Class of July 2015 Part 2
Member
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: UK
Posts: 927
Cbf I'm with you on day 1. I also think beer is hardly alcohol is it? Saturday night we went out and I managed to limit myself to 3 pints which meant I could socialise and appear normal but when I got home I told my husband I was having just one glass of red and taking it to bed. He stayed downstairs watching TV, I sneaked up and down twice filling my glass and another container. Woke up with a full glass on the bedside table and a box of breadsticks in my underwear drawer. I hate having to piece my life back together every day and then tearing it apart again every night.
I'm off to the Drs at lunchtime.
I'm off to the Drs at lunchtime.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2015
Posts: 44
Originally Posted by foreverfuzzy 
Cbf I'm with you on day 1. I also think beer is hardly alcohol is it? Saturday night we went out and I managed to limit myself to 3 pints which meant I could socialise and appear normal but when I got home I told my husband I was having just one glass of red and taking it to bed. He stayed downstairs watching TV, I sneaked up and down twice filling my glass and another container. Woke up with a full glass on the bedside table and a box of breadsticks in my underwear drawer.
On a bad note: justhad a coffee cause I am so tired and 2 ciggies. I wont drink.
you can do this
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 1,450
Originally Posted by foreverfuzzy
Cbf I'm with you on day 1. I also think beer is hardly alcohol is it? Saturday night we went out and I managed to limit myself to 3 pints which meant I could socialise and appear normal but when I got home I told my husband I was having just one glass of red and taking it to bed. He stayed downstairs watching TV, I sneaked up and down twice filling my glass and another container. Woke up with a full glass on the bedside table and a box of breadsticks in my underwear drawer. I hate having to piece my life back together every day and then tearing it apart again every night. I'm off to the Drs at lunchtime.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2015
Posts: 132
Originally Posted by Plath
For anyone who knows much about BPD, you may understand what I mean. It's hard not to get p*ssed off with the people who have it.
Starting day 10 clean and sober and, actually much sharper than I have been. Sometimes this is not always good because I now see warts where previously they were only slight blemishes....
Member
Join Date: Jul 2011
Posts: 1,462
I'm admitting that I'm back to day one. I usually just keep drinking, maybe until the end of the month, and just disappear from SR., possibly join the next months class for a new start after wasting more time and risking more in my life.
Unlike many of you, I am not nearly as tempted by social drinking as I am with the glamorous idea of sneaking chugs of wine in my bedroom alone. Why did I choose to drink? I became very upset over a relationship issue (betrayal to be honest) and that old voice in my head said, "oh, this is something you drink over. This feeling hurts to much to sit around feeling it sober". And that was that. So I numbed the pain and the hurt, and here I am Monday morning feeling it anyway and having to deal with it. I'm sure my daughter noticed I was drinking last night because I thought I was fine and she told me to "just go to bed". Mortifying. That was early, like 8pm, so I stopped drinking at that moment.
My relationship will end , once again , as
It has dozens of times over the past 10 years. I know what is to come. I also know that it doesn't have to be some big dramatic, end of the world scenario that turns into an excuse to drink for another month. I want to do things differently. I want to handle this like s big girl, and go about my life, taking care of myself and my girls. Stay sober, lose weight, work on myself. I know there is someone out there who is better for me. I'm 45, i don't want to be alone the rest of my life, but I know sitting around drinking alone isn't going to bring anything good either.
Thanks for reading guys. I just want to stay sober
And deal with whatever it to come with dignity and clarity.
Unlike many of you, I am not nearly as tempted by social drinking as I am with the glamorous idea of sneaking chugs of wine in my bedroom alone. Why did I choose to drink? I became very upset over a relationship issue (betrayal to be honest) and that old voice in my head said, "oh, this is something you drink over. This feeling hurts to much to sit around feeling it sober". And that was that. So I numbed the pain and the hurt, and here I am Monday morning feeling it anyway and having to deal with it. I'm sure my daughter noticed I was drinking last night because I thought I was fine and she told me to "just go to bed". Mortifying. That was early, like 8pm, so I stopped drinking at that moment.
My relationship will end , once again , as
It has dozens of times over the past 10 years. I know what is to come. I also know that it doesn't have to be some big dramatic, end of the world scenario that turns into an excuse to drink for another month. I want to do things differently. I want to handle this like s big girl, and go about my life, taking care of myself and my girls. Stay sober, lose weight, work on myself. I know there is someone out there who is better for me. I'm 45, i don't want to be alone the rest of my life, but I know sitting around drinking alone isn't going to bring anything good either.
