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Class of September 2015 Part 3

Old 09-22-2015, 03:51 AM
  # 161 (permalink)  
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Jemma, do you feel like your boyfriend is supporting you enough in your recovery? Is it worth having a serious sit down chat with him and asking him to help you by not behaving like an immature adolescent for a little while?
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Old 09-22-2015, 04:24 AM
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I'd like another 24 hours please.
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Old 09-22-2015, 04:27 AM
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Hi everyone, Day 8 here. This is when I faltered last time - I'm a wiser person this week. It's not happening again. I have the benefit of one last horrible binge in my rear view mirror and it's a huge motivation not to do it again. I also know if cravings come up what to do and I have some tools ready. I'm excited that today is a normal work day/school day for the kids. Yesterday was a bit stressful having that full day appointment for my son. I'm excited about today. Yay!!! Welcome to the new folks - this group just keeps growing!
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Old 09-22-2015, 04:36 AM
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I watched rain in my heart yesterday. I've seen it a couple of time before but it's so raw and an honest documentary about where you can end up. I recognise myself in the future in the people in it and it's a good wake up call. I can feel their pain just watching it. Demons or no demons we just have to get through one day at a time!!
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Old 09-22-2015, 04:37 AM
  # 165 (permalink)  
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Yes, Secretdrinker, I did have that discussion with him. He says he is truly sorry and that he is making changes too. We shall see if that is true. I'm at the end of my rope with him though. It seems at times that HE is my problem, that I could be sober without him around. I manage to get several days sober often, and it is always something adolescent-like that he does, that sets me off on an angry drunk. But that could just be the AV talking.

Of course I know he has put up with a lot of s**t from me, so maybe I shouldn't be so hard on him. I just don't know...

What I do know is the next time I feel that anger at him surging, I will come here and vent and get some helpful advice from all you lovely folks
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Old 09-22-2015, 04:54 AM
  # 166 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Midton View Post
Day 17 now.

So I'm sober, eating well, working out, beginning to sleep better and am in day 4 of a 5 day holiday. And my reward is to be sick. I haven't had a day off work sick in at least 15 years. It's not so bad; I have a slight fever, a burning throat and general weakness.

It kind of reminds me of a time, long before I came to this site, when I tried to go sober. Eventually I had a problem and went to the doctor. He examined me and asked me questions, including about alcohol. I hadn't drunk in about 6 weeks and his diagnosis was just a bit of stress. And his cure was that I should drink every so often.
Midton, I hope you feel better soon!!!
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Old 09-22-2015, 05:13 AM
  # 167 (permalink)  
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Hi Fruity
So glad you're back. Good on you for going to detox. Try to really unplug and take this time for you. Don't cut out early, of anything. Stay the course. I know my mind gets so fouled up from booze that literally everything is a crisis. I can't sort out what isn't and what is stress. I try to really focus on only what I can control, not all the things I can't. You're dong the right thing, for you!
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Old 09-22-2015, 05:15 AM
  # 168 (permalink)  
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Hey Charlesworld. Good to see you here.

You can do this. Booze really is expensive...cutting that out will help your financial situation. I'm sorry the hub can't find work. I hope he's working with an agency to help him. Hang in there.
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Old 09-22-2015, 05:17 AM
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Hey Fruity
Please stay. Everyone has to go through detox and the help you're getting is really a gift. Try to see it that way. I have been to rehab and detox so I know what I'm talking about. I don't trust anything...anyone. That makes me really uncomfortable in places like rehab. But I have to remember they are there for me and know what is best. My thinking got me where I am....maybe its time to let someone else drive!
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Old 09-22-2015, 05:20 AM
  # 170 (permalink)  
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Hi Jemme

I'm glad you're sitting this next wedding out.

I know I'm a teenager when I drink...and maybe when I'm sober at times too Recovery for me can be as simple as acting like an adult at times. I even ask myself when I'm faced with a reactive decision "What would a wise woman do?"...usually stops me and makes me think..
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Old 09-22-2015, 05:25 AM
  # 171 (permalink)  
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Thank you for all the kind words. I had a rough night last night, better morning. On with day 3!
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Old 09-22-2015, 05:32 AM
  # 172 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Frickaflip233 View Post
Hi Fruity
So glad you're back. Good on you for going to detox. Try to really unplug and take this time for you. Don't cut out early, of anything. Stay the course. I know my mind gets so fouled up from booze that literally everything is a crisis. I can't sort out what isn't and what is stress. I try to really focus on only what I can control, not all the things I can't. You're dong the right thing, for you!
Ok its not you're dong, its you're doing.....the edit function was no longer available....
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Old 09-22-2015, 05:39 AM
  # 173 (permalink)  
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Good morning Class

Its a cool morning here in Idaho...still going to warm up again. I hope this is the last gasp of summer. I'm ready to wear boots!

Teenager has been having lots of headaches after school. Not sure what's up with that. She has a dr apt on friday for another issue so I'll ask then. She's kind of miserable right now...poor kid. Its hard for her to get up every morning at 5:30am. Not sure why school has to start so early. Stupid. And it would be hard for me too if I were drinking, but I'm not. Yay.

