Class of December 2012 - Part 14
Thats great youyr son is near courage. Congrats Stevie that's fantastic. I failed. Crept back in last year and got worse and worse. Starting back again. Nothing bad happened just general obsession and physical and mental deterioration.
Day 4. Feeling positive and determined. Trying not to feel stupid and ashamed.
Day 4. Feeling positive and determined. Trying not to feel stupid and ashamed.
Hey all, just my seasonal swing by, hope everyone is hanging in there and enjoying summer. Been crazy hot here, non stop wildfires all over the province so the smoke has been near non stop, almost fog like some days. Not much going on, working, taking the nephews to the beach, still debating moving or doing some renos on the house (been posting that for 3 years now). Other than that things are alright, a few ups and downs with the bi-polar, nothing that a couple med tweaks can't handle, and I'm pretty good at spotting if I'm going to the high side or the low side now.
Weird when you think we are coming up on half a decades here.
Will try and swing by more, if I forget then will talk in the fall.
Weird when you think we are coming up on half a decades here.
Will try and swing by more, if I forget then will talk in the fall.
Hi Gonzo
It's always a pleasure to see a post from you or another of our class. I stay subscribed to this thread and am on SR daily. Gratitude and Don't Quit keep me regular.
Like you, I'm pretty much the same as the last year or so. I'm more productive at work all the time. I enjoy my family and other people now, which I never really did before -- everything always used to be all mixed up with anxiety and addiction, even the good bits. Still experience some mood swings , but just in the low direction -- I never got full-on manic, and now the furthest I get towards that end of the spectrum is to chatter annoyingly
I'm glad you posted.
It's always a pleasure to see a post from you or another of our class. I stay subscribed to this thread and am on SR daily. Gratitude and Don't Quit keep me regular.
Like you, I'm pretty much the same as the last year or so. I'm more productive at work all the time. I enjoy my family and other people now, which I never really did before -- everything always used to be all mixed up with anxiety and addiction, even the good bits. Still experience some mood swings , but just in the low direction -- I never got full-on manic, and now the furthest I get towards that end of the spectrum is to chatter annoyingly
I'm glad you posted.
Hi All, just thought I'd pop in and say Hi, been an "interesting" 3 years. Finally got the message in March this year that I couldn't stay stopped without working a program so got myself back to AA, this time in the right frame of mind which was one of complete surrender. Picked up my 5 month chip on Tuesday last week, starting to appreciate what a manageable life looks like and as a result see how completely unmanageable life had become. It's wonderful seeing the positive ripples of my recovery spreading out to affect others instead of the reverse. Friends and family are starting to migrate back - AV told me that I just had a dysfunctional family who didn't call or visit and being let down by friends was how things worked. Now realising that family didn't want to be here and I had the wrong kind of friends.
Coming back on here in March and seeing my join date of December 2012 was a shock. 4 and a half years of struggling with this on my own - crazy. I've many times had Courage's "so - what are you going to do different this time" (thanks) comment in my head. Having been drinking for so long and right through formative years, the addictive voice was 80% of my public personality - going to AA and actually getting involved would have meant demolishing the 80% and trying to function on the immature, untested 20% while removing the coping crutch and at the same time have the 20% have to rationalise the fact that the 80% had been outright lying to me for years, plus cope with the years of guilt and shame blowback. Getting involved with a program was too big but just the right size for AV to use to keep me off the wagon.
Therefore there needed to be a correspondingly big enough rock bottom to put the "sh1t you'll have to face in recovery" vs "dangers of not recovering" into perspective which thankfully didn't result in my loosing too much and I've pretty much dealt with the wreckage from that now. Although ironically the biggest fallout has come from my having to move on from certain people in my life that weren't helping that didn't appreciate being told as much.
This group was where it all started and much as I get the waves of "oh cr8p - did I really do that..." I'm also grateful for the moments of thankfulness I get for people who helped guide the way to the path I'm now on - so thank you Class of December 2012.
