(Not So) New - Frank's Thread Part 6
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Posts: 1,374
For any of you who need a pick-me-up, like Nesty was saying she needs, there are some great threads on SR and I want to post two links. You can go back and read/view past threads and you will have literally endless entertainment and laughter. I frequent them daily.
Glad to see you're all doing well. I miss you. <3 Vanecia, you sound so healthy and rock-steady and that reminds me of the times in my life when I was content to be a non-drinker. I know I can get back to that place within someday but I'm just not there right now.
Anyway, I hope you each check out these threads. SO much good stuff.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...part-13-a.html
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-part-7-a.html
Glad to see you're all doing well. I miss you. <3 Vanecia, you sound so healthy and rock-steady and that reminds me of the times in my life when I was content to be a non-drinker. I know I can get back to that place within someday but I'm just not there right now.
Anyway, I hope you each check out these threads. SO much good stuff.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...part-13-a.html
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-part-7-a.html
Member
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Auckland
Posts: 2,548
Thanks Cissy :-) I have checked out some of those posts on the post your non-smiley thread. They are fantastic - you should have a look, Nesty. I'll check out the other one too. Hope you are doing well, Cissy. You don't have to miss us! Join in anytime!
Nesty, I love the name Trouble. Sometimes pets name themselves, eh? Great you had a good time with your friend. I agree with Sao - no pressure, but we love keeping in touch.
Sao, such a bummer about the rugby. I felt so sorry for the coach. Such is life. My brother said that this instantly means a loss of 100k per 30 second advertisement slot. Stink for the tournament and English rugby as a whole. Was great to see Harry cheering them on. Ah well. Thems the breaks.
Lol...You reckon your ex-wife is/was 'trouble'. Poor Mr TS - he was like a lamb to the slaughter with his one. Spine chilling!!!
Have a great day, Lapidaslanders :-D
Nesty, I love the name Trouble. Sometimes pets name themselves, eh? Great you had a good time with your friend. I agree with Sao - no pressure, but we love keeping in touch.
Sao, such a bummer about the rugby. I felt so sorry for the coach. Such is life. My brother said that this instantly means a loss of 100k per 30 second advertisement slot. Stink for the tournament and English rugby as a whole. Was great to see Harry cheering them on. Ah well. Thems the breaks.
Lol...You reckon your ex-wife is/was 'trouble'. Poor Mr TS - he was like a lamb to the slaughter with his one. Spine chilling!!!
Have a great day, Lapidaslanders :-D
(((Hugs)))
saoutchik
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London
Posts: 16,172
Thanks for the retweets Cissy, you're right, there is good stuff on them
I wasn't shocked by the rugby, still disappointing though.
Spent today working on the Lancia. I have had an invitation to show at a classic car show next spring but it is touch and go on being ready by then
I wasn't shocked by the rugby, still disappointing though.
Spent today working on the Lancia. I have had an invitation to show at a classic car show next spring but it is touch and go on being ready by then
Member
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Auckland
Posts: 2,548
I watched quite a few on the non-smiley thread in bed last night. Some major lols there....don't know where you guys find those gems!
Great, Sao, added motivation. I'll never forget an old convertible lotus I saw at a classic car show once. Teal metallic green and cream leather interior. Gorgeous.
I hope Trouble is keeping out of trouble, Nesty :-)
Great, Sao, added motivation. I'll never forget an old convertible lotus I saw at a classic car show once. Teal metallic green and cream leather interior. Gorgeous.
I hope Trouble is keeping out of trouble, Nesty :-)
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 4,860
Cissy, thank you for your kind comments above.
I do feel solid in my sobriety. I'm also humbled by the fact that I was addicted to alcohol; there's always going to be a wolf at the door. My job is to keep the wolf as far away from the door as I possibly can. There's no such thing as a recovery rock star, after all.
If it helps people here, I can tell you a little bit about me. There was never a clear-cut moment when this transition happened but I came to understand that I had to -- and I know this sounds a little cliche -- live in the moment, no matter what it was.
There was a moment, though, when I was tested and it was kind of like everything was revealed to me. When I was 10 months sober, my father died suddenly in his sleep. It was completely unexpected. I loved him very much.
A couple days after Dad died, one of the old neighborhood kids showed up at the door with a six-pack -- "figured you could use this." In a split second, I had to confront the one thing that alcohol could do for me: make me go numb. Beyond that, my mother was at my brother's house and I was likely to have a couple hours alone in my parents' home. And I felt very alone, beyond my physical circumstances.
I could have done taken it without anyone knowing anything. Except me.