Thanks for reading guys. I just want to stay sober
And deal with whatever it to come with dignity and clarity.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 1,450
Originally Posted by forabetterlife
I'm admitting that I'm back to day one. I usually just keep drinking, maybe until the end of the month, and just disappear from SR., possibly join the next months class for a new start after wasting more time and risking more in my life. Unlike many of you, I am not nearly as tempted by social drinking as I am with the glamorous idea of sneaking chugs of wine in my bedroom alone. Why did I choose to drink? I became very upset over a relationship issue (betrayal to be honest) and that old voice in my head said, "oh, this is something you drink over. This feeling hurts to much to sit around feeling it sober". And that was that. So I numbed the pain and the hurt, and here I am Monday morning feeling it anyway and having to deal with it. I'm sure my daughter noticed I was drinking last night because I thought I was fine and she told me to "just go to bed". Mortifying. That was early, like 8pm, so I stopped drinking at that moment. My relationship will end , once again , as It has dozens of times over the past 10 years. I know what is to come. I also know that it doesn't have to be some big dramatic, end of the world scenario that turns into an excuse to drink for another month. I want to do things differently. I want to handle this like s big girl, and go about my life, taking care of myself and my girls. Stay sober, lose weight, work on myself. I know there is someone out there who is better for me. I'm 45, i don't want to be alone the rest of my life, but I know sitting around drinking alone isn't going to bring anything good either. Thanks for reading guys. I just want to stay sober And deal with whatever it to come with dignity and clarity.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: California
Posts: 1,428
For a better life.... Good thing you are back at Day 1 and came here rather than drinking and waiting for next months class! That's a good change! I relate to secret at home hiding the bottles. Don't disappear.
Morning Day 5, my dreaded day and you can kiss it. This mornings wake up panic 4 am is worrisome due to impending work day. I dreamt there was an elephant on my chest, had to deep breath to make sure it was not a heart attack but a dream. Bad state of mind, trying not to focus on drinking later even though I know I don't want to start over.
Morning Day 5, my dreaded day and you can kiss it. This mornings wake up panic 4 am is worrisome due to impending work day. I dreamt there was an elephant on my chest, had to deep breath to make sure it was not a heart attack but a dream. Bad state of mind, trying not to focus on drinking later even though I know I don't want to start over.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2015
Posts: 152
Good morning! No internet access from late yesterday afternoon until this morning! Torture I tell you!
Day 2 for me (second try this month). I'll read more this evening after work. Do people like the phone app? I could try that during the day, although that's not a trigger time for me.
Day 2 for me (second try this month). I'll read more this evening after work. Do people like the phone app? I could try that during the day, although that's not a trigger time for me.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 3,313
Good morning class,
Day 4 and feeling more of a resolve than I have since I was pregnant and couldn't drink. I hope this feeling continues.
FABL, I have had so many Day 1's and been in many classes so I can relate. Very glad you came right back. Let this be your last class. I have realized that I need more tools and a better plan. Just not wanting to drink doesn't cut it because the further away I get from my last drink/hangover the louder my AV becomes and it just becomes an exhausting and neverending cycle. As I have read on here so many times - nothing changes if nothing changes, right? Make this your last day 1 sweetie. Don't spend the day beating yourself up - just keep moving forward and fighting. Hugs!!
Day 4 and feeling more of a resolve than I have since I was pregnant and couldn't drink. I hope this feeling continues.
FABL, I have had so many Day 1's and been in many classes so I can relate. Very glad you came right back. Let this be your last class. I have realized that I need more tools and a better plan. Just not wanting to drink doesn't cut it because the further away I get from my last drink/hangover the louder my AV becomes and it just becomes an exhausting and neverending cycle. As I have read on here so many times - nothing changes if nothing changes, right? Make this your last day 1 sweetie. Don't spend the day beating yourself up - just keep moving forward and fighting. Hugs!!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2015
Posts: 44
Today is difficult ! I am hiding at home today.
This just crossed my eye on FB :
"It's the repetition of affirmations that leads to belief. And once that belief becomes a deep conviction, things begin to happen."
-Muhammad Ali
I believe I can stay sober today, its just not easy today !!!
So hot , I really want a cool drink***
This just crossed my eye on FB :
"It's the repetition of affirmations that leads to belief. And once that belief becomes a deep conviction, things begin to happen."
-Muhammad Ali
I believe I can stay sober today, its just not easy today !!!
So hot , I really want a cool drink***
Member
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Where the buffalo roam
Posts: 370
Originally Posted by BobBFree33
Many moons ago I worked in a psychiatric hospital. Whenever admissions announced we were having a suicidal BPD (of course) we screamed! They are impossible to treat. To get attention I remember one of them crawling out of her room and literally laying in front of the doorway to the nurses station. The Dr. ORDERED US to step over her and ignore her!
