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Class of December 2015

Old 12-08-2015, 08:28 PM
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Another good night on a work trip. I am realizing that my old job really engaged me in drinking in excess. Normally my coworkers would be out drinking all night tonight, not this new job. We had an awesome dinner (dry aged pork chop, sweet potato puree, brussel sprout hash & a spring salad) & while they had 2 drinks a piece I had water. I am slowly feeling better and i know actually eating is helping a lot. Before when I tried to quit I would just not eat or eat something bland just to fill space. I know eating is filling me up & not leaving me with this empty "I want a drink" feeling.

I am physically still really bloated and having some stomach pains so I trying to get into my doctor to make sure its not anything more than just my body adjusting.
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Old 12-08-2015, 09:23 PM
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Originally Posted by Camryn474 View Post

I had a lot of cravings today but I thought my way through them. Drinking never lives up to the fantasy I have in my head. Thinking in terms of reality as opposed to what I THINK I can achieve by drinking is helping me. Seems obvious but clearly not for me as I thought drinking again would be worth throwing away six months sober.
Hi Camryn, I was thinking about this too yesterday. I was walking home from work and I was reflecting no how long more I will live in China before moving most likely elsewhere in Asia (I have lived in China for a few years).

Anyway, my AV gatecrashed the thought and got me thinking about how much I miss really good quality steak and how will I possibly be able to enjoy it sober without some red wine to wash it down (my ultimate meal in my old drinking state world). Not much you see, nothing nasty, just a couple of lovely glasses of a nice bordeaux or Malbec.

But it never played the tape forward as usual. Never painted the full picture. So let me complete the picture. Finish that bottle. Open a cheaper one and put on a DVD. Finish that one before the end of the movie. Put on coat, stagger out to nearest 7-11 and buy more. Either open a third one or move to beers to try to slow down. Pass out on the couch with the equivalent of three bottles of wine in my stomach. Steak long forgotten. Wake up at 3am. Stagger into bed and pester my wife. Get told if I don't stop I am back on couch. Go to sleep. Wake up for work with raging hangover, dizzy and anxious. Check my emails to make sure I didn't email anything drunkenly blunt to anyone at work (20% chance I did). Jump into the shower in a panic then off to work without any breakfast. Feel like crap all day. Probably skip lunch. After work, stop off in pub for a few beers to feel better. 50% chance stay there all night and 45% chance I leave after 4 and buy a bottle of wine on the way home. 5% chance I come to my senses and just have a couple and go home.

Thats the reality of what a steak and a glass of wine is to me.
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Old 12-08-2015, 09:38 PM
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Originally Posted by Delta088 View Post
Finally ready...just made it to 24 hrs...I'm hoping I can kick alcohol once and for all.
Hi Delta, sorry to hear about your teammate. I know you have not written out a full plan of how to quit etc but after a 30 year drinking history I can share a couple of things to get you started:
- Lots of people do quit first time and lots do it without AA. So anything is possible. You will have to find what works for you
- Almost everyone tries to quit and fails over and over again unless they have a well thought through plan. We all hugely underestimate the enemy and it usually kicks us a few times until we show it the respect to deserves
- Your emotions and body will likely jump all over the place but there is only one truth worth remembering....as long as you don't drink you will continue to move forward. Just a single drink and you most likely hit the reset button...this is because NO alcoholic can drink in moderation. Your addictive voice will try to tell you that you can. Trust me, you can't.

good luck.....try to check in with us and let us know how we can help. Its easier if you don't have to do it alone.
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Old 12-08-2015, 09:55 PM
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Hey December team!

I hope that you can forgive me. I'm buzzed right now, but committed to having day 1 be tomorrow... No matter what negative stuff I'm feeling. Will you have me in this class?

This is the right time to quit. I've been drinking for too long and have had impacts to my friends and family relations. Wishing each and every one of you a good evening.

Besides not drinking anymore (check) does anyone have any tips for making tomorrow a better day???

