Class of February 2016 Support Thread Part 1
Member
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: West Coast
Posts: 54
Thanks everyone for the words of encouragement. 
And I'm glad you are posting, Tink. I'm also going to stay closer to SR this time around.
First day of the new job went well. Mostly just getting the office setup, filling out paperwork, setting up my computer, etc. It's a small company and the folks I will be working closest with are Mormon and do not drink. My last job had a drinking culture -- happy hours, sometimes drinking at lunch, etc. I think these new surroundings are going to be helpful.
I lifted weights last night. Sheesh I'm weak.
Last night I had some pretty crazy dreams, which happened the last time I stopped drinking. Including a couple about being in situations with drinking and trying to avoid it.
I'm now having a bowl of oatmeal with raspberries -- the healthiest breakfast I've had in a looong time.
And I'm glad you are posting, Tink. I'm also going to stay closer to SR this time around.
First day of the new job went well. Mostly just getting the office setup, filling out paperwork, setting up my computer, etc. It's a small company and the folks I will be working closest with are Mormon and do not drink. My last job had a drinking culture -- happy hours, sometimes drinking at lunch, etc. I think these new surroundings are going to be helpful.
I lifted weights last night. Sheesh I'm weak.
Last night I had some pretty crazy dreams, which happened the last time I stopped drinking. Including a couple about being in situations with drinking and trying to avoid it. I'm now having a bowl of oatmeal with raspberries -- the healthiest breakfast I've had in a looong time.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: Michigan
Posts: 205
Hi everyone! I would like to join your class...it was so helpful having a class last summer and fall at my first shot being sober. I am here again to make it work. I know I am definitely going to need everyone's help.
Today is my Day 1. So far so good...because it's only 10:46am, haha. The real tough part will be coming home from work later around 8:30pm, knowing I have no work tomorrow and that it's a perfect opportunity to drink massive quantities of wine all night. Even just thinking about how I know I'll feel...makes my brain say, "Well, let's just give in then! Restart tomorrow!"
I wish I didn't feel weak for having that AV, or for it having that hold on me.
I need a plan this time, but I'm scared of having one, of having to try. I am glad we are all here for each other.
When I get time, I am going to read over this thread to get to know everyone.
Today is my Day 1. So far so good...because it's only 10:46am, haha. The real tough part will be coming home from work later around 8:30pm, knowing I have no work tomorrow and that it's a perfect opportunity to drink massive quantities of wine all night. Even just thinking about how I know I'll feel...makes my brain say, "Well, let's just give in then! Restart tomorrow!"
I wish I didn't feel weak for having that AV, or for it having that hold on me.I need a plan this time, but I'm scared of having one, of having to try. I am glad we are all here for each other.
When I get time, I am going to read over this thread to get to know everyone.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2016
Posts: 118
Welcome mns1!
And welcome whiteturtle! I know all about those thoughts of "Well, I'll go ahead and drink tonight and just start over with not drinking tomorrow." But as I'm sure you know too, tomorrow never comes. There's always an excuse, isn't there?
And welcome whiteturtle! I know all about those thoughts of "Well, I'll go ahead and drink tonight and just start over with not drinking tomorrow." But as I'm sure you know too, tomorrow never comes. There's always an excuse, isn't there?
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Posts: 168
whiteturtle - This time around is my first time actually making a plan. My previous attempts consisted of just trying my best not to drink and well, that has not worked out so well. Don't be afraid of making one, I feel it is really helping me. My anxiety level has always run rather high and I am finding that by writing down my triggers and specific ways of dealing with them that don't include alcohol, my overall anxiety level has really come down a lot, which in turn makes my triggers not so trigger-y, lol.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2016
Location: san francisco, ca
Posts: 12
Hi guys, i'm new to SR and am day 3 sober. I joined SR for accountability and to meet others that I can relate to. I had gone to a few AA meetings before and at my first meeting a girl approached me and asked if she could be my sponsor. I was a bit hesitant-not knowing what that would entail, and quickly became overwhelmed by the "rules" that went along with it. You MUST call me before 4pm and check in....first of all I don't even talk to my parents, friends or boyfriend everyday, let alone a sponsor. That quickly dwindled and didn't work for me. However I know I need accountability but not at an everyday expense. I am voluntarily going on to SR everyday blogging how I'm feeling and I feel support by those that respond. I'm eager to see how this works out...
