Dee74

Congrats Thomas and abraxas - and congrats to everyone else hitting a milestone today - marvellous stuff

D

ChickChick

Thanks Dee.
I do need a plan. A much better one that I've come up with in the past. I am going to have to think long and hard on that tomorrow.
I'm off to bed. It's been a long day.

Pixie30f

I am sitting here early in the morning, ready to go to work and I've just had to do something I've never done since I started teaching. I've sent an email to say I can't come in first thing today. The reason is I'm not safe to drive but that's not the one I gave. I had already decided this was going to be Day 1 - there have been a lot over the past six months - but this is a bit of a watershed. We have a gadget that tests the level of alcohol in your blood that I've been using rather a lot recently and it tells me I'm 0.6% at the moment - over the limit - so I'm not risking driving yet. I know I can use the reason I've given to work once but I can't use it again and I don't want to have to. I did this last year, committing myself to 90 days, which ran over Christmas, my birthday, holidays, etc, and I made it to over 200, so I'm committing myself again. This time I don't intend to give in. I started last year without a whole lot of faith in myself but determined not to give up on the 90 days. It worked and it's going to work again. I'm scaring myself like I did last year just before I stopped.

Pix

Soberwolf

Have a great start to week guys

Ali123

Thanks soberwolf - same to you too.

Day 15 today - feeling positive 😀

kellyrally

Hi everyone, through day 1 here and feeling pleased as I've really resisted a strong urge to drink today which I failed to do yesterday so that's progress! Taking it one day at a time x

Highwind

Hello everyone, day 9 today, didn't have time to come on over the weekend but doing well and happy enough. Looking forward to xmas, took my little one to an xmas market last night....all the bright lights had him looking shell shocked by the end.

MissPerfumado

This is my second time here.

In November last year I lasted for about 8 days - my first serious attempt. This will be my second serious attempt. I had to go back to the Class of Nov 2014 to see exactly how long I lasted.

I went to see a doctor today to discuss (1) counselling for breaking off a bad relationship and (2) my problems with alcohol. Discussing my problems with alcohol in a professional setting was very daunting. She was great, but I was very emotional afterward. Admitting my problem out loud is so hard.

I called my mother this morning and told her what I was doing. For the first time I told my mother I am abusing alcohol to cope with my personal problems. It was so hard. I live on my own, 1000s of miles from my family in Melbourne and have done for over 10 years. In that time, I've tried to make them think everything is great but it's not. So I am going to be honest with them all now. Maybe that will make the difference. Tonight, a dear friend asked me to go over so I wouldn't be alone. I'll be frank with her too.

This forum was just such a great support for me last year. It helped me get through the lonely evenings when all I would normally do is drink. Now I am going to use this forum of friendly strangers, and also my friends, and most importantly my family.

I'm tearing up writing this. If I don't fix this now, I will be dead in 5 years - I know it.

I'm fixing up my life. Thrown out the toxic relationship. Planning to move back home next year. I'm not terribly religious but I have been praying right out loud to God to save me this time.

ubntubnt

hiya MP. Welcome to the group. Seems we have some parallels. I also made my first serious attempt to quit and joined the November group last year. Lasted 11 weeks, drank for 9 months and came back and got sober this month. Now two weeks in. Like you I believe this will kill me. I don't feel I have reached a bottom but I also feel that I don't need to. I know I am an alcoholic. I know I need to stop now. Like you I live thousands of miles away from family. I am not to far away from you in China so I know the expat life and what that means.

I think you know what you need to do. Draw a line under it and make a firm commitment to stay sober. Avoid bars and any "friends" that were mostly drinking buddies. Come here every day and post and read around. Attend AA if you can. China can be lonely, you might need some support. Welcome to the site....seriously, you can do this....but to do this you need to quit drinking. Never again, ok?

Dee74

welcome back MissPerfumado

D

soberlife123

hiya

GhostFace

Good morning everyone.

Day 45 here. To the ones in doubt about sobriety, things do get better with time health and finacially.

To the ones that slipped, don't beat yourself up, see it as a temporary defeat rather than a failure. I took me many attempts to finally get it right. Now I believe I'm in maintanace mode working on bettering myself to stay sober.

Don't let something drastic happen to finally quit like what happened to me. Seek support and you will be surprised as to how many people are willing to help. Don't wait for tomorrow or the new years it's all an illusion, all we have is now so start right were you are with what you have.

Jenses

Morning all. Day 8! Yesterday was the first day I had the urge to drink - but instead I took time to reflect. Discovered that I had inadvertently walked into my own trigger (or bear trap lol).
I have a habit of pushing myself hard to get stuff done. Yesterday that resulted in 6 batches of Christmas cookies in 4 hours! Then because I have gone all out (and gone "numb" in process) I want to reward myself and shut down (or perhaps continue the numbness?)

Not sure why I do it, but I recognize that this approach to life doesn't work for me. I was reading about the Buddha's middle way last night and see that I need to find the middle way too. Something between 100km/hr and full stop.

Thanks for listening

ubntubnt

Jenses can you send some of those cookies my way please?
Its great that you are identifying trigger behaviours, just keep sober and keep learning

Jenses

Hey ubntubnt - will send some over with a courtesy insulin shot lol. I believe that I am currently suffering from sugar hangover!

If I am honest with myself, that trigger behaviour has been an ongoing problem since my teens. It has been a gift when there has been a critical deadline, but I can't live in that space. Now the challenge of figuring out what life looks like cruising at 65km (instead of bouncing between 100 and 0).

I think another cookie could only help

SleepyDots

Welcome to all the new members!

Pixie - I remember you from last November's group, I was part of that class as well.

Today starts Day 7 for me, and I am feeling great. We got our Christmas tree up and decorated yesterday so it's finally feeling more like the holiday season here. My AV has been really quiet, I'm grateful for that but definitely not letting down my guard!

Neverthought

Ditto........

On to day (13).....

Have a nice day!

MissPerfumado

Thanks everyone.

ubntubnt, I am thinking to start AA after Christmas which I'm spending in Melbourne. My doctor wants to see me again before I leave next week. She says AA would be the next logical step if I fail to stay clean right through the holiday period. But I think I should make it a long term part of my recovery. You're right about expat life in this part of the world - it is not healthy in the long term.

Anyway, time for bed now. I feel sleepy enough that I hope the dreaded insomnia (which was my worst bugbear the last time) does not keep me up tonight. A 6 am start this morning has me completely knackered now.

leasha24

Happy to say I've made it 2 weeks
It's been challenging at times but overall the way I feel right now is pretty amazing.

MyShadow

Day 4, taking it one at a time.