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Class of November 2015 Part 4

Old 11-29-2015, 05:56 AM
  # 261 (permalink)  
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Enfin, I feel for you. I also worried that how I acted when I was drunk was the real me. I did research on the internet regarding how alcohol affects the brain. After the research I realized that sober me is the real me. I shared the research with my husband too since I figured he had the same concerns. Have you considered individual and marriage counseling? Please do not give up...push for a better life for yourself and your family. Life is better sober. That is still an option for you. This difficult time with your husband will pass, but it will likely take open and honest communication about what happened and about the role alcohol plays in your life. We are here for you. Sending hugs
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Old 11-29-2015, 06:10 AM
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As I read people's posts I see that we are working through many things- guilt, remorse, self-hatred, confusion. We need to come to terms with our past, need to do some soul searching to understand why we turn to alcohol, need to develop skills to overcome hurdles that come our way. This site is a great place for support and learning. I went to individual counseling some time ago. It was really helping. My counselor had me fill in a spreadsheet - what do I get from drinking; what do I lose by drinking. This was a visual way for me start understanding the impact of alcohol on my life. It showed I lost more than I gained and got me thinking about why I turn to alcohol. The paths that brought us here are quite different - for me, family background, low self esteem, gastric bypass (stopped compulsive eating), unexpected loss of my 24 year old step daughter in October 2010 in our home due to accidental drug combination, kids growing up and moving out of the house, taking on a new job, moving to a new state away from my kids and granddaughter - so many changes, so many emotions. This path has taught me compassion and understanding. I try not to be judgmental anymore and I try to look deeper into situations and people. I have lost friends and have found that most relationships are superficial. It does hurt but in the other hand it is better because I see people's true colors. We are good people who have stepped off the path a bit, trying to get back on. The best thing is, we can! All is not lost! Together we can overcome this bump in the road.
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Old 11-29-2015, 06:43 AM
  # 263 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Determined82 View Post
Hey I hope it's ok for me to join also! I'm Emily and I have a problem with Cocaine. I am officially on Day 2 of recovery from this awful drug and intend to abstain for the rest of my life! i need as much support and encouragement as possible and in return I'll give as much as I can to others. Together we can do this
Welcome Emily! So glad you are with us!!! :-)
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Old 11-29-2015, 06:46 AM
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Enfin, regardless of what happened, of what other people think, of what becomes of your marriage; in the eyes of your children you are beautiful. As Rah555 posted, we are all dealing with past regrets but must learn to move forward, to learn from our mistakes and to build the foundation for a new life. Please be good to yourself today and allow your true destination to reveal itself. Look at this class as a whole and individually, our past is not what we chose willingly, just a wrong turn in the road. We are all working hard to get back on course and take back control of our lives that we so unwittingly relinquished to the guise of addiction. Time heals all wounds Enfin, physical and emotional. Sending you a big cyber hug!
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Old 11-29-2015, 06:51 AM
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Originally Posted by Odelle View Post
JL2014 I'm sorry you had a bad day, they happen. Tomorrow is a new day, a chance for a new start. You may feel trapped right now, but one day you will realize that you hold the key to free yourself. Drink some water and try and get some rest. I have more than my fair share of day 1s, but I'm not giving up and neither will you!
I agree with Odelle ^^^ and welcome! So glad you are here! We will help you!
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Old 11-29-2015, 06:52 AM
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Originally Posted by Chicklet View Post
got room for one more? 5 days sober here and counting!
Hey Chicklet! Cute name! Of course we have room for one more! New class list coming out in a few minutes. You can do this! :-)
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Old 11-29-2015, 06:53 AM
  # 267 (permalink)  
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Good morning everyone.

To those who are struggling: I can't add anything to the suggestions and support you have gotten from those with much longer sober time than me but please know I've read your posts and am praying for your physical and emotional healing.

Day 14, the second weekend I've maintained sobriety and have been in several situations surrounded by alcohol. Some "OFF SWITCH" was flicked on in my body and I hope it stays in that position.

Congrats to those staying sober.

Off to spend some quality time with my daughter and plan a nice Sunday dinner.
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Old 11-29-2015, 06:59 AM
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Originally Posted by enfinthechange View Post
Second morning... despair is still hanging around like a bad smell. .. I somehow can't feel anything yet also lurch from wanting to laughter to wanting to cry to wanting to die. My husband still won't talk to me. I am free falling, yet carrying on as normal with the kids. I read posts here and burst into tears. I don't know if I can succeed in not drinking, but I know everything depends on it, and you guys are my best bet.... We done everyone on every tiny victory, every time u don't pick up its like a snowball. . The strength just gets bigger! I need you all today very much as i think I would do something stupid else.... thank you all x
I'm here for you enfin! Hang on...we will get thru this together. Sunday's are hard for me so we can help eachother. Send me a PM if you need to...

