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One Year and Under Club Part 47

Old 07-25-2015, 08:55 AM
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Amp--you're in my thoughts and prayers today. Don't be afraid to put your sobriety first. Take a long walk away from the gathering if you have to. If you have a smart phone, remember SR is right there at your fingertips 24/7 as well. And, of course, as I always say--you don't have to take that first drink today no matter what. Wishing you the best, my friend.

Originally Posted by gleefan View Post
Changing the way I do things isn't easy, and doesn't always make other people happy, but I've learned that my happiness, comfort and sobriety are just as important as what other people want.
This. This. A million times this.

Thanks for your wonderful post, gleefan.
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Old 07-25-2015, 09:25 AM
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Thanks everyone for the support. I'm feeling somewhat stronger today. This particular event is very difficult to get out of. My father in law passed away 2 months ago and this weekend would have been his birthday so we have got together to remember him. It is important I am present for everybody including myself but there is a lot of emotion, stress and, of course, access to alcohol. I may well head out for a walk later to clear my head.

I have SR in my phone so am also able to keep in touch that way. Thank you all so much for the help and guidance.
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Old 07-25-2015, 09:58 AM
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I'm thinking of you, Amp!
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Old 07-25-2015, 10:44 AM
  # 124 (permalink)  
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amp, you're in my thoughts today. Taking a walk to clear your head sounds wonderful and stay close to SR. We are here for you. You're so supportive to everyone and I have always been so moved by your posts.

I'm doing good. Got through my cravings without drinking and I'm having a better morning. I will definitely check out that show on Netflix, Casey. Thank you. I'm watching an episode of Once upon a Time but I'm only half into it as I don't remember too much about the previous episodes that I watched months ago.

Thank you all so much for being here for me. I wouldn't make it without you all. Hope everyone has a great weekend!
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Old 07-25-2015, 04:16 PM
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Hello everyone,

Glee, Casey - Thank you - I had sort of mentally skipped over the concept of 'accountability' in my time here. I'm obviously accountable to myself, but signing up to a specific action in the presence of witnesses I can see is going to be a useful additional thing to practice ( and practise )

Amp and Angie - Sending beams of support your way from Africa.

I just spent 30 minutes or so composing a sort of free-form hand-wringing ' work/life finances/family between- a- rock- and- a- hard- place - what- should- I- do- for- the- best ?' type post over in my home town of Class of June 15.

By the time I had finished, I realised the clock had ticked past midnight so it is officially day 50. How about that ?

Accountability time.

So work/life can tilt 100% towards life for once. Decision made !

We are going out as a family to a beautiful place tomorrow ( today ). It will be good to mark the day

Only slight problem is it is a wine farm. Mrs F can have a glass if she wishes, in fact I will encourage here as she loves the wine there and rarely drinks at all.

I will drive and entertain the kiddies and obviously won't drink. But - you never know who you may bump into or what additional pressures may arise - so I want to state my intentions here, just to be sure.

Go well everyone

Fradley
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Old 07-25-2015, 06:48 PM
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Originally Posted by Angie247 View Post
Thank you all so much for being here for me. I wouldn't make it without you all.
Agreed Ang! I've learned so many great approaches to my challenges from other people in recovery. I'm glad you made it through your craving into a good morning.

Fradley - I found it easier to align my behavior with my core values when I stopped drinking, not to mention I found it easier to realize what my core values were. Congratulations on 50 days sober. Enjoy your time with your family! Please be careful at that winery.

Casey - We can all take your advice - to not take the first drink.

Amp - I agree that there are some events that we have to attend, simply because it's the right thing to do. In those situations I've found that having a few ideas of how to protect my sobriety helps. I may never need to use any of those ideas or I may need to use them all. It's helped me a lot.

Today I was driving home on a route that I don't take often, but that I've driven while drunk. I know drunk driving is dangerous. I know it's illegal. I know the legal fees are expensive after an arrest and the write up in the community police report is embarrassing. I know not being able to drive is inconvenient.

I drove under the influence right up til I stopped drinking 17 months ago. For the first time ever, today, I felt genuine remorse for putting other people at risk.

It didn't make me uncomfortable to feel this way. I didn't feel guilty, nervous, or threatened by my thoughts. They just seemed like the right thoughts to have, that fit the situation. It was a real breakthrough. It's amazing to me how thoughts and feelings evolve and deepen in recovery.
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Old 07-25-2015, 10:16 PM
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Just got home from work. It's after midnight, so I am officially on day number eighty. My first ever day eighty! Thanks to each and every one of you for helping to keep me sober each and every day since May 8, 2015.

