Class of September 2015 Part 3
 

last part here:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...rt-2-a-20.html

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A 5 day holiday would be SO SO hard for me. But if you were drinking, how many of those days would you spend feeling hungover and worthless? If I was drinking and it was a 5 day holiday, I'd say 3 days would be spent binge drinking, hungover, or both at the same time. Then I'd go back to work feeling like sh!t. Ugh. So with every day passing you get to wake up and ENJOY your time. :) I get bored so easily if I dont have stuff planned. Do you have a movie you can go see alone while your wifey is out with the kid? Or sometimes a long walk reminds me of how beautiful life is and how grateful I am to be strong enough to be sober. 5 days is a lot of walks though and I would be restless. Get on Google and find some fun stuff to do in your city! Or get a new book! I hope you can figure some stuff out to keep you entertained. And tell wife to involve you in her plans!
Let me know what you come up with :)
Thinking bout ya!!!

Morning all. Good to see some folks putting some week milestones up.

Good to see you Arbor.

Busy day today for me. That's a good thing. Plus I'm starting to feel a little more normal.

One more day until the workweek can distract us!

Hi everyone, Day 6 for me today. Feeling pretty good overall. I have a big day of stuff planned just like yesterday. I have a cool yoga workshop from 3:00 to 5:00 and the rest of the time today will be spent catching up on work, paperwork and shopping. There's always something to do around this place. Zenchaser, I have a huge list of house projects that I want to get to as well. I love working on stuff around the house! Just went for a walk with my dog and there was a nice crispness in the air like fall is coming. I love this time of year. This is the perfect time to shed old habits. I hope it's a great Sunday for all!

One cool thing I learned a while back that always stuck with me.

Boredom is an emotion.

Think about it.

Matilda, I too get to thinking about all the time I have wasted by drinking, all the time I have just been going through the motions but feeling just totally checked out from life. Actually, it would be more accurate to say that I deliberately checked myself out. It is depressing for sure but I try to remember that saying “The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now." Time to step back into my life and be who I am supposed to be.

I like that, sleepy dots. I'm a gardener so it really resonates with me. I think part of this was triggered by an email I got. I was nominated for an honor by someone and the funding agency is asking about a gap in my publication record. It is there, in part, because my drinking was at its worst.. I feel so regretful about that and embarrassed too on behalf of the person that named me.

I really wish I didn't pick at things or myself the way I do--that I treated myself like I do friends or students, with compassion and understanding. Ten people can tell me something is great and one person can say, nah, I don't like it, and I always focus in the latter. I've been like that since I was a kid.

Day one again for me. I'm dealing with the shame and regret that comes along with relapsing. This time last year I had one of the worst nights of my life. And I could've repeated it this weekend, I was so close. I will claim today as my last day 1.

Happy sunday
 

Good morning everyone. Lovely cool Sunday morning...although it's supposed to get to the mid 80's...will be nice. Hike this morning. More of a power hike....2 miles up, then easy walk back down. Views of the city. It's a popular place so I love observing the people.

There's so much talk about boredom...not just in this thread. And I understand completely. I don't have the answers because there is always something to do. Yet I still feel.....empty maybe? Lonely? I think the key word is I'm feeling. Each moment. I'm not drunk, hungover, thinking about drinking, regretting drinking, ashamed about yesterday or fearful of tomorrow. All that mental gyration takes up a lot of space and time. My mind is free so to speak. Since I'm used to dwelling on or worrying about something, I worry about, well, nothing. Gosh there's nothing to worry about so I'm going to worry about not worrying. My mind is bouncing around looking for something to chew on and when it can't find anything it gets restless and discontent. It is a matter of staying busy, making lists, knowing the times I'm most restless and doing something. But ultimately accepting that this is normal life. Just settle in and relax. Took me years to foul my thinking up, it's going to take a while to straighten it out. I don't know.

Drinking will only kick me back to go....

