opalblue's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 3,403
Well done to everyone with milestones Well done
opalblue is offline  
The Following 7 Users Say Thank You to opalblue For This Useful Post:
amyrose (02-29-2016), Auggie (02-28-2016), Dee74 (02-28-2016), jobei (02-28-2016), OldTomato (02-28-2016), spadge (02-28-2016), Time2Rise (02-28-2016)
Old 02-28-2016, 11:28 AM
  # 306 (permalink)  
Nature Lover & Plantoholic
 
GardenGal's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2016
Location: The Golden State
Posts: 284
Hi Febs, starting off day 4 here feeling pretty good [for once]. Had a heartfelt talk with the hubby that was rather emotional for me, but good. I truly and honestly hope that I can stick to my promise to him this time.

Also had a good talk with my 11 year old yesterday. He always tells me "don't worry" lately, and I asked him please not to do that, because I'm entitled to my emotions. His merely opening up to me about his own fears will relieve mine.

Dee, I bought the book. It's Amazon reviews are the best I think I've ever seen. Thanks you guys for the funny exchanges NZ v. Oz -- I need to laugh more, like I used to!! I'm not a geographical-knowledge challenged Yank -- I've travelled quite extensively, lived in 4 other countries, and speak multiple languages. My husband travels a ton for work, and luckily I sometimes join him.

Anyhoo, my plan this week is attend more AA meetings. I did like the group that I tried once. I'm also going to the doc, but I now wonder if many of my weird ailments aren't due to booze, and will resolve on their own?? Possible sleep apnea is one, recently acquired asthma [and I've never smoked], stomach ailments, recent high BP and irregular heartbeat… Oy.

Happy Sunday to all! We're going to take a nature hike. I used to say "cheers" a lot, but I guess I shouldn't say that anymore!
GardenGal is offline  
The Following 11 Users Say Thank You to GardenGal For This Useful Post:
Auggie (02-28-2016), Dee74 (02-28-2016), Delizadee (02-28-2016), jobei (02-28-2016), OldTomato (02-28-2016), safeandsound (02-28-2016), spadge (02-28-2016), SweatyHands (02-28-2016), Time2Rise (02-28-2016)
Old 02-28-2016, 11:39 AM
  # 307 (permalink)  
Member
 
safeandsound's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Canada
Posts: 315
I've been reading all the posts, and so many people have beaten down the urge when it comes! Good work! (and it IS work).

I'm really proud of myself that I didn't drink last night. I posted about the bag of candy helping . . . but it was also that just for a split second, I imagined the near futre: blackout rage in which I hurt my husband severely--we were already at odds--and a morning in which I was paralyzed in bed or sick or had a raging headache. Blech.

So now I've experienced what people call "playing the tape through." And it worked.

I just wanted to share a link from a blog I read regularly called "Mummy was a Secret Drinker." She talks about people who relapse over and over (like me) and how they are really just doing the hard parts of sobriety over and over again and never reaching the other side of happiness. They turn back to what is familiar, which is the ugly world of drinking. She has this great analogy to an obstacle course :

Mummy was a Secret Drinker: The Obstacle Course

Dee, thank you so much for the quotes. I got a lot out of them.
safeandsound is offline  
The Following 10 Users Say Thank You to safeandsound For This Useful Post:
Auggie (02-28-2016), Dee74 (02-28-2016), GardenGal (02-28-2016), graced333 (02-28-2016), jobei (02-28-2016), OldTomato (02-28-2016), spadge (02-28-2016), Time2Rise (02-28-2016)
Old 02-28-2016, 11:47 AM
  # 308 (permalink)  
Member
 
OldTomato's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: England
Posts: 2,675
Blog Entries: 8
knb - Sorry to hear that woman is causing problems for you in your meeting. I would recommend switching groups rather than getting into any conflict. Getting into an argument could cause you to drink again, or put you off meetings altogether. I'd rather that didn't happen for you.
Like jobei said, it could be good to look at it and think "that's not me". The man who had been drinking in my meeting today allowed me to look at things from a different perspective. He felt on top of the world and confident, when really he was annoying everyone. One of my reasons for drinking was confidence, it really showed me that drunk confidence isn't desirable.

jobei - I wish I could tip/give away that vodka, but I'm scared that just holding the bottle will be a trigger for me. Maybe I'm just making excuses? I will get round to getting rid of it. When I'm home alone next perhaps.

