Class of October 2014 Part 20
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Join Date: Sep 2013
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Originally Posted by Arbor 
You guys are the best, thanks!! Made me feel a lot better. 
Thanks for this Mark. Hit the nail right on the head. Too much blame. It's not that I'm not drinking cause that's not what I'm looking for, bit can't help but feel like that's the core. Sucks cause even my wife pointed out my mood. I certainly don't want to bring people down, but that just the way it is sometimes. Hard to find the quick solution sometimes. Have a great Monday everyone.
Thanks for this Mark. Hit the nail right on the head. Too much blame. It's not that I'm not drinking cause that's not what I'm looking for, bit can't help but feel like that's the core. Sucks cause even my wife pointed out my mood. I certainly don't want to bring people down, but that just the way it is sometimes. Hard to find the quick solution sometimes. Have a great Monday everyone.
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Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 1,697
Aw, Venus! So sorry to hear you had to go in for a procedure. Keep resting and healing.
Actually, that goes for everyone! There seem to be more hurdles than usual around here. Keep clearing them, friends. They do pass eventually.
This weekend was fun and action-packed, but exhausting. We're celebrating a family birthday tonight, so I'm using that as a valid excuse to skip out a little early from work this afternoon. Hopefully, I can get some stuff done around the house then.
No dress yet, unfortunately. But we did make a stop at one of my favorite farmers markets and a Mexican bakery. The weather has been gorgeous, so it was definitely one of the best weekends I've had in a long time. Now, back to reality. Lol
Big healing hugs all around!
Actually, that goes for everyone! There seem to be more hurdles than usual around here. Keep clearing them, friends. They do pass eventually.
This weekend was fun and action-packed, but exhausting. We're celebrating a family birthday tonight, so I'm using that as a valid excuse to skip out a little early from work this afternoon. Hopefully, I can get some stuff done around the house then.
No dress yet, unfortunately. But we did make a stop at one of my favorite farmers markets and a Mexican bakery. The weather has been gorgeous, so it was definitely one of the best weekends I've had in a long time. Now, back to reality. Lol
Big healing hugs all around!
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Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 5,554
Sorry to hear you had a procedure, V, and sending you healing vibes. Just one thing after another for you. I hope this is the end of health issues for a long awhile. I did mention my wedding in there somewhere(thanks for asking). It was a typical wedding and very nice, at a church and afternoon at a country club, beautiful day. I also shared that I would have been up for the elopement or small destination wedding. My husband preferred the larger thing, as did my parents and his mother, lol. I am glad we had a bigger time with the people who were there. It was very fun! Went by too fast, really.
I ran across this on FB this morning, and it seems a fitting quote for our family here:
I ran across this on FB this morning, and it seems a fitting quote for our family here:
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Join Date: Oct 2014
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That sums it up pretty well phoebe!
Humiliating start to the day for me as someone must have accidentally taken my towel from the hook outside the showers. Had to go out there and dry off with my sweaty tank. My face is still red. Should only get better from here.
Humiliating start to the day for me as someone must have accidentally taken my towel from the hook outside the showers. Had to go out there and dry off with my sweaty tank. My face is still red. Should only get better from here.
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Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 5,554
Oops! Well, it was a locker room, right? But now you need another shower!
So, I just got a call from longtime friends. Husband's best friend from childhood, and godfather to our oldest. We rarely see them, and adore them. Last minute invite to help them celebrate their 25th wedding anniversary. They like to drink, but it is a work night and she said her hubby is crazy busy at work, which is why this last minute plan. She is trying to surprise him....with us! Very flattering.
We will go, but this is a bit stressful. I am annoyed with myself that I cannot just feel happy to go out to see these friends, and grateful that we are available to do so. Not only because I bet there will be great pressure to at least toast the occasion, but the menu is very decadent. I have already scoped that out, which is something I always do, to try to plan ahead for the food I have that day. I am working so hard at eating right, and exercising, and not really lost weight yet. But I do see changes in my body. Tummy looks more toned. Anyway, It will be a challenge but I do look forward to seeing them.
Just putting it out there. I will order a bottled fizzy water right off. I did mention to the friend I am "dieting." I was very out of breath because she called while I was doing my video, lol. It was natural to explain. So, I am well set up already to refrain from drinking and to eat as carefully as I can there. I am not sure I have ever spent a sober occasion with this couple. Maybe once. Well, when I was pregnant, for sure.
