Class of July 2013 Part 22
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Midwest
Posts: 1,697
Thanks all I made it 
Theses urges felt very strong. My mind was trying to trick me. I am going to be a designated driver this weekend so that will motivate me. Got some sparkling water and dark chocolate. Its seems to help my mood and cravings.
Theses urges felt very strong. My mind was trying to trick me. I am going to be a designated driver this weekend so that will motivate me. Got some sparkling water and dark chocolate. Its seems to help my mood and cravings.
Do your best
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 67,047
Morning Julyers I'm off out shopping with Mrs sw no housework just us two on a romantic stroll when I woke up she said I look exhausted I said thanks you don't look too bad yourself lol
Just finishing a cuppa then its stretches then out
Just finishing a cuppa then its stretches then out
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Midwest
Posts: 1,697
Checking in this morning. Stress, being tired and low blood sugar made me pissed off. I am forever grateful that i stayed sober though. I know i would reap no benefits from going back down that road. I am sure yoday will be better
How do you cope with bad day? When you feel like hitting yhe F it button? The day wasn't really that bad in retropect..it just just high stress and emotions. It happens once in a while. I ussually tried to ride out the wave. Thank you for your support. It made me feel much better.
How do you cope with bad day? When you feel like hitting yhe F it button? The day wasn't really that bad in retropect..it just just high stress and emotions. It happens once in a while. I ussually tried to ride out the wave. Thank you for your support. It made me feel much better.
Administrator
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,312
Bad days happen - they happen to us all alcoholics or not.
The thing is - I only have bad days now, not bad weeks or months, or years like I used to when I was drinking.
I usually find my bad days are not so bad anymore, cos I know they'll pass and I'll be ok...y'know?
There's always support here too.
Hope the rest of your weekend is better letitgo
D
The thing is - I only have bad days now, not bad weeks or months, or years like I used to when I was drinking.
I usually find my bad days are not so bad anymore, cos I know they'll pass and I'll be ok...y'know?
There's always support here too.
Hope the rest of your weekend is better letitgo
D
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Canada
Posts: 3,984
Hi letitgo, you did well, good for you. I know how tough it can be.
Croissant, I'm not sure about the computer needs. I will have to investigate what will serve me best.
I'm not doing well folks and I'm sorry to sound like a broken record. I just feel I don't fit in anywhere anymore. I'm incredibly lonely, but I'm done trying to find a partner, it's brought me nothing but sadness and frustration. My one single girlfriend is now happily in a relationship, he moved in with her. I don't know what I'm trying to say, I dread time with my family because they all drink. My sister emailed me yesterday and was talking about drinking, in response to my telling her that I can no longer numb out, and she said she gets respite from drinking, that it makes her feel better. I used to love to visit her in England and we'd go on a long walk with the dogs then sit with them in a pub garden, drinking. I've no joy, I feel sad all the time. I'm having difficulty just envisioning what my life will be, the status quo is horrible, horribly sad and worthless. I emailed a friend for some support, but she hasn't got back to me. I imagine I'm wearing everyone out.
How much can I keep saying the same thing here over and over? I'm so tired of living, there's no joy, nor looking forward. I cry all the time. I'm going to the symphony tonight with my friend and her boyfriend and her parents, I feel flat and am not looking forward to it.
I honestly can't feel hope at the moment. I know we all struggle mightily, but I wish I could catch a break? I'm going to continue to go to AA meetings, I cry all through them and hopefully meet with a sponsor next week or so. I've always felt like something of a misfit, a loner and I don't know about the program, the giving over to a higher power confounds me. But what am I going to do? Every morning I wake up, I wish I didn't have to wake up. My psychiatrist is trying me on 3 days on and antidepressant and then 4 days off, a cycle that he hopes will help my brain not outwit the AD effect, something to do with receptors being occupied and then cleared. I think I've tried everything under the sun and feel hopeless. I got a brief respite from ECT, but now all I have left of it is memory problems.
Maybe some of us just aren't equipped to cope with the world, with adversity?
I'd welcome an exit, but not by my own hand, I can't do that to others.
I'd just like to enjoy normal things, but I'm not, and if I feel the same way in another year, what then? I know, a day at a time. I'm just too sad and I'm sorry for going on and on, but I'm quietly going crazy here and don't know what to do.
I can't drink, but I'm not happy about who I've become thus far.
Croissant, I'm not sure about the computer needs. I will have to investigate what will serve me best.
I'm not doing well folks and I'm sorry to sound like a broken record. I just feel I don't fit in anywhere anymore. I'm incredibly lonely, but I'm done trying to find a partner, it's brought me nothing but sadness and frustration. My one single girlfriend is now happily in a relationship, he moved in with her. I don't know what I'm trying to say, I dread time with my family because they all drink. My sister emailed me yesterday and was talking about drinking, in response to my telling her that I can no longer numb out, and she said she gets respite from drinking, that it makes her feel better. I used to love to visit her in England and we'd go on a long walk with the dogs then sit with them in a pub garden, drinking. I've no joy, I feel sad all the time. I'm having difficulty just envisioning what my life will be, the status quo is horrible, horribly sad and worthless. I emailed a friend for some support, but she hasn't got back to me. I imagine I'm wearing everyone out.
How much can I keep saying the same thing here over and over? I'm so tired of living, there's no joy, nor looking forward. I cry all the time. I'm going to the symphony tonight with my friend and her boyfriend and her parents, I feel flat and am not looking forward to it.