-FF
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Old 12-08-2015, 10:42 PM
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hi FacingFuture, welcome to the class!
How about putting down the bottle, drink some water and get some sleep. Wake up tomorrow with your drinking history behind you. I think you will find that will make tomorrow a stupendous day. Come back tomorrow and talk to us a little and you can figure out the rest. Till then, have a good night.
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Old 12-09-2015, 12:25 AM
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Day 4 today, feel a bit more like myself. Still not sleeping the best, all sweaty and hot all night.....its December and I slept with no cover for most of the night. Still got a bit of a headache but other than that starting to feel ok.

For the first time in probably a year I read a book last night, I only managed about 50 pages as it seemed to wear my brain out really quickly but I'd honestly forgot how nice it can be to get lost for an hour in a story. I like fantasy so it great transporting to a whole other world for a little while, totally different from all your trial and issues in the real world.

Going to hit the gym tonight and try to start shifting my beer gut.

Ubnt - I know what you mean about the painfully blunt e mails when drinking, all my diplomacy goes out the window, at the time I think i sound self assured and in control of the situation and when I read it back I actually sound like a dick who everyone is thinking probably had a few to many when he sent that.
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Old 12-09-2015, 12:37 AM
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Day three here.

Sleep is broken and weird. I'm not working today and woke up feeling sad and stressed about the things I've done and let slip from drinking. Especially work and financial stuff. I feel a sense of dread in facing up to my responsibilities as I can't remember the last time I did it sober. Even paying a bill - I'd drink to reward myself and also to forget how much money I'd just paid out!

Anyway, I'm grateful to be sober but just feeling a little flat this morning.

X
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Old 12-09-2015, 12:57 AM
  # 448 (permalink)  
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FacingFuture - this is a great link to help start you off:

https://store.samhsa.gov/shin/conten...0/SMA-3720.pdf

and this is another great link:
https://store.samhsa.gov/shin/conten...SMA12-4474.pdf
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Old 12-09-2015, 04:45 AM
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Three days down. Still nauseated and bloated but did some reading and apparently that's normal so I know this too shall pass. On to day 4!
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Old 12-09-2015, 05:05 AM
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Originally Posted by ubntubnt View Post
Hi Camryn, I was thinking about this too yesterday. I was walking home from work and I was reflecting no how long more I will live in China before moving most likely elsewhere in Asia (I have lived in China for a few years).

Anyway, my AV gatecrashed the thought and got me thinking about how much I miss really good quality steak and how will I possibly be able to enjoy it sober without some red wine to wash it down (my ultimate meal in my old drinking state world). Not much you see, nothing nasty, just a couple of lovely glasses of a nice bordeaux or Malbec.

But it never played the tape forward as usual. Never painted the full picture. So let me complete the picture. Finish that bottle. Open a cheaper one and put on a DVD. Finish that one before the end of the movie. Put on coat, stagger out to nearest 7-11 and buy more. Either open a third one or move to beers to try to slow down. Pass out on the couch with the equivalent of three bottles of wine in my stomach. Steak long forgotten. Wake up at 3am. Stagger into bed and pester my wife. Get told if I don't stop I am back on couch. Go to sleep. Wake up for work with raging hangover, dizzy and anxious. Check my emails to make sure I didn't email anything drunkenly blunt to anyone at work (20% chance I did). Jump into the shower in a panic then off to work without any breakfast. Feel like crap all day. Probably skip lunch. After work, stop off in pub for a few beers to feel better. 50% chance stay there all night and 45% chance I leave after 4 and buy a bottle of wine on the way home. 5% chance I come to my senses and just have a couple and go home.

Thats the reality of what a steak and a glass of wine is to me.
Wow this really resonated with me bc that's exactly what I think. Oh I'll have one glass of wine with dinner to enhance my entree. And then if spirals just as you say. Thanks for the visual of how playing it forward is so important
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Old 12-09-2015, 05:07 AM
  # 451 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Yogini1603 View Post
Day three here.