1 hour at a time. Try to take a few small walks today, a nap, eat, drink lots of water, post here & do something nice for yourself.

You got this!!!
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Old 11-29-2015, 06:59 AM
  # 269 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Mish View Post
Hi guys..I've been following this thread but thought I'd better join the group officially.
Welcome MISH!!! So glad you joined!!! :-)
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Old 11-29-2015, 07:02 AM
  # 270 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by snowvelvet View Post
Welcome new classmates and hugs to all, old and new! Day 25... The more days I get the weirder it seems. I actually find it quite frightening. Have a great day all.
Me too! Being sober feels like I'm walking around naked. Ha. Still better than drunk. 25 days!!! Woo hoo!
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Old 11-29-2015, 07:03 AM
  # 271 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Augusta1893 View Post
I felt like I should wait for the December class since it is almost the end of the month, but will go ahead and join the November if that is ok. I got through my first 24 hours. The real struggle will be when I go back to work on Monday and the after work routine. I like my wine to unwind after the day. The problem is I don't just have one glass! I joined SR for the support and accountability.
Hi Augusta! Your story is my story. The after work wine. I am only 14 days in but the first work week was brutal for me. I changed up my after work routine and that helped a lot.
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Old 11-29-2015, 07:05 AM
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A big welcome to all of our newest classmates! I'm starting day 8, which is a record for me in 2015. Just a week ago, I was logging in here and longing for 3 days. One day at a time is all it takes. For those of you who may not be aware of another newbie thread, logging in each and every morning on the 24 hour thread is also a big help to me and others by committing to 24 hours of sobriety. We need to use every tool available to us.

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...part-90-a.html
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Old 11-29-2015, 07:12 AM
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One of the things we need to work on is changing our focus from the negative to the positive. Today I am grateful for a Sunday morning free from a hangover; my hubby; our 3 pups; my daughters and granddaughter; our apartment; my job. Recently some good things have happened...received sweet texts from my daughter thanking me for being there for her; received a bonus at work; my hubby and I are about 5 months from being debt free. Good things exist...just need to look for them, acknowledge them, and hold onto them!
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Old 11-29-2015, 07:15 AM
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Originally Posted by enfinthechange View Post
What if the terrible thing was the real me?? Maybe I shouldn't blame the alcohol??? Maybe It just opened the door I wanted stuck shut....
No way! It wasn't you...it was the alcohol!!! Alcohol is evil. Once you have some sobriety under your belt and start to change from the inside out...everyone will see that it was the alcohol.

Have you ever considered working the 12 steps? I'm gonna work them with my sponsor soon & I've heard the really help clear away the wreckage of the past! Hang in there and remember to breathe! Xo
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Old 11-29-2015, 07:18 AM
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Originally Posted by Missy7 View Post
Back on day two here. I wish I understood this cycle--or should I say I wish I had learned to stop it. I've given up so much to this problem--and I've never been happy about the results. I will have one good day this holiday weeken, and a weeks worth of stuff to do! And having just come off a bender, I'm terribly anxious abt it. Everything is closing in on me! I'm going to lie back down and rest another hour, then I'll have to be responsible for whatever this day brings
Welcome Missy! It's a new day...a new start...
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Old 11-29-2015, 07:21 AM
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Jeez I take a night off and I have 4 pages of posts to ready this morning and a whole whack of new classmates! This class is awesome...and very chatty!

The morning of Day 14 here. Hoping to get some Christmas going on at my house today...inside and out. But first, it's off to our little office cleaning job and grocery shopping. I will check in later on. Happy Sunday!
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Old 11-29-2015, 07:22 AM
  # 277 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by enfinthechange View Post
I know dee, thanks for keeping on helping. .. I am.being needy I know. .. but I'm feeling a hit better and hopefully now! That's down to u guys... without this I may be dead.....
Be as needy as you want!!! I know it's not easy to ask for help so you must be very strong! We are all here for you!

