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Class Of January 2016 Support Thread

Old 01-02-2016, 12:05 AM
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Welcome all you guys

like I said commit to staying sober today - 24 hours - everyone can do that.
Then you back up the commitment tomorrow...and again, and again...

There's no magic or wishing involved...just determination and hard work

D
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Old 01-02-2016, 12:26 AM
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Good morning everyone from the UK. 2nd January and I'm grateful it's a Saturday. I hate going back to work the day after new year.

I want to put a plan of action into place this year. I want to sort out my mood and look after myself better. I have a goal to run a half marathon this year. I did my first 10km run last year. I was supposed to start my training over Christmas but drink got in the way and I am still not strong enough physically to do it so it will have to wait. Hopefully by Monday I will be ok and can get to the gym after work. I'd love to be able to meditate but I can never find the motivation to find a time to do it. I think that's one thing that would be really beneficial. I want to change my diet so that it helps my mental health rather than making me feel worse. I need to research what foods will help with that.

Yesterday I went to my mums for a new years day meal/party. We go every year and every year my day is spoiled because I have a massive hangover or I am recovering from a binge which takes me a good 3/4 days to get over these days. Yesterday my heart was racing, I hadn't slept well and when I did was plagued by sweating and nightmares, I couldn't taste my food properly and I was paranoid about what everyone was thinking about me. Next year I want to have got though the year without a binge and be free from those feelings of worthlessness and hopelessness and starting the new year under a cloud.

Today I am getting my decorations down ready to start the New Year afresh. I'm hoping to watch a couple of films later and tomorrow will be getting everyone ready for the new week back in work/school.

What does everyone else have planned today? What are you putting in place to get help you get through this?
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Old 01-02-2016, 12:39 AM
  # 43 (permalink)  
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I hope you all have a good weekend.
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Old 01-02-2016, 12:51 AM
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I hope you're doing ok right now, ss.

D
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Old 01-02-2016, 12:52 AM
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[QUOTE=charliesworld;5719042

Today I am getting my decorations down ready to start the New Year afresh. I'm hoping to watch a couple of films later and tomorrow will be getting everyone ready for the new week back in work/school.

What does everyone else have planned today? What are you putting in place to get help you get through this?[/QUOTE]

Same here. Taking the kids bowling today then seeing eldest back off to University. Decorations down tomorrow, house cleaned and kids sorted for school week.

Regular check ins on SR too. Helps to keep my AV quiet. Good luck Charlie we can do this!
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Old 01-02-2016, 12:56 AM
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can i join here too ???
day 0
Oh and happy new year everyone
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Old 01-02-2016, 01:02 AM
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Not to take from everyone but Im not. Just pretend to be okay.
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Old 01-02-2016, 01:08 AM
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at least you're here ss - that's a good thing.

welcome to you too lily76

D
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Old 01-02-2016, 01:14 AM
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SS I hope you feel better soon.
If we stick together this will be easier than trying to do it alone.
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Old 01-02-2016, 01:14 AM
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Originally Posted by suicideseason View Post
Not to take from everyone but Im not. Just pretend to be okay.
We all pretend to be ok, you are not alone. What are you doing today to keep the bad thoughts away do you have a plan?

When it all gets too much for me I come here and read. Helps me to know I am not alone, that others have the same issues and how they are dealing with them. Stay strong one day at a time.
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Old 01-02-2016, 06:41 AM
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Going back and re-reading posts and thinking through things this morning.

I have found in the past couple years, that I have started drinking again out of anticipation of drinking again; basically the opposite of not drinking "just for today."

First foremost, I need to not take that first drink.

The anticipation has been tough though. I have found that there is really only one trigger, my own thoughts. These are thoughts of loosely linked concepts of some future situation where I feel it would be really sad if I couldn't drink. In reality, it would be great to not drink, but somewhere in my head are ideas of drinking and getting away with it, life being good enough and not needing to change, that I will need to drink in some future situation to relax or fit in. It's never present, it's always some future conceptual AV BS, and it's not the truth. Being sober, when I have been sober, has been wonderful.