Member
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: Michigan
Posts: 205
I just read through all the posts so far, and I saw a lot of familiar names! I am happy to see you all here, too, not giving up. We know we can do this, we just...have to do this!
Thanks Chinaski and SleepyDots. You're right, I need to just push past any thoughts of "I'll do it tomorrow," because if I can do it tomorrow, what's the point of putting it off? And the plan is definitely essential. I'm nervous about not having one because of how I am currently feeling...
My first run at sobriety last summer, I was so full of hope and positivity. There were some extremely mentally trying times, but somehow I made it through to almost a month. I at least had so much resolve and optimism about making the change. This time, though, posting in here today...it's like, even though I am here and resolved and committed, and I want to make this work, I keep hearing the voice in the back of my head telling me it is just easier to give in. It's telling me I have an uncommon day off work tomorrow, so the "opportunity" to have a hangover without it affecting work is "perfect." I am worried because I don't know if that's the AV, or if it's just me being weak. I feel like it's just me being weak. I am afraid of myself, and afraid of this evening after work.
I cannot stress how appreciative I am to this site, to Dee, to all of the veterans around here, who take immeasurable amounts of time out of their lives to bolster and support all of us either on the journey or beginning it. I know that I have a place of support, and that feels like 95% of the battle.
I need to just remind myself that I am here again, I am posting, I have joined a class, this is real, and I'm doing it. That is such a huge head start, even with the thought of following through feeling impossible.
I am sure I will be posting here quite a bit today. I am grateful to you all for putting up with me.
Thanks Chinaski and SleepyDots.
You're right, I need to just push past any thoughts of "I'll do it tomorrow," because if I can do it tomorrow, what's the point of putting it off? And the plan is definitely essential. I'm nervous about not having one because of how I am currently feeling...My first run at sobriety last summer, I was so full of hope and positivity. There were some extremely mentally trying times, but somehow I made it through to almost a month. I at least had so much resolve and optimism about making the change. This time, though, posting in here today...it's like, even though I am here and resolved and committed, and I want to make this work, I keep hearing the voice in the back of my head telling me it is just easier to give in. It's telling me I have an uncommon day off work tomorrow, so the "opportunity" to have a hangover without it affecting work is "perfect." I am worried because I don't know if that's the AV, or if it's just me being weak. I feel like it's just me being weak. I am afraid of myself, and afraid of this evening after work.
I cannot stress how appreciative I am to this site, to Dee, to all of the veterans around here, who take immeasurable amounts of time out of their lives to bolster and support all of us either on the journey or beginning it. I know that I have a place of support, and that feels like 95% of the battle.
I need to just remind myself that I am here again, I am posting, I have joined a class, this is real, and I'm doing it. That is such a huge head start, even with the thought of following through feeling impossible.
I am sure I will be posting here quite a bit today. I am grateful to you all for putting up with me.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Canada
Posts: 1,247
Originally Posted by Applekat 
I am starting to feel silly joining class after class. But I promised myself I would never stop trying. I need the support. And one of these times it has to just stick. It has to.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: Michigan
Posts: 205
Thanks, Chris. I wish it was warmer so I could go for a long bike ride without it being miserable...that always eats up a lot of the day. There is sooo much I need to do around my apartment that a day off is necessary for. I get so anxious when I have so much to get done, and then the AV pipes in and says it will take the edge off if I drink wine and get it all done, reward myself as I go, and I will actually do it in that case, so wine is helpful here. Sigh, obviously that is not the sane train of thought.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Posts: 168
whiteturtle, you aren't weak. You're not. Like all of us here, you have a problem with alcohol and while not drinking is simple, it is not always easy. When we have turned to alcohol so many times in the past, it takes effort to change but it is so worth it. Think about some things you can do this evening other than drinking, it is easier to get through those difficult hours when you have a list of options on hand, if you're like me when you get hit with a craving it can be hard to think clearly of anything else, so planning for it in advance is crucial, IMO. Try not to overwhelm yourself with thoughts of forever, just get through tonight, then we'll deal with tomorrow tomorrow.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2016
Posts: 118
Welcome zap526 and soberjim!
Whiteturtle--instead of thinking about how you could endure a hangover on your day off tomorrow, maybe focus on how nice it'd be to have a clear (or clearer, at least) headed hangover-free day instead. Do your tasks around the apartment and reward yourself with a scoop/bite of ice cream. Start retraining your brain.
