Class of November 2014 Part 6
. I will stick close to my boys Member
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Pearland, Texas
Posts: 14
Good morning, everyone. Day 37!
Sounds like most are roughing it and getting it done all the same. That's extremely awesome IMO. If we can do it this time of year that tells me it'll get better. I've been praying for all of you.
And remember, in the rough times your strength not only helps you, but is a huge inspiration to others. You guys are a huge inspiration to me.
Sounds like most are roughing it and getting it done all the same. That's extremely awesome IMO. If we can do it this time of year that tells me it'll get better. I've been praying for all of you.
And remember, in the rough times your strength not only helps you, but is a huge inspiration to others. You guys are a huge inspiration to me.
Say cheese!
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Scotland
Posts: 3,379
I'm checking in but will say I won't be posting until Boxing Day that will be my day 1. Sry for letting u all down. I'm looking for a new year sober one.
Congrats on every ones achievements so fat and sry again. I will read but won't be posting until I can say my day 1.
Huggles all and merry Xmas xxx
Congrats on every ones achievements so fat and sry again. I will read but won't be posting until I can say my day 1.
Huggles all and merry Xmas xxx
not a greeter
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: padmasana
Posts: 13,927
What's going on Erratic? I understand not wanting to post until you're back where you were but I'm glad you checked in and I hope you continue. Posting before drinking is an idea, as someone mentioned above, so we can talk you out if it!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: Baltimore, MD
Posts: 124
Erratic, we'd much rather see you before Boxing Day. Think about it, okay?
He19 - can we all come to Orlando with you? : )
TEC -- you sound like you're in a much better place in terms of mindset than you were before. You have a support system and you sound much more determined to fight this. That makes me happy! You can do it.
Let's make this a great day, everyone!
He19 - can we all come to Orlando with you? : )
TEC -- you sound like you're in a much better place in terms of mindset than you were before. You have a support system and you sound much more determined to fight this. That makes me happy! You can do it.
Let's make this a great day, everyone!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: Europe
Posts: 259
I've been feeling great, but today I really felt like drinking - just to get out of myself for a while. Drinking is what I've been doing as soon as my mind starts spinning, I start worrying and feeling anxious and just want to disappear from myself.
I tried to play the tape forward, but as usual all I saw was blissful oblivion. That's usually my trigger - when I'm so tired of myself that I want to press "pause" from life - that's when I drink.
So I played the tape backwards. Quite literally. I went through my facebook updates from the past two years.
Me having a picnic in a parc with some friends. I can see that I'm smiling, but what I remember is that I downed at least three beers just to be able to drag myself there. I was sweating, suffering and was upset that all we had for five people was a bottle of wine to share. It was pure misery.
Another sunny day, me planting flowers in a garden...it's not noticable to anyone else, but I know that in the backpack in the corner of the picture, I had a bottle of vodka. I felt like I couldn't relate to anyone or anything and all I wanted to get away as soon as possible so I could go home and drink in peace.
Enthusiastic update at a 5 hour layover in Amsterdam. The truth is I'd just been dumped, was drinking not to fall apart, but of course the alcohol made me end up crying in the toilets and almost missing my flight.
Etc.
If I learned something, it's that my "pauses" in life, is indeed pauses, because I wasn't really present when those photos were taken or those updates were written. But when I press "play", I'm not where I was when I started drinking. I'm handcuffed down in the cellar I so carefully constructed for myself.
And if I didn't know already, I'd also learn that what you see on facebook bear no ressemblance whatsoever with the truth.
I still feel like I'm sinking in the mud of life - but I didn't press pause today. I didn't drink. Day 13.
I tried to play the tape forward, but as usual all I saw was blissful oblivion. That's usually my trigger - when I'm so tired of myself that I want to press "pause" from life - that's when I drink.
So I played the tape backwards. Quite literally. I went through my facebook updates from the past two years.
Me having a picnic in a parc with some friends. I can see that I'm smiling, but what I remember is that I downed at least three beers just to be able to drag myself there. I was sweating, suffering and was upset that all we had for five people was a bottle of wine to share. It was pure misery.
