elizke

Thank you so much for all the support yesterday, I did NOT have a drink, I lied in bed and played candy crush until my phone died. Now the weekend is here, this is hard but I am determined to be a week sober come monday

kittycat3

Hey all, I jinxed myself with saying I don't have issues with sleep. Lots of insomnia last night, I got maybe 4 hours. I don't know if it's nicotine withdrawal or depression/anxiety. I don't think it's alcohol WDs, I'm on day 4 today and before my binge Monday I had several weeks of sobriety.

Still feeling regret and ashamed about my slip. Scared. But grateful. I'm sober today and I know deep down I can fully control never having to go "there" again. So I pray to my HP to make me strong, one day at a time.

kittycat3

Way to go benice, I love that you have a rehearsed plan! That's the way to do it! I will need to do that soon I'm sure.

JL2014

Woo hoo , Elizke !!
Cheering for you !!

Willow3

Hi all. Sorry I didn't have a chance to catch up with all the posts. I'm hoping to do that later. I just wanted to check in on evening of day 28. It's Friday and I can honestly say the thought of a drink hasn't entered my head. Progress.

Hope everyone has a nice non regretful sober weekend.

patricia68

White-knuckling it today...

I'm going to a fast food restaurant with my boy, hopefully this sadness will lift...

I can do this...right?

Neverthought

Yes, a lot going on in the August class. A lot of great efforts and a lot to catching up to do reading-wise. I'm about 1/2-way caught up.

I'm on day (3). Yesterday, I ran out to grab some goods and stopped at the liquor store. I sat in parking lot, my car running and managed to fight the urge. I'm off work today so, yesterday was like a Friday night. And today was just as challenging during the late morning. But so far, I'm winning the battle, but as I've experience many, many times...a long way to go.

But again, I've read very nice, honest posts last night and this morning that helped me immensely. A lot of encouragement in this class. Thank you all so much!

Stay strong........

Neverthought

Absolutely, you can do this. I did some W-K myself today, but we can do this. I've been eating and drinking fluids to stay full. That really helped me last night.

TroyW

Of course you can. Dig deep, the strength is there, and you know it is.

Watch this:

TroyW

"Don't try to quit! You already in pain, you already hurtin! Get a reward from it!"

Wow, what a cool quote from that vid I posted above. I'm going to make that my sig.

Neverthought

The AV is tricky. In the early days of sobriety we gain confidence by winning against the AV (urges). Every win builds strength. Sometimes it's many wins in a day, or a few wins during the week. Eventually as your strength grows, you may only have a few victories a month and than less and less. However, to me and I've been through this too many times, those stretches that lack battles against your AV create somewhat of a calmness. And then that is when the AV pounces on you. So, it's good to keep a journal or re-read your comments and comments from others to help keep you guard up. Because one thing is for sure, addiction is always there. It doesn't sleep. It may seem that way, but in my opinion, it is you learning how to cope and live with meaning and being in control. Now, you don't have to be looking over your shoulder all of the time, you just have train yourself to move on and not get caught up in the mental struggles of addiction. We need to know the triggers and have a distraction that puts us back on the straight and narrow.

I have not been controlled for a long time. I may have had bouts of sobriety in the past 4-5 years, but until I quit for good, I don't think I'll ever be in full control.

I wrote this for Three reasons. (1) because of what I just went through the last three days. I had some rough battles and it was hell. Though, now I have that feeling, once again, of confidence and strength and what I need to do to convince myself to stay the course. (2) Because I need to look back at this to remind myself of the journey ahead. (3) For those that are new to this, you very well may go through the same experience mentioned above.

I hope it helps at least one person.

Stray Strong.....NT

kittycat3

Yes Patricia you can do this!!!! Tell us more about what's going on. Talk to us, use us as a sounding board or listening ear. Just don't drink!!!

kittycat3

Way to go NVT on staying strong while in the parking lot. Can you take another route for the short term so you don't have to get close by? I know there are several places I will be avoiding at least for a while.....

Neverthought

Thank you so much!

Yes, I will be avoiding that. Not ironic, however, I chose to run to the store very near the liquor store. That was planned.......I guess I came of it lucky...

coloradochemist

Thanks for all the welcoming messages yesterday everyone. Today is day 12 and is thus far the best I have felt. Although I am starting to wear down at work. I will not drink today and I look forward to tomorrow. Good luck everyone. Just one more weekend in August and then we can begin work on another month.

Neverthought

Nothing to be ashamed about and "regret" has negative connotation. Stay positive and congrats on several weeks prior and the fact the back on track and before you know it, you'll be thinking, "it's been several weeks again. And we'll ride it out from there.

lovehoops

Wow...lots to catch up on! I know it's Friday and tough for so many of us..
Be nice...glad you have a plan and good luck!!!!
Patricia...yes you can do this...we can all do this!! Stay strong!!!
Glad you made the smarter choiceNVT..wAy to go.
I forgot who mentioned about weight gain or loss??? I am definitely in the gain column. Frustrating but true. Someone on e said better to gain weight and be sober...you can't get pulled over for being fat!!!

Happy Friday evening all xo

Denial101

Stay strong ya'll! We can do this. I'm on...wait...I don't remember...19 days now? I kind of stopped counting...been extremely extremely busy! Which is a good thing, keeping mind off of drinking all together, for the most part. I have only had a few run-ins with av...and it was fairly easy to squash the voice. I just keep thinking of why I am doing this, and all the negative consequences of drinking for me. It is hard though, it's everywhere you go! I have started to play a secret game though, almost like I'm "above" the alcohol...like I was just at the grocery and some college kids were in the liquor isle stocking up for the weekend ahead, undoubtedly, and I just had this feeling of smugness come over me, like, I don't NEED that to have a good time! Luckily for me, I am an extrovert and the life of the party, drinking or not, so I can still have plenty of fun completely sober. For me it had just become to habitual, ritualistic, and ridiculous to be realistic for the rest of my life. So I said BUH-BYE booze and I am so so happy I did!!!

Good luck to all of you in the upcoming weekend! We can do this!!!

GBluewater

For anyone struggling today or feeling nervous about the weekend, you are all so much stronger than you realize. Some people are never even able to learn how to point themselves in the right direction. But not us. We're here, and its not an accident.
Be kind to yourselves. Everyone is doing such a great job. I have a feeling for every one of us posting there is probably another just reading along. I think this class might be bigger than we realize. Hello silent SR friends! We are pulling for you too!
i made the difficult decision not to accompany friends out to hear some music a bar tonight. Somehow a pizza at home and Netflix seems more my speed... My dog is happy about this but I just feel like a crazy person trying to figure out what my new normal looks like.

PennyLane76

Yes, stay strong Patricia. I am still recovering from Mondays binge, it was so hard on me, dont do it!