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Class of May 2015 Part 6

Old 07-08-2015, 06:44 PM
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AllieK -- I think the AVRT book is "Rational Recovery" by Jack Trimpey.

I certainly understand what you're saying on your efforts re: staying sober lessening. I have lived that constant cycle of swearing not to drink and then relapsing over and over and over again for the last 13 years. I got to where I didn't really even really believe myself that I really wanted to stop drinking, I just knew it was the "right" thing to do, the thing I should be saying.

All I can say is--I had no idea when I said "never again" for the thousandth time on May 8 of this year that things would end up being different this time. Heck, I didn't even come on here that day and admit to drinking again because I was tired of repeating that old tired lie over and over again. I posted that night about craving candy with no mention of my relapse and then posted the next morning about being on day 2. No one noticed or at least no one commented on my resetting my count. And that's because I didn't believe it either.

But something is different this time for me and it can be for you too. Go back to that old May chestnut of "finding your z". What can you do different this time that you haven't done before? My Z this time has definitely been paying attention to others here on SR.

To put it a little more simply:

Don't quit trying just before the miracle happens.

I love that saying, there's a ton of truth in it for me today and there can be for you too. You know that you and your family both will be happier with a sober you.
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Old 07-08-2015, 08:25 PM
  # 142 (permalink)  
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Allie, Google for the Rational Recovery website:

It's a busy looking page, but there's this "crash course" he has there that outlines the technique.
The book I read is: "Rational Recovery: The New Cure for Substance Addiction" (1996). I just ordered it from half.com (used) to read it again.
The one promoted on the site is more recent, called "The Art of AVRT" but from what I've heard, it's not as good as the previous one, and includes a lot of his conservative political personal views.
There's an ongoing thread that starts here:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...iscussion.html started by "Terminally Unique" who's no longer on the Forum (don't know why though). This guy really knows it well and there have been very good posts there.
It cuts to the chase regarding being committed to abstinence and being empowered in dealing with cravings. No-nonsense to be sure.
I don't agree with his harsh opposition to AA as obviously many people have benefitted very much from it, but I do like his approach.
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Old 07-08-2015, 08:57 PM
  # 143 (permalink)  
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I'm the drunk in my immediate family. My parents and siblings all drink very moderately. That makes things easy around my family in the sense that I never feel compelled to drink around family, but makes my situation more embarrassing for me. It shouldn't I guess, but it does. Even at 40, I don't want my family dissapointed in me.

Cissy and casey, I can't imagine dealing with a friends death at such a young age.

I didn't really have childhood trauma. I was raised in a pretty conservative catholic household and I didn't really discover myself until I was in my 20s and on my own, and drinking was part of it. My parents did a good job scaring me out of drinking, but once the bug bit me, I was a bad drinker. It just took me a while for it to turn into every day drinking, probably around the time my kids were born 11 years ago.

Since then I had a 1 month period sober in 2010 and abouy 3 months last September 2014. Letting myself go back to drinking was a horrible mistake. I hate how hard it is to stop.

Well, heading to bed, the end of my 3rd sober day. Goodnight all
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Old 07-08-2015, 09:00 PM
  # 144 (permalink)  
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Oh, I'll just add on a positive note, that my experience is it does get easier. Month 1 is tough. 2 and 3 get easier and you feel a lot better. I'll tell you about month 4 when I get there. ;-)
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Old 07-08-2015, 09:02 PM
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Congrats on day 3, nmd!

There aren't really any drinkers left in my family at this point. Most of them either sobered up or never drank in the first place. My sisters both drink too much but don't do it around the family as no one else really drinks. Out of respect for my dad's sobriety, I never drank around him. Well, at least not openly. So family functions and holidays around the family aren't a particular trigger for me.

Heading to bed myself. Been a nice normal day off work for me. Went to that noon meeting. It was good. Spent almost all of the rest of the day just being lazy around the house, which was my plan. Fixed some amazing chicken fajitas for dinner. Well, amazing except the jalapenos I bought were ridiculously hot. I love spicy things and jalapenos don't usually even phase me, but these must have been jalapenos on steroids because they were almost too spicy to eat once I'd grilled them. I've got a couple more left. I'll be cutting the seeds out of those before cooking with them, as that's where most of the heat is at.

Have a nice night everyone. Talk to you tomorrow!
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Old 07-09-2015, 12:35 AM
  # 146 (permalink)  
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Had spotty internet yesterday so I couldn't post much, and I haven't caught up.

Did some awesome exploring yesterday, even though it was a work day. I'm really blessed.
Day off today and I'm heading to the beach so I won't be around much. I'll check in once I'm back and try to catch up.

I think I got another job after this is over, and it's a nice long one which would be amazing. I've been trying to save so I can pay off my car and maybe someday buy my own place, but I've never had enough work to really save much. This could change that, so yay!
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Old 07-09-2015, 05:25 AM
  # 147 (permalink)  
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Day 70 just ended - everything still cool here. In less than 24 hours me and Carter (I named the motorbike Carter USM; Carter the Unstoppable Sex Machine, after a 90s Brit indie/punk band that recently did their farewell tour - kinda seemed a fitting name) are off adventuring again into the mountains.

Then next week, a nice easy week of mid-term tests.