Sleep is broken and weird. I'm not working today and woke up feeling sad and stressed about the things I've done and let slip from drinking. Especially work and financial stuff. I feel a sense of dread in facing up to my responsibilities as I can't remember the last time I did it sober. Even paying a bill - I'd drink to reward myself and also to forget how much money I'd just paid out!

Anyway, I'm grateful to be sober but just feeling a little flat this morning.

X
Oof my finances are the same way, it's going to take a long time to get them back in order, but that's part of being an adult and accepting that we can't change the past and also a reminder of what life was like as a drunk. I remember thinking I don't have a care in the world bc I'm drunk and I don't care about finances. It's all catching up to me now.
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Old 12-09-2015, 05:30 AM
  # 452 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by uniqueusername View Post
Neverthought... whats a guy gotta do to make the list. joke.

CuteNGayYay...congrats on a week!!! hair flip...

abraxas...a guy I work with quit drinking 9 years ago. He tells me he traded in alcohol addiction for his X box addiction.

ubntubnt...Yeah I have been eating alot too. Seems to help a little. I am sure that is a temporary solution, but it works for now.

Ghostface...I cant imagine quitting smoking too!!! wow brave guy!!! I hope you kick those cancer sticks! mabey in a few months for me.
I sure as hell, thought that you were on the list. I did say the first group post, give me hell, if I missed you.

Thanks for bringing that to my attention! You get to ride shotgun!

Wherever you are in the world, have a great day!

To a great group of people supporting each other and appreciating what life is all about:


Uniqueusername
FacingFuture
Beautifulpines
Rio97
JoeM
Carebearlost
Jenses
Nightswimming50
Delta088
Soberwolf - Thank you for stopping in each day and providing inspiration.
Earlyriser
Atxjoshua
Rivelino
Selfrespect
Leasha24
Daniel123
Yogini1603
Delilah1
CuteNGayYay
Camryn474
Ali123
GhostFace
McCartney
Highwind
SleepyDots
Soberjim
Applekat
Ubntubnt
Tans
Abraxas69
RedAndy
Jbmetzger
Nmd
Krisinwi
JJ9
Grendhar
Melki
MeHere
Snowbunting
ChickChick
Thomas59
SoberRunner
Worried75
Kirky
Sean30
Jsbodhi
julesonya
Ladybug2
DreamBig42
Forabetterlife
Jackie1214

....last but not least Dee

And thank you to all those that stop in periodically to provide inspiration as well.
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Old 12-09-2015, 05:51 AM
  # 453 (permalink)  
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Missed a few days. Not much going on .
Done with griping , for a while. Just looking to stay sober. Day 8 or 9. Something. Not a numbers person I don't think. I'm looking for 1 more sober. All there is right now.
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Old 12-09-2015, 06:09 AM
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Day (8) here and settling in.

Work is good, family is good and I'm good.

I have a few bills that I have to deal with. I needed a new roof on my shed. That's done and cost about $1400....and I had trouble with a tooth back in October, so, I had to get that pulled ( (back of mouth so not noticeable). But I'm getting an implant, so, that's another $2000. Unfortunately, our dental plan only covers dental maintenance.

So, covering those costs kinda sucks.....

Otherwise, as the world turns......
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Old 12-09-2015, 06:46 AM
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Originally Posted by julesonya View Post
Wow this really resonated with me bc that's exactly what I think. Oh I'll have one glass of wine with dinner to enhance my entree. And then if spirals just as you say. Thanks for the visual of how playing it forward is so important
That also hit home for me. It's the first glass I always see. But the end is always the same.
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Old 12-09-2015, 08:00 AM
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Day 9!

