Class of December 2014 Part 14
Member
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Canada
Posts: 129
Originally Posted by Jsbodhi 
I really wonder about those people that have 1 or 2 drinks then go home, I can't.
Well, actually I can, but then I go home and drink a bottle of wine, sometimes I wonder how many others do that too.
I didn't look like an alcoholic, I hid it.
And BBQBiker. Don't worry about my hand. Going to be stubborn and not get it looked at. I'm more concerned with where I'll stop for the night on my way home. Speaking of which, travelling from Nova Scotia to Ontario. If anyone lives between those provinces... Can stop for coffee... Also a big fan of breakfast. either or... Excited to be headed home tomorrow
Member
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Somewhere in California
Posts: 1,136
Soda water and a slice of orange picked from the tree in the yard on this day 93. Warm spring weather. Nice walk with my family in the canyon outside of town.
Dental appointment today to repair a tooth I chipped the other day. After the numbness wore off, the pain was pretty rough. In the past, that would have been reason to buy some whiskey for "medication." This time, ibuprofen worked just fine. Better, since there will be no hangovers or withdrawals. No panic attack.
Doing well without drinking these three months. Cravings have gone by this point. I've done most of the things I used to add alcohol to, and have learned to enjoy them sober- except for one thing. It's a big one. I am a songwriter/ performer and have never gotten through a live performance without alcohol. I'm fairly sure I can do it, but it will be... Different. Potentially difficult. I have something coming up down the road and will have to cross that bridge before too long.
Dental appointment today to repair a tooth I chipped the other day. After the numbness wore off, the pain was pretty rough. In the past, that would have been reason to buy some whiskey for "medication." This time, ibuprofen worked just fine. Better, since there will be no hangovers or withdrawals. No panic attack.
Doing well without drinking these three months. Cravings have gone by this point. I've done most of the things I used to add alcohol to, and have learned to enjoy them sober- except for one thing. It's a big one. I am a songwriter/ performer and have never gotten through a live performance without alcohol. I'm fairly sure I can do it, but it will be... Different. Potentially difficult. I have something coming up down the road and will have to cross that bridge before too long.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 2,308
You can do it Gnik. I bet you might feel more awkward, but overall without the shroud of alcohol yoor performance will really shine through! I bet you can perform better than you did with booze.
What do you play? What kind of music?
What do you play? What kind of music?
Member
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,837
Originally Posted by brynn
Jen...you're our class scholar!! Glad your exam was easy breezy!!
Oh middy!! I'm super glad you're sober today too!
I can honestly say that I now enjoy sober life way more than my former drinking life!!
I'm free! Yay!
Oh middy!! I'm super glad you're sober today too!
I can honestly say that I now enjoy sober life way more than my former drinking life!!
I'm free! Yay!
I grew up really really poor. I always dreamed of being a scholar, but I thought I never could be, I thought I was too poor, uneducated etc.
I still feel like everyone is going to find out that I shouldn't be in the university.
Like I'm just slinking below the radar, even though I get straight A's.
I feel I'm not good enough.
No matter what I do isn't good enough.
OX
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Upper Left USA
Posts: 630
Sorry you feel that way Jen. I'm sure there are many people who will be inspired by your story of hard work and dedication. You are successful already and just getting warmed up.
Hey Marty. Idiots out there never cease to amaze congrats on doing a good job and getting them in for the show without strangling them
Cast down, not on your way, but seattle has good breakfast spots if you get really lost.. And of course there are a few Starbucks here too.
Where's my tonks at?
Omo, check out the moon?
Hey brynn, thanks for asking about my kitty. He's another heartbreaker but still going. Not sure how happy he is though.
To all the cougars out there!!
Hey Marty. Idiots out there never cease to amaze congrats on doing a good job and getting them in for the show without strangling them
Cast down, not on your way, but seattle has good breakfast spots if you get really lost.. And of course there are a few Starbucks here too.