I sent my old friend on his way with the six-pack, told him to give the brewskis a good home.
The one thing I cannot do anymore is go numb. I had to relinquish that and live in the moments -- even the hardest ones -- in a state of clarity. When I turned down the beer that day, the work I'd done in the 10 preceding months had all led up to that realization.
There was a whole other dimension to that realization. Living in clarity during tough times is paralleled by the rest of the time when you live fully and are able enjoy your existence. In all honesty, when I look back at the bad years -- especially toward the end -- I never felt good physically. Never. Emotionally and spiritually? Rotting.
I feel good now.
That's the trade-off. I think it's a much better deal.
And in those moments -- fleeting and infrequent though they are -- when I wish I could go numb, I rely upon gratitude. It works; I've not had a real craving in a long time.
I share this with you so that everyone on this thread knows this will happen for you, too. It may be a sudden realization, a "wow!" It may be a gradual transformation. You may not even realize how deeply it's become embedded in you until you're tested, though for the people on this thread, I hope your test isn't as acute as mine was.
Or it be when you feel the contentment that you didn't think was possible anymore.
But it is all within our reach. Supporting one another helps us attain it and stay there. And I intend to stay where I am now, with help of others like you guys here. I love being sober and I care very much about the SR community.
I do feel solid in my sobriety. I'm also humbled by the fact that I was addicted to alcohol; there's always going to be a wolf at the door. My job is to keep the wolf as far away from the door as I possibly can. There's no such thing as a recovery rock star, after all.
If it helps people here, I can tell you a little bit about me. There was never a clear-cut moment when this transition happened but I came to understand that I had to -- and I know this sounds a little cliche -- live in the moment, no matter what it was.
There was a moment, though, when I was tested and it was kind of like everything was revealed to me. When I was 10 months sober, my father died suddenly in his sleep. It was completely unexpected. I loved him very much.
A couple days after Dad died, one of the old neighborhood kids showed up at the door with a six-pack -- "figured you could use this." In a split second, I had to confront the one thing that alcohol could do for me: make me go numb. Beyond that, my mother was at my brother's house and I was likely to have a couple hours alone in my parents' home. And I felt very alone, beyond my physical circumstances.
I could have done taken it without anyone knowing anything. Except me.
I sent my old friend on his way with the six-pack, told him to give the brewskis a good home.
The one thing I cannot do anymore is go numb. I had to relinquish that and live in the moments -- even the hardest ones -- in a state of clarity. When I turned down the beer that day, the work I'd done in the 10 preceding months had all led up to that realization.
There was a whole other dimension to that realization. Living in clarity during tough times is paralleled by the rest of the time when you live fully and are able enjoy your existence. In all honesty, when I look back at the bad years -- especially toward the end -- I never felt good physically. Never. Emotionally and spiritually? Rotting.
I feel good now.
That's the trade-off. I think it's a much better deal.
And in those moments -- fleeting and infrequent though they are -- when I wish I could go numb, I rely upon gratitude. It works; I've not had a real craving in a long time.
I share this with you so that everyone on this thread knows this will happen for you, too. It may be a sudden realization, a "wow!" It may be a gradual transformation. You may not even realize how deeply it's become embedded in you until you're tested, though for the people on this thread, I hope your test isn't as acute as mine was.
Or it be when you feel the contentment that you didn't think was possible anymore.
But it is all within our reach. Supporting one another helps us attain it and stay there. And I intend to stay where I am now, with help of others like you guys here. I love being sober and I care very much about the SR community.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Auckland
Posts: 2,548
You are so generous, Venecia. It's a timely post for me because I feel like I may be in 'the transition' right now. I've had countless relapses over the years, but since joining SR - over these past 3 months or so - a change has gradually taken place.
I also drank to go numb and check out for a bit. My partner and I have had the assault of one child and the death of another child to cope with. I pretty much lost it for a few years with my face down in a bottle of sauvignon blanc every night. I've hated myself for it and have punished my body really badly. It's stunted my growth in all areas, and I've hurt others as well as myself.
But of late my tolerance for emotion has increased a little while my will to stomach the negative consequences of drinking has decreased significantly. It feels like the scales have tipped in favour of sobriety....finally.
The contentment is growing :-)
I hope I am not tested again anytime soon in this ginger phase too. I need to get a few solid months under my belt, and keep developing new habits. I can actually feel a fire has been kindled and there's an enthusiasm for a sober life. I never, ever thought I could honestly say that. I have to hold on really tight now.
