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Class of March 2015 Part 5

Old 06-08-2015, 08:12 PM
  # 341 (permalink)  
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I am checking in today and it is good to see so many Marchers still sober. I am nearly two months sober after my relapse. I am finally getting to the point where I am not consumed with romanticizing or thinking about alcohol. I have been busy helping my husband who put out his back and cannot sit, walk or...basically anything without help. I am glad that I am sober and can be here for him.

I also am nearly finished with a major project that I have been working on for the last 8 months or so. It feels good to have accomplished what I set out to do and just have a week or two of work remaining to tie up loose ends.

I hope everyone has a great week.
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Old 06-08-2015, 08:44 PM
  # 342 (permalink)  
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you too Pouncer

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Old 06-09-2015, 01:14 AM
  # 343 (permalink)  
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100 days !!

Hello all--

Well I made it to 100 days. I am proud of that and it has gone by quickly.

When I woke up this morning, I was afraid I might actually drink today as I had a long-awaited meeting with my boss that doesn't like me. But the meeting went a lot better than I expected. Still stressful to be around him though. I need to find a better job.....

In 100 days, to deal with cravings, I've eaten a lot of ice cream, and had other sweets. Probably not the healthiest alternative--what do you all eat/drink to deal with cravings?

The cravings haven't been as frequent lately and I don't think of alcohol quite as much.

I think my senses are getting sharper (taste, hearing, eyesight, etc..) after not drinking for this period of time and my ability to concentrate seems to have improved. But it is probably still early yet.

So those are just my self-observations after 100 days.
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Old 06-09-2015, 01:18 AM
  # 344 (permalink)  
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Welcome back Pouncer, Sisterbobby, and Mel12
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Old 06-09-2015, 01:45 AM
  # 345 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Bobcat17 View Post
So those are just my self-observations after 100 days.
Oh, I forgot--I have more money too (since it isn't being spent on beer)
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Old 06-09-2015, 05:35 AM
  # 346 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Sisterbobby View Post
Just checking in. You marchers are great. I joined the may group a few days ago. I indulged on a bottle of wine 2 weeks ago, so Im on day 11.

Divorce is in the process. Living with my daughter at the time. Oh well, I feel okay, it is what it is.

Talking to a counselor. He is in his early 80's. Spend the first few minutes analysing him. The worst thing I need now is a confused psychotherapist.

Keep marching on and i will check in every once in while.

Wow, a lot of change going on in your life Sisterbobby, go easy on yourself and good luck with your counselor. Hopefully he's still on the ball and will help you.
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Old 06-09-2015, 05:40 AM
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I went to a get together with a bunch of my old work friends that are in their 20's and 30's (and I am NOT), and saw how much they drink and how important it is to them, since I'm not around them all the time now I can see that is one of the reasons it has been easier for me to quit this time, I'm not around drinkers! Go figure! Sneaking up on a 100 days. I thought about how I used to feel after a night of drinking, anxious (awful anxiety), remorseful (even though I didn't do anything wrong, just knew I shouldn't have had all that booze), guilty, sad, shaking, dizzy. Wow so much fun I'm missing out on!! Life marches on, and so do we, Marchers!!! Let's keep marching!
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Old 06-09-2015, 05:56 AM
  # 348 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Sisterbobby View Post
Just checking in. You marchers are great. I joined the may group a few days ago. I indulged on a bottle of wine 2 weeks ago, so Im on day 11.

Divorce is in the process. Living with my daughter at the time. Oh well, I feel okay, it is what it is.

Talking to a counselor. He is in his early 80's. Spend the first few minutes analysing him. The worst thing I need now is a confused psychotherapist.