I honestly can't feel hope at the moment. I know we all struggle mightily, but I wish I could catch a break? I'm going to continue to go to AA meetings, I cry all through them and hopefully meet with a sponsor next week or so. I've always felt like something of a misfit, a loner and I don't know about the program, the giving over to a higher power confounds me. But what am I going to do? Every morning I wake up, I wish I didn't have to wake up. My psychiatrist is trying me on 3 days on and antidepressant and then 4 days off, a cycle that he hopes will help my brain not outwit the AD effect, something to do with receptors being occupied and then cleared. I think I've tried everything under the sun and feel hopeless. I got a brief respite from ECT, but now all I have left of it is memory problems.
Maybe some of us just aren't equipped to cope with the world, with adversity?
I'd welcome an exit, but not by my own hand, I can't do that to others.
I'd just like to enjoy normal things, but I'm not, and if I feel the same way in another year, what then? I know, a day at a time. I'm just too sad and I'm sorry for going on and on, but I'm quietly going crazy here and don't know what to do.
I can't drink, but I'm not happy about who I've become thus far.
Administrator
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,312
Leshar, every time I've thought I was done with changes, something happens and more changes happen.
I really believe in my sig line.
I know it might seem like you're stuck in a rut but I still maintain you've come a very long way - I see no reason why you won't continue to grow and change, my friend
Don't lose heart - and don't stop looking for healthy positive solutions
You deserve happiness
D
I really believe in my sig line.
I know it might seem like you're stuck in a rut but I still maintain you've come a very long way - I see no reason why you won't continue to grow and change, my friend
Don't lose heart - and don't stop looking for healthy positive solutions
You deserve happiness
D
Guest
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Sydney Australia
Posts: 4,225
Leshar, I understand you said before you come here to vent, so I won't go on and on with advice, and I know I can't understand the full degree of what you are going through.
I asked once before, a while back, If there were some kind of depression support group or similar in your area you could attend? Where you could find some peer support? Perhaps it's worth asking your doc? Or the hospital you stayed in if they have some kind of outpatient support?
I asked once before, a while back, If there were some kind of depression support group or similar in your area you could attend? Where you could find some peer support? Perhaps it's worth asking your doc? Or the hospital you stayed in if they have some kind of outpatient support?
Do your best
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 67,047
You done excellent not drinking LetItGo honesty amazing bud
Leshar I am sorry you feel like this & I hope your psychiatrist can find a right balance with the anti-deppressents
I found a few links that might help with this Leshar I agree with D your one of my recovery heroes when you feel like this I just think of how much you have done to stay sober & to stay healthy in my eyes your a really amazing person Leshar
DepressionHurts.ca - Home
Depression - Community Support - Body & Health
Defeat Depression
Leshar if I can help in anyway just ask I have a lot of time for you & all the Julyers XOXO
Leshar I am sorry you feel like this & I hope your psychiatrist can find a right balance with the anti-deppressents
I found a few links that might help with this Leshar I agree with D your one of my recovery heroes when you feel like this I just think of how much you have done to stay sober & to stay healthy in my eyes your a really amazing person Leshar
DepressionHurts.ca - Home
Depression - Community Support - Body & Health
Defeat Depression
Leshar if I can help in anyway just ask I have a lot of time for you & all the Julyers XOXO
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Australia
Posts: 11,351
Love the pics Wolfy thanks 
Leshar , you are severely depressed . I can diagnose that from oceans away.
Each time you go off them , the relentless crying starts, the hopelessness, the solitude , then after that come the lethargy , the not caring , not wanting to shower etc.
I really hope this 3 days on 4 days off works ? It sounds absurd to me , but I'm not a doctor.
I was feeling like you, disappointed when you wake up and you're still here.
I don't feel that way now I'm back on my antis. I shudder to think I felt that way.
You are not a broken record! You're sad. You're sharing with your friends.
That's what friends are for darling one
Keep posting and keep letting it out. Cry and cry for a release. It will get better , I promise.
Try to stop looking ahead and just. Live for today. If you get by today then do the same thing tomorrow . You don't need to look at a big picture.
Today , just today. Tomorrow will take care of itself and the past has gone.just today honey. One day at a time ok. That's what we all must do to get by.
Love you
Leshar , you are severely depressed . I can diagnose that from oceans away.
Each time you go off them , the relentless crying starts, the hopelessness, the solitude , then after that come the lethargy , the not caring , not wanting to shower etc.
I really hope this 3 days on 4 days off works ? It sounds absurd to me , but I'm not a doctor.
I was feeling like you, disappointed when you wake up and you're still here.
I don't feel that way now I'm back on my antis. I shudder to think I felt that way.
You are not a broken record! You're sad. You're sharing with your friends.
That's what friends are for darling one
Keep posting and keep letting it out. Cry and cry for a release. It will get better , I promise.
Try to stop looking ahead and just. Live for today. If you get by today then do the same thing tomorrow . You don't need to look at a big picture.
Today , just today. Tomorrow will take care of itself and the past has gone.just today honey. One day at a time ok. That's what we all must do to get by.
Love you
Guest
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Sydney Australia
Posts: 4,225
Originally Posted by Croissant 
Leshar, I understand you said before you come here to vent, so I won't go on and on with advice, and I know I can't understand the full degree of what you are going through.
I asked once before, a while back, If there were some kind of depression support group or similar in your area you could attend? Where you could find some peer support? Perhaps it's worth asking your doc? Or the hospital you stayed in if they have some kind of outpatient support?
I asked once before, a while back, If there were some kind of depression support group or similar in your area you could attend? Where you could find some peer support? Perhaps it's worth asking your doc? Or the hospital you stayed in if they have some kind of outpatient support?
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