SoberLeigh

Goodnight, Conquest. I'm heading off soon, too.

phoebe64

Congrats to you on 8 months, Briar! Wowza! That seems to have gone by fast from my side of it. I am proud of you for doing treatment and taking the time needed for you, with all the demands on your time with motherhood and work. Also an inspiration to me.

phoebe64

Lost track of time playing with my beads. Have not done that in ages. Will regret it tomorrow...

venuscat

Well phoebe love, you are an inspiration to me.
And I would love to see some more of your bead work...I loved the bracelets you showed me last year. Last year? Yep. Wow.

Briar

Thanks guys, I couldn't do this alone, I'm grateful for all of you. Tonight I was talking to my friend who helped me (I'm just going to start calling him T to distinguish him from other friends since I reference him often here), and I was able to articulate that the anniversaries feel kind of empty to me because they suggest that I've put distance between myself and the addiction, but I feel like that's an illusion. It's still right here. It doesn't have to travel eight months to catch up with me, it can have me in an hour if I'm not careful. I still don't feel safe, and frankly I'm not sure it's safe for me to feel safe. I'm afraid of complacency. Afraid of what will happen if I let myself believe that thing is eight months behind me when it's always right at my back. T pointed out that I'm stronger and wiser than I was before, and I know better ways to protect myself. I know he's right, but I just have this fear. I'm not sure it will ever go away, and I'm not sure I want it to.

I told him it's like one of those ghost stories where someone leaves a haunted house to escape a ghost, only to find that it wasn't the house that was haunted, it was him, and the ghost will follow him wherever he goes.

Arbor I'm sorry it's a rough night. Been there! It feels like torture sometimes when you're exhausted and they just won't quit. Just one more way parenting makes you tough as nails...and completely insane!

Phoebe I love beads. I used to do beading when I was much younger, like high school. I made big, elaborate bracelets from seed beads. Not sure I have the dexterity or the eyesight to do it anymore. Or, okay, probably not the patience either.

phoebe64

Briar, if fear makes you very afraid to drink again, maybe it's not such a bad thing? However, living as if a monster is chasing you and breathing down your neck is not exactly a peaceful existence. Hopefully time makes it give way to peace. My longest sober stretch was fear motivated, as was my greatest weight loss. I should tap back into it, perhaps.

Beads. I do not do intricate things with seed beads, but, I do love them! So many pretty colts and finishes and tons of shapes these days. I sometimes get a multi mix and just string the combo of textures on wire wraps or to cover the wire for a pendant, use them as spacers. Tried a pattern and it is half done, lol. My hands are clumsy for it and the instructions were not very good. I need to try to finish it. I like handmade glass beads and making bracelets with them as focal beads with spacers and metals. Same for necklaces. I have some bangles that are Alex and Ani knock offs, and whipped up charm bangles for daughter to gift to her friends last Christmas. Earrings are always fast and fun. But, not advanced with my skills. I just enjoy the textures and colors, etc... Buying beads is like picking candy, right?

phoebe64

About to shower. Early for me! Dog gets dropped off for his neuter surgery between 8-8:30. Poor baby. Then, I am tasked with having stay mellow for 10-14 days!?! But, I have today free! Husband working from home for at least the morning, to get son on the bus, since I may not get home in time. Really, son should be able to do that, but he is terribly distracted. I fear he will forget the time and will be curled up on the couch with a comic as the bus flies by.

Maybe hubby and I could go out for lunch. Doubtful, because he never takes time for that, but maybe. And, well, I should stick to my eating plan. I could get a good salad somewhere...

I should make use of the time to do something without the interference of puppy shenanigans today, though.

BrighterDayz

Good morning all and congratulations on the milestones!

Arbor

Baby boy not sick thank goodness. Yet to have a cold, actually. He's just a fussy baby. Since he's a breast fed baby he likes to be close to momma. Laying him down to sleep in his own crib is hit or miss.

My wife likes to bead too Phoebe. Not much time anymore, but boy does she have quite the collection.

Have a great day everyone. Missing Mark...

Briar

I'm glad the little one is okay Arbor. Mine was breastfed too, but we always kept her in a bassinet and then crib. She did well, though now at four she manages to weasel her way into our bed most nights. Right now it's 6am and I'm in bed with my coffee working on waking up, and she's snuggled up next to me. My husband complains that it's a bad habit, but she's our only one, and this won't last forever. No way she'll want to sleep with us when she's 14.

phoebe64

That is exactly right, Briar! Mine would not sleep if we brought them to bed. It was party time, lol. Now both have ADD, so that makes sense! With the companionship, they were too excited to sleep, especially the boy. He loved his bassinet and crib from day one!! But our daughter had trouble falling asleep on her own or being put down once asleep. It was like trying to set down a bomb, lol. Very slowly and carefully!

I can imagine your wife's collection, Arbor. It is too easy to go overboard with beads when a few beads are often rather inexpensive. The hand made ones are pricier, though, but nothing compared to what we all could spend on drinking, right? I also occasionally sell a few things. I have probably broken even.

Arbor

She used to do a lot of weddings Phoebe. Designing earrings, necklaces, and bracelets. Now she's into cuff links. Got a nice Etsy website going.

It's a catch 22 breastfeeding. You want that bond, but there comes a time when you want them to sleep on their own in their room and crib. It goes completely against the whole concept. We've read a lot of books about it. It's a very natural animalistic thing for the baby to want to be close to momma. Especially at night when sleeping. Europeans have no problem sleeping with their babies for the first year, but us Americans gotta get them in that crib ASAP. God forbid you tell anyone the baby is sleeping with you! It just takes time. I remember my first son in that for the first year we constantly were up once or twice a night to comfort him if he woke. We've never believed in the cry out method. He's been sleeping like a champ for over two years now and it couldn't have worked out any better.

SoberLeigh

Glad to hear that your little guy is okay, Arbor. Sounds as though your wife is passing on some great immunities; it's great that he hasn't even had a cold yet.

SoberLeigh

Have a great day, Octsobers.

Congratulations, again, to Briar and venuscat.

Mark1014

Hey gang. Dealing with some distraction around here but such is life.

Way to go on 8 months Briar. With my little one it was more my wife that was ready for her to quit climbing in bed with us. Time came and went and those days are over now. Something to be remembered.

You and your bride seem like a great team Arbor. That's a wonderful thing.

Hope the week is progressing nicely each of you.

SoberLeigh

Hi, Mark.

phoebe64

Hi Mark, hope all is okay!

I feel so free with the toddler, I mean puppy, out of the house today! He likes me to be around, so I don't go to the basement. So, I took advantage and after poking around with the beads, I whipped up a necklace and earring set today for myself. I bought the beads over a year ago, and never sat down to do anything with them. It was a groupon deal to a local bead store. I had to spend the whole coupon at once at a very, very overpriced store. So, I chose some beads that coordinated, but needed a bit more to pull them together. I found a few things and think it is pretty good. It looks a bit dark. The center bead and earrings have a pinkish tone, and all the beads are a "picasso" or sort of mottled bronzed finish to them.

Mark1014

That's really nice phoebe....makes my eyes burn to think about doing that kind of tiny work!

SoberLeigh

Wow, Phoebe, what a beautiful necklace. What talent you have!!!!!

Mark1014

Hi gang. I'm not home from work long and already getting dark. With the sound of the rain I'm getting sleepy and it's not long after six. Time change this weekend I think so I better get used to the long dark.

I like the avatar you've got there Arbor...gotta get used to seeing a new one for ya. Speaking of avatars, I've always wondered about yours Leigh. It looks like someone walking into light or maybe away from something.....any special meaning?