Where's my tonks at?
Omo, check out the moon?
Hey brynn, thanks for asking about my kitty. He's another heartbreaker but still going. Not sure how happy he is though.
To all the cougars out there!!
OX
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Upper Left USA
Posts: 630
Hey gnik, you'll probably have a better assessment of your performance the next day. I was just performing a play that I had previously performed in the throes of drinking. Never performed drunk, but always wasted afterword and partially hungover. I did feel a bit calmer about the show or at least more focused even though I was surrounded by a hsitstorm .
I would imagine it will be like most of your other activities of late where you notice it for a second and forget all about it. And congrats on 93 days.
I would imagine it will be like most of your other activities of late where you notice it for a second and forget all about it. And congrats on 93 days.
...holds the key
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Texas
Posts: 7,065
Hey y'all...it's late for me and I'm still baby sitting the cutest little guy ever! He's zonked out and I will be too before long.
Sunking....I like what kitty said...alcohol shrouds our true talents. We'll be thinking of you and sending tons of support your way...you can totally do this! If you can quit drinking, you can do anything!
Cast...I'm way down here in Texas...crud! Be safe traveling...there's no place like home.
Hugs Jen! You are an inspiration!!
Middy...really proud of you...y'all be safe tomorrow.
Big, give your kitty a kiss for me!
Sunking....I like what kitty said...alcohol shrouds our true talents. We'll be thinking of you and sending tons of support your way...you can totally do this! If you can quit drinking, you can do anything!
Cast...I'm way down here in Texas...crud! Be safe traveling...there's no place like home.
Hugs Jen! You are an inspiration!!
Middy...really proud of you...y'all be safe tomorrow.
Big, give your kitty a kiss for me!
Ya**!
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Canada! wtf eh?
Posts: 1,123
Jen, while you're admittedly a bit odd on some fronts , who isn't? I think you're awesome. You've accomplished and experienced more than most people will in their entire lives and you're still young... Never let me catch you lookin at the ground because you have every reason to stare people right in the eyes.
Biggy I'm here man. Just a pretty long day, barely got off work. Tomorrow I'll definitely set a minute out for Taco Time.
brynnie, you're adorable. Can I kiss you on the cheek? **** it, here it comes... *smooch*
Della!!! If you're a cougar, does that make me cougar bait?? Congrats on 60 my beautiful friend. I miss Copper too...
Marty, I hear ya on the inhaled food thing. Haven't eaten until a min ago and Im not even sure i tasted it.
Mama B!!! You've no idea how much I wish I was sitting at your table. Sounded amazing!
Sunking, Just lay down and boogy and play that funky music till you die...
Biggy I'm here man. Just a pretty long day, barely got off work. Tomorrow I'll definitely set a minute out for Taco Time.
brynnie, you're adorable. Can I kiss you on the cheek? **** it, here it comes... *smooch*
Della!!! If you're a cougar, does that make me cougar bait?? Congrats on 60 my beautiful friend. I miss Copper too...
Marty, I hear ya on the inhaled food thing. Haven't eaten until a min ago and Im not even sure i tasted it.
Mama B!!! You've no idea how much I wish I was sitting at your table. Sounded amazing!
Sunking, Just lay down and boogy and play that funky music till you die...
Cause no harm
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Missouri
Posts: 596
Damn, I'm going to have to come here earlier when there's people.
BBQ—how's the guitar coming? Gotta give you one pointer. Arch your hand, don't wrap your thumb around the neck. Use your thumb under the neck to arch your fingers up and away from the fretboard. That will give more clearance for the strings and you'll play more with the tips of your fingers (gotta build those callouses too) The more you play, the more you move forward. Good luck.
BBQ—how's the guitar coming? Gotta give you one pointer. Arch your hand, don't wrap your thumb around the neck. Use your thumb under the neck to arch your fingers up and away from the fretboard. That will give more clearance for the strings and you'll play more with the tips of your fingers (gotta build those callouses too) The more you play, the more you move forward. Good luck.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Northern Illinos
Posts: 1,757
Good Morning Lovely Littermates.
