Class of November 2015 Part 9
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Canada
Posts: 1,075
Originally Posted by Dee74 
My advice is focus on yourself Patricia. Whatever problems your husband may have, you can't change him....
but you have an excellent chance of changing yourself and becoming who you want to be
D
but you have an excellent chance of changing yourself and becoming who you want to be
D
Member
Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: Somerset
Posts: 933
Keep fighting Patricia, midlife crisis for men is very real and of course can be very disruptive in relationships.
Snowvelvet, you're in the best possible place you can be to kick start your life again. Don't look back, look forward; stay sober and anything can happen. Life isn't an upward trajectory, it's a series of peaks and troughs.
Andy - I'm loving your resolve and positivity.
Today is my day 73, significant for no other reason than it's the longest I've gone without alcohol for 35 years. That makes me cringe to see that written down.
I occasionally romanticise a pint of IPA with friends but I dismiss this as my AV. On the whole I feel like a non-drinker and I certainly don't feel like I'll ever drink again.
Best wishes to all of the class, I really appreciate you all. It's difficult to respond to all the posts but I read them all. It's a huge help to me to feel part of something.
Snowvelvet, you're in the best possible place you can be to kick start your life again. Don't look back, look forward; stay sober and anything can happen. Life isn't an upward trajectory, it's a series of peaks and troughs.
Andy - I'm loving your resolve and positivity.
Today is my day 73, significant for no other reason than it's the longest I've gone without alcohol for 35 years. That makes me cringe to see that written down.
I occasionally romanticise a pint of IPA with friends but I dismiss this as my AV. On the whole I feel like a non-drinker and I certainly don't feel like I'll ever drink again.
Best wishes to all of the class, I really appreciate you all. It's difficult to respond to all the posts but I read them all. It's a huge help to me to feel part of something.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 123
Thank you for your kind post, Dallow.
We're pretty much the same age. I'm 33 and a half lol.
I know what you mean about the career conversations. I used to travel round Europe and had to go to the US as well. It fed my ego. I really miss it though.
I have to be honest, so I will admit here that I did drink. I felt too damn low. I also know that I need to pick myself up and focus on the future and applying for roles, which is what I've been doing this morning. I won't say it was all those days wasted - it wasn't. I will be straight back into meetings.
Otherwise, I will be straight back in a psychiatric ward. Drink and I don't mix very well. Although, being sober, I realise that I wasn't dealing with feelings either. I just kept thinking I should turn it over. Instead that meant nothing changed, I was in limbo.
Patricia, I really feel for you.
Class, I bloody love you all. This is such an amazing resource and I really feel like I have people to help me through. It may be words on the screen, but I can see you all out there.
Kxx
We're pretty much the same age. I'm 33 and a half lol.
I know what you mean about the career conversations. I used to travel round Europe and had to go to the US as well. It fed my ego. I really miss it though.
I have to be honest, so I will admit here that I did drink. I felt too damn low. I also know that I need to pick myself up and focus on the future and applying for roles, which is what I've been doing this morning. I won't say it was all those days wasted - it wasn't. I will be straight back into meetings.
Otherwise, I will be straight back in a psychiatric ward. Drink and I don't mix very well. Although, being sober, I realise that I wasn't dealing with feelings either. I just kept thinking I should turn it over. Instead that meant nothing changed, I was in limbo.
Patricia, I really feel for you.
Class, I bloody love you all. This is such an amazing resource and I really feel like I have people to help me through. It may be words on the screen, but I can see you all out there.
Kxx
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: deepest england
Posts: 1,119
Class, I bloody love you all. This is such an amazing resource and I really feel like I have people to help me through. It may be words on the screen, but I can see you all out there.
Kxx[/QUOTE]
I agree... I love this class and u are all helping me all the time... I do wonder what u all looks like, where u live and stuff... like in a good book, I have characterised u all!!! That's plenty good enough, I just hope you'd be pleased😀
Kxx[/QUOTE]
I agree... I love this class and u are all helping me all the time... I do wonder what u all looks like, where u live and stuff... like in a good book, I have characterised u all!!! That's plenty good enough, I just hope you'd be pleased😀
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: deepest england
Posts: 1,119
Originally Posted by patricia68
I'm scared I'm too far gone to become the person I want to be Dee
The ideas about your husband sound like they may be spot on. .. I can see that in mine too... inconsistent behaviour and the feeling I am not good enough. After my major screw up he has been trying hard.... and I can see they guy I love in there somewhere. ... can u still find your guy or has he moved out all together. I am trying to ignore the crappy actions and just see the positive and the good.... sobriety is helping. I feel so.much better and hate myself less, so perhaps that is making him more happy too.... it would take pages and pages to work it all out huh...
Just for you... can u find something else to do instead of drink when he does that to you. Chocolate. Fag. Vanilla chai. Scream... dunno just something else. ...