SweatyHands - Congrats on reaching Day 4, I'm glad you got some sleep!

Badger - Day 25 is amazing! That means you're approaching a month of sobriety now?

Emandm - Well done on Day 22. It's brilliant that you're getting work around the house done. Unfortunately my room is still a bit of a tip in sobriety.

GardenGal - It's great that you're opening up to your husband and I hope you do keep those promises. Remember that you're doing this for yourself as well though! Going to meetings is a great idea, especially if you liked your last one.

safeandsound - Thanks for sharing that link, it described it all perfectly! It does feel like an obstacle course. On average when trying to quit I'd reach Day 3, I think my best was Day 6. Beating that average did feel like getting past the first part of the obstacle course. I need to remember that any struggles I'm facing right now is just something I need to work through, otherwise I'll be trapped in that field again.
OldTomato is offline  
The Following 7 Users Say Thank You to OldTomato For This Useful Post:
Auggie (02-28-2016), Dee74 (02-28-2016), GardenGal (02-28-2016), safeandsound (02-28-2016), spadge (02-28-2016), Time2Rise (02-28-2016)
Old 02-28-2016, 11:48 AM
  # 309 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: New England
Posts: 1,061
Blog Entries: 13
Knb02 I want to be clear I was sober for one year but that was three years ago. Currently I have 6 days. I've thought a lot about what got me back drinking and I'm working hard to not make the same mistakes. I'm trying to listen to what other sober people have done successfully and learn from it. I'm fighting day by day.
jobei is offline  
The Following 8 Users Say Thank You to jobei For This Useful Post:
Auggie (02-28-2016), GardenGal (02-28-2016), graced333 (02-28-2016), OldTomato (02-28-2016), safeandsound (02-28-2016), spadge (02-28-2016), Time2Rise (02-28-2016)
Old 02-28-2016, 11:53 AM
  # 310 (permalink)  
Member
 
FacingFuture's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Southern California
Posts: 554
Blog Entries: 6
Hey all. Back on day 1.

For anyone considering drinking... IT IS NOT WORTH IT.

Drinking last night got me ZERO benefit. The only thing it did was cause a fight with my wife (who detected it right away) and cause a MASSIVE hangover today.

I should have posted here and not taken that first drink.
FacingFuture is offline  
The Following 15 Users Say Thank You to FacingFuture For This Useful Post:
amazingjoy (02-28-2016), Auggie (02-28-2016), Dee74 (02-28-2016), GardenGal (02-28-2016), graced333 (02-28-2016), jobei (02-28-2016), kittycat3 (02-28-2016), OldTomato (02-28-2016), Paix Amour (02-28-2016), safeandsound (02-28-2016), spadge (02-28-2016), SweatyHands (02-28-2016), Time2Rise (02-28-2016)
Old 02-28-2016, 11:57 AM
  # 311 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: New England
Posts: 1,061
Blog Entries: 13
I understand Oldtomato. I currently live with my brother and his gf, they are not problem drinkers but they enjoy their booze so the house is stocked up like a bar. It calls to me and knowing it's here bothers me. I'd dump it if I could but it's not mine. I'm going to be moving out of here by April 1st because I HAVE to do it for my sobriety. I have to limit my exposure to drinkers and alcohol as much as possible. Could you ask a friend to come take the bottles from your home? I bet it will be like a weight lifted off your shoulders!
jobei is offline  
The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to jobei For This Useful Post:
Auggie (02-28-2016), Dee74 (02-28-2016), GardenGal (02-28-2016), OldTomato (02-28-2016), spadge (02-28-2016), Time2Rise (02-28-2016)
Old 02-28-2016, 12:00 PM
  # 312 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: New England
Posts: 1,061
Blog Entries: 13
Originally Posted by FacingFuture View Post
Hey all. Back on day 1.

