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Class of November 2015 Part 6

Old 12-13-2015, 08:08 AM
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Originally Posted by Keepnitreal View Post

After looking back all all of our posts over the last month it's just amazing to see how much alcohol has consumed our lives. When we were drinking we thought about how we would get more without driving, how we could order our next drink right away because we were already running low, how soon we could get home from a family obligation so we could drink.....constant thoughts of getting more. Alcohol consumed our lives.
Today each of us are so much stronger. We still have some cravings, depression, anxiety, self doubt, but overall alcohol isn't consuming our thoughts. We are all finding freedom! We deserve freedom!
Damn it's nice to wake up everyday without a hangover! 35 days without one! (Sore muscles don't count). That's freedom! Happy Sunday my wonderful classmates!
So true! I have much more free time now. I am not sick/lethargic all the time, and I don't spend so much time worrying/planning everything around drinking!
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Old 12-13-2015, 08:10 AM
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Originally Posted by Supertired View Post

Had the vividest drunk and hangover dream last night. Felt so real. Super unpleaant. The brains capacity to make physical , the subconscious, is incredible. Was more then a little relieved to wake up to a hangover free me.
Oh those dreams are awful! I had one a few weeks ago and I woke up shaking and in panic just like when I was drinking! So weird!
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Old 12-13-2015, 08:34 AM
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Welcome back Dallow.

I know that planning well. I didn't want to reach out. I didn't want to hear anyone tell me I could get through it. I was just listening to the obsession in my head. I wouldn't have listened even if I did pick up the phone.

I wanted to drink, damn it!

Patricia - yes, so much free time. It goes by much quicker now though.

Congrats, Sobermarathon! Feels awesome. Well, I guess it feels normal in a way. I didn't realise how awful I felt for so long. I like the new normal.

Nice to see you, keepingitreal.
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Old 12-13-2015, 08:40 AM
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Originally Posted by pams View Post
I just reread my post about the holidays and my sucky family etc. It sounded pretty depressing. It's really not that bad. Every year I go through a nostalgic/grieving process during the holidays and my post on SR was part of it. My husband and I started our own traditions after my Mom passed away, so I have plenty to look forward to during the holidays. Thank you so much for the hugs and suggestions...it did help get me through my process.

I am coming up on 30 days. That's pretty exciting and my brain doesn't really know how to comprehend that. It's kind of hard to believe that I am actually doing this!

So it's time to get on top of another issue hanging over my head...this whole school thing. I have 6 weeks to finish a course that has been hanging over my head forever. I sat down, made my plan yesterday and maybe I just need to apply the skills I have been using for the last almost 30 days....just do it. Don't overthink it, just do it. And maybe I can start undoing the self-defeating cycle with my course, the same way I am undoing my self-defeating cycle with drinking? Just put one foot in front of the other and keep going.....

I am certainly going to try.
Catching up on the thread after a tiring work week dealing
with challenging business partners.

Pams, your sentiment here applies to everything we are doing.

It is simply AWESOME. Just AWESOME!
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Old 12-13-2015, 09:26 AM
  # 245 (permalink)  
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Good morning, Class!

Dallow, I'm glad you came right back here. I've been there too. I've had the exact same thought of "well, I'm not going to reach out on SR because I've already made my mind up to drink anyway." That is my AV! Unfortunately I had to go through that many times before I finally realized that I never wanted to drink, it was always my AV in disguise.

Was able to have a nice phone conversation with a friend this morning. If I was drinking, I never would have wanted to talk to anyone at 8am on the weekend. So grateful that wasn't me today!
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Old 12-13-2015, 10:23 AM
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Dunno what's up with me, thinking, well they slipped and came back, so can I then!!! Even though they saying how awful it was..... arghhhhhh....I had like 14 easy days where I didn't want to drink at all.

But now I'm in bits. .. I just want beer.... I am telling you all to stop myself. ... there is no reason, I'm not sad or hungry , I just want it like a toddler wants a biscuit.... must hang on.... 1 hour and 39 minutes till the shop shuts.... do not leave the house....

Pull yourself together enfin.... get a grip.
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Old 12-13-2015, 10:25 AM
  # 247 (permalink)  
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Hi everyone! It's Sunday, December 13, 2015!