Keep marching on and i will check in every once in while.
Welcome back Sisterbobby. I'm sorry to hear that you're having such a rough go of it. Divorce is never easy or pretty. Hopefully though with some support from family and friends, and the counselor you're seeing you'll find some strength and peace. I wish you all the best in this trying time.
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Old 06-09-2015, 05:58 AM
  # 349 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Mel12 View Post
Monday blues and ughs, but determined to keep moving forward. That is all.
Mondays are always kinda blah right? I've never cared for them either. :P
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Old 06-09-2015, 06:04 AM
  # 350 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Pouncer View Post
I am checking in today and it is good to see so many Marchers still sober. I am nearly two months sober after my relapse. I am finally getting to the point where I am not consumed with romanticizing or thinking about alcohol. I have been busy helping my husband who put out his back and cannot sit, walk or...basically anything without help. I am glad that I am sober and can be here for him.

I also am nearly finished with a major project that I have been working on for the last 8 months or so. It feels good to have accomplished what I set out to do and just have a week or two of work remaining to tie up loose ends.

I hope everyone has a great week.
I'm sorry to hear that your husband isn't well. Is he expected to get back to recover or has he done some permanent damage? It's great that you're there for him. I'm sure he appreciates it more than words can say. Congrats on your project. I hope your accomplishment brings you great joy lifts your spirits.
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Old 06-09-2015, 06:09 AM
  # 351 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Bobcat17 View Post
Hello all--

Well I made it to 100 days. I am proud of that and it has gone by quickly.

When I woke up this morning, I was afraid I might actually drink today as I had a long-awaited meeting with my boss that doesn't like me. But the meeting went a lot better than I expected. Still stressful to be around him though. I need to find a better job.....

In 100 days, to deal with cravings, I've eaten a lot of ice cream, and had other sweets. Probably not the healthiest alternative--what do you all eat/drink to deal with cravings?

The cravings haven't been as frequent lately and I don't think of alcohol quite as much.

I think my senses are getting sharper (taste, hearing, eyesight, etc..) after not drinking for this period of time and my ability to concentrate seems to have improved. But it is probably still early yet.

So those are just my self-observations after 100 days.
Ya know, having had bosses I've loved and those I've loathed, I have to say that more often than not it's the latter. Unfortunately, great bosses are hard to come by. However, I've found that sometimes they change. At the very least, you can change their perception of you. Just give your job 100% and always keep a positive mindset. One day it will get better, even if that means finding a new job.

CONGRATS ON 100 DAYS!!! YOU ROCK!!!
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Old 06-09-2015, 06:14 AM
  # 352 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by secretary View Post
I went to a get together with a bunch of my old work friends that are in their 20's and 30's (and I am NOT), and saw how much they drink and how important it is to them, since I'm not around them all the time now I can see that is one of the reasons it has been easier for me to quit this time, I'm not around drinkers! Go figure! Sneaking up on a 100 days. I thought about how I used to feel after a night of drinking, anxious (awful anxiety), remorseful (even though I didn't do anything wrong, just knew I shouldn't have had all that booze), guilty, sad, shaking, dizzy. Wow so much fun I'm missing out on!! Life marches on, and so do we, Marchers!!! Let's keep marching!
Yeah. I know that feeling. I was talking to an old friend over Facebook yesterday and we were talking about getting together when I get back home. He was like "Man, we have to have a few beers together." I just told him straight up, I'm at 57 days sober so no beer for me thanks. He seemed okay with that. I suppose the true test of that will come when we're face to face and I still refuse that beer. Anyway, long story short, you're absolutely right, we are NOT missing out on anything. Congrats on closing in on those 100 days!
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Old 06-10-2015, 01:35 PM
  # 353 (permalink)  
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Is it check-in week or something? Glad to hear from other Marchers who are still doing well. Pouncer, congrats on being almost done with the project! That must have taken plenty of persistence. Sisterbobby, sad to hear you're in a rougher time now. I hope the counselor works out! Remember if it's not a good fit (aka you don't like/trust/respect/feel like you can be honest around him), you always have the right to stop and find someone else. And Bobcat, 100 days? There is nothing I can say to that but wow! Just wow. What will you spend your sober winnings on?