So, I just got a call from longtime friends. Husband's best friend from childhood, and godfather to our oldest. We rarely see them, and adore them. Last minute invite to help them celebrate their 25th wedding anniversary. They like to drink, but it is a work night and she said her hubby is crazy busy at work, which is why this last minute plan. She is trying to surprise him....with us! Very flattering.
We will go, but this is a bit stressful. I am annoyed with myself that I cannot just feel happy to go out to see these friends, and grateful that we are available to do so. Not only because I bet there will be great pressure to at least toast the occasion, but the menu is very decadent. I have already scoped that out, which is something I always do, to try to plan ahead for the food I have that day. I am working so hard at eating right, and exercising, and not really lost weight yet. But I do see changes in my body. Tummy looks more toned. Anyway, It will be a challenge but I do look forward to seeing them.
Just putting it out there. I will order a bottled fizzy water right off. I did mention to the friend I am "dieting." I was very out of breath because she called while I was doing my video, lol. It was natural to explain. So, I am well set up already to refrain from drinking and to eat as carefully as I can there. I am not sure I have ever spent a sober occasion with this couple. Maybe once. Well, when I was pregnant, for sure.
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Mark that sounds like a scene right out of Seinfeld! Lol! Sorry man!
Phoebe I sometimes fantasize about hanging out with old friends and what that would be like sober. Gotta say it does stress me out a bit. What's helps me now is knowing that those hang out times are over and in the past. Things have changed dramatically on my end and I'm sure on theirs too. Life goes on and I find most people to be very accommodating.
Phoebe I sometimes fantasize about hanging out with old friends and what that would be like sober. Gotta say it does stress me out a bit. What's helps me now is knowing that those hang out times are over and in the past. Things have changed dramatically on my end and I'm sure on theirs too. Life goes on and I find most people to be very accommodating.
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Join Date: Oct 2014
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That DOES sound like Seinfeld! Lol. Sheeeeesh. What a way to start the week, Mark! If anything, know that sharing your story spread smiles to many. Haha
And that quote is a new favorite, Phoebe. You've got a solid plan there. Keep the bubble water close at hand. Direct the conversation to your new routine, how much better you feel and look, etc. Good friends understand and generally drop it rather quickly, I've found.
My greatest pressure/badgering comes from myself. Weird, huh?
Home for a quick nap and then planning to tackle laundry and all of the produce from my farmers market visit... Fresh cream peas, okra, turnips... channeling my granny's southern cooking skills tonight. She'd be proud.
And that quote is a new favorite, Phoebe. You've got a solid plan there. Keep the bubble water close at hand. Direct the conversation to your new routine, how much better you feel and look, etc. Good friends understand and generally drop it rather quickly, I've found.
My greatest pressure/badgering comes from myself. Weird, huh?
Home for a quick nap and then planning to tackle laundry and all of the produce from my farmers market visit... Fresh cream peas, okra, turnips... channeling my granny's southern cooking skills tonight. She'd be proud.
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Join Date: Oct 2014
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That produce sounds great Conquest. I imagine I could relate quite well to your granny's cooking. We don't have fresh maple syrup here like the places I visited in Vermont, but I can remember going with one of my grandparents to where they were cooking sugar cane to make syrup. Smelled so good. I hope your afternoon is a nice one.
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LOL Mark, and I was really hoping for a different end to that story...I thought you were going to say you had to use a clipboard or something and dash to the office and ask for a towel. 
And yes, that is an awesome plan phoebe. Seriously. And of course you have us as a fallback if the night gets uncomfortable. And well done on the tummy getting more toned.
Glad you had a lovely weekend Conquest, and I'm sure the right dress will present itself.
It's all very exciting!
Arbor, are you still going to your weekly meeting? If you are, maybe it would be good to talk about how you are feeling with the group. I think you will find that moodiness is pretty common around this time in sobriety. And yes, it will pass, and tons of love headed your way.
A few things happening here...we are having the worst heatwave in the history of October, so not good. Plus I don't know if I still have my job, and my sister's father-in-law is living his last day or so. It's a lot to go through this again. My sis is doing it really tough...just too much this year.
Dee ~ I hope you are feeling better today.
Love to everyone. ♥
And yes, that is an awesome plan phoebe. Seriously. And of course you have us as a fallback if the night gets uncomfortable. And well done on the tummy getting more toned.