>>>>*****NOTE*****<<<<
This will be the last time I post the class list. Many people are no longer checking in & there have been some slips so I don't know how many days some people have. I will continue to log in to give & receive support. Everyone is doing awesome!!! Never give up & let this disease kill you! That's what it wants! Love you guys!!! :-)

*Canguy -35 days
*HealthyGoals - 7 days
*Me (KiKi) -28 days
*Patricia -working her butt off! :-)
*StrangeAngel-working her butt off too!!! :-)
*Pams -28 days
*GoldenSands -29 days
*CurlyGirl -38 days
*KeepNitreal -35 days
*BlackBirdFly -29 days
*Noolan -24 days
*SwimKim - 19 days
*MeShelly -29 days
*Thumbelina -44 days
*WalkTheLine-23 days
*Supertired -18 days
*Max74 -43 days
*DariaM -7 days
*ForeverFuzzy -24 days
*Jemma44 -35 days
*Blondsober -21 days
*Snowvelvet -39 days
*GoldCoastGirl -22 days
*Badger257 -29 days
*Odelle -22 days
*Tufty13 -42 days
*TryinginTexas - 29 days
*Onetimeless -37 days
*Chicklet -6 days
*Dallow - days
*Learntofly -50 days
*Faithfulandfree - 15 days
*Tootsiesdad -35 days
*SoberMarathon -21 days
*Introspectator- 28 days
*RedAndy -29 days
*Rah555 -20 days
*Alphonse -26 days
*amitranjan04 -19 days
*ultradad -7 days
*got2stopnow -21 days
*Fabat50 -36 days
*Enfinthechange -16 days
*SilentCinemaFan -16 days
*VanillaChaiTea -16 days
*Deniselarkin -16 days
*Augusta1893 -16 days
*Determined82 -16 Days
*Mish - ? days
*Missy7 -16 days
*Paul37 -15 days
*Tatersalad -16 days
*IronPhoenix -? days
*Dustmeoff -23 days
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Old 12-13-2015, 11:00 AM
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Originally Posted by enfinthechange View Post
Dunno what's up with me, thinking, well they slipped and came back, so can I then!!!
That's your AV talking. I slipped in the past because of these same thoughts.

How are you going to help the ones that slipped if you drink too?

How drinking is going to help you?

Stay strong
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Old 12-13-2015, 11:19 AM
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Originally Posted by enfinthechange View Post
Dunno what's up with me, thinking, well they slipped and came back, so can I then!!!.
Yup....I had those thoughts go through my head too......
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Old 12-13-2015, 11:34 AM
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Tufty, Jemma.....sympathies to you and your families. Loss is hard.
Dallow, glad you're still here.

Kiki, thanks for the list to date. Have wondered how many people in the group.

I am. Hanging in. 5 weeks today, weekend went easier than previously this time. Go and kick off the new week......all the best everybody, talk later
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Old 12-13-2015, 11:44 AM
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Originally Posted by pams View Post

Yup....I had those thoughts go through my head too......
Dam right, I know it.... 16 minutes till shop shuts. This can't go downhill after 2 weeks and starting to feel better. .. n˛˛˛ooooooo˛o I can't let it.. but to battle all the time will be hard. Must be mental strong. Be as stubborn as I usually am!!!
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Old 12-13-2015, 12:11 PM
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Hi Enfin, hope you're doing ok and managed to get thro to closing time ok, know exactly how you're feeling but as others say the feelings / cravings / urges no matter how strong definitely come and go - I've had a couple of torrid times over the last couple of weeks where they've been absolutely overwhelming and not for short periods either but have managed to ride them out - you can definitely do it too and after 14 days will feel so much better to have weathered the first storm.

Tufty sorry to hear about your daughters partner - that's no age at all.
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Old 12-13-2015, 12:13 PM
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Originally Posted by enfinthechange View Post
Dunno what's up with me, thinking, well they slipped and came back, so can I then!!! Even though they saying how awful it was..... arghhhhhh....I had like 14 easy days where I didn't want to drink at all.