I am so happy to say it's been 9 days since I had my last drink. I don't think I've gone that long without having at least one drink in over 6 years. It's been difficult at times because I often go to visit my parents in the evening and my dad and mom will usually have a scotch or martini before bed and I used to always indulge there but instead I've just been getting a glass of water to drink. I can't believe how amazing I feel. Feels so good to not wake up hungover. Today is my day off of work so I made a plan of things to keep me busy so I don't think about drinking. However I have a work Christmas party tonight where I know everyone is going to have a couple drinks. I'm a little worried about going but I think I'll be fine. I'm planning on just telling them I'm just gonna have water since I have the disney world dopey challenge coming up in just 4 weeks (run a 5k 10k 1/2marathon and full marathon in 4 consecutive days). Anyhow hope everyone else is doing good also. It's so nice to come on here and read everyone's posts. Such a nice support system.
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Old 12-09-2015, 08:08 AM
  # 457 (permalink)  
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To those who are struggling I ask that you find strength .

To those who have 24 hours of sobriety I ask that you feel stronger than yesterday and that the next 24 hours bring you continued strength and peace from the torment of alcoholic living . I ask that you are able to continue with each 24 hours of sobriety for the rest of your life .

Peace
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Old 12-09-2015, 08:31 AM
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Originally Posted by leasha24 View Post
I am so happy to say it's been 9 days since I had my last drink. I don't think I've gone that long without having at least one drink in over 6 years. It's been difficult at times because I often go to visit my parents in the evening and my dad and mom will usually have a scotch or martini before bed and I used to always indulge there but instead I've just been getting a glass of water to drink. I can't believe how amazing I feel. Feels so good to not wake up hungover. Today is my day off of work so I made a plan of things to keep me busy so I don't think about drinking. However I have a work Christmas party tonight where I know everyone is going to have a couple drinks. I'm a little worried about going but I think I'll be fine. I'm planning on just telling them I'm just gonna have water since I have the disney world dopey challenge coming up in just 4 weeks (run a 5k 10k 1/2marathon and full marathon in 4 consecutive days). Anyhow hope everyone else is doing good also. It's so nice to come on here and read everyone's posts. Such a nice support system.
Super....regarding the (9) days. Glad you're appreciating that amazing feeling.....stick with it.

You mention about your parents having a drink before bed. I cannot imagine what that is like. If I did that it, it would be like doing a line or drinking a few cups of coffee. I'd be bouncing and then I would drink for hours.

My system is so tolerant, that one drink, sadly enough, wouldn't do a thing. I think that's were I get all convoluted and think well, I just fell off of the wagon and didn't get anything from it. And then I spiral downward.

Keep us posted on the upcoming marathon!
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Old 12-09-2015, 09:37 AM
  # 459 (permalink)  
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Good morning everyone. Thanks for the great advice last night Ubntu and Dee. Dee, those documents are really helpful. I especially like the second.

And Thomas, thanks for the well wishes. That means a lot.

I like the talk on here about thinking the first one through. I usually have this romantic idea in my head about how drinking will make me feel. The sad part is it almost never feels that "good." I need to remember to think through that first vision and see where it would take me. One drink would lead to probably 12+ drinks, I'd go to bed with my wife angry, sweat profusely all night, wake up anxious and counting down the minutes until I could start the cycle all over.

I love the advice and positivity here. I'm all in for a good day 1 today!
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Old 12-09-2015, 09:43 AM
  # 460 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by leasha24 View Post
I am so happy to say it's been 9 days since I had my last drink. I don't think I've gone that long without having at least one drink in over 6 years. It's been difficult at times because I often go to visit my parents in the evening and my dad and mom will usually have a scotch or martini before bed and I used to always indulge there but instead I've just been getting a glass of water to drink. I can't believe how amazing I feel. Feels so good to not wake up hungover. Today is my day off of work so I made a plan of things to keep me busy so I don't think about drinking. However I have a work Christmas party tonight where I know everyone is going to have a couple drinks. I'm a little worried about going but I think I'll be fine. I'm planning on just telling them I'm just gonna have water since I have the disney world dopey challenge coming up in just 4 weeks (run a 5k 10k 1/2marathon and full marathon in 4 consecutive days). Anyhow hope everyone else is doing good also. It's so nice to come on here and read everyone's posts. Such a nice support system.
Great job! It's smart that you are planning ahead. I also have an event this evening which involves alcohol - I will take your approach and plan to splurge and get a root beer (one of my favs)!
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