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Class Of December 2013 - Part 9

Old 10-24-2015, 03:21 PM
  # 181 (permalink)  
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I really love his New York album. Still play several of those tunes, and I'll be playing some at upcoming gigs. I do Romeo and Juliet but in a higher register. It rocks.
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Old 10-24-2015, 04:26 PM
  # 182 (permalink)  
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hey guys, hope y'all are well, I had a love hate relationship with this album... didn't care for most of it as I recall ... but I would lift the needle and play the intro to sweet jane over and over countless times. Loved that guitar work.

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Old 10-24-2015, 05:32 PM
  # 183 (permalink)  
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New York was much later - 89. Prophetic lyrics:

I'll take Manhattan in a garbage bag with Latin written on it that says
"It's hard to give a **** these days"
Manhattan's sinking like a rock, into the filthy Hudson what a shock
they wrote a book about it, they said it was like ancient Rome
The perfume burned his eyes holding tightly to her thighs
and something flickered for a minute and then it vanished and was gone

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J7yS...Tvib38&index=1
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Old 10-24-2015, 06:07 PM
  # 184 (permalink)  
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got to admit I haven't listened as much to the 80s stuff - I may have to now.
Curse you Zero LOL

D
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Old 10-26-2015, 03:10 AM
  # 185 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by zerothehero View Post
Well...I'm sorry you're hungover. Your story, though, is timely for me. I'm at 22 months and have had some "I'm not really an alcoholic and I could probably do moderation" kind of thoughts. Good reminder that I'm likely fooling myself. I need to stick with the never again mentality, though I can relate to what you said about wishing you were normal. It's hard not to beat myself up for being a loser. We're not losers - we're just drunks. Anyway, I hope things get better for you.
Thanks man, I appreciate it. And very happy if my story can help in any way!
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Old 10-26-2015, 03:12 AM
  # 186 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by jackrussell View Post
Actual: you've certainly got some pretty good insight on what's going on with your affair with booze. I guess that we can tell ourselves what we want to hear when it comes to the idea of having just one drink. Or just a few drinks tonight. I've reeled myself in that way so many times; and continue to do so, actually. Once you've crossed the threshold into that alluring cozy room, you fall. There is no cozy room, of course.
Looks to me like you are getting back onto a healthy path. Or at least thinking of planning to consider trying to attempt to take steps to formulate a strategy to try to rediscover a thread that might lead to a way to get back onto a healthy path. Which is a good start.
Good man.
Yep. And I think what I've learned this time around is that a relapse doesn't mean you've totally failed, or that you can use it as an excuse to continue using. It was my first time ever getting sober after realizing I had a problem, so after getting off the wagon and a few months of drinking where I realized my "experiment" had failed, I kind of threw in the towel. Now I know for next time, you just gotta get back up and try it again.
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Old 10-26-2015, 03:15 AM
  # 187 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by LBrain View Post
Actual - it's tough... I was in a similar situation years ago, my girlfriend was a drinker and I was trying to not be at the time... I guess it was my first and last attempt at moderation. I went downhill quickly. Another ten+ years of no holds barred drinking...

The thing is, you know and understand the issues you face. Getting back on track may seem insurmountable at times. But you know you can do it. It takes a solid commitment to yourself. And it also makes us become more choosy in our relationships, whether it be with casual friends or a romance. Altering my lifestyle is a huge part of being successful as I go forward. And if it means dropping 'friends' then that's what it takes. AND, we have to swallow our pride. If someone we are dating suggests we get drunk - or drink at all - we MUST be able to say we don't drink, can't drink, under any circumstances. If they don't like it then we have to send them packing. There are many more people who don't drink out there. We have never been aware of them, but they do exist. Many more than we realize.
All good points, thank you
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Old 10-26-2015, 03:20 AM
  # 188 (permalink)  
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Haven't had a drink since Thursday. Can't remember the last time I took 3 days off. Went to a meeting early Sunday. Have another on Tuesday. Gonna try to string together some time here, one day at a time.
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Old 10-26-2015, 04:56 AM
  # 189 (permalink)  
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Glad you are getting back to not drinking ActualA. 3 days is a good start and getting involved helps.
May I suggest you read the "Crash Course" of rational recovery or AVRT, whichever one it is. I did that. I didn't go any further than that. I don't read their literature or get involved with all that if offered. One of the things they say is to stay away from 'recovery groups'. The thought there is that you become dependent on them and that are taught if you don't continue 100% with a 'program' you are more likely to relapse.

As I said, I never got to deep into it. But just understanding what the "crash course" tries to convey and embracing that idea can be liberating.
It helps to understand and how to commit to never drinking again.

That said, use all available resources to help you and guide you as necessary. If it helps, then use it.

One of the first steps regardless of which path you choose on your sobriety journey is acceptance. Doing the crash course helps very many in that area. It is a kind of "aha" moment. It also introduces the AV concept. Any thought of drinking whether it be an event or just a habitual reliance on drinking is nothing more than your addictive voice trying to get the drink it needs. There are many metaphors used, but the bottom line is that it is a battle within your brain. Your reasonable thoughts vs your addictive voice (thoughts). Learn to recognize it for what it is. You can be stronger than your AV. It's only a thought and nothing more. Don't listen to it, it only cares about one thing.