I am still hanging in---good days and bad. Yesterday I felt completely flattened, could hardly get up and do anything. Today I feel great and have done all of the things I was supposed to do yesterday, along with today's list... go figure. Going to get my blood tested tomorrow to see if there might be something wrong causing those weird energy-zap days. I always thought it was depression or anxiety, but---it's not. (At least, I really don't think it is---anxiety can be a sneaky little sucker sometimes.)

Which is so $#^%ing AWESOME!!!!!

I'M NOT DEPRESSED!!!

Halle-frickin'-Jesus, as my brother would say.

Which is not to say that all is well and fine and dandy, but it a strange sort of relief to have days that are low-energy, flat to the ground, empty, zonked out---and not be sad. To be tired, but not sad. To be hopeful and excited for the future.

Here's to summer, and sunshine, and progress, and hope.
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Old 06-10-2015, 04:12 PM
  # 354 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by happytobealive1 View Post
Is it check-in week or something? Glad to hear from other Marchers who are still doing well. Pouncer, congrats on being almost done with the project! That must have taken plenty of persistence. Sisterbobby, sad to hear you're in a rougher time now. I hope the counselor works out! Remember if it's not a good fit (aka you don't like/trust/respect/feel like you can be honest around him), you always have the right to stop and find someone else. And Bobcat, 100 days? There is nothing I can say to that but wow! Just wow. What will you spend your sober winnings on?

I am still hanging in---good days and bad. Yesterday I felt completely flattened, could hardly get up and do anything. Today I feel great and have done all of the things I was supposed to do yesterday, along with today's list... go figure. Going to get my blood tested tomorrow to see if there might be something wrong causing those weird energy-zap days. I always thought it was depression or anxiety, but---it's not. (At least, I really don't think it is---anxiety can be a sneaky little sucker sometimes.)

Which is so $#^%ing AWESOME!!!!!

I'M NOT DEPRESSED!!!

Halle-frickin'-Jesus, as my brother would say.

Which is not to say that all is well and fine and dandy, but it a strange sort of relief to have days that are low-energy, flat to the ground, empty, zonked out---and not be sad. To be tired, but not sad. To be hopeful and excited for the future.

Here's to summer, and sunshine, and progress, and hope.
Glad to see you around happy! It sounds like you're fairing pretty well. No depression sounds like a major improvement right? I think many of us have those low energy days. Sometimes it's purely situational, ya know? Good luck and keep Marching, you're doing great!
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Old 06-10-2015, 04:29 PM
  # 355 (permalink)  
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Good to hear from so many people

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Old 06-11-2015, 12:08 AM
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I'm still here too! Hi guys! I went through a really rough patch, just completely depressed and anxious and avoiding leaving the house or even doing anything remotely productive.
But I think most of it was just expecting too much of myself too soon, without being proud of what I actually have achieved.
I also said the long overdue *final* goodbye to my ex a few weeks ago and stopped feeling responsible for his depression and addiction, it's an enormous relief to not have that stress in my life and to not feel guilty any more.
I've also stopped feeling guilty for not seeing friends (the ones who drink constantly and only want to meet at pubs) im still in my 20s so I often feel like I should be out with people constantly and just deal with the drinking, but I've realised that's just stupid it's not even what I want - I truly love and actually far prefer just spending time with my family, studying, relaxing at home, and catching up with my few close friends at coffee shops.
It sounds so obvious but it only recently occurred to me that I don't need to do what other people my age are doing or what others think I should be doing in order to enjoy life. Even when I was drinking I hated big social situations or noisy pubs, so I might as well just accept and embrace my introverted self as I am
Life has been much easier since!!

