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Class of August 2015 Pt 2

Old 08-10-2015, 06:51 AM
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And just for soberwolf I am adding a few things to my plan this time around.
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Old 08-10-2015, 07:46 AM
  # 102 (permalink)  
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Well I have been absent a few days. I was gone for the weekend. Lake time. It's a trigger for sure. Usually would spend the whole weekend drinking one after another. I made it through. Had a few urges but barreled on. Then yesterday brother in law had emergency brain surgery. No drinking at all.
Day 21...I feel like this is going to be a goal that's very attainable for me. I am lucky. I haven't experienced great physical pain or withdrawal. I have moments but they pass. I know I cannot have one drink. Not one. I haven't been here very long and maybe I'm in the wrong class I don't know but thank you for everyone that shares. I read them all. I get inspiration from all of you and hope I may shine a little light for someone else. I pray for everyone's safety and health to at least find peace with this thing called alcoholism.
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Old 08-10-2015, 07:58 AM
  # 103 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by DitzyDandelion View Post
I think for the moment it is just a grieving process for time wasted and people lost. I really am starting over with almost nothing. Still got a lot of regrets to let go of and a lot to forgive myself for.
I think (it's just my opinion) at some point you have to make a conscious effort to just move on. It is about forgiving (yourself most importantly), but we can't forget. You shed the old you (it's like a death/we do cry for the old you)) and the new you is like an empty canvas waiting for you to add your brush strokes. Find yourself some positive affirmations to say to yourself in the mirror every morning. It starts with loving yourself. Every time I start to think negatively (it happens a lot to me too) I have to tell myself NO. This is not happening to me again and it is not acceptable for me to keep beating myself up! I am worthy of happiness. I am worthy of love. I am worthy of a life without harshness and yelling and blaming and drinking caused a lot of this. We get used to the bad and when it's good it doesn't feel right. Well, feeling bad all the time isn't right either. Tell yourself it's ok. You are worth "good". Just my opinion. Maybe this helps. It does get easier.
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Old 08-10-2015, 08:02 AM
  # 104 (permalink)  
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reading all of the posts after missing yesterday, thankful that we are all in this with a common goal. It helps to read about how you all are planning for a better today. day 3 for me and I am concerned about this afternoon...which on a day off I would normally spend in an alcohol haze. I have got to get more involved in other people's lives I think.
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Old 08-10-2015, 08:36 AM
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Gah I made a bad joke last night. Anyway, if you fell off, glad you came back. Try to learn something from it. Have a good day everyone.
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Old 08-10-2015, 08:37 AM
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Hope everyone is having a nice day keep up the good work friends
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Old 08-10-2015, 08:50 AM
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KeyofC the grief isn't just related to drink though some is mingled. Pretty much every aspect of my life has changed in lots of other ways so that is only one aspect of the different things I am working through. I completely understand your points I just know there are a couple of things I won't get over by pretending they never happened.
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Old 08-10-2015, 09:17 AM
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Hi, All. I'd like to join this class. I relapsed last Thursday after three and a half months sober. It was horrible. I never ever want to drink again. The worst I feel when sober is nothing compared to the hell I felt when drunk/hungover. Day four for me today. We can do this together! It gets better and easier but it is a lot of work. I look forward to getting to know you all and offering support. I will not drink today because no matter how unhappy I am at my job drinking will not make the situation better. Take care everybody.
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Old 08-10-2015, 09:18 AM
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day 1 (believe me this isn't the first day 1) luckily as much as i drink i don't have withdrawal symptoms when i don't. so i'm going to be busy today. first i was going to redo/clean my bedroom top to bottom. i've had new bedding & curtains laying in the bottom of my closet probably since may. am i the only one who hasn't kept things up as should be? then i got an order for work out of county so i will go do that first. then a trip to walmart for some healthy eats. and then i will do the bedroom. and it's already 11am so that should all get me thru today.
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Old 08-10-2015, 09:21 AM
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Hello new people. I am on day 2 after having a lovely ten days in the July club then a couple of weeks of silly.
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Old 08-10-2015, 09:23 AM
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Day 10. Having dangerous thoughts last few days and it's irritating me. Thoughts like maybe I am totally overreacting. I can surely have some drinks and a wedding I'm going to next year. . Next year. That is how far ahead I'm thinking of. I'm on with not drinking now but forever is scary. Holidays without enjoying a few drinks . Do other people start thinking that far ahead or can you block it out.
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Old 08-10-2015, 09:25 AM
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The important thing is that we are all HERE. I just woke up from one of those first-days' naps....day 2 here. A little hungry today. Had no appetite yesterday. Have a good day, everyone.
Lee
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Old 08-10-2015, 09:33 AM
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Stay strong take care of you you csn do this
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Old 08-10-2015, 09:34 AM
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Thanks for the support on here ! It makes a huge difference. Went ahead and got bloodwork done just because it was time. Playing w 2 yr old today. Resting for long rest of the week. I work 4- 10hr days, at one job, and I'm actually off again on the weekend from my second job.
Kind of doing something different and mentally leaving baggage behind. Maybe it'll help.
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Old 08-10-2015, 09:34 AM
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DitzyD,
I understand. I hope things get better for you. I pray you get an ease of this feeling soon. There's plenty of support here if you need to hash things out
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Old 08-10-2015, 09:39 AM
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Hi Willow. I had those types of thoughts too before my relapse. Romantisizing drinking and thinking about future vacations where maybe I would be able to drink. Those are toxic thoughts that were made by my AV. I think it's best to shoot them down as they pop up by playing the tape through. Like, what would really happen if you had a few drinks at the wedding? Would you stop or keep going? Would you be a sloppy mess and embarrass yourself? For me I know the answer would be yes. There is no happy ending with alcohol and there never will be. Focus on today and how not drinking today will set you up for a better tomorrow. Hang in there!
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Old 08-10-2015, 09:47 AM
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Thanks Key. I already blurted most out back in the class of July thread at various different points. Adding my final bit since I came back. Though I think I came across a lot more positive last time round even though I did bore them with quite a lot of backstory. Am a little more fed up and 'seriously you stupid woman' at myself this time lol.
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Old 08-10-2015, 10:54 AM
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On regret:
Good morning all.
Regret has been a large issue for me these past months of getting sober, messing up a time or two and planning a sober future. It can plague me at times.
I'm reading a great book called "un-drunk, a skeptics guide to AA" (excellent book by the way) and I found a great line that is probably a common phrase to those in recovery: "Look back but don't stare"..... I love that and am making it part of my mental response to regret.
Happy Monday.
Jonathan
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Old 08-10-2015, 11:06 AM
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Love that Z! I am posting it in my cubicle here at work right now!
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Old 08-10-2015, 11:54 AM
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An odd thing. When I start feeling happy and engaged in stuff and social. For some reason I feel like I want a drink to make it complete and more happy. Even though I know it would just make me loose focus on whatever was engaging me and interesting me, turn into an utter bore and then make me feel really sad. And that's all before the hangover and oh my what did I do THIS time.

It seems utterly perplexing. Why want a drink to enhance feeling good when it might be nice the first glass but it will then just ruin everything about the happy moment. I never cease to marvel at the crazy knots a mind can weave for itself.

Last edited by DitzyDandelion; 08-10-2015 at 11:54 AM. Reason: typo
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