Class Of January 2016 Support Thread part 3
Member
Join Date: Jan 2016
Location: Melbourne
Posts: 120
Oh so shamefully I admit I am back to day 2.
My last drink was on Sunday morning at approx. 8.30am, yep, there was about 3 glasses left in the bottle from the night before (when I had one and a half bottles of wine). Upon waking I felt anxious, got up and sculled the wine. Good one Lisa. I know what I am doing, and the ****** feelings that lead me to do it. Its a case of stopping and staying stopped. I feel bad posting that this has happened, sorry to be a downer on a pretty positive group.
It was three nights of drinking, which started of by me not having any cravings for 5 days, but then someone at work looked at and spoke to me in a way which I felt was critical, and that whole "I'm not good enough, no one likes me" tirade of thoughts descended on me. So I went and bought wine. And it could have ended there but it didn't. But at least its stopped now. I think a part of me thinks I'm just not capable or deserving of a better happier life.
Well done to everyone who is doing well. And well done everyone who is struggling but trying - and lets be honest by logging on here we are all trying.... to change, and be better, more whole.
My last drink was on Sunday morning at approx. 8.30am, yep, there was about 3 glasses left in the bottle from the night before (when I had one and a half bottles of wine). Upon waking I felt anxious, got up and sculled the wine. Good one Lisa. I know what I am doing, and the ****** feelings that lead me to do it. Its a case of stopping and staying stopped. I feel bad posting that this has happened, sorry to be a downer on a pretty positive group.
It was three nights of drinking, which started of by me not having any cravings for 5 days, but then someone at work looked at and spoke to me in a way which I felt was critical, and that whole "I'm not good enough, no one likes me" tirade of thoughts descended on me. So I went and bought wine. And it could have ended there but it didn't. But at least its stopped now. I think a part of me thinks I'm just not capable or deserving of a better happier life.
Well done to everyone who is doing well. And well done everyone who is struggling but trying - and lets be honest by logging on here we are all trying.... to change, and be better, more whole.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2016
Location: Melbourne
Posts: 120
Thanks Dee.
I am going to read your plan information. Obviously my current plan is insufficient.
And remembering that my self esteem might feel pretty low when I crave a drink, but it sure as hell is rock bottom after I go and have one.
I am going to read your plan information. Obviously my current plan is insufficient.
And remembering that my self esteem might feel pretty low when I crave a drink, but it sure as hell is rock bottom after I go and have one.
Silly- I am so glad you tried acupuncture- I did it years ago for my binge eating/drinking. It didn't keep me from doing either but it was so relaxing! Any time relieving our stress is a good time! Is this the new therapist you were talking about? It sounds like he had some good insight and advice. Also, I love that you color with crayons. I bought an adult coloring book a while back but haven't been using it. Thanks for the reminder.
Thump, that is great about the meetings. It really inspires me to check one out in the area. What are the chat meetings like here? I wish they had ones during the day, I am in bed by 9pm!
JL- you are right, we all have our problems. I hope the medicine can help her feel better.
PHRD- Way to go on 4 days! And down 5 lbs is an added bonus I am like you and stick to all natural products for the home and my body. Feels like the right thing to do
Olivia- I want to hear all about these books you are reading! Sounds right up my alley.
Angel- looking too far ahead can be overwhelming indeed. Focus on the baby step, the here and now. The rest always falls into place and in reality, there is no future- only the present. You are doing great!
Thump, that is great about the meetings. It really inspires me to check one out in the area. What are the chat meetings like here? I wish they had ones during the day, I am in bed by 9pm!
JL- you are right, we all have our problems. I hope the medicine can help her feel better.
PHRD- Way to go on 4 days! And down 5 lbs is an added bonus I am like you and stick to all natural products for the home and my body. Feels like the right thing to do
Olivia- I want to hear all about these books you are reading! Sounds right up my alley.
Angel- looking too far ahead can be overwhelming indeed. Focus on the baby step, the here and now. The rest always falls into place and in reality, there is no future- only the present. You are doing great!
Today is Day 2 and I'm still a tiny bit hungover. I'm already looking forward to getting good sleep tonight. Today I'm feeling annoyed with myself that I have to start this process of getting sober, feeling normal, etc over. But I do, so here goes.
Good morning everyone. Been fighting a bit of a cold these last few days and while I thought I had kicked it, yesterday left me feeling a little loopy. I also started a new med (Wellbutrin) for my depression since the Zoloft I have been taking has made me fat and lazy (and I still believe it led to my alcohol cravings, but that's another story.)