:
I also drank to go numb and check out for a bit. My partner and I have had the assault of one child and the death of another child to cope with. I pretty much lost it for a few years with my face down in a bottle of sauvignon blanc every night. I've hated myself for it and have punished my body really badly. It's stunted my growth in all areas, and I've hurt others as well as myself.
But of late my tolerance for emotion has increased a little while my will to stomach the negative consequences of drinking has decreased significantly. It feels like the scales have tipped in favour of sobriety....finally.
The contentment is growing :-)
I hope I am not tested again anytime soon in this ginger phase too. I need to get a few solid months under my belt, and keep developing new habits. I can actually feel a fire has been kindled and there's an enthusiasm for a sober life. I never, ever thought I could honestly say that. I have to hold on really tight now.
:
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Posts: 1,374
Originally Posted by Venecia 
Cissy, thank you for your kind comments above.
I do feel solid in my sobriety. I'm also humbled by the fact that I was addicted to alcohol; there's always going to be a wolf at the door. My job is to keep the wolf as far away from the door as I possibly can. There's no such thing as a recovery rock star, after all.
If it helps people here, I can tell you a little bit about me. There was never a clear-cut moment when this transition happened but I came to understand that I had to -- and I know this sounds a little cliche -- live in the moment, no matter what it was.
There was a moment, though, when I was tested and it was kind of like everything was revealed to me. When I was 10 months sober, my father died suddenly in his sleep. It was completely unexpected. I loved him very much.
A couple days after Dad died, one of the old neighborhood kids showed up at the door with a six-pack -- "figured you could use this." In a split second, I had to confront the one thing that alcohol could do for me: make me go numb. Beyond that, my mother was at my brother's house and I was likely to have a couple hours alone in my parents' home. And I felt very alone, beyond my physical circumstances.
I could have done taken it without anyone knowing anything. Except me.
I sent my old friend on his way with the six-pack, told him to give the brewskis a good home.
The one thing I cannot do anymore is go numb. I had to relinquish that and live in the moments -- even the hardest ones -- in a state of clarity. When I turned down the beer that day, the work I'd done in the 10 preceding months had all led up to that realization.
There was a whole other dimension to that realization. Living in clarity during tough times is paralleled by the rest of the time when you live fully and are able enjoy your existence. In all honesty, when I look back at the bad years -- especially toward the end -- I never felt good physically. Never. Emotionally and spiritually? Rotting.
I feel good now.
That's the trade-off. I think it's a much better deal.
And in those moments -- fleeting and infrequent though they are -- when I wish I could go numb, I rely upon gratitude. It works; I've not had a real craving in a long time.
I share this with you so that everyone on this thread knows this will happen for you, too. It may be a sudden realization, a "wow!" It may be a gradual transformation. You may not even realize how deeply it's become embedded in you until you're tested, though for the people on this thread, I hope your test isn't as acute as mine was.
Or it be when you feel the contentment that you didn't think was possible anymore.
But it is all within our reach. Supporting one another helps us attain it and stay there. And I intend to stay where I am now, with help of others like you guys here. I love being sober and I care very much about the SR community.
I do feel solid in my sobriety. I'm also humbled by the fact that I was addicted to alcohol; there's always going to be a wolf at the door. My job is to keep the wolf as far away from the door as I possibly can. There's no such thing as a recovery rock star, after all.
If it helps people here, I can tell you a little bit about me. There was never a clear-cut moment when this transition happened but I came to understand that I had to -- and I know this sounds a little cliche -- live in the moment, no matter what it was.
There was a moment, though, when I was tested and it was kind of like everything was revealed to me. When I was 10 months sober, my father died suddenly in his sleep. It was completely unexpected. I loved him very much.
A couple days after Dad died, one of the old neighborhood kids showed up at the door with a six-pack -- "figured you could use this." In a split second, I had to confront the one thing that alcohol could do for me: make me go numb. Beyond that, my mother was at my brother's house and I was likely to have a couple hours alone in my parents' home. And I felt very alone, beyond my physical circumstances.
I could have done taken it without anyone knowing anything. Except me.
I sent my old friend on his way with the six-pack, told him to give the brewskis a good home.
The one thing I cannot do anymore is go numb. I had to relinquish that and live in the moments -- even the hardest ones -- in a state of clarity. When I turned down the beer that day, the work I'd done in the 10 preceding months had all led up to that realization.
There was a whole other dimension to that realization. Living in clarity during tough times is paralleled by the rest of the time when you live fully and are able enjoy your existence. In all honesty, when I look back at the bad years -- especially toward the end -- I never felt good physically. Never. Emotionally and spiritually? Rotting.
I feel good now.