Another sunny day, me planting flowers in a garden...it's not noticable to anyone else, but I know that in the backpack in the corner of the picture, I had a bottle of vodka. I felt like I couldn't relate to anyone or anything and all I wanted to get away as soon as possible so I could go home and drink in peace.
Enthusiastic update at a 5 hour layover in Amsterdam. The truth is I'd just been dumped, was drinking not to fall apart, but of course the alcohol made me end up crying in the toilets and almost missing my flight.
Etc.
If I learned something, it's that my "pauses" in life, is indeed pauses, because I wasn't really present when those photos were taken or those updates were written. But when I press "play", I'm not where I was when I started drinking. I'm handcuffed down in the cellar I so carefully constructed for myself.
And if I didn't know already, I'd also learn that what you see on facebook bear no ressemblance whatsoever with the truth.
I still feel like I'm sinking in the mud of life - but I didn't press pause today. I didn't drink. Day 13.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Pearland, Texas
Posts: 14
congratulations on day 13 Dallow. It gets better.
I went through that too. Just felt down and like garbage. Try to remember the days before you started drinking and focus on getting back to that. That's what helped me through that time.
I went through that too. Just felt down and like garbage. Try to remember the days before you started drinking and focus on getting back to that. That's what helped me through that time.
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Location: US East Coast
Posts: 1,972
Originally Posted by Dallow 
I've been feeling great, but today I really felt like drinking - just to get out of myself for a while. Drinking is what I've been doing as soon as my mind starts spinning, I start worrying and feeling anxious and just want to disappear from myself.
I tried to play the tape forward, but as usual all I saw was blissful oblivion. That's usually my trigger - when I'm so tired of myself that I want to press "pause" from life - that's when I drink.
I tried to play the tape forward, but as usual all I saw was blissful oblivion. That's usually my trigger - when I'm so tired of myself that I want to press "pause" from life - that's when I drink.
Administrator
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,313
I really hope you change your mind and decide to stay sober throught and keep posting erratic.
you deserve better than what you're thinking about giving yourself this Xmas.
Sorry for anyone struggling tody - the good thing is bad days only last a day now - not weeks like they did when we were drinking
stay strong everyone
D
you deserve better than what you're thinking about giving yourself this Xmas.
Sorry for anyone struggling tody - the good thing is bad days only last a day now - not weeks like they did when we were drinking
stay strong everyone
D
Guest
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 943
Awful tragedy in Glasgow today and all of Scotland reeling from it
: a refuse lorry lost control and plowed into pedestrians in Glasgow city centre, six people killed and more injured everyone here just devastated. My thoughts are with all the people involved.
: a refuse lorry lost control and plowed into pedestrians in Glasgow city centre, six people killed and more injured everyone here just devastated. My thoughts are with all the people involved.
Member
Join Date: May 2014
Location: AUD
Posts: 359
Guys I need your support to make it through a 48hr detox before Christmas. I drank way to much last night. Not feeling to bad to day luckily but I need a break.
Ive already had 5 days off in December. Time to do another couple days.
Ive already had 5 days off in December. Time to do another couple days.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Orange County, CA
Posts: 82
ubn, TEC, awayshope, everyone! I feel your struggles! Anxiety is a major part of this. We talk about riding the urge wave or urge surfing but I feel like it's anxiety surfing. Has anyone taken zoloft? Does it help? Dee maybe you know? Thanks.... xoxox
Administrator
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,313
I haven't taken Zoloft 11 stars.
My experience with anti depressants is limited to Prozac and Endep which I currently use for nerve pain.
I've had some success with belly breathing and other breathing techniques for anxiety tho
Breathing Exercises
It's hard to get into them when you're anxious and the chest is tight but the more you practice them the easier it gets
D
My experience with anti depressants is limited to Prozac and Endep which I currently use for nerve pain.
I've had some success with belly breathing and other breathing techniques for anxiety tho
Breathing Exercises
It's hard to get into them when you're anxious and the chest is tight but the more you practice them the easier it gets
D
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