Nothing special about today...more of the same. Things are good though. Calm. Predictable. I'm so used to worrying about something but I really have little to chew on except the normal financial strains. Life is good.

Welcome to all the newcomers. Hang in there, it gets better. A lot of people in this class are really getting some momentum....makes me so happy.
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Old 09-22-2015, 06:07 AM
  # 174 (permalink)  
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Morning all. And welcome to the new folks.

Fruity, just to echo what others have said, stay through your detox. You wind up with 2 weeks and a brain that is at least in the early stages of starting to heal. It's something.

As opposed to yesterday, had a great morning with my kids. I told them both what a great job they had done. And I was calm and sober the whole morning too, so that certainly helped.

Looking forward to today. Have a late night at work because of some commitments so grandparents will be watching the kids for a bit before I get home. Should be there for bedtime though, which should make things smoother for them.

Hope everyone has a good sober day.
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Old 09-22-2015, 06:21 AM
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Day 9 here in the UK. I'm off to work in 30 minutes and so far today I've made a delicious meal to heat tonight when I get in (after 9pm). Have made my husband's sandwiches for work tomorrow. Have dyed the roots of my hair to keep up appearances. Had a healthy power lunch. Watched TV; managed some 'chill' time. This is a world away from my thinking 'ooh I have a 3pm start tomorrow, I can get hammered tonight (I.e. that would've been last night). I'd have rolled out of bed at 1/2pm if I was luckily. Just enough time for a quick shower and some dry-heaving led teeth cleaning to wash away my shame and any rancid alcohol odours. I'd be counting down the hours until my break so I could bust into the fresh air in an attempt to feel human again. As it stands? I feel GREAT!

Keep going everyone. Sending lots of positive vibes to you all. We got this schizzle!
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Old 09-22-2015, 06:24 AM
  # 176 (permalink)  
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Hello! Checking in with you guys again! It keeps me in perspective reading all of your posts, so I'm usually hanging around in the background hope ya'll don't mind! So glad to see most of you are doing well..Sending prayers out to Fruity, sounds like you may need some. It will get better...we are on your side and can relate to those negative feelings.
Frick! I love reading your posts! Glad youre so vocal..(I am too Lol) Your posts are great, truly!
Me I am doing just fine. I am on the path I am supposed to be and keeping myself in check to keep anxiety and epression at bay..I practice HALT (Hunger, Anger(Anxiety), Lonely, Tired)all through my day. Every day is not a joy ride but I do my best to make it the best day I can..
Wishing everyone peace and happiness on this beautiful Tuesday morning..I love the 24 hour thread because ppl usually post where they are living..
Southern Ky for me! ((Hug))!!
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Old 09-22-2015, 06:33 AM
  # 177 (permalink)  
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Good morning all! So much activity in the last 24 hours that it's hard to keep up. It's so good to see that those of you that broke down over the weekend are not giving up and want to keep at it. We all have weak moments, and stress can certainly give our AV momentum to override our best judgement. BUT, that doesn't mean we can't learn from it and keep moving forward. We can do this as long as we keep trying.

Welcome newcomers to the first few days of sobriety! SR is great to gain strength and perspective, support and encouragement. Stick it out and every day gets better. I'm at two weeks (after a 2 year bender...), and everything in my life is improving. I'm remembering that alcohol stole everything from me - my self-respect, my memory, my closeness with my DH, the respect of my children, my social activities, my job performance, the list is endless. Keeping that in perspective shuts my AV up in a hurry.

Wishing everyone a sober and stress-free day!
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Old 09-22-2015, 07:05 AM
  # 178 (permalink)  
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Good morning, everyone! I agree, Cali: It is great to see all the posts!
Midton, I hope that you are feeling better.
Fruity, I think it is amazing that you are in detox: that is such a wise and brave decision. Brava!
FBL--congrats on 12 days, you can do it.
And Juno, on 8--that is fantastic.
Gemma, I am thinking about you. What you said about your bf really resonated with me and some past relationships. For me, it was a chicken and an egg situation: did I drink because of the bf, or did I have this bf because I drank. Sobriety helps clear some things up, although not always in easy ways.

Yesterday, I had a very long day, but it felt super productive and I found myself calm and focused, moving from thing to thing with clarity and purpose. So wonderful! I even sat in a very contentious meeting, able to listen without enmeshment. That felt good.

Slept pretty good last night too. I woke up a few times, but I was able to roll back over and fall asleep.

14 days today! Thank you, all of you, for your support and wisdom. It has made a huge difference on this journey.
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Old 09-22-2015, 08:52 AM
  # 179 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by zenchaser View Post
Hi Arbor!
Hey Zen. How are you today? Haven't seen any recent posts.

Thread moves pretty quick with lots to read and digest. Everyone steer the course. It's worth it.
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Old 09-22-2015, 09:32 AM
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Two weeks today for me, which is pretty big. I've let my family thread go for now, I'm tired of thinking about it. All it does is get me bent out of sorts.

It's good to see people hanging in there. Keeps me motivated. Have a good day everyone.
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