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Class of October 2013 - Part 14

Old 06-04-2015, 03:31 PM
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have a great weekend guys

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Old 06-04-2015, 08:14 PM
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I am so sorry about your grandma, Cindy. I was extremely close to one of my grandmothers and losing her was very hard. I cried myself to sleep many nights after she died. I was in my 30s when she died. Sending love and hugs ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Losing your expectations is still a lesson that I am working on. I do it well with some people and with others I keep hitting my head on a rock. I guess it is a process.

My son made a summer league basketball team that kind of makes him an automatic for the high school JV basketball team where he will be a freshman this year. He is over the moon! I am very excited for him, but so much for a relaxing start to summer. ;P My husband has been travelling a lot, which is not typical, so I am feeling kind of irritable lately, but yoga helps a lot!

I have to say, Cindy, that I, being from these tropical parts of the USA, am rooting for the Bolts not the Blackhawks, but I won't be like those commercials and hold it against you or anything! LOL
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Old 06-08-2015, 09:12 AM
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DD - glad to know we won't be fighting over our teams! We're all tied up heading into game 3!

This weekend was crazy busy and it was all my stuff this time (not the kids activities)! Corporate challenge flag football tournament Saturday morning, volleyball tournament in the afternoon/evening and then softball last night. All that AND I ran 8 miles. I love the activity but that was more than enough for two days. LOL

With all the busy-ness I didn't get much time with just my kids. Hoping for some of that this afternoon. I should get out of work a little early.

I have a new sponsor (did I mention that to you all?) and she is wonderful. My old one has been catty and rude since I "broke up" with her. Spreading rumors and talking sh*t. I am trying to let it go but it is so hard when I care so much about the group I am in and don't want them thinking poorly of me. This right here is the reason I have always had more guy friends than gals. I don't need that drama!

Speaking of drama...my ex has taken me back to court to reduce his child support payments due to his income (self-employment) going down. I am all good with the courts determining what is fair based on our incomes. I really am. I was very fair and accommodating during the divorce process and he is being such a pain. Even at the reduced income he makes 3 times what I make and he is nit picking every little thing on my income. Not to mention his is all discretionary because it is self-employment. It makes me hate him so much. I don't want to feel that way about him. I don't want to feel that way about anyone! I have done some writing on this stuff and this is a new practice for me (Journaling). I like it - helps me to get my thoughts in order.

Updates on the dates: went running with the one guy yesterday and it was good. No making out after. I think I am squashing that going forward. AA Guy is around and we are good. He quit smoking (which was one of my biggest hangups about him). That makes me so happy! I mean, I have asthma - always have - and I am super active. Daily I feel the limitations from my lungs and would give anything to not have that problem. Not to mention, I am watching my grandma die from COPD. It is no way to go, my friends. That reminds me, I need to go see her today!

DD - your kiddo sounds like quite the athlete! You must be super proud! Is your oldest home from college for the summer? How is that going?

WD - a pun for you: I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me. My Royals are in a bit of a slump right now. They won yesterday but I think that is only 2 out of the last 8 games. I hope they can get it back together soon! How are you? How is the surly teen?

I hope you guys both have fantastic weeks! Update when you can. XOXO
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Old 06-08-2015, 09:16 AM
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Originally Posted by DoubleDragons View Post
I am so sorry about your grandma, Cindy. I was extremely close to one of my grandmothers and losing her was very hard. I cried myself to sleep many nights after she died. I was in my 30s when she died. Sending love and hugs
Thank you so much. That means a lot to me. I am trying to be thankful for the time we have had but it just doesn't make things any easier.
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Old 06-08-2015, 09:40 AM
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Hi all. Sorry for being out of the loop, but I was away this weekend at a baseball tournament in Tennessee. Lots of fun, but I'm worn out!

Cindy ... It's hard to let go of those that we love. When I lost my friend (about three months ago now), it was difficult. I'm just glad that the end came relatively quickly. At the very end he seemed like he was unresponsive (and it was easy to talk to others and assume he couldn't hear), but I was frequently surprised in how there would be some minor physical response when I spoke to him directly. Spend time with your Grandma and talk to her about the warm memories that you share.

You asked about my grumpy son. I'll post more about him another time. Time right now doesn't allow for a proper post!

Almost forgot to add this exciting news ... my just-turned-HS Junior-daughter, along with her HS chorus group, will be singing the National Anthem at tonight's Reds game! How cool is that?! The whole family will be there to make sure she doesn't forget any words. Go Reds!

Carry on Tobers!
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Old 06-08-2015, 10:33 AM
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WD - how awesome for your daughter! That is seriously cool! Can't wait for the update on your son LOL

And thank you for the advice about my grandma. You are right and I don't want to miss the opportunity. It is just so hard for me to start the conversations which call out her dying soon. She is very pragmatic and like I said before, is ready to go. It is just me and I am afraid to start crying in front of her. Blah - I'm crying now. I don't want to say goodbye.
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Old 06-08-2015, 03:55 PM
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Hi, guys.

WD, congrats to your daughter!! I tear up and get chills any time that I hear the national anthem. My husband and I were both military brats, so the patriotism runs deep.