Glad you had a lovely weekend Conquest, and I'm sure the right dress will present itself.
It's all very exciting!Arbor, are you still going to your weekly meeting? If you are, maybe it would be good to talk about how you are feeling with the group. I think you will find that moodiness is pretty common around this time in sobriety. And yes, it will pass, and tons of love headed your way.
A few things happening here...we are having the worst heatwave in the history of October, so not good. Plus I don't know if I still have my job, and my sister's father-in-law is living his last day or so. It's a lot to go through this again. My sis is doing it really tough...just too much this year.
Dee ~ I hope you are feeling better today.
Love to everyone. ♥
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Join Date: Oct 2014
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Hi gang, today had me thinking about my own moods and their influence on my way of thinking about things. I'm finally getting around to reading an article I printed from SR about 'emotional memory management'. I've gotten into it just enough to see that it says I have it backwards. I should use the way I think about things to influence my moods. I like to think that would be possible. Getting sleepy now,but I intend to really dig into the article more maybe tomorrow. It's interesting stuff if nothing else.
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Hmmm...sounds like a google topic for me. Thanks, Mark!
Speaking of how our thoughts influence our moods... I met Jr.'s mother for the first time the other day. (It went just fine.) I was so very nervous, struggling with approval BS I guess. On the way there, a song came on the radio that said something like, "Your world's not falling apart. It's just coming together." That simple change of mindset instantly calmed my nerves. And instead of thinking of how nervous I was feeling at that moment, I thought of her. Sure enough, she was just as nervous as I was, sweaty palms and all. There wasn't exactly a kumbaya moment, but we made it through respectfully. If I hadn't have taken a second to look at the situation from another angle, I may have very well worried myself into panic... To the google machine I go before bed. Have a great night/morning everyone.
Speaking of how our thoughts influence our moods... I met Jr.'s mother for the first time the other day. (It went just fine.) I was so very nervous, struggling with approval BS I guess. On the way there, a song came on the radio that said something like, "Your world's not falling apart. It's just coming together." That simple change of mindset instantly calmed my nerves. And instead of thinking of how nervous I was feeling at that moment, I thought of her. Sure enough, she was just as nervous as I was, sweaty palms and all. There wasn't exactly a kumbaya moment, but we made it through respectfully. If I hadn't have taken a second to look at the situation from another angle, I may have very well worried myself into panic... To the google machine I go before bed. Have a great night/morning everyone.
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Glad that went well, Conquest! I can imagine it being stressful.
Hope you continue to mend, V. Your health comes first. Sorry about the job and family worries.
BD must be having a busy week.
Quit chilly here this am. Getting son off to school and then walking the dog. Have chores and such to do. The fancy dinner is at 7. I have a bit of a headache. Hope to get that gone. Unusual for the morning for me. Might be allergies.
Hope you continue to mend, V. Your health comes first. Sorry about the job and family worries.
BD must be having a busy week.
Quit chilly here this am. Getting son off to school and then walking the dog. Have chores and such to do. The fancy dinner is at 7. I have a bit of a headache. Hope to get that gone. Unusual for the morning for me. Might be allergies.
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Join Date: Oct 2014
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Thought that was last night phoebe. Enjoy!
Thinking of positive things is a great bedtime habit you've got there Arbor. I've got to work on that. Over the next year I have many personal inventory things to consider and close to the top of the list is my all-too-often gloomy outlook. I'm very entrenched in some ways of thinking that need changing. I find it very very difficult to train my mind. I can follow physical plans etc., but have been woefully unsuccessful at addressing my cynical outlook. Not good. Takes one's joy. Coming up with a plan to be proactive about it is also difficult for me. I've pretty much just always reacted to my thoughts and feelings even though I see that they often keep me trapped just like my AV did. So I stopped drinking. Now what? Anyway, I'm gonna start by reading that article and then researching from there. I've got to convince myself that I can ultimately determine the direction of my thoughts and the results of them.
Wishing each of you the best day.
Thinking of positive things is a great bedtime habit you've got there Arbor. I've got to work on that. Over the next year I have many personal inventory things to consider and close to the top of the list is my all-too-often gloomy outlook. I'm very entrenched in some ways of thinking that need changing. I find it very very difficult to train my mind. I can follow physical plans etc., but have been woefully unsuccessful at addressing my cynical outlook. Not good. Takes one's joy. Coming up with a plan to be proactive about it is also difficult for me. I've pretty much just always reacted to my thoughts and feelings even though I see that they often keep me trapped just like my AV did. So I stopped drinking. Now what? Anyway, I'm gonna start by reading that article and then researching from there. I've got to convince myself that I can ultimately determine the direction of my thoughts and the results of them.