Coming back on here in March and seeing my join date of December 2012 was a shock. 4 and a half years of struggling with this on my own - crazy. I've many times had Courage's "so - what are you going to do different this time" (thanks) comment in my head. Having been drinking for so long and right through formative years, the addictive voice was 80% of my public personality - going to AA and actually getting involved would have meant demolishing the 80% and trying to function on the immature, untested 20% while removing the coping crutch and at the same time have the 20% have to rationalise the fact that the 80% had been outright lying to me for years, plus cope with the years of guilt and shame blowback. Getting involved with a program was too big but just the right size for AV to use to keep me off the wagon.
Therefore there needed to be a correspondingly big enough rock bottom to put the "sh1t you'll have to face in recovery" vs "dangers of not recovering" into perspective which thankfully didn't result in my loosing too much and I've pretty much dealt with the wreckage from that now. Although ironically the biggest fallout has come from my having to move on from certain people in my life that weren't helping that didn't appreciate being told as much.
This group was where it all started and much as I get the waves of "oh cr8p - did I really do that..." I'm also grateful for the moments of thankfulness I get for people who helped guide the way to the path I'm now on - so thank you Class of December 2012.
Hullo Napster!!
I'm so glad to see you alive & well -- we never really know that about a fellow-alcoholic who picks up the drink again. So perhaps you weren't so well for the last few years, what matters is your now and your future.
Be careful with yourself and know that you can do this! It's not easy, and I know everyone says so, but it's worth it. With only 3 years under my belt, the difference for me is dark to bright. It's like I can see again.
Hugs & welcome back !
I'm so glad to see you alive & well -- we never really know that about a fellow-alcoholic who picks up the drink again. So perhaps you weren't so well for the last few years, what matters is your now and your future.
Be careful with yourself and know that you can do this! It's not easy, and I know everyone says so, but it's worth it. With only 3 years under my belt, the difference for me is dark to bright. It's like I can see again.
Hugs & welcome back !
Hi everyone,
I thought I'd check in with you all seeing as we spent so much time together over the last 4.5 years up until last year.
Congrats on your 3 years plus courage
Great news on 5 months Napster, it's good to hear from you.
I'm back on SR after picking up last year. As we all know it gets worse and worse. Although nothing specifically bad happened it was becoming physically every day and mentally obsessing over it every day. Only on day 7 but feels different this time.
In life generally new Mr RAL and I got married last month. Jr RaL is nearly 8 and back at school. We are off to Cuba on a late honeymoon in October so very much looking forward to that and to being and staying sober.
Hope everyone is doing well
I thought I'd check in with you all seeing as we spent so much time together over the last 4.5 years up until last year.
Congrats on your 3 years plus courage
Great news on 5 months Napster, it's good to hear from you.
I'm back on SR after picking up last year. As we all know it gets worse and worse. Although nothing specifically bad happened it was becoming physically every day and mentally obsessing over it every day. Only on day 7 but feels different this time.
In life generally new Mr RAL and I got married last month. Jr RaL is nearly 8 and back at school. We are off to Cuba on a late honeymoon in October so very much looking forward to that and to being and staying sober.
Hope everyone is doing well
I'm sorry you've struggled to stay sober this past year, Ready. It is hard and painful at first, but I know you can do it -- and it's worth it
I'm glad you & your husband and son are together on this!
I'm glad you & your husband and son are together on this!
Hi Courage, hi all.
Just dropped in to say hi. I love it when i see older threads still going and that you know whenever you chose to drop in, there is always support.
Good onya class Dec 12 xxx
Just dropped in to say hi. I love it when i see older threads still going and that you know whenever you chose to drop in, there is always support.
Good onya class Dec 12 xxx
Member
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 232
Hi there everyone, I have no idea when last I posted!! Lots of changes with my kids growing up, one is 19 and in university now and the other is not too far behind!! Still sober and so grateful for that, it has definitely helped being sober and especially as a single Mom in their teenage years and as the "taxi service" their busy lives require! I'm coming up to 5 years soon and it feels very normal 😀
Great to hear from you marria and many congrats on 5 years. Hope you are OK
courage napster and gonzo.
Hope tam is OK and not affected by the recent hurricane.
Day 26 for me. Had a rough week but still standing and sober.
I'm active in September class but my heart is here too 😀
courage napster and gonzo.
Hope tam is OK and not affected by the recent hurricane.
Day 26 for me. Had a rough week but still standing and sober.
I'm active in September class but my heart is here too 😀
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)