Cindy, I am sorry about your old sponsor. I really have trust issues, I now realize. I am very grateful for SR because I wouldn't be able to open up enough with an AA group or even more so with a sponsor, as much as I would love to have that kind of one-on-one support. I think a huge part of me would always be wondering about ulterior motives or asking myself, "Who is this person who thinks that they should advise me??" I know that is not healthy, but it is just how I honestly think. It is a shame, because I think I would really benefit and learn from a sponsor/mentor type and there is a big part of me that wishes I had someone like that in my life, but more often than not, I turn into that person for other people. I think my codependent self feels more comfortable that way.

My youngest three children are extremely athletic. They get that from my husband's side. LOL I have been a girly, girl all of my life and physically all I really care to do is to walk or do yoga. I do get a lot of vicarious pleasure in watching my children in all of their physical talents. My eldest child played every sport under the sun, but by high school lost interest in them all. He does work out and run, but his really interests lie in music and history and food. LOL He is home this summer, but he has two jobs and a summer class, so we are still ships passing in the night.

Love you guys! Cindy, take care in your grief. We are so blessed to have wonderful, kind, unconditionally loving grandmothers, but it only makes their passing all of the worse.
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Old 06-09-2015, 09:30 AM
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When my friend died the one regret I have is that no one (to my knowledge) spoke to him about his expected passing. When we learned from the medical team that he only had days or a week tops left, his wife was emphatic that no one provide him the details. I obeyed her wish, but still don't feel right about it. I'm sure he figured everything out because, like I said before, even when he appeared "out of it" he surprised us every so often by physically responding to something that was said. Still, it feels like he (and us) were robbed of sacred time. The time to say good-bye.

The baseball game was great. It was wonderful hearing my daughter's chorus group and seeing them on the "jumbo-tron". Very cool.
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Old 06-09-2015, 04:10 PM
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It is very hard to say goodbye. My thoughts go out to you Cindy, and you too WD.

DD never forget that at SR you can be the helpee and not the helper for once

D
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Old 06-16-2015, 04:20 AM
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Hi, all. Just saying hi, nothing really new to report. Our summer has started out busier than the school year, I swear! It is amazing how much "one day at a time" works for every day calmness, not just a sobriety measure. LOL
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Old 06-16-2015, 04:55 AM
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Good morning, DD. I was thinking along similar lines last night in that, at this rate, summer will be over before I know it!

Nothing but baseball craziness in Whoville this week. Games every night. The light's at the end of the tunnel, however, as our season wraps up in two weeks.

This Saturday my wife and I will be part of a canoe/kayak float down the Ohio River. They stop all the barge traffic that morning and we get to enjoy an 8+ mile float downstream to downtown Cincinnati. Should be fun. I just hope I don't miss the take out and end up in the Gulf.

Have a blessed summer day Tobers!
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Old 06-17-2015, 05:21 AM
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Rainy day in Whoville. Can't complain too much as we've been in desperate need of rain, but with a lot of baseball yet to be played this week I'll anxiously be watching the radar.

We won our game last night and tonight the entire 14U team and parents will be going to the Reds game. Should be fun, but, again, rain is a concern. We have a great group of boys and I sure hope the game isn't rained out.

Carry on Tobers!
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Old 06-18-2015, 05:03 AM
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Hi, all. Like I was saying between camps and games, summer jobs, etc., my family's schedule feels more chaotic than ever. I made a two hour yoga retreat yesterday though, as much as I didn't want to cram another thing in my schedule, it was wonderful and much needed. I also bought new bedroom pillows for us all to sleep on. It is amazing how the little things make all of the difference. Cindy, hope things are going alright with your grandma. xo
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Old 06-18-2015, 05:41 AM
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Two hour yoga retreat? Does the two hours include the subsequent visit to the chiropractor or is that in addition?

Last night's Reds' game was great. It started raining in the top of the 6th, however, so we decided to go home early. Play resumed and, as luck would have it, the Reds won with a walk off grand slam at about 1:15 am. Wish we could have seen it, but Papa needs to go to work in the morning!

More baseball tonight ... first game in tournament against a very good team.

Cindy ... As DD mentioned, I hope things are going as well as can be expected with your Grandmother.
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Old 06-23-2015, 01:30 PM
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I think I'm the baby in our little group, but today marks 20 months for me. That stat is stunning to me. It's a long time, but not so long that I can't remember the fear of going a single day without alcohol.

Nothing special. Just one day at a time and having faith that things would get easier. They have.

Carry on.
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Old 06-23-2015, 04:30 PM
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Congratulations WhoDey

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Old 06-24-2015, 05:07 AM
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Whodey, that is awesome, congratulations!! Cindy Lou, where are you? Keep us posted, girl. I am sure you are going through a lot of emotional stuff now with your grandma. We are here for you!
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Old 06-24-2015, 05:28 AM
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Congrats Whodey
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Old 06-27-2015, 04:26 AM
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Hi, guys. I am headed to an all day yoga retreat. Love it! It is good timing because my plan is to quit my job on Monday. This is long overdue. My job has been stale and stagnant for me for a long time, but I have become very, very close to my employers, so I know this will not go down without tears all of the way around. Prayers appreciated!
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Old 06-27-2015, 05:43 AM
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best wishes for your retreat and your decision DD

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