I don't mean to stigmatize anyone, and I realize it's off topic, but yes...very difficult to deal with, absolutely.
I'm up hours before I normally wake up, so I'll probably check back in.
Going on Day 8.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Missouri
Posts: 515
Hi! Bebrave - I like the phone app. All u can do is read and post. I finally got on the site on my laptop the other day. Much more there! I'm in the heat (literally) of my business and basically only have time for the app. Love all the posts. Can relate so much. Worked yesterday 11.5 hours playing catch up after all the rain. Plus I did stuff at home before work! Heading out today to do it again and then I can see the clearing, getting caught up. Gonna be 97 today tho and I'm outside all day drinking LOTS of water. Lots of clothes too. Long sleeves, hat, and light workout pants. I'm ten degrees cooler.
Like the various drink options. I made a diet cherry coke with maraschino cherries and the cherry juice! Not big on diet and dyes either but once in a while can't hurt. Like the cranberry seltzer ? Idea. With lime might be good.
Love the posts as I said. Off to work.
Olivia
Like the various drink options. I made a diet cherry coke with maraschino cherries and the cherry juice! Not big on diet and dyes either but once in a while can't hurt. Like the cranberry seltzer ? Idea. With lime might be good.
Love the posts as I said. Off to work.
Olivia
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 974
Welcome, Owllie11, Applejack, SamWantsSober, Ironlady01, 60andbeyond, Ohme, and ForeverFuzzy. . This is a wonderful class!!!!
Forabetterlife keep this your day 1 and stick with us!!
I'm on day 5 and don't have much going on. Just housework and keeping the kids entertained. Maybe an AA meeting later.
BBF check in if you're around
Keep up the awesomeness everyone!!!!!!
. This is a wonderful class!!!!Forabetterlife keep this your day 1 and stick with us!!
I'm on day 5 and don't have much going on. Just housework and keeping the kids entertained. Maybe an AA meeting later.
BBF check in if you're around
Keep up the awesomeness everyone!!!!!!
Guest
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Hogwarts
Posts: 3,233
Checking in on day 6.
I had a hard time sleeping and was up at 3-4. I still feel way better than if I had beer last night.
Welcome newcomers! Make yourself at home this is a fantastic class!
Tang I am the same for the most part my hubby doesn't care at all that I drink. So no sneaking here..... that's probably not a good thing though.
He is supportive and when I say ok enough no more beer in the house he doesn't bring any home.
FBL I'm sorry you drank but so glad you are right back here. Take it easy on yourself today.
I had a hard time sleeping and was up at 3-4. I still feel way better than if I had beer last night.
Welcome newcomers! Make yourself at home this is a fantastic class!
Tang I am the same for the most part my hubby doesn't care at all that I drink. So no sneaking here..... that's probably not a good thing though.
He is supportive and when I say ok enough no more beer in the house he doesn't bring any home.
FBL I'm sorry you drank but so glad you are right back here. Take it easy on yourself today.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 3,313
Originally Posted by Sadie1
Feeling very rough, not gonna lie. This mornings panic harder to shake off. Relapsed before on Day 5 so worried, still resolved but worried. After work is a trigger so thinking of another sick day. 
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 1,303
Hi all I am on day 14 and decided over the weekend that I have got to quit the cigarettes as well. I did quit for nearly a year then dabbled on and off from March before it escalated to full blown smoking very quickly. Drinking and smoking go hand in hand for me so I need to stop both...
I am also going back to the gym tomorrow. Its going to be hard work as I haven't been for weeks but I need to start upping the recovery plan.
Hoping that everyone is doing ok... and welcome to newcomers to our July class!
I am also going back to the gym tomorrow. Its going to be hard work as I haven't been for weeks but I need to start upping the recovery plan.
Hoping that everyone is doing ok... and welcome to newcomers to our July class!
Guest
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Hogwarts
Posts: 3,233
Congrats on 14 days Martina! 
I have to quit smoking if I want a chance to quit drinking. I'm not a huge smoker normally but whenever I have decided to smoke for a little while into being sober I always end up drinking right away. Then I drink and smoke more. It's a nasty cycle. Good luck on quitting! You can do it.
I have to quit smoking if I want a chance to quit drinking. I'm not a huge smoker normally but whenever I have decided to smoke for a little while into being sober I always end up drinking right away. Then I drink and smoke more. It's a nasty cycle. Good luck on quitting! You can do it.
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