Day 91 for we Royal Veggie Triplets.
Della, congrats on 60.
Tonks - sound like a long day - when does the VA job start?
Middy, I hope you are in Alabama and warmer today.
Cast, I'm in northern Ilinois so a southern detour and boom - your here.
SunKing - you will do great performing sober. In fact, you will do better than ever because your confidence and esteem will be real not manufactured in a bottle.
CreekRyder - thanks for the guitar tip. That is the first time anyone has explained that where it made sense. Thanks. Right now I am building callouse and I pushed it too much yesterday and today my fingers are cracked and bleeding again. Crud. Just when I thought I had turned a corner.
Big, give your kitty a hug for us.
Jen, you can go toe to toe with anyone. Never think otherwise. I'm the first in my family to get a post graduate degree and I still had feelings of inadequacy until I realized that everyone puts one foot in front of the other, goes to the bathroom and struggles with relationships. No one is exempt. Remember that others are waiting to hear what you have to say.
Day 91 for we Royal Veggie Triplets.
Della, congrats on 60.
Tonks - sound like a long day - when does the VA job start?
Middy, I hope you are in Alabama and warmer today.
Cast, I'm in northern Ilinois so a southern detour and boom - your here.
SunKing - you will do great performing sober. In fact, you will do better than ever because your confidence and esteem will be real not manufactured in a bottle.
CreekRyder - thanks for the guitar tip. That is the first time anyone has explained that where it made sense. Thanks. Right now I am building callouse and I pushed it too much yesterday and today my fingers are cracked and bleeding again. Crud. Just when I thought I had turned a corner.
Big, give your kitty a hug for us.
Jen, you can go toe to toe with anyone. Never think otherwise. I'm the first in my family to get a post graduate degree and I still had feelings of inadequacy until I realized that everyone puts one foot in front of the other, goes to the bathroom and struggles with relationships. No one is exempt. Remember that others are waiting to hear what you have to say.
Ya**!
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Canada! wtf eh?
Posts: 1,123
B be sure to moisturize your hands, paying special attention to the tips, daily and even nightly before bed. The weather you've been having is especially hard on the skin and these repeated cracks could probably be prevented... They also sell cotton gloves you can wear at night after you moisturize to let it work while you sleep as well
Giving up is NOT an option.
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Western Wisconsin
Posts: 7,808
Good morning everyone!!
Congrats on 60 days, Della! And gnik -I keep forgetting we are on the same day. Feels great to be over 90 days! I didn't have much in the way of cravings, but being sober is normal now, and doesn't consume every waking moment like it did in he beginning.
I'm reading a new book - it's called "OK So I Quit - Now What?" It's about reinventing yourself and getting what you want out of a sober life. It's not very well written, but it has some good suggestions. I'll finish it and let y'all know if it's worth reading. We never did have our book club discussion on "Drinking: A Love Story."
Congrats on 60 days, Della! And gnik -I keep forgetting we are on the same day. Feels great to be over 90 days! I didn't have much in the way of cravings, but being sober is normal now, and doesn't consume every waking moment like it did in he beginning.
I'm reading a new book - it's called "OK So I Quit - Now What?" It's about reinventing yourself and getting what you want out of a sober life. It's not very well written, but it has some good suggestions. I'll finish it and let y'all know if it's worth reading. We never did have our book club discussion on "Drinking: A Love Story."
Giving up is NOT an option.
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Western Wisconsin
Posts: 7,808
Jen - I have had those same feelings much of my life about not feeling good enough, even while I was pulling straight A's, succeeding in the military, having a successful career, raising great kids, etc. I kept wondering when "they" were all going to figure out I was a fake. Thankfully, I'm getting better at accepting that I work hard and deserve to be successful. The evidence is all there - I just couldn't see it. I've had to make lists of accomplishments and look at them when I feel unworthy. It helps.