I really feel for you... xx
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 625
Good morning all! Day 13 here! I've been reading through the posts and catching up. Congrats to those who have reached milestones! Regarding a mid-life crisis...I think I may be going through one. I don't think the crisis is showing in my actions toward my husband but I do think it affects my binge drinking. I feel like I am on s better path this time. The positives of not drinking are outweighing the desire to drink. This is good. I have to keep these thoughts fresh in my mind. Coming up on another weekend..I passed on one social event with my husband and some friends that is scheduled for Friday night. I am trying to make non drink related plans for Saturday. Sunday we are planning to go to a local bar/restaurant to watch the playoff football games...I will have a plan and will stick to it. I will likely check in multiple times during the day.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2015
Posts: 734
Same goes Tufty, said to the wife this morning that this is now 61 days and the longest I've gone for nearly 30 years without a drink, did January through to the last weekend of Feb for fitness last year and a month here and there for the same. Also agree with you re this class being majorly beneficial and feeling a part of something.
Ha ha like the way you have us all characterised Enfin, I know the current me is much nicer than the old me anyway :-)
Ha ha like the way you have us all characterised Enfin, I know the current me is much nicer than the old me anyway :-)
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Midwest, USA
Posts: 1,551
Hi all, checking in.. this would be 60 days had I not drank once on Christmas. 17 since then. Back in school and busy busy. Today is a short day because we are not going to the hospital for clinical until week 3. Just trying to will myself out of bed. :') with you all. Keep going!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: Augusta, GA
Posts: 888
Originally Posted by tufty13
Keep fighting Patricia, midlife crisis for men is very real and of course can be very disruptive in relationships.
Snowvelvet, you're in the best possible place you can be to kick start your life again. Don't look back, look forward; stay sober and anything can happen. Life isn't an upward trajectory, it's a series of peaks and troughs.
Andy - I'm loving your resolve and positivity.
Today is my day 73, significant for no other reason than it's the longest I've gone without alcohol for 35 years. That makes me cringe to see that written down.
I occasionally romanticise a pint of IPA with friends but I dismiss this as my AV. On the whole I feel like a non-drinker and I certainly don't feel like I'll ever drink again.
Best wishes to all of the class, I really appreciate you all. It's difficult to respond to all the posts but I read them all. It's a huge help to me to feel part of something.
Snowvelvet, you're in the best possible place you can be to kick start your life again. Don't look back, look forward; stay sober and anything can happen. Life isn't an upward trajectory, it's a series of peaks and troughs.
Andy - I'm loving your resolve and positivity.
Today is my day 73, significant for no other reason than it's the longest I've gone without alcohol for 35 years. That makes me cringe to see that written down.
I occasionally romanticise a pint of IPA with friends but I dismiss this as my AV. On the whole I feel like a non-drinker and I certainly don't feel like I'll ever drink again.
Best wishes to all of the class, I really appreciate you all. It's difficult to respond to all the posts but I read them all. It's a huge help to me to feel part of something.
I have a 5O miler this weekend and just had someone mention to me on Facebook how we get to drink beer when its over! The craft beer scene is so prevalent in this sport! I'm already planning to bring my own craft root beer and ginger ale, what I did last year when I was sober! I did, for a fleeting moment romanticize that first beer, but you and I both know it wouldn't be only one! Now I'm romanticizing the thought of that first ginger ale and enjoying a nice cigar at the end of the race and starting a new, healthier tradition for the trail running scene!
Congrats on your 73 days and here's to many, many more!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: USA
Posts: 5,250
Originally Posted by enfinthechange
Class, I bloody love you all. This is such an amazing resource and I really feel like I have people to help me through. It may be words on the screen, but I can see you all out there. Kxx
Ha ha what do you think "I" look like enfin??? It would be fun for us to all describe what we think each other looks like! :-)
Member
Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: USA
Posts: 5,250
Hi guys! I just had a chance to read all the posts. The last 36 hours have been super busy! I'm tired!
@Odelle-Absolutely sugar can trigger alcohol cravings! Sugar & nicotine are the 2 worse triggers. I'm so glad you are still working hard to change your life & I'm glad you're back!
@enfin-keep up the great work!!!
@snowvelvet-are you feeling better today? I know you were having a rough day yesterday. :-(
And I agree with Ultradad about trying to find some sober friends. I like AA. I went to a meeting this morning & feel sooo much better! UPDATE: I just read your next post in the thread & you said you are going to about 6 meetings a week. Are you meeting anyone you like or relate to? UPDATE 2: just read your post from this morning. I'm sorry you slipped. Don't beat yourself up. Just learn from it & move on. (((Snow)))
@learntofly-11 days is great! I bet your glad you don't need to worry about recycling anymore! Clink Clank Clunk!!! Haha
@Jemma-hey! Great to hear from you! You doing ok today?