But now I'm in bits. .. I just want beer.... I am telling you all to stop myself. ... there is no reason, I'm not sad or hungry , I just want it like a toddler wants a biscuit.... must hang on.... 1 hour and 39 minutes till the shop shuts.... do not leave the house....

Pull yourself together enfin.... get a grip.
You got it Enfin!
You don't want to let yourself down with a slip. You've done awesome this far. You've fought the hard dark days when your hubby was hurting so bad he wouldn't talk to you. A drink wouldn't be worth it! You've got this!!!

KIR
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Old 12-13-2015, 12:17 PM
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[QUOTE=KiKi0615;5687690]Hi everyone! It's Sunday, December 13, 2015!

>>>>*****NOTE*****<<<<
This will be the last time I post the class list. Many people are no longer checking in & there have been some slips so I don't know how many days some people have. I will continue to log in to give & receive support. Everyone is doing awesome!!! Never give up & let this disease kill you! That's what it wants! Love you guys!!! :-)

Kiki-
Thank you so much for taking the time to do this the whole time! It was great!
How is Kenny? How are you? 2 more days till the big 30!

KIR
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Old 12-13-2015, 12:30 PM
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Oooh. Day 36 and AV has reappeared. Not heard from him in a while. I was watching the documentary about Amy Winehouse ( poor girl). Every scene had alcohol in it.. drinking parties.. cocktails... I started to feel a real craving despite the fact that the film is about someone who drank herself to death. Turned the film off and made myself a hot chocolate but am having definite cravings for a glass of wine.. or 6.
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Old 12-13-2015, 12:34 PM
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[QUOTE=KiKi0615;5687690]Hi everyone! It's Sunday, December 13, 2015!

>>>>*****NOTE*****<<<<
This will be the last time I post the class list. Many people are no longer checking in & there have been some slips so I don't know how many days some people have. I will continue to log in to give & receive support. Everyone is doing awesome!!! Never give up & let this disease kill you! That's what it wants! Love you guys!!! :-)

Kiki-
Thank you so much for taking the time to do this the whole time! It was great!
How is Kenny? How are you? 2 more days till the big 30!

KIR

You're welcome!!! It helped me too!!! Yes! 30 days on Tuesday! I am celebrating by going to lunch with my AA sponsor and then to a meeting to get my 1 month coin. :-) mail feeling so much better!
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Old 12-13-2015, 12:44 PM
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Hey all you guys who's AVs are screaming in your ear....don't listen. Think ALL THE WAY THROUGH THE DRINK!

Will it really be worth it??? After 30 minutes or so you won't even feel good. You will start to feel all the guilt, shame, remorse, depression & anxiety again. There will be consequences; there always are! You will "wake your disease back up" so the next time you quit it will be even harder & the cravings will be stronger! You may not get another chance!!! There are only 3 ways out of this:
1. Stay sober
2. Drink until you eventually die a slow hellish death
3. Jail or psych ward

I dunno...doesn't sound fun to me! Just because other people slip up & drink doesn't mean I am going to. No one EVER comes back after a slip/relapse and says "gee! That was fun!" Everyone always comes back & says they regret it!

Come on! Don't let the AV tell you that drinking is a good idea! It lies!!! You can do this! You can save your life!!! AND be happy!
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Old 12-13-2015, 12:47 PM
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Hope you got through closing time. I remember white knuckling it some evenings in my last attempts, resisting the urge to bolt out the door.

Thanks so much for the class list, Kiki. It really helped me keep accountable to you all here. I will still post days.

Ps - I also have my month chip, but it's my 24 hour one I keep snug in my bra. Just for today, eh?
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Old 12-13-2015, 12:55 PM
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Originally Posted by snowvelvet View Post
Hope you got through closing time. I remember white knuckling it some evenings in my last attempts, resisting the urge to bolt out the door. Thanks so much for the class list, Kiki. It really helped me keep accountable to you all here. I will still post days. Ps - I also have my month chip, but it's my 24 hour one I keep snug in my bra. Just for today, eh?
Haha! Good place to keep your chip! I'm gonna continue to post my days too! :-)
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Old 12-13-2015, 01:26 PM
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Race Run!

Finished the half marathon! And turned down the free beer at the end. No speed records set - I was something like 6000 out of 8000 - but it was my first one so I'll take that!
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