Going to read back a bit more and see what I missed, hope you're all well!
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Old 06-11-2015, 06:09 AM
  # 357 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by immri View Post
I'm still here too! Hi guys! I went through a really rough patch, just completely depressed and anxious and avoiding leaving the house or even doing anything remotely productive.
But I think most of it was just expecting too much of myself too soon, without being proud of what I actually have achieved.
I also said the long overdue *final* goodbye to my ex a few weeks ago and stopped feeling responsible for his depression and addiction, it's an enormous relief to not have that stress in my life and to not feel guilty any more.
I've also stopped feeling guilty for not seeing friends (the ones who drink constantly and only want to meet at pubs) im still in my 20s so I often feel like I should be out with people constantly and just deal with the drinking, but I've realised that's just stupid it's not even what I want - I truly love and actually far prefer just spending time with my family, studying, relaxing at home, and catching up with my few close friends at coffee shops.
It sounds so obvious but it only recently occurred to me that I don't need to do what other people my age are doing or what others think I should be doing in order to enjoy life. Even when I was drinking I hated big social situations or noisy pubs, so I might as well just accept and embrace my introverted self as I am
Life has been much easier since!!

Going to read back a bit more and see what I missed, hope you're all well!
Long time no see immri! Good to see you back around! It seems things have been going well for you. I'm glad you finally fully separated from your ex. That was a bad situation all the way around.

I also want to congratulate you on finding some comfort in your own skin. That can be really difficult, especially when you are battling addiction. I was never one to go to the bars and clubs either. Too many people. Besides that, being around others drinking can be very trying as well and let's face it, who needs the added stress?

You're doing great! Keep Marching, one step at a time!
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Old 06-11-2015, 06:15 AM
  # 358 (permalink)  
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Just wanted to check in with you guys. Things have been going well here. I've gotten all my things shipped home and I leave tomorrow. Road trip! I'm stoked! I am on day 59 and I feel great, despite being a little under the weather and stressed. I can hold my head high and enjoy things hangover free!

Last night was a bit testy. We are staying with a friend until we leave tomorrow and last night there was alcohol floating around. It wasn't shoved in my face by any means but, just knowing it was there made me squirm inside my skin. I switched rapidly between wanting to join in, to feeling sorry for everybody there, to just not caring, it was intense and bizarre. Eventually I just gave up and snuck off to sleep. All in all, I suppose it was a success.

Hope you all are fairing well out there in this crazy world. Good luck guys. Keep on Marching.
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Old 06-11-2015, 07:07 AM
  # 359 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by immri View Post
I'm still here too! Hi guys! I went through a really rough patch, just completely depressed and anxious and avoiding leaving the house or even doing anything remotely productive.
But I think most of it was just expecting too much of myself too soon, without being proud of what I actually have achieved.
I also said the long overdue *final* goodbye to my ex a few weeks ago and stopped feeling responsible for his depression and addiction, it's an enormous relief to not have that stress in my life and to not feel guilty any more.
I've also stopped feeling guilty for not seeing friends (the ones who drink constantly and only want to meet at pubs) im still in my 20s so I often feel like I should be out with people constantly and just deal with the drinking, but I've realised that's just stupid it's not even what I want - I truly love and actually far prefer just spending time with my family, studying, relaxing at home, and catching up with my few close friends at coffee shops.
It sounds so obvious but it only recently occurred to me that I don't need to do what other people my age are doing or what others think I should be doing in order to enjoy life. Even when I was drinking I hated big social situations or noisy pubs, so I might as well just accept and embrace my introverted self as I am
Life has been much easier since!!

Going to read back a bit more and see what I missed, hope you're all well!

immri - wow lot of changes going on for you and you are still staying strong, a good example for all of us. Take care of yourself. Glad you are doing so well.
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Old 06-11-2015, 01:15 PM
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Hello everybody! Check in week, yes? It's been a long time since I've last come online. I've been thinking of and rooting for all you every day. Sounds like there have been some bumps in the road for some. I send all good energies your ways.

All ok here. Been keeping busy, writing some, and finally, finally sent off a manuscript of poetry. It'll be out in fall 2016. The sadness and depression has almost lifted -- still feel blue from time to time. No anxiety though. How good to wake up each morning and not succumb to the dread. xo!
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