Mark1014

Phoebe, you ask a good question about kids today. I'm so thankful that I was more ignorant of so much when I was young. So many sitcoms/Disney shows portray kids as the adult savvy members of the household. The last decade or so has seen a drastic change in how and how much young people socialize. I, for one, wasn't prepared to guide my kids through something that I don't really engage with apart from here. Social media has to be dealt with, no getting around it.

Home used to provide a break for kids from some of the inevitable pressures of the teen years. But these days kids can't catch a break. I want my kids to be well rounded, educated, socially engaged folks...but there is a time and place. Many may disagree with me, but I think it is proper to shelter kids and allow them to bloom as they are prepared. Engaged parents are the best judge of when and how some bridges are crossed but it's terribly difficult to not be bypassed. It's just too much 24/7 stuff for kids imo, but I dare say I can't see how it will change.

I encourage anyone with very young children to limit their participation as long as possible in too much cyber time. Ironic as I sit here typing in on a site that has been such a blessing to me. Oh for simpler times!

That's why I like playing in the dirt. 😊

Mark1014

Hope you made it ok today Arbor, was likely a long day for you.

Arbor

Hey thanks Mark. Made it fine alright.8)

I slept good last night (which also means the baby did) and today wasn't a struggle. I'm so used to terrible sleep or lack there of that when I get a decent stretch I'm good to go.

Sorry to hear about all that Phoebe. I can't imagine having that talk with one of mine. Gotta be tough. Don't think my folks ever brought that one up. I'm not so sure it's more prevalent now? Maybe we just hear about it more due to all the outlets?? I say that cause I really don't know. My kids are little and I'm stuck in baby land. Bottom line is though kids gotta know that suicide isn't an option.

Australian day! Sounds fun!

Mark1014

Glad you just rolled with it today Arbor.

Just back from a twilight woodland walk and was greeted by the first spring peeper serenade of the season! Got to wear my black wader type boots too. Love it.

I think I may have stunted my little one's growth just now. She's headed out for her first 'dance technique' class and I told her how I'm gonna bust up in there and share my 80s moves with the class! Sounds like a great idea to me.

SoberLeigh

How did she react, Mark????

BrighterDayz

It's our duty to embarrass our kids Mark. She's secretly wondering if you were serious.

Mark1014

Yep, she pretends to be put off, but likes my kidding. Now if I REALLY did it, she would melt!.......so where did I put that Footloose cassette?

SoberLeigh

LOL, Mark. Footloose; she would definitely melt.

SoberLeigh

Goodnight, all; see you tomorrow.

Arbor

Cassette? Your gonna have to find the deck first, Mark.

Briar

Phoebe - so heartbreaking...

Dee74

I'm really sorry for your loss Phoebe.

Thanks everyone for the Oz day wishes - I was joking when I said heatstroke yesterday but I think I actually had been - I woke with a fever - not hospital worthy but more than usual temp and a really raging headache.

The day was very hot and humid again but we had some rain this afternoon and it's helped the atmosphere a lot.

I've also been well hydrated today and feel a lot better. See what the night brings

D

venuscat

Glad you're on the way to OK Dee. ♥

BrighterDayz

Phoebe, not sure if you know about this, Project Semicolon? Project Semicolon - Project Semicolon | projectsemicolon.com

MISSION STATEMENT
PROJECT SEMICOLON IS A GLOBAL NON-PROFIT MOVEMENT DEDICATED TO PRESENTING HOPE AND LOVE FOR THOSE WHO ARE STRUGGLING WITH MENTAL ILLNESS, SUICIDE, ADDICTION AND SELF-INJURY. PROJECT SEMICOLON EXISTS TO ENCOURAGE, LOVE AND INSPIRE.

STAY STRONG; LOVE ENDLESSLY; CHANGE LIVES

I love semicolons; they are my favorite punctuation marks and I particularly like the symbolism here that the story is not finished. We need more acceptance and tolerance for mental health issues for sure.

phoebe64

BD, I do not know of that project. I will look at it. We have a very open dialogue about suicide and mental health in our home, or, at least I do with my daughter, and I try with my son, who is not very into talking feelings. Husband is a clam.

Thanks for the info.

Briar

Phoebe it's really good that your family can talk openly about mental illness. It's a taboo topic for many, and stigma is a huge barrier. I'm pretty nervous about starting that dialogue with my daughter. When she's old enough, I will tell her about my problems and our family history of mental illness. She has to know about it, and she needs to know what to do if she starts having symptoms herself. It breaks my heart to think that she may struggle with mental illness one day, I don't like to think about it. I'm fearful that telling her about it might freak her out, and I think I will choose carefully what information I give her initially. I want to reach a place of open dialogue, but I will have to feel it out. Right now I'm feeling a ton of shame which is affecting my thinking about this issue. I've got plenty of time before I need to worry about starting that conversation, and hopefully I'll be able to do it with a strong recovery to stand on. I don't feel like a good example right now just coming off a major episode. It's so sad that the young girl you knew didn't tell anyone she was struggling, but I understand. The shame of having a mental illness can be debilitating and can easily steer your actions when you are ill. I would love to one day participate in an awareness project like Semicolon, but honestly I haven't come to terms with my own illness enough to put it out there in the open or to fully accept myself with it. Mental illness still really pisses me off and scares me, but one day I hope we can all come to a place of understanding and acceptance.

phoebe64

Briar, as much as I am open about dd and with dd, I struggle about being open about my own struggles, due to the stigma still present in my own generation, and my elders' generations. But there is a strong wave among dd's peers, and she is part of it, where kids are talking. Our HS has twice now hosted a young man from Canada, who speaks about his suicidal thoughts and depression. he pretty much talks about it, simply to get kids talking about it. He had a TED talk. His name is Kevin Breel. Dd actually waited in line to pose for a picture with him, after his talk. She was glowing! She was sweating and nervous, but looked him square in the eye and shook his hand, and said, "I know what you have been through." It was very empowering for her, to own it, and be in a place where she is caring for herself, and not ashamed, and he is doing great things to bring that to kids. He does not give much self help advice, other than to *tell someone, talk, remove the shame and stigma.*

So, I try to do that with dd. And she talks to her friends. But there is a huge gap, generationally. I do not feel like I can openly disclose my struggles with depression in my family, or with my friends. Not in any big way.

If ever you want to talk, I am here. There is a colorful family history on my mother's side of the family. Heredity cannot be denied. I actually worry more about my son, who is pretty closed up about talking about feelings, and has some ticks and anxiety. He is only 12. My daughter is so used to dealing with it, and taking her meds, and telling me when she needs more, etc... She responds very well to support and help. It makes her feel validated. It only seems to make my son feel shame. Boys still are conditioned to feel tough and stuff feelings.

Briar

That is wonderful that her generation is more accepting. I'm sort of in the middle where it's more in the open, but there is definitely still stigma among my peers. I hope I will be able to speak openly with my daughter in a way that will be useful to her.

SoberLeigh

Hope you continue to feel better, Dee; take it easy, dear friend.

SoberLeigh

Have a good day, Octsobers.