Good for you Faithful in declaring another Day 1. :) Most of us have had more than one Day 1. Dust yourself off and examine the triggers that led to your relapse. Perhaps there was more than one? Stay close to SR Faithful, reading and posting often. My relapse occurred when I became complacent and stopped checking in with SR. The SR folks reinforce my desire to stay alcohol free.

I know what you mean Mathilda. I think I was raised to believe that if someone didn't like me, or I didn't always succeed, that there was something wrong with me. My mom would tell me that I am 'different' and I had to hide who I was. Crazy. And I took any kind of rejection or criticism very poorly. I'm getting better but still have low self esteem. My daughter is almost 15 and what a tough time socially. I tell her that not everyone is going to like you, in the same way you don't like everyone you meet. There's nothing wrong with you it just is. I have to remember my own words and give myself the same breaks.

It's amazing you're getting such recognition. Focus on that!

Good for you, ff. I'm sending you peaceful thoughts and support!

It's amazing I woke up without a hangover, first time in a very long time. Didn't sleep very well since I was sweating really bad all night. Ugh hopefully it's only for a few nights getting all the booze out of my system.
Start of day 2 gotta get moving to an AA meeting, then to pick up some eats so I can munch out while watching some football today.

I understand boredom very well, it's tough at first trying to fill all the hours wasted drinking, but as time rolls on new hobbies and activities fill those long hours.

Be well and stay sober class

Fricka, I was thought "weird" too. Bookish and awkward looking as a kid and painfully shy. My mom is a glass half empty sort of person too, which probably didn't help. For years I traveled around the world giving talks and her constant remark was, that's great, but when are you getting married? When are you having children? I'm married now (no children, not able to) and now, every time I talk to her, she is asking me if I've finished my current book. Argh! I know I'm not a child and I should let it go, but boy, she knows my soft spots and how to press them. I told my partner I'd like to forego the requisite trip back home for the holidays and maybe just go somewhere fun, either just the 2 of us or with the dogs.

Hi everyone, Hope you're having a great time with what's left of the weekend. Sorry I'm just dipping in; been rushed off my feet with work all weekend and have just had a chance to log-on to quickly say I'm on day 7. A week..squeee! So far I'm not missing alcohol one iota.

I've just bought some alcohol-free wine (not low alcohol, it's 0.00%) I know this is controversial but I fancied trying it. I also have some ZEO raspberry sparkling water and some guava energy drinks.

Checking in, sober, not on top of the world but sober...

Hi,

I was just wondering if I could join this thread?

I'm trying - yet again - to quit drinking. I can't believe I'm back in this place again. The biggest difference is my little boy is old enough now to notice and be affected by my drinking and it's really upsetting him (I'm a horrible 'mother' when I'm drunk :guilty: ). I'm parenting by myself with no support.

I started drinking heavily again at the start of the summer. I've gone from drinking a bottle of wine once or two evenings a week, to 1-2 most evenings now. I hate myself now. My poor little boy says he is scared when I drink because I'm angry and shout at him. I have to stop this. I can't put him through this any more :guilty:

Hi Cloel.

My kids are a big motivator for me too. Not the greatest dad when drinking. Don't do the things I've promised. Got to think of them when the cravings hit.

Had a really good lesson in church this morning about long term planning and how your daily actions often conform to those long term plans. Well mine is to be a good dad and be here for my kids, which includes surviving until I get to see my grandkids. If I keep drinking, that doesn't happen. So that's in my mind today.

Hope all are doing well.

Welcome to SR, Cloel! Sobriety really is a better way of life. Stick close to here. Ask for help when you need it. Help others when you can. And remember you don't have to take that first drink today no matter what. You can do this!

Day 136 for me thanks to these forums.

Welcome Cloel, I totally relate to the parenting problems. This past weekend I missed my sons very first football game due to being hungover. I'm drowning in guilt because of that. I know I am a great mom, and I know my intentions are always to do whats in his best interest. I think we also have to know that we aren't the same people with the same intentions once we drink.