Then a week and a half later, I'm going for another spot of ranging further afield, and a bit of river-rafting and trekking, as we get a nice 4-day weekend
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Old 07-09-2015, 05:28 AM
  # 148 (permalink)  
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Went to the beach. Had a passing thought of "Man it'd be nice to have a beer on the balcony when I get back" but it wasn't really a craving. I know how not fun it really would have been. I would have made it at the beach about an hour before I was drunk and tired, or two hours and REALLY drunk and tired, then come back and passed out around 4PM only to not sleep at all tonight because I felt like crap and then have a terrible day at work tomorrow.

Instead I'm going to read and maybe take a bath. Sounds much better if you ask me!
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Old 07-09-2015, 06:09 AM
  # 149 (permalink)  
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Congrats on 70 days, Agag!! You must be in great physical shape! Kayaking's on my to do list when it's not as wretchedly hot here.
Site, you did great--that scenario is so familiar (the drinking part), though I would have done the whole thing holed up at home. So not worth it.
Just going to the beach sounds so nice, though.
Wishing all a lovely day!
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Old 07-09-2015, 06:48 AM
  # 150 (permalink)  
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A daily meditation... ;-) (language does not meet SR guidelines if that bothers you)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=61&v=92i5m3tV5XY
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Old 07-09-2015, 07:04 AM
  # 151 (permalink)  
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Joking aside, here is a link to a deep breathing exercise posted by doggonecarl a while back that I saved:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ml#post4730197

There seems to be a number of people in the class practiced in meditation. Any links or pointers for beginners?


(and congrats on 70 days AGAG!)
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Old 07-09-2015, 07:36 AM
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Starting day 63 here. 9 weeks! The milestones keep piling up lately.

Off work again today. Only plan is to take my laundry over to my folks house after I do my daily morning perusal of SR. I don't have a washer/dryer at my place. Along with being dog-friendly, a washer/dryer connection is a must have for the next place I live.

I'll probably go to a noon meeting again but am contemplating going to an 8 pm meeting instead. Of course, I could just go crazy and go to both.

Originally Posted by site1Q84 View Post
Instead I'm going to read and maybe take a bath. Sounds much better if you ask me!
Funnily enough, baths are a HUGE trigger for me so I've had to stick to showers in sobriety this time. Oftentimes, I used to start my drinking off by pouring two glasses of wine and taking them and whatever book I was reading into a hot bath with me. Thank goodness I don't associate showers with drinking or I might be one smelly guy by now.

Awesome news on the upcoming job! Very proud of and happy for you!

AGAG -- congrats on day 70!

Just as day 90 is your next immediate goal, day 70 is mine as 69 days is the longest I've ever had sober since I started drinking. Of course, I plan on continuing on this journey after day 70 as well. My next short-term goal after that is 100 days, which also happens to be my birthday.

nmd -- that first meditation video was too funny.

KaleGrrl -- it's so good to have you back with us! You're a much-needed breath of fresh air.

If you haven't checked in lately, hope you'll do so today! Wishing everyone a safe and sober Thursday. (or Monday, as it's called in Australia)
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Old 07-09-2015, 07:44 AM
  # 153 (permalink)  
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Hi guys, just checking in on day 59. Nothing to report, another busy day and in a bit of a slump lately. Have a good one all
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Old 07-09-2015, 07:58 AM
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Ginamarie! So glad you checked in. I literally was just pulling up the members list to send you a private message saying we missed you. Now I'll just do it publicly instead--we missed you yesterday! Sorry you're feeling "in a slump". You should treat yourself to something small you've been wanting. 59 days is awesome!
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Old 07-09-2015, 08:05 AM
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Good morning! Just checking in to say hey. I am off today, and my daughter and myself will be heading over to Walmart. How exciting, I know. But its something to do.

I think I pulled something in my next, got a weird pain going up into my head. Ugh. I don't need any more head pain....

Supposed to storm later - I hope it does ..

Hope you all have a wonderful day!!
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Old 07-09-2015, 10:37 AM
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Hi, everyone. Just checking in. Looks somewhat stormy here too, Sag. Haven't checked the radar yet but it looks like more of the same spotty storm cells moving through. Curious little clusters.

(((Hugs))) to everyone on this fine day. Agag, Carter is the name of the newest member of our family and he is a special little boy. May your motorbike live up to its name. Enjoy your rides!
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Old 07-09-2015, 11:52 AM
  # 157 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Cissy View Post
Agag, Carter is the name of the newest member of our family and he is a special little boy. May your motorbike live up to its name. Enjoy your rides!
Cissy, you crack me up! Hope everyone's having a great day. Casey, thanks always for your kind words and encouragement. Glad to see people doing well in May--a very special group to be sure.
I posted in July in pt 1 when pt 2 already started -- pm'd Dee about closing it but he's probably sleeping into tomorrow (his today, our tomorrow, except for Agag's).
Anyway, I believe I have my miracle aha moment like Casey and I'm full of hope of staying sober from now on.
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Old 07-09-2015, 12:50 PM
  # 158 (permalink)  
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Hi Class!

Popping in to say hello; I will work on catching up on the thread today. A little birdie mentioned I may want to check in (thanks Casey!). Need to have this on the top of my subscribed threads so I stay close to my graduating class

Hope you all are well- 56 sober days here!
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Old 07-09-2015, 01:25 PM
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Dharma--congrats again on 56 days! I know you've stayed active on SR all this time as I see you all the time encouraging others, but still glad you checked in here. We're stronger together!
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Old 07-09-2015, 03:29 PM
  # 160 (permalink)  
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We sure are Casey!!!!
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