@Supertired-congrats on 48 days!!! Try to be careful about isolating. That's dangerous. Do you go to AA or have anyone you can really talk to about everything?
@Dallow-the best part of your life is just beginning! Hang on for a great ride!!! :-)
@SoberMarathon-hey!!! Good to hear from you! Good luck in counseling! I have my 4th session Friday & it's really helping.
@Patricia-I hope that info that Odelle gave you on "male midlife crisis" is helping you! Maybe this is the answer you've been searching for! But I agree with Dee...keep focusing on yourself too. Hugs & prayers! P.S. You are NEVER too far gone! Dee said it, "so long as we're breathing...it's never too late!"
@LastChance-50 days!!! Great job!!!
@Tufty-73 days!!! Amazing!!!
@Rah-Sunday sounds fun but be sure to have LOTS of tools to fight you AV for that night & several days after! (((Rah))) :-)
@RedAndy-61 days!!! Your liver probably loves you! Hahahaha. All of our livers are probably happy! You're doing great!
@blackbird-hey! Don't worry about what "would" have been. Everything is happening exactly how it should and you're doing great! Xo
Have a great rest of the day everyone!!!
@Odelle-Absolutely sugar can trigger alcohol cravings! Sugar & nicotine are the 2 worse triggers. I'm so glad you are still working hard to change your life & I'm glad you're back!
@enfin-keep up the great work!!!
@snowvelvet-are you feeling better today? I know you were having a rough day yesterday. :-(
And I agree with Ultradad about trying to find some sober friends. I like AA. I went to a meeting this morning & feel sooo much better! UPDATE: I just read your next post in the thread & you said you are going to about 6 meetings a week. Are you meeting anyone you like or relate to? UPDATE 2: just read your post from this morning. I'm sorry you slipped. Don't beat yourself up. Just learn from it & move on. (((Snow)))
@learntofly-11 days is great! I bet your glad you don't need to worry about recycling anymore! Clink Clank Clunk!!! Haha
@Jemma-hey! Great to hear from you! You doing ok today?
@Supertired-congrats on 48 days!!! Try to be careful about isolating. That's dangerous. Do you go to AA or have anyone you can really talk to about everything?
@Dallow-the best part of your life is just beginning! Hang on for a great ride!!! :-)
@SoberMarathon-hey!!! Good to hear from you! Good luck in counseling! I have my 4th session Friday & it's really helping.
@Patricia-I hope that info that Odelle gave you on "male midlife crisis" is helping you! Maybe this is the answer you've been searching for! But I agree with Dee...keep focusing on yourself too. Hugs & prayers! P.S. You are NEVER too far gone! Dee said it, "so long as we're breathing...it's never too late!"
@LastChance-50 days!!! Great job!!!
@Tufty-73 days!!! Amazing!!!
@Rah-Sunday sounds fun but be sure to have LOTS of tools to fight you AV for that night & several days after! (((Rah))) :-)
@RedAndy-61 days!!! Your liver probably loves you! Hahahaha. All of our livers are probably happy! You're doing great!
@blackbird-hey! Don't worry about what "would" have been. Everything is happening exactly how it should and you're doing great! Xo
Have a great rest of the day everyone!!!
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Join Date: Jan 2015
Posts: 397
Hi everyone. I love our class too.
I'm doing ok. My OH and I are committed to working things out. Lots of changes ahead.
Counseling in the works.
Patricia, your posts resonate so much with me. Try to stay positive.
My boss called me into her office today to tell me she was paying me for a day I didn't work (long story...I was called off but shouldn't have been) Only you guys can imagine the fear in my heart when she said she needed to talk to me privately (after a recent bender). Oh the horrors. Instead I'm being paid for not even being there.
Not worth the paranoia folks. Stay sober. So when your boss calls you in to reward you, you don't have a panic attack.
I'm doing ok. My OH and I are committed to working things out. Lots of changes ahead.
Counseling in the works.
Patricia, your posts resonate so much with me. Try to stay positive.
My boss called me into her office today to tell me she was paying me for a day I didn't work (long story...I was called off but shouldn't have been) Only you guys can imagine the fear in my heart when she said she needed to talk to me privately (after a recent bender). Oh the horrors. Instead I'm being paid for not even being there.
Not worth the paranoia folks. Stay sober. So when your boss calls you in to reward you, you don't have a panic attack.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: deepest england
Posts: 1,119
Originally Posted by KiKi0615
I agree... I love this class and u are all helping me all the time... I do wonder what u all looks like, where u live and stuff... like in a good book, I have characterised u all!!! That's plenty good enough, I just hope you'd be pleaseddde00
I think you'd be glamorous, with long legs , an amazing smile and a personality that makes people want to be near you and make u happy! I think u live in a big white house with a balcony and vines with flowers and blue sky...
but don't forget, like a book... everyone will have a different pic! All gorgeous for all of us I'm sure!!! And no one has an overflowing recycling bin hahaha...
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