I posted over 35 times on Friday to get through the day! Talk about NEEDY! Haha. But you know what? I got thru 4 massive cravings & stayed sober! I'm 2 weeks sober today! Each day gets better & a little easier.
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Old 11-29-2015, 07:26 AM
  # 278 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by rah555 View Post
As I read people's posts I see that we are working through many things- guilt, remorse, self-hatred, confusion. We need to come to terms with our past, need to do some soul searching to understand why we turn to alcohol, need to develop skills to overcome hurdles that come our way. This site is a great place for support and learning. I went to individual counseling some time ago. It was really helping. My counselor had me fill in a spreadsheet - what do I get from drinking; what do I lose by drinking. This was a visual way for me start understanding the impact of alcohol on my life. It showed I lost more than I gained and got me thinking about why I turn to alcohol. The paths that brought us here are quite different - for me, family background, low self esteem, gastric bypass (stopped compulsive eating), unexpected loss of my 24 year old step daughter in October 2010 in our home due to accidental drug combination, kids growing up and moving out of the house, taking on a new job, moving to a new state away from my kids and granddaughter - so many changes, so many emotions. This path has taught me compassion and understanding. I try not to be judgmental anymore and I try to look deeper into situations and people. I have lost friends and have found that most relationships are superficial. It does hurt but in the other hand it is better because I see people's true colors. We are good people who have stepped off the path a bit, trying to get back on. The best thing is, we can! All is not lost! Together we can overcome this bump in the road.
Great post Rah! :-)
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Old 11-29-2015, 07:31 AM
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GOOD SUNDAY MORNING (11/28/15)!
Several new classmates!!! 12!!!

:-) Welcome SunnyDenver, Lily76 & VanillaChaiTea, JL2014, Augusta1893, emma99, Paul37, Determined82, Deniselarkin, Mish, Missy7 & Chicklet to the class! :-)

*****NOTE*****
Some people don't like to count days. If anyone wants me to take them off this list or just put something generic liked Jsbodhi has below, no problem!!! OH and send me a PRIVATE MESSAGE if I need to change anything. :-)

We are STRONGER TOGETHER!!!

Gifford -? days (we miss you! Check in!)
Canguy -21 days
HealthyGoals -14 days
Me (KiKi) -14 days
Patricia -? days
StrangeAngel -"working her butt off!" :-)
Pams -14 days
GoldenSands -15 days
CurlyGirl -24 days
KeepNitreal -21 days
BlackBirdFly -15 days
Noolan -10 days
SwimKim - 5 days
MeShelly -15 days
Thumbelina -30 days
Lisa247 -9 days (we miss you! Check in!)
WalkTheLine-9 days
Supertired -15 days
Jsbodhi - "in between 30 days somewhere" :-)
Max74 -29 days
DariaM -9 days
ForeverFuzzy -10 days
BadSneakers -20 days
Jemma44 -21 days
Blondsober -7 days
Snowvelvet -25 days
GoldCoastGirl -8 days
Rivelino -8 days
TheRake -8 days
Badger257 -15 days
Odelle -8 days
Tufty13 -28 days
TryinginTexas - 15 days
Onetimeless -23 days
Dallow - 7 days
Learntofly -36 days
Faithfulandfree - 1 day- NEVER give up! You can do it!
Tootsiesdad -21 days
SoberMarathon -7 days
Introspectator- 14 days
RedAndy -15 days
Jackie1214 -6 days
Neverthought - ? days
Rah555 -6 days
Alphonse -12 days
amitranjan04 -5 days
ultradad -9 days
SoulPower89 - ? days (we miss you! Check in!)
got2stopnow -7 days
Fabat50 -22 days
Enfinthechange -2 days
SilentCinemaFan -2 days
SunnyDenver -7 days
VanillaChaiTea -2 days-you WILL do this! You will stay sober & live a happy life! :-)
Lily76 -2 days- Stay strong! You're gonna make it! :-)
Deniselarkin -2 days-Your future is bright! You are strong! You can do this!
Emma99- 2 days-Welcome to the first day of the rest of your life!
Augusta1893 -2 days-you've got this!!!
Determined82 -2 days-Welcome! You got this!!!
JL2014 - ? days -Welcome! Never give up! You can do it!
Chicklet -5 days! Welcome!!!!!
Mish - ? days! Welcome! You can do it!!!
Missy7 -2 days- Welcome back!!! You can do it!

63 CLASSMATES!

*REMEMBER-all we REALLY have is TODAY...this 24 hours. It's not a race. There is no shame in starting over as long as we NEVER GIVE UP!!! There is no graduation; just a wonderful journey into the happiness and amazing life we all deserve...
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Old 11-29-2015, 07:32 AM
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Bad week for me. Drank 4/7 days. Not happy with myself. Thought I had it under control, as I always do, but don't remember coming home after drinks with a friend. Well, here we go again. Day 1. I'm so much better when I'm at work, but I had this whole week off from work and of course I got bored, so I drank. Need to find a better plan this week. Welcome to all you new folks, we have a great class. Please have faith in me and remind me that I can do this, bc I am losing faith in myself.
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