^^^ So much truth and wisdom in this ^^^
Whiteturtle--instead of thinking about how you could endure a hangover on your day off tomorrow, maybe focus on how nice it'd be to have a clear (or clearer, at least) headed hangover-free day instead. Do your tasks around the apartment and reward yourself with a scoop/bite of ice cream. Start retraining your brain.
Originally Posted by SleepyDots
Like all of us here, you have a problem with alcohol and while not drinking is simple, it is not always easy. When we have turned to alcohol so many times in the past, it takes effort to change but it is so worth it.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 3,190
Originally Posted by SleepyDots
whiteturtle, you aren't weak. You're not. Like all of us here, you have a problem with alcohol and while not drinking is simple, it is not always easy. When we have turned to alcohol so many times in the past, it takes effort to change but it is so worth it. Think about some things you can do this evening other than drinking, it is easier to get through those difficult hours when you have a list of options on hand, if you're like me when you get hit with a craving it can be hard to think clearly of anything else, so planning for it in advance is crucial, IMO. Try not to overwhelm yourself with thoughts of forever, just get through tonight, then we'll deal with tomorrow tomorrow.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: South East England
Posts: 8,009
Hello all. I'm so sad and lost. I had 2 years 7 months, then 10 months, and now I'm back to day 2.
At the moment I'm doing meetings every night, and am considering outpatient rehab. I'm just so scared that I'm a hopeless case and am never going to make this stick long term.
It's really reassuring to see so many of this class who are refusing to give up. I think I will fit in here. Ok if I tag along?
At the moment I'm doing meetings every night, and am considering outpatient rehab. I'm just so scared that I'm a hopeless case and am never going to make this stick long term.
It's really reassuring to see so many of this class who are refusing to give up. I think I will fit in here. Ok if I tag along?
Member
Join Date: Apr 2015
Location: Lincolnshire, UK
Posts: 440
Hi
Can I join in with you please?
I first joined SR on 2 February 2015 - I was watching the Superbowl on the TV and being in the UK (and a way in to the game) it was the 2nd so today is my anniversary of finding SR. 2 February 2015 was also my first day of 6 weeks of sobriety. It then went down hill.
I've tried on and off since but it hasn't worked. I hoped to crack it last month but didn't.
Yesterday I saw a counsellor for depression, anxiety, low mood etc and he gave me some booklets to read and with exercises (pen and paper ones) to work on to basically show I am a better person than I tell myself I am, that I can achieve whatever I want and just because throughout my life I've been told I'm second best I don't have to believe that.
I got home from counselling and then drank. But when I got up this morning I felt different mentally - like something had clicked. I ordered a shed load of self help books that will be delivered tomorrow and also started working through the booklets.
I can't explain exactly 'how' I'm feeling different but I just know that the sober life holds a lot more appeal to me than the drunk one.
I'm realistic enough to know (and remember from last time) that over the next few weeks I'll have days when this adrenaline rush dips and I feel tired and the cravings start niggling but I want this more than I've ever wanted anything (well, except for a house in the sun somewhere :-D )
Can I join in with you please?
I first joined SR on 2 February 2015 - I was watching the Superbowl on the TV and being in the UK (and a way in to the game) it was the 2nd so today is my anniversary of finding SR. 2 February 2015 was also my first day of 6 weeks of sobriety. It then went down hill.
I've tried on and off since but it hasn't worked. I hoped to crack it last month but didn't.
Yesterday I saw a counsellor for depression, anxiety, low mood etc and he gave me some booklets to read and with exercises (pen and paper ones) to work on to basically show I am a better person than I tell myself I am, that I can achieve whatever I want and just because throughout my life I've been told I'm second best I don't have to believe that.
I got home from counselling and then drank. But when I got up this morning I felt different mentally - like something had clicked. I ordered a shed load of self help books that will be delivered tomorrow and also started working through the booklets.
I can't explain exactly 'how' I'm feeling different but I just know that the sober life holds a lot more appeal to me than the drunk one.
I'm realistic enough to know (and remember from last time) that over the next few weeks I'll have days when this adrenaline rush dips and I feel tired and the cravings start niggling but I want this more than I've ever wanted anything (well, except for a house in the sun somewhere :-D )
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