Amazing how easy it is to get a prescription these days. I just went to a new doctor, told her I had tried it in the past and viola- she gave it to me. I am just hoping for some more energy and motivation, and of course weight loss.
The only way to lose weight on the zoloft is by doing low carb which I am on day 8 of. It's definitely working but it takes about 5 days to adjust. I am just proud of myself for not only sticking to my sobriety (day 15 over here) but also sticking to this diet, which is 21 days. I haven't been able to do that since last June.
Feeling a bit numb this morning, not sure what is going on. I have been having some whacked out, intense dreams but then wake up feeling blah. I am sure once the kids are up my mood will change.
Happy, safe and sober hump day everyone!
Quote of the day:
Amazing how easy it is to get a prescription these days. I just went to a new doctor, told her I had tried it in the past and viola- she gave it to me. I am just hoping for some more energy and motivation, and of course weight loss.
The only way to lose weight on the zoloft is by doing low carb which I am on day 8 of. It's definitely working but it takes about 5 days to adjust. I am just proud of myself for not only sticking to my sobriety (day 15 over here) but also sticking to this diet, which is 21 days. I haven't been able to do that since last June.
Feeling a bit numb this morning, not sure what is going on. I have been having some whacked out, intense dreams but then wake up feeling blah. I am sure once the kids are up my mood will change.
Happy, safe and sober hump day everyone!
Quote of the day:
Welcome back Optimist
I really encourage you, and anyone else returning to read the last couple of pages of this thread - there's been some really great support and good ideas being shared.
There are healthier and more positive ways to relax - all it takes is a little time and effort to look around and find those alternatives and make some new decisions
Again I really want to emphasise to everyone - if you're wavering about drinking again, post here first and get a shot of sanity against the crazy
we all can do this
D
I really encourage you, and anyone else returning to read the last couple of pages of this thread - there's been some really great support and good ideas being shared.
There are healthier and more positive ways to relax - all it takes is a little time and effort to look around and find those alternatives and make some new decisions
Again I really want to emphasise to everyone - if you're wavering about drinking again, post here first and get a shot of sanity against the crazy
we all can do this
D
Acupuncture surprised me. It was recommended as treatment for anxiety. It was good, but some of it seemed hokey. The guy kept feeling up my wrist, while doing something with something on his belt, and watching something on the desk, and then making notes. It was strange.
But the things he said after that were right on.
1) I need to slow my brain down. He said of thought activity, on a scale of zero to ten, with zero being perfect, I am at 100. He told me to start living one hour at a time (he does not know I am in recovery). Thoughts of the past and the future are no-no's. Whenever possible, I am supposed to refuse to entertain thoughts of anything but the hour I am in. He mentioned practicing mindfulness a couple times.
2) He said I eat too sporadically and eat the wrong things. He recommended 900 calories of plant starch (potatoes, bread, rice, corn, legumes), and 5 servings of fruit (bananas, oranges, red grapes) per day. The rest should be protein, fat and veggies of my choice.
Then he did the acupuncture on my front. I thought he was just giving me little pokes and was surprised to see needles sticking out. He left them in for around 25 minutes or so. Then he did my back and I fell asleep on the table. It is surprisingly relaxing. Woke up feeling like a million bucks!
The feeling of being calm and rested is sticking with me. I stopped running around and am happy to just stay home tonight and cozy up to a book. It makes no sense whatsoever, but I cannot argue with the results. Acupuncture is impressive.
I am giving the diet a go too.
It will be cool to stay home tonight and catch up on SR as well.
But the things he said after that were right on.
1) I need to slow my brain down. He said of thought activity, on a scale of zero to ten, with zero being perfect, I am at 100. He told me to start living one hour at a time (he does not know I am in recovery). Thoughts of the past and the future are no-no's. Whenever possible, I am supposed to refuse to entertain thoughts of anything but the hour I am in. He mentioned practicing mindfulness a couple times.
2) He said I eat too sporadically and eat the wrong things. He recommended 900 calories of plant starch (potatoes, bread, rice, corn, legumes), and 5 servings of fruit (bananas, oranges, red grapes) per day. The rest should be protein, fat and veggies of my choice.
Then he did the acupuncture on my front. I thought he was just giving me little pokes and was surprised to see needles sticking out. He left them in for around 25 minutes or so. Then he did my back and I fell asleep on the table. It is surprisingly relaxing. Woke up feeling like a million bucks!