Today was a good normal day. Worked around the house this morning and early afternoon and then went to my actual work that pays my bills at 3:45, just got home a few minutes ago. Good, solid night at work. Made good money. No issues. I'm grateful for my job today.

Fradley -- congrats on day 50! That's huge. Have a good day off tomorrow, and while I totally believe the wine farm won't be an issue for you, hope you'll check in afterwards anyways. Keep building those accountability muscles!

Angie -- congrats on 90 days!

Hope everyone is doing ok and checks in soon--especially would love to hear from amp!
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Old 07-26-2015, 12:15 AM
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Morning all! 9am here on Sunday morning and I'm the first up as usual. Since I got sober I don't seem able to sleep in anymore. 6 hours is the best I can manage. Still, means I make the most of the day, I suppose.

Yesterday was pretty good in the end. Friday was such a difficult day that I was expecting more of the same but I seem to have got it out of my system. Fradley is right about having plenty of strategies in place. Though I didn't need them it felt reassuring to know they were there.

I'm not a religious person but there was an optional memorial mass at 8pm for my father in law which I decided to go to. Broke things up nicely and while I am not a believer I have always liked the atmosphere of churches. I tend to get lost in my own contemplations.

So, anyway. Back on track! Just wanted to say thanks to all here for the invaluable support and also extend my congratulations to Casey (80 days) and Fradley (50 days). There is no way to overstate the importance of these landmarks.

Hope you all have a great sober Sunday!
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Old 07-26-2015, 04:26 AM
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Congratulations to Casey, Fradley, and Ang on your new sobriety counts!

Casey, how is your arm doing?

Amp, I'm glad you are getting good closure with the death of your father-in-law. Glad yesterday was much easier than Friday!

"It's amazing to me how thoughts and feelings evolve and deepen in recovery. "

How true, Glee!
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Old 07-26-2015, 05:27 AM
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Congrats to Casey, Angie and Fradley! We are really moving on those great sober days :-)

Amp, you are a good thinker.

Glee, I always appreciate your thoughtful posts.

Have a lovely day to all Undies!
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Old 07-26-2015, 07:53 AM
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Day 100! Thanks for Sober Recovery and the support everyone provides to help each other each and every day!
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Old 07-26-2015, 08:48 AM
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Thanks for the nice words everyone!

Stargazer -- welcome to the Under thread and congrats on 100 days! Can't wait to get there myself. I try not to look too far ahead in my recovery but I couldn't help but count a while back and my day 100 will actually fall on my birthday this year. I'll be much more excited about the day 100 than the birthday.

Originally Posted by Gilmer View Post
Casey, how is your arm doing?
It is still hurting sometimes, including a little bit this morning. I'd say it hurts somewhat around 33% of the time. It's not an extreme unbearable pain but it is uncomfortable and something is definitely wrong.

I probably just need to go to a doctor, but I'm not even sure what kind of doctor you go to for such a thing. Despite not taking care of my body at all for many years, I've been remarkably healthy and, thus, doctor-free for the most part.
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Old 07-26-2015, 09:00 AM
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Stargazer, welcome and congrats on 100 days!

Casey, if it were me, I'd probably see my general-purpose doc first. Trouble with an arm and/or hand is no picnic.
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Old 07-26-2015, 12:49 PM
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Hi, Stargazer!
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Old 07-26-2015, 01:26 PM
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Congrats to those reaching new milestones!

Just checkin in. Spent most of the day yesterday listening to my records and relaxing. Nothing special planned today. It's nice to just relax and do nothing for once.
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Old 07-26-2015, 03:51 PM
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I'm happy to hear you are having a break, BF!
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Old 07-26-2015, 05:32 PM
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Hello,

Checking in sober on day 51.

I have wrote and deleted this post a few times. A young man we knew, still a boy really, lost his life in the early hours on this morning, a victim of crime.

I need to look out for Mrs F. I won't drink, but I'm going to take some time out from SR. I need to get my head around this.

Keep well everyone.
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Old 07-26-2015, 06:11 PM
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Fraidley
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Old 07-26-2015, 06:16 PM
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Congrats on 100 Stargazer!

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Old 07-26-2015, 09:40 PM
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I'm sorry for your loss Fradley - prayers and best wishes for everyone who knew and loved this boy.

we'll keep your seat warm tho - we're here to help if you need us

D
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