That's the trade-off. I think it's a much better deal.
And in those moments -- fleeting and infrequent though they are -- when I wish I could go numb, I rely upon gratitude. It works; I've not had a real craving in a long time.
I share this with you so that everyone on this thread knows this will happen for you, too. It may be a sudden realization, a "wow!" It may be a gradual transformation. You may not even realize how deeply it's become embedded in you until you're tested, though for the people on this thread, I hope your test isn't as acute as mine was.
Or it be when you feel the contentment that you didn't think was possible anymore.
But it is all within our reach. Supporting one another helps us attain it and stay there. And I intend to stay where I am now, with help of others like you guys here. I love being sober and I care very much about the SR community.
I love this, Venecia. I really respond well to hearing the stories of other people's lives because I have so many of my own and like to share them too. I'm truly sorry about how your Dad passed. My husband died in his sleep too. He was very ill (diabetes, on dialysis, and other complications) but like you said about your Dad, no one expected it. I'm haunted by that time in my life to this day.I love that you sent the beer home with your friend.
I hope we can all get to that place that you spoke of and can see that each decision we make in those moments of testing really have an impact on our destiny. 
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Posts: 1,374
Originally Posted by Tooshabby
You are so generous, Venecia. It's a timely post for me because I feel like I may be in 'the transition' right now. I've had countless relapses over the years, but since joining SR - over these past 3 months or so - a change has gradually taken place.
I also drank to go numb and check out for a bit. My partner and I have had the assault of one child and the death of another child to cope with. I pretty much lost it for a few years with my face down in a bottle of sauvignon blanc every night. I've hated myself for it and have punished my body really badly. It's stunted my growth in all areas, and I've hurt others as well as myself.
But of late my tolerance for emotion has increased a little while my will to stomach the negative consequences of drinking has decreased significantly. It feels like the scales have tipped in favour of sobriety....finally.
The contentment is growing :-)
I hope I am not tested again anytime soon in this ginger phase too. I need to get a few solid months under my belt, and keep developing new habits. I can actually feel a fire has been kindled and there's an enthusiasm for a sober life. I never, ever thought I could honestly say that. I have to hold on really tight now.
:
I also drank to go numb and check out for a bit. My partner and I have had the assault of one child and the death of another child to cope with. I pretty much lost it for a few years with my face down in a bottle of sauvignon blanc every night. I've hated myself for it and have punished my body really badly. It's stunted my growth in all areas, and I've hurt others as well as myself.
But of late my tolerance for emotion has increased a little while my will to stomach the negative consequences of drinking has decreased significantly. It feels like the scales have tipped in favour of sobriety....finally.
The contentment is growing :-)
I hope I am not tested again anytime soon in this ginger phase too. I need to get a few solid months under my belt, and keep developing new habits. I can actually feel a fire has been kindled and there's an enthusiasm for a sober life. I never, ever thought I could honestly say that. I have to hold on really tight now.
:
Member
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Auckland
Posts: 2,548
Thank you, Cissy, that's so kind of you. I know this may sound strange, but I am really okay with it all now. It was my partner's son that died nearly ten years ago, and the other happened several years before that. So the grief has been processed, if you know what I mean. But yes, there were some really rough years that added a lot of fuel to the fire of my drinking problem.
I'm so sorry about your husband, (((Cissy))). I can't imagine how hard that must have been, and still is.
I'm so sorry about your husband, (((Cissy))). I can't imagine how hard that must have been, and still is.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Auckland
Posts: 2,548
Thanks, Sao. I really appreciate that.
Nesty, don't worry about us, okay? I would love to hear how your three little darlings are. What does Trouble look like? Did you check out the non-smiley thread? It's sooooooo good :-)
Nesty, don't worry about us, okay? I would love to hear how your three little darlings are. What does Trouble look like? Did you check out the non-smiley thread? It's sooooooo good :-)
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 4,860
Thanks.
Shabby and Cissy, you've endured far more than me. Hugs.
Just re-read my post. Yowza, a couple weird word combos -- that's what I get for writing without a good proofreading. I really do know better than to write things including "I could have done taken it."
Take care, nice people.
Shabby and Cissy, you've endured far more than me. Hugs.
Just re-read my post. Yowza, a couple weird word combos -- that's what I get for writing without a good proofreading. I really do know better than to write things including "I could have done taken it."
Take care, nice people.
saoutchik
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London
Posts: 16,172
France 3 Cissy - Frances 2nd largest publicly owned TV station and the subject of a lot of bad publicity recently over some sexist ads (ironically to boast about the number of female presenters on the station)
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