The feeling of being calm and rested is sticking with me. I stopped running around and am happy to just stay home tonight and cozy up to a book. It makes no sense whatsoever, but I cannot argue with the results. Acupuncture is impressive.
I am giving the diet a go too.
It will be cool to stay home tonight and catch up on SR as well.
Never thought I would be one to go to meetings either but yet after my 3rd one, I am hooked.!
Welcome back Optimist
I really encourage you, and anyone else returning to read the last couple of pages of this thread - there's been some really great support and good ideas being shared.
There are healthier and more positive ways to relax - all it takes is a little time and effort to look around and find those alternatives and make some new decisions
Again I really want to emphasise to everyone - if you're wavering about drinking again, post here first and get a shot of sanity against the crazy
we all can do this
D
I really encourage you, and anyone else returning to read the last couple of pages of this thread - there's been some really great support and good ideas being shared.
There are healthier and more positive ways to relax - all it takes is a little time and effort to look around and find those alternatives and make some new decisions
Again I really want to emphasise to everyone - if you're wavering about drinking again, post here first and get a shot of sanity against the crazy
we all can do this
D
Sut, you will figure it out. If it is not something you must deal with today, you are smart to keep the focus on you for today. Congats on Day 3!
Thump, you are doing great! Great job on dissing the AV.
Tink, it used to happen when I was drinking. It has not happened for years. There is a thing called the Vagal manuevuer that usually worked to stop it. It did not make a dent in it last night. One time in ER, they had to inject something that stopped my heart for just a sec and forced it to reset.
Dee, cause is not unknown. They suspect it starts with miscommunication between in the brain and the heart. But when the heart gets going that fast, it does not completely empty of blood. Since it then cannot take in all the blood it normally would, the body reads that as lack of 02, and it works even harder. Vicious cycle. I took 50 MG of Atenlol and I think that is what stopped it this time.
There is not going to be a next time, not if I can help it.
Thump, you are doing great! Great job on dissing the AV.
Tink, it used to happen when I was drinking. It has not happened for years. There is a thing called the Vagal manuevuer that usually worked to stop it. It did not make a dent in it last night. One time in ER, they had to inject something that stopped my heart for just a sec and forced it to reset.
Dee, cause is not unknown. They suspect it starts with miscommunication between in the brain and the heart. But when the heart gets going that fast, it does not completely empty of blood. Since it then cannot take in all the blood it normally would, the body reads that as lack of 02, and it works even harder. Vicious cycle. I took 50 MG of Atenlol and I think that is what stopped it this time.
There is not going to be a next time, not if I can help it.
Good morning. Trying to gather strength to take my boy to school. Anxiety is overwhelming. I had vivid dreams and anxiety since 5am.
I had to remind myself that it's day 2 and this will get better. But I'm feeling really overwhelmed right now.
I had to remind myself that it's day 2 and this will get better. But I'm feeling really overwhelmed right now.
Gibby, I love that name. Thanks for the love and light.
Lisa, Strongbird, Sean and Optimist, welcome back!
Nic, you are rocking on meetings! That is great to see.
Odelle, you are a real gift to us. Everytime I see the pic of that kitty, I know I am going to like what follows.
Patricia, it really will get better. Please hang in there. Anxiety is tough to get through, and just exhausting to fight, especially with poor sleep. I hope your day improves. Keep posting. I love to see your avatar pop up. It is cute as heck.
Nic, I am the eternal cynic, but I swear it had a powerful effect. I will give it another go in a couple weeks and see if the effect stays the same.
OK, I have to go do the dreaded job of paying bills and have a second therapy appointment this morning.
I hope everyone has a good morning, sober and clean!
Lisa, Strongbird, Sean and Optimist, welcome back!
Nic, you are rocking on meetings! That is great to see.
Odelle, you are a real gift to us. Everytime I see the pic of that kitty, I know I am going to like what follows.
Patricia, it really will get better. Please hang in there. Anxiety is tough to get through, and just exhausting to fight, especially with poor sleep. I hope your day improves. Keep posting. I love to see your avatar pop up. It is cute as heck.
Nic, I am the eternal cynic, but I swear it had a powerful effect. I will give it another go in a couple weeks and see if the effect stays the same.
OK, I have to go do the dreaded job of paying bills and have a second therapy appointment this morning.
I hope everyone has a good morning, sober and clean!
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