For anyone considering drinking... IT IS NOT WORTH IT.

Drinking last night got me ZERO benefit. The only thing it did was cause a fight with my wife (who detected it right away) and cause a MASSIVE hangover today.

I should have posted here and not taken that first drink.
If it was a one time fix everyone would quit and thus site wouldn't exist. It's such a hard thing please try to recognize why you drank and why you want to give it up and go from there. You can do it...!
jobei is offline  
The Following 10 Users Say Thank You to jobei For This Useful Post:
Auggie (02-28-2016), Dee74 (02-28-2016), FacingFuture (02-28-2016), GardenGal (02-28-2016), graced333 (02-28-2016), OldTomato (02-28-2016), Paix Amour (02-28-2016), spadge (02-28-2016), Time2Rise (02-28-2016)
Old 02-28-2016, 12:04 PM
  # 313 (permalink)  
Member
 
OldTomato's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: England
Posts: 2,675
Blog Entries: 8
I just text my friend to say thanks but no thanks to the job offer, I told her I wanted to focus on working the AA steps and then go back into education. She was understanding. I don't know what I was so worried about! I'm glad I sent that text. Thanks for telling me to do that Coco (if you read this!!).

FF - I'm sorry to hear that you slipped up, but very well done on coming back. That's not an easy thing to do! Remember that it had zero benefit and was not what you were expecting it to be! What are you going to do to avoid this happening again?

jobei - I'm glad you're able to get out of that house soon and be away from it! Having to wait around is like being in limbo but stay strong and lean on us for support. The only friend who would do that for me is also an alcoholic (2 years sober), not sure if it would be appropriate for me to ask her to do that! Next time I'm home alone I'll try and get rid of it myself.
OldTomato is offline  
The Following 10 Users Say Thank You to OldTomato For This Useful Post:
amyrose (02-29-2016), Auggie (02-28-2016), Dee74 (02-28-2016), FacingFuture (02-28-2016), GardenGal (02-28-2016), graced333 (02-28-2016), Paix Amour (02-28-2016), spadge (02-28-2016), Time2Rise (02-28-2016)
Old 02-28-2016, 12:06 PM
  # 314 (permalink)  
Member
 
Delizadee's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2016
Location: middle of nowhere
Posts: 2,848
Blog Entries: 1
Weeehooo!!! Day 14!!

I missed 3 AA meetings I was planning on going to last night and this morning- oops. I got my van stuck out at my farm and ended up staying there for night. I kinda had a slip up of sorts last night... not drinking related though. And I don't feel one bit guilty about it lol... in fact I am in a pretty darn good mood. No harm done.

Every day that passes I am feeling more at peace with myself. I remember being pregnant in 2012 an moving out to the farm. That first year out there was amazing. I was sober, happy, healthy and oh so busy. I find myself back to that same peace of mind I felt then, even though everything is still such a mess and so much to figure out. Starting to get my feet planted back on the ground and the strength to deal with things as they come and with a calm head.

I've finally learned how to flip anger and resentment around pretty quickly. Instead of mulling on things for days on end and turning a rain cloud into a hurricane like I had a tendency to do. It's lifted a lot of the anxiety and pain I was dealing with.

I'm sorry so many of us struggle with our families. I know I do too. I had to take a break from half of my small family so I could work on my recovery. They made my early recovery AWFUL for me. This time around I'm sticking to protecting my sobriety and just keeping my space until I am solid enough to calmly deal with them again.