Giving up is NOT an option.
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Western Wisconsin
Posts: 7,808
Here's today's entry in the daily book I got - it's a good one.
March 6 “To be willing to work for humility as something to be desired for itself, takes most of us a long, long time. A whole life- time geared to self- centeredness cannot be set in reverse all at once. Rebellion dogs our every step.” Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions , 73
We are rebellion dawgs. sounds like a band! We don’t conform or listen to reason. Did our rebellious nature condemn us to addiction or did addiction warp our brains to the point of antisocial selfishness and poor decision- making? What AA could identify in the middle of the last century, science can explain this century. Addiction cuts down our neurotransmitters’ functionality. Dopamine, GABA and glutamate work harmoniously in normal brains but not in the brain of a rebellion dawg . Addiction and maybe other obsessive- compulsive disorders create an imbalance of natural chemicals, influencing behavior, mood and decision- making. In a normal brain the consequences of harmful actions are weighed against rewards. When we mess with our Brain chemistry our prefrontal cortex cannot effectively warn us of the dangers of bad habits and rash decisions. Our brains are dysfunctional. That’s right, dawg our rebellious nature may not be our nature at all. The question of which came first— chemical imbalance or addiction— is up for debate. Relapse, destructive relationships, narcissism, rash decisions about career, recovery or even what downhill ski trail we choose might not be due to the fact that we are born to be wild; our Brain chemistry might be short- circuited. Synaptic plasticity in some addicts, some of the time, restores brain functioning, keeping us apprised of right/wrong and risk/reward considerations. To re- train our thinking from grandiose to humble, from reckless to mindful, will take time and practice. Let’s not be hard on ourselves if we suffer setbacks in our sober, sensible, serene living. Steps Four through Seven are exercises in reflection, understanding and improving my cooperative, proactive and compassionate ways, where only rebellion ruled me before. Do I remember progress, not perfection, in my recovery? Teaching rebellion dogs new tricks takes time and repetition. Good doggy!
March 6 “To be willing to work for humility as something to be desired for itself, takes most of us a long, long time. A whole life- time geared to self- centeredness cannot be set in reverse all at once. Rebellion dogs our every step.” Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions , 73
We are rebellion dawgs. sounds like a band! We don’t conform or listen to reason. Did our rebellious nature condemn us to addiction or did addiction warp our brains to the point of antisocial selfishness and poor decision- making? What AA could identify in the middle of the last century, science can explain this century. Addiction cuts down our neurotransmitters’ functionality. Dopamine, GABA and glutamate work harmoniously in normal brains but not in the brain of a rebellion dawg . Addiction and maybe other obsessive- compulsive disorders create an imbalance of natural chemicals, influencing behavior, mood and decision- making. In a normal brain the consequences of harmful actions are weighed against rewards. When we mess with our Brain chemistry our prefrontal cortex cannot effectively warn us of the dangers of bad habits and rash decisions. Our brains are dysfunctional. That’s right, dawg our rebellious nature may not be our nature at all. The question of which came first— chemical imbalance or addiction— is up for debate. Relapse, destructive relationships, narcissism, rash decisions about career, recovery or even what downhill ski trail we choose might not be due to the fact that we are born to be wild; our Brain chemistry might be short- circuited. Synaptic plasticity in some addicts, some of the time, restores brain functioning, keeping us apprised of right/wrong and risk/reward considerations. To re- train our thinking from grandiose to humble, from reckless to mindful, will take time and practice. Let’s not be hard on ourselves if we suffer setbacks in our sober, sensible, serene living. Steps Four through Seven are exercises in reflection, understanding and improving my cooperative, proactive and compassionate ways, where only rebellion ruled me before. Do I remember progress, not perfection, in my recovery? Teaching rebellion dogs new tricks takes time and repetition. Good doggy!
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