I know of many who use AVRT and still go to meetings. Get the most help you can.
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Old 10-26-2015, 06:06 PM
  # 190 (permalink)  
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I went to a wedding in Boston this weekend. Interesting: I abstained for the whole two days. Very unusual for me. Felt easy , though. I observed intoxication. Even helped work out driving arrangements. Was surprised at how many good people still think it's OK to drive drunk.
Felt very empowered by my decision to not drink.
On the seven hour drive back home, planned how I would continue my sobriety, but in the back of my head, figured it was going to be a contest.
My SR self lost.
But: I shall continue.
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Old 10-27-2015, 05:49 AM
  # 191 (permalink)  
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to be honest jr, my observation is that you were planning to drink...

sooner or later, if you really want to, you are going to have to draw a line in the sand and stick with a plan to stay sober.
My plan was I decided to never drink again and never change my mind. I had some battles with my brain in the beginning, but I stuck to my decision. Now, I'm not concerned in the least about "slipping" or relapse. That is no longer a part of my life.

When you ready, you will succeed.
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Old 10-27-2015, 05:09 PM
  # 192 (permalink)  
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LB: I had no plan to drink. My default mode is to drink. My plan was to navigate through a 3 day event, and try to not drink. I anticipated the hot spots, knew the coming triggers, and successfully moved through them. At one point late in the post wedding celebration, many people around me had scotch in glasses (Scottish wedding), I could smell the vapors as people passed, I could inhale the taste, and quite liked it, but there was no real temptation. Driving back home from Boston, I knew the next danger zone, have been there many times. I don't go into these moments cocky. I know that the difference between one choice and another can sometimes be as thin as a wisp of a vapor. I do not have great confidence in my will, but it often comes through for me. Sometimes not. We have learned to live together, me and my complicated will. So: I look back and feel good about a few victories. Recognize a loss. And move on. And I agree with you: when I am really ready, I'll do it. Until then, I won't know until it happens. Because I have been through many many failed resolves. So: I am hopeful. And thanks for your feedback.
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Old 10-27-2015, 06:25 PM
  # 193 (permalink)  
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My apologies. I stand corrected.
Let me rephrase that then... You had no plan to NOT drink.

Keep chugging along. You are doing great. Your default mode is to drink.
I completely understand that - it was my default mode the better part of since I can remember. Either you accept you will always have that as default mode or you may decide to make your default mode no drinking as I have.
If you want it, it's there for the taking. It is a lifetime decision - for me at least.
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Old 10-28-2015, 01:11 PM
  # 194 (permalink)  
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I definitely can identify those times I was going to drink in retrospect. There was soemthing in the back of my mind tickling at me, maybe it was just a certain mood or my conscious recognizing my subconscious drive towards booze--not to get all crappy-pop-psych on you guys.

Anyway, 2 days away from a week sober. Been to meetings Sunday, Monday and Tuesday. May go again today but the weather hear sucks so I may law low at the apt instead and watch some movies.
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Old 10-28-2015, 01:32 PM
  # 195 (permalink)  
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I'm not a meeting guy now for my own reasons.

When I first started going, I wanted to do 90 in 90. And I did + more.
We had a snow storm and I walked a mile in a foot of snow and slush to a meeting.
I really felt that making an excuse at the time was out of the question for me. What else did I have to do anyway? I walked to several meetings because of nasty weather. I put on the slosh boots, heavy coat and rain gear and made it. You would think nobody else would show up, but surprisingly people made an extra effort just in case others couldn't make it, and the room was full. In my early days I was as fully committed as I am now. As a newcomer I chaired meetings because of people unable to make it. So if you feel the need to go, nothing should hold you back. I had a thousand excuses to drink. When I wanted to stop, I had no excuses.

Congrats on almost a week AA, keep it going.
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Old 10-28-2015, 06:52 PM
  # 196 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by LBrain View Post
I'm not a meeting guy now for my own reasons.

When I first started going, I wanted to do 90 in 90. And I did + more.
We had a snow storm and I walked a mile in a foot of snow and slush to a meeting.
I really felt that making an excuse at the time was out of the question for me. What else did I have to do anyway? I walked to several meetings because of nasty weather. I put on the slosh boots, heavy coat and rain gear and made it. You would think nobody else would show up, but surprisingly people made an extra effort just in case others couldn't make it, and the room was full. In my early days I was as fully committed as I am now. As a newcomer I chaired meetings because of people unable to make it. So if you feel the need to go, nothing should hold you back. I had a thousand excuses to drink. When I wanted to stop, I had no excuses.

Congrats on almost a week AA, keep it going.
I've never don't more than 2 in a week before p. It would be nice to get to a place like you're st. Right now, the idea of being with other people who understand me on top of checking in with you guys is motivation that is really helpful. I don't even really know how the steps work but just hearing people share and reaffirming that not drinking is the choice that I need to make to survive is getting me through this. I need that momentum with where I'm at right now, so thanks for keeping this thread alive you guys.
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Old 10-28-2015, 06:53 PM
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Sorry typing on the iPad (promise I'm not drunk!! Hah)
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Old 10-29-2015, 05:58 PM
  # 198 (permalink)  
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Follow up to the Lou Reed thread: I was in awe to discover that LR's 'Perfect Day' has had over 40 million hits on YouTube. And before today, I'd never heard it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QYEC4TZsy-Y
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Old 10-29-2015, 06:03 PM
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Apropos of this group: apparently about smack.
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Old 10-29-2015, 07:34 PM
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v6uBkJSbQO0
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