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Class of July 2015 Part 3

Old 07-17-2015, 09:39 PM
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Just wanted to stop by and say Hello. I am new here and glad to be part of the class of July 2015. Can't wait to get to know you
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Old 07-17-2015, 10:01 PM
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Day 5 for me.
You all seem to be doing well. Welcome, Kaiflyguy!
BobBFree - it was that kind of "minor domestic crisis" that tripped me up a few weeks ago. Well done you for disregarding the AV.
Daisy, your walking group sounds marvellous.
I'm going to be away for a week soon, so a complete break from routine, and some seaside walks for me.
I slept better again last night, maybe tomorrow will see me waking around 6am which is more acceptable to me than 5am!
Encouragement to you all, thanks for being here, good health to us all xxx
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Old 07-18-2015, 01:17 AM
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Well done to all of you for not caving in. I totally understand the battle of thinking I can drink just a bit. Wouldn't it be lovely.

Day 4 is dawning here.
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Old 07-18-2015, 01:54 AM
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I'm nearly at the end of day 2 here. Going to have an early night.
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Old 07-18-2015, 01:57 AM
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Good-o SansaS
D
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Old 07-18-2015, 01:58 AM
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Wishing you a good night's sleep, SansaS
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Old 07-18-2015, 02:23 AM
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Day 1 again, guys. Why do I do this? I feel so useless, so stupid. Every time :-(
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Old 07-18-2015, 02:25 AM
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Don;t spend energy beating yourself up cbf - use it to work out what went wrong and how you might do better?

Did you have a recovery plan at all?

D
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Old 07-18-2015, 02:33 AM
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Originally Posted by Dee74 View Post
Don;t spend energy beating yourself up cbf - use it to work out what went wrong and how you might do better?

Did you have a recovery plan at all?

D
Thanks Dee. No and I think that's the problem - I'm trying to get through on will power alone, and I just don't have enough of that to succeed at the moment
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Old 07-18-2015, 02:34 AM
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Sweet dreams SansaS, and hope you have a good sleep.

Welcome Kaiflyguy.

Cbf, don't worry too much. We all have our slips, and all you can do is brush yourself off, get back on the wagon, look at what happened to trigger, and try again.
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Old 07-18-2015, 02:40 AM
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I keep reminding myself if it wasn't a problem and I could just drink sensibly and take it or leave it then it would not be this hard to just not.
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Old 07-18-2015, 03:01 AM
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Yeah DD, it's definitely a rough addiction / problem to have. DaSilverSurfer actually mentioned a documentary today in this post called "Rain in my Heart".

It's available on YouTube if you want, and is quite... dramatic. It's about alcoholism in the UK. Gives some good reasons to put down the drink for good.
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Old 07-18-2015, 03:22 AM
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Originally Posted by Cbf123 View Post
Thanks Dee. No and I think that's the problem - I'm trying to get through on will power alone, and I just don't have enough of that to succeed at the moment
The trouble with willpower for me was part of my will wanted to get wasted.

This is a really good link about building a recovery plan, cbf

https://store.samhsa.gov/shin/conten...0/SMA-3720.pdf

D
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Old 07-18-2015, 03:54 AM
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Good morning all,
Welcome to anyone new.
I slept a bit better but not well. I know I am anxious and worried about today. My daughter is coming home from business trip and will want to "talk" about what happened with my drinking the other day. My husband and two sons (ages17 and 20) were ok with me yesterday. Just wanted me to move on and not drink. My daughter will want a full discussion as to "why." How could you do this?" I can never trust you again" ......it will go on and on. Explaining "one day at a time" to her will not go over well. She has not communicated with me at all since Wednesday. Not even a text about flight info....

Any advice would be helpful.?. Also, we are supposed to go to BBQ at my sons GF house. She was here on Wednesday when iwas drunk etc....mason told me to forget it and I don't need to say anything to her. Her family is lovely but they are big drinkers so maybe this was not a big deal to her??

Just feeling crappy and worried and down on myself. Thanks for listening
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Old 07-18-2015, 04:05 AM
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Hi lovehoops
try and not tie yourself in too many knots.

You've committed to being a part of this community and I assume you're working on a recovery plan.

Your daughter has a right to tell you how she feels, but not a right to hector or bully you.

Tell her you understand how she feels, you're committed to change and you're working on it never happening again.

I'm sorry I didn't quite get the whole BBQ deal - but not being around heavy drinkers is a good place for you to be today I think

D
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Old 07-18-2015, 04:11 AM
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lovehoops, would writing a letter maybe help, and have her read it before she starts on a tangent? Maybe just try to calmly and lovingly explain to her that berating you and demanding answers isn't going to help anything, and if anything, will just make things worse.

Tell her she doesn't need to fully understand. She just needs to know you acknowledge you have a problem, it's extremely difficult to quit, but you are taking all necessary steps you can to quit for good. Then give her the letter before the talk begins, with hopes she might go into it a little calmer and more open minded?

All the best though!
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Old 07-18-2015, 05:22 AM
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Morning July 2015 team and all our supporters!

Moved into day 16 today, think I'm in a good place for the weekend mentally, plan on staying the course.

Have a strong day!
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Old 07-18-2015, 05:25 AM
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Thank you for your input Troy and Dee,

Thank god my husband is extremely supportive but he is also getting sick and tired. He gets the "just for today" and lives by that. He told me he will try to help her understand as well. She sees it as extremely selfish...which it is. The letter idea is very good, Troy. Im not sure when she is coming home (bc she is not talking to me) so she may show up at any time. She flew in from FLA late last night and stayed at her BF who lives much closer to the airport. Perhaps she will not be as angry bc she has had a few days to process this....again....or perhaps that is just my wishful thinking!

I think your suggestion of explaining that I know it is a problem and I am committeed to trying to stop..again....that's all I can do ...

As far as BBQ, Dee. Maybe my explanation was confusing.I think I meant that she may not think it was a "big deal" for a mom to be drunk n a Wednesday night. Her parents drink often and maybe live like that. My son said I do not need to apologize to her...just let it go..I do have to stop by for a bit. My husband will be with me and we can leave if I feel the need to. Believe it or not, I usually am not affected at parties. I haven't drank publically in 10 years!. Its home that's the problem. I realize, though, that even being exposed to alcohol at a party can be a trigger later on!
Thank you for your input and I will keep in touch.
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Old 07-18-2015, 05:26 AM
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Originally Posted by lovehoops View Post
Any advice would be helpful.?. Also, we are supposed to go to BBQ at my sons GF house. She was here on Wednesday when iwas drunk etc....mason told me to forget it and I don't need to say anything to her. Her family is lovely but they are big drinkers so maybe this was not a big deal to her??
I think just so she knows you love her, that you are listening to her, that you acknowledge that you do have a problem, and that recovery from alcohol is seldom a straight line like putting a cast on a broken bone. I've had my share of awful things I've said and done while drunk. I don't try to hide them, nor forget about them. Also, I'm learning not to dwell on them. But I do keep them put away on the shelf where I can touch on them, a reference to learn from. I'm still working on the self-hate part for these memories but I'm not dragging them out all the time and ruminating on them.
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Old 07-18-2015, 05:54 AM
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Day 7. 1 week.

Going to treat myself to a nice big iced coffee
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