zerothehero posted a link to a free mindfulness course in his 2 year story recently. (Online MBSR (free)) I'm started on that course, in part because I'm rarely in the present. I'm a constant day-dreamer, worrier and sometimes obsessor over things that haven't happened. This will be a part of my plan, live in the present. I also think techniques of AVRT fits in well with the concept, if I can keep myself in the here and now, place those straying thoughts of future drinking on the "beast" and letting them go. The concept of mindfulness seems to pick up where AVRT leaves off; Instead just saying no to the AV, I want to be saying yes to the things I want to be.
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Old 01-02-2016, 07:08 AM
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Day 2. I spent much time yesterday reading on SR and googling alcoholism. I know this is one day at a time, but I am trying to get my head to see that this is a permanent thing. I've seen "bottom" and I am nowhere near it, but if I don't quit, that's where I will go. Well, one day at a time, and I will add to my plan a goal of actually wanting a life without drink.
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Old 01-02-2016, 07:36 AM
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On day two again. Third time since I decided to quit in November. I did have many sober weeks until last week. I was sober but not happy about it. But I have learned a LOT from these two nights I drank recently. Most importantly that it's not just stopping, but doing the work to stay sober...forever. So I have a serious plan in place, which right now includes throwing everything at this until I find something that will help me to be happy about my sobriety ( and if not completely happy- at least not miserable) so I have an appointment with an addiction counselor on the 12th, I'm going to my first AA meeting today and I've bought the SMART recovery workbook and joined their online community. We do have meetings here three times a week but the location and times will be impossible with my job. So I'll just have to narrow down my plan whe I decide what works.
Day 2 and 3 are pretty hard for me because I usually had a bottle of wine every second or third day. So I have to watch my triggers closely right now so that I don't slide back down the hole. One of my big triggers is when my husband goes to the casino to play poker. He's usually gone for over 14 hours and I'm home alone without a car. Don't get me wrong, I do enjoy some solitude and I have my dogs to keep me company. But I always had a bottle of wine on those nights. Well, despite my asking nicely he is going tonight. So it's going to be a test. I'll be on SR all night.
All Christmas is put away and I've already cleaned the house and doing some laundry. I'm plan on doing a lot of reading later, lots of tea and some Netflix.
Hoping everyone is doing well and I'm hoping with each other's support we can make this a great 2016!
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Old 01-02-2016, 10:45 AM
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Evening gang
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Old 01-02-2016, 10:51 AM
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Day 2 nearly done. A few cravings this evening but checking in here is keeping AV at bay. Planning an early night too.
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Old 01-02-2016, 10:59 AM
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Originally Posted by Jane8 View Post
So I have a serious plan in place, which right now includes throwing everything at this until I find something that will help me to be happy about my sobriety ( and if not completely happy- at least not miserable)
Well said. Great plans. Sounds like you will be fine tonight.
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Old 01-02-2016, 11:36 AM
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Hello again 😀
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Old 01-02-2016, 12:25 PM
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Hello-
Day 7 here... Working on getting my garage cleaned out. I had brought stuff up from the basement for a rummage that never happened. Keeping busy helps the AV stay quiet. I don't go back to work till Tuesday so I'm feeling safe from most of the things that trigger me
:For SS and others who are on the first couple days... It's hard. Really hard. The things that helped me the most was not allowing my self to wallow in shame, guilt and hurt. I aknowledged it, but kept telling myself I would revisit it when I was stronger. Not easy but just keep focusing on pushing it to the side for now. I focused on the basics drinking water, eating and rest. That was all I could muster. Just do what you can and hang on and stay close. I think the biggest reason I relapsed is I was reading here but not posting. Just knowing someone is out there in the same boat as you is very reassuring
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Old 01-02-2016, 12:52 PM
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Hi all, hope everyone's ok and welcome to those who have joined today, 2 Jan 2016. We all deserve a fresh start, let's keep the momentum and chip away at this day by day. I've had an ok day today, decent sleep and lie in. Still having night sweats, but can live with that. Feel a bit heavy headed/lethargic. Was a bit surprised not to hear a whisper from AV at all today, all a bit strange. But it will happen before long, for certain. Enjoyed my first sober Saturday for a good while. Looking forward to a fresh Sunday morning tomorrow, with meaningful family time - no crashing out like a zombie stinking of beer. Caught up on a few posts:-

- charliesworld - I'm totally with you on the plan of action and turning focus to exercise goals. I find it really gives me a sense of added purpose, once I get the momentum! Ironically I always knew that alcohol undermined my past consistency with all gym+running, by blunting my enthusiasm. I'm going to do the Great North Run this year, and using that as one of my main incentives to finally kick the booze forever. Amazing how even the thought of sobriety lifts the spirits and lets life creep back into the room of our aspirations!

- loopylou - It cleared my head getting the decorations down, suppose just the manual task itself was helpful to steer me away from any bad preoccupations. Hope the AV has been under control for you and you have had a fun and sober day.

- ss - keep with us here, one day at a time bud. We only have the moment we occupy now to build from, step by step. Keep SR and any other positive folk in your life right on hand.

- nmd - your description of the mindset which has lead to you drinking again kind of mirrors my own experiences in recent years. In my case I can actually reach a point in sobriety where the obvious "craving" form of AV disappears, but is replaced by a form of conscious pact which I enter into. Like I reach a conclusion that yes, I can live with not drinking, but somehow convince myself that I will conditionally do so anyway to alleviate what I see as boredom. I think I've learned now that this happened because I didn't take action to fill the void left by drinking. That is my main focus this time around. I too have got a lot from AVRT & mindfulness - an area I'm working on.

- benice - as Dee says, your one day at a time approach is the best way to get going. 24 hours, rinse, repeat & trust you'll be stronger. Keep it going.

- Jane - sounds like you are living and learning and have a solid plan as a foundation. I wish you well.
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Old 01-02-2016, 01:18 PM
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Thanks Benice and Clearcut.
I didn't go to an AA meeting today. But I've spent the day doing some " work" on my recovery. I spent 3 hours on the phone coming completely clean to my best friend. What a relief! I need that accountability.
Then I fixed my almost dead PC enough to print out 40 pages of SMART recovery homework and excercises which I will start on after a healthy dinner. Then a Sherlock marathon.
I'm having surprisingly few symptoms today. Considering that I drank much more on NYE than I have in months. Yesterday was hell. But I feel pretty good today.
I hope everyone is having a good, productive day and that the AV is under control.
My beast is very quiet today thank goodness.
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