Wishing each of you the best day.
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Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: New England
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Awesome Mark. I've got no doubt your determination will overcome.
Part of my negativity was mostly fueled by the drink. It's already cleared itself up a lot, but I still hear from my wife time to time that I need to look at things more positively. I respond saying, "Well I'm just being realistic." She keeps me in line.
Part of my negativity was mostly fueled by the drink. It's already cleared itself up a lot, but I still hear from my wife time to time that I need to look at things more positively. I respond saying, "Well I'm just being realistic." She keeps me in line.
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Join Date: Jan 2011
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Phoebe nailed it, busy here. Conquest, you will know it's the right dress when you see it. I am liking your plans very much and I hope you stay grounded.
Feel better Venus and Dee! Phoebe, I like to scope the menu first when possible-it takes me forever to decide, LOL. Arbor, life has gone in a different direction for you now that your family is the center. Mark, I never, ever, shower at the gym, now I know why! Briar, can you repost your chili recipe? I made the world's easiest french onion soup this weekend.
6 cups thinly sliced yellow onion
1/4 c. olive oil
1 bay leaf
1/2 teaspoon thyme
1 teaspoon crushed rosemary
1 teaspoon thyme
2 cloves garlic crushed
1 cup very finely sliced celery
1 tablespoon minced fresh parsley (or 1 tsp. dry)
salt and pepper
3 quarts vegetable broth (or beef broth)--you can add white wine -- beer, vermouth, brandy, or liquid of choice.
1 thin slices toast or croutons
1 thin slices swiss cheese
Garnish: Sliced green onions or
additional finely minced parsley
The night before you'd like to have your soup, place all ingredients except broth, toast, cheese, and garnish in a 4.5
quart crock pot on "low". Stir the onions to mix seasoning and oil. Leave onions to caramelize overnight--the next morning,
you'll find that they've reduced significantly in volume, and that they're nicely caramelized.
Add broth, and simmer for several more hours on "low". When the broth is heated, adjust seasoning with salt and pepper,
ladle into bowls, top with toast slices or croutons, and Swiss cheese. Broil for a minute or so, to melt cheese.
After the overnight cook on low, the carmelized onions were amazing-took all the work out of that chore. I love soup, but this is the only one DH likes, so he is happy. We are having more in a few minutes, then family haircuts, my sister too. My hairdresser comes to me. Gotta love that.
Feel better Venus and Dee! Phoebe, I like to scope the menu first when possible-it takes me forever to decide, LOL. Arbor, life has gone in a different direction for you now that your family is the center. Mark, I never, ever, shower at the gym, now I know why! Briar, can you repost your chili recipe? I made the world's easiest french onion soup this weekend.
6 cups thinly sliced yellow onion
1/4 c. olive oil
1 bay leaf
1/2 teaspoon thyme
1 teaspoon crushed rosemary
1 teaspoon thyme
2 cloves garlic crushed
1 cup very finely sliced celery
1 tablespoon minced fresh parsley (or 1 tsp. dry)
salt and pepper
3 quarts vegetable broth (or beef broth)--you can add white wine -- beer, vermouth, brandy, or liquid of choice.
1 thin slices toast or croutons
1 thin slices swiss cheese
Garnish: Sliced green onions or
additional finely minced parsley
The night before you'd like to have your soup, place all ingredients except broth, toast, cheese, and garnish in a 4.5
quart crock pot on "low". Stir the onions to mix seasoning and oil. Leave onions to caramelize overnight--the next morning,
you'll find that they've reduced significantly in volume, and that they're nicely caramelized.
Add broth, and simmer for several more hours on "low". When the broth is heated, adjust seasoning with salt and pepper,
ladle into bowls, top with toast slices or croutons, and Swiss cheese. Broil for a minute or so, to melt cheese.
After the overnight cook on low, the carmelized onions were amazing-took all the work out of that chore. I love soup, but this is the only one DH likes, so he is happy. We are having more in a few minutes, then family haircuts, my sister too. My hairdresser comes to me. Gotta love that.
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