bblackbirdflyy

Fuzzy think that word means different things across the world. It's a derogatory term in america. I'm sure that wasn't your intended context though. Lol

bblackbirdflyy

It is a victory that you were able to stop drinking before it got bad strangeangel. Don't let it lure you into a false sense of security.... What about the next time?

Healthygoals

Good morning class!

At work with a clear head on day 12! This weekend is going to be easy, as of now I have NO desire to drink.

Waving hi to everyone, need to get back to work!

bblackbirdflyy

Ha ha kiki, the thread had gone quiet from your posts yesterday and at the end of the night I thought oh no! We can't lose kiki, who will update the list!

Perhaps you can do a roll call to see who is still around?

patricia68

Good morning.

I had a good night of sleep. Sober nights are so much better than drunk nights!

I am dreading the weekend though...we plan on going Christmas shopping with my husband and I am worried that we might end up having another fight. I'm walking on eggshells when he's around. I just don't know what to do with all his negativity. Maybe I am too sensitive, to insecure...I don't know how to deal with him anymore. Being stuck in the house all day, living in a small town, I find it difficult to distract myself from all the negativity at home...

Right now I am having a hard time getting dressed to start the day. I just want to go back to bed and sleep until this feeling of hoplessness is over...but I have to keep going for my son.

He just came to my room and asked me for a hug and a kiss for no reason. That's what keeps me going...

ultradad

Celebrating Thanksgiving today and feeling great! Nice to wake up sober!

blondsober

We're exactly in the same place - and my AV is already saying:

"Well, you can still have wine next time you are camping, or after skiing, or during the company retreat . . . etc."

The AV just plants these seeds. I am just saying "shut up" in advance to it!

Glorious Day 6 here!

Keepnitreal

Hi Patricia- I hope this goes better then planned. Are you seeing a counselor to help you sort this out? Maybe you can make a deal with hubby before you go, that if he starts to degrade you or you feel he is you just say a safe word and he stops. Let him know you want all of you to be happy and placing blame on each other isn't going to fix that. You both have a child to love and protect.
Are you in a positions where you could say "I feel that's very hurtful so I'm going to go inside this store while you're in that one? Some way to take a 5 minute break, but not lose yourself in the process?
It's just a thought so take it for what it's worth.
I was so angry at my husband (he was angry too because of the ugly things I had said to him while I was drunk) the first week I stopped drinking that I stayed in another bedroom and really loved it. It's funny how after a few weeks we are in a much better place. He has seen me changing and is getting kinder all the time.
Big hugs from KIR

KiKi0615

HELP! Huge craving!!!

Can someone remind my AV why I don't want to drink today???

Ugh.

blondsober

You'll feel so much better soon! And we need you here KiKs!

bblackbirdflyy

Play the tape kiki, what will happen if you drink?

KiKi0615

These cravings come out of NO WHERE sometimes. It's like a demon enters my body & says "Boo!!! I'm STILL here!!! Bahahahahaha!!! Come on KiKi!!! What are you doing??? You know how nice it would be to have a few drinks & cigarettes! Think about how relaxxxxxed you would feel? You made it through Thanksgiving with your dysfunctional family members, it's Friday, it's nice outside, you have time be hungover tomorrow...!"

REALLY??? Are you F-ing kidding me AV?

All I was doing was making soup! I was not hungry, angry, lonely or tired. I am not stressed or angry....

Shut up AV!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dallow

Kiki, just push through 30 minutes. Surely you can do that!

After 30 minutes if you still feel like drinking. Write here again.

I'll give you the same advice.

Push through minute by minute and just tell yourself that "I'm not gonna buy alcohol/pick up that drink right now".

The cravings will pass. You will feel proud of yourself.

Keepnitreal

StrangeAngel- glad you're still with us. I hope son you're able to just stop with any wine. I've been in that place where I got angry at my partner because I wasn't ready to quit partying.
Last night I said something to my hubby that has me scared so I think I will share it with all of you. He was saying how nice it was having me sober and he thought I was actually more fun (I don't see that because I was a s***load of fun....until I got mean as a snake with him) anyway, he asked how I felt. I told him I felt really good, but further in the conversation I told him, you know this doesn't mean I'm never going to drink again. He looked at me with a questioning look, and I said "I'm not perfect I may stumble one day or chose to go out and celebrate with my GF's. In essence I set myself up for a fall. I know that I can't drink again, but that I wanted to prepare him just in case has my worried. Do I just want him not to be totally disappointed if I screw up or am I setting up a future party date? :-(

KiKi0615

Thanks Dallow!!! Just the act of typing out my post about my craving diminished my craving by about 80% and I just told the remaining 20% to F off! I'm outside with my dog & kids getting fresh air & craving is gone. Phew! Got thru that one but I'm sure that's not the last of them today. Grrr....

I. AM. FIGHTING.

SwimKim12

Kiki, hang in there! You've got this! When your AV gives you an excuse to drink, follow up the "No" with what would happen. Like AV is telling you to drink because you've got a free afternoon, tell it no and explain why, i.e. if I have that one glass of wine, I will want to drink the whole bottle and then I will pass out and wake up hungover at 8pm and not be able to sleep and feel so guilty and let down, etc. Let those feelings wash over you. It will help shut the AV up.

Keep checking in here!

Keepnitreal

Hang in there KiKi!!!

KiKi0615

Hmmmm...if I drank the craving cycle would start all over, I would not have fun, I would spend $ I don't want to spend, I would risk a DUI driving home from the bar (because when I drink I always end up in bars), I would hate myself, I would feel like crap tomorrow, I would lie to my husband & kids again, I would lose faith in myself, I would let all you guys down, I would be extremely depressed tomorrow and the anxiety attacks would go way up again and on and on and on......

Ok...craving 100'% GONE!

KiKi0615

Oh gosh! I forgot about the whole passing out before 8:00 pm and being hungover tonight! That's THE WORST!!! Thanks for that reminder SwimKim! Ugh! No way, no how am I drinking today!

SoberMarathon

tell the AV to back off!!

Don't even think about it. Moderation doesn't work for alcoholics. It's why we are here and keep ending up back here after fooling ourselves we can handle it!

Stay strong, craving will pass!!