Good work everyone. And big hugs to those who are struggling.
Happy happy Sunday Februbuddies <3

It's been so awesome reading stories, sharing in each other's lives and getting those links that are shared. You guys are all amazing people.
Delizadee is offline  
The Following 11 Users Say Thank You to Delizadee For This Useful Post:
amazingjoy (02-28-2016), Auggie (02-28-2016), Dee74 (02-28-2016), GardenGal (02-28-2016), graced333 (02-28-2016), jobei (02-28-2016), OldTomato (02-28-2016), safeandsound (02-28-2016), spadge (02-28-2016), Time2Rise (02-28-2016)
Old 02-28-2016, 12:11 PM
  # 315 (permalink)  
Member
 
OldTomato's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: England
Posts: 2,675
Blog Entries: 8
Delizadee - It's great to see you in such high spirits! At the end of this day you'll be two weeks sober, well done!! Don't feel too guilty about missing those meetings, it's not always practical to attend them - life keeps on going. Just don't get into the habit of not attending them at all if they're helping you!
OldTomato is offline  
The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to OldTomato For This Useful Post:
Auggie (02-28-2016), Dee74 (02-28-2016), GardenGal (02-28-2016), spadge (02-28-2016), Time2Rise (02-28-2016)
Old 02-28-2016, 12:12 PM
  # 316 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: New England
Posts: 1,061
Blog Entries: 13
Sounds good Delizadee you're doing great keep it up! My happiest times have been when I was sober too... go figure!
jobei is offline  
The Following 8 Users Say Thank You to jobei For This Useful Post:
Auggie (02-28-2016), Dee74 (02-28-2016), GardenGal (02-28-2016), graced333 (02-28-2016), OldTomato (02-28-2016), spadge (02-28-2016), Time2Rise (02-28-2016)
Old 02-28-2016, 12:31 PM
  # 317 (permalink)  
Member
 
JL2014's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2014
Posts: 2,049
Oh man, just helped the neighbor move furniture. Wife's out rambling, doing errands, staying busy so she doesn't get depressed from missing her dad. Today's the day I would drink, do all the laundry for the week (about 1-2hrs) , then clean and mop. I asked her to help me out with laundry this morning.
I'm not doing this crap alone anymore and drinking over it.
Not drinking today !
JL2014 is offline  
The Following 8 Users Say Thank You to JL2014 For This Useful Post:
Auggie (02-28-2016), Dee74 (02-28-2016), GardenGal (02-28-2016), graced333 (02-28-2016), jobei (02-28-2016), OldTomato (02-28-2016), spadge (02-28-2016)
Old 02-28-2016, 12:35 PM
  # 318 (permalink)  
Member
 
OldTomato's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: England
Posts: 2,675
Blog Entries: 8
JL - Glad to hear you're sober and keeping yourself AND your wife busy.
OldTomato is offline  
The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to OldTomato For This Useful Post:
Auggie (02-28-2016), Dee74 (02-28-2016), jobei (02-28-2016), spadge (02-28-2016), Time2Rise (02-28-2016)
Old 02-28-2016, 12:57 PM
  # 319 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: New England
Posts: 1,061
Blog Entries: 13
JL good job not drinking. I'm not going to drink either. I want to find some peace and alcohol won't allow that..
jobei is offline  
The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to jobei For This Useful Post:
Auggie (02-28-2016), Dee74 (02-28-2016), OldTomato (02-28-2016), spadge (02-28-2016), Time2Rise (02-28-2016)
Old 02-28-2016, 01:33 PM
  # 320 (permalink)  
Member
 
CuteNGayYay's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Southern Cali
Posts: 1,295
Day 8. got asked to go out to a club last night and I know I'm not ready for that. There was a point a few years ago during a sober streak I used to go and just have red bulls. I just need more time to get there. Hope everyone has a great Sunday. Rooting for Jennifer Lawrence tonight! ADORE her.
CuteNGayYay is offline  
The Following 10 Users Say Thank You to CuteNGayYay For This Useful Post:
Auggie (02-28-2016), Dee74 (02-28-2016), GardenGal (02-28-2016), graced333 (02-28-2016), kittycat3 (02-29-2016), OldTomato (02-28-2016), safeandsound (02-28-2016), spadge (02-28-2016), Time2Rise (02-28-2016)

Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 07:57 AM.