HeadLump

So pleased you're feeling better, Fixy. I hope you have a very healing weekend

EyesOfAStranger

Hi all....hope everyone is well

I'm still here, still chugging along - but really struggling. So unhappy - really have been thinking a lot lately about going back to the pills. Doing a lot of reading right now as opposed to writing - trying to remind myself of the misery that comes with addiction through other's stories. Because in my head it seems preferable - but I know that is not true. Ugh - I messed up my dopamine receptors something fierce all these years!

(((Lumpy))) I was sorry to read you were struggling as well - hoping you're feeling a bit better now. You are such a rock star, the first to offer words of encouragement and support. I hope you are focusing some of that on yourself at the moment

Kahlia - I have to agree with the beautiful story Ms. Lump told. I also had a bad relationship, and I also was chasing the original high even though I knew in my heart that things were not right. It's so hard though, I get that. I hope things are going well for you.

MrF - you sound like you are doing great. It made me smile to see a post about butts from you

petals - thinking of you Congrats on four months - that's fantastic! I have to ask though....as I'm not sure what this means.....I've tried to figure it out, but just can't....

Over here undies = underwear! And all I can think of is you writing your sober time there, kind of like the day of the week underwear - haha! I know that can't be what you mean, but I honestly can't figure it out - and it made me chuckle, I hope it does you as well!

So needed to stop and see my Julyers. I promise if I really think about caving I will come here first. It's just....even though the "happiness" isn't real it would be so welcomed right now. On top of he normal misery I also have my catscan coming up in a couple of weeks, and I think that's been weighing on my mind as well. Just wondering if they will find something. Excuses, excuses

OK, back to reading - but wanted to say hi to all!

PS - Congrats on the 100,000 Dee! That's a lot of pearls of wisdom there!

Dee74

Thanks Eyes

D

HeadLump

Lovely to hear from you, Eyes, but so sorry that you're struggling. You are showing incredible determination, though, and I am SO proud of you! I'll be sending up prayers that all goes well with your catscan. Surely you have already had more than your fair share of challenges and it's time for some calm waters. I do hope so

The strength and courage that you and Fixy and petals and kahlia are showing is really humbling. I'm facing nothing like the challenges you are - in fact, I feel truly blessed - but I've been struggling to get back on track with no bingeing. It's one hell of a habit to break. I'm on day 3 again at the moment and feel strong today having given my AV a withering lecture at the bread counter in Sainsburys and also turned down the offer of a cream tea!

Hope everyone is having a successful weekend xxx

petals

Thanks guys for being here. I got through last night. ...we had a humdinger of a row on the way. ...but I was determined to have fun and to do it sober! Xxx

Youngaddictionwarrior

Stay Strong!!! don't let them take the toe :-) it will be fine. Bernie went to his cousins 21st last night and slept at his parents. I went out and had a few drinks turned red due to antabuse and regretting it but I smiled and had fun that takes a lot. this looking for a house to rent is driving me insane!!! Bernie is making me feel sick leaving a puppy in a laundry at 8 weeks old so he can drink. its making me dislike him as a human being which is probably a good thing. im staying as strong as I can hope everyone else is ok & the charity event worked out. please pray I find a house so I can start fresh xxx

petals

I know what you mean by'undies'.... but I think it means under a year......
It is winter here and one needs to keep ones undies well and truly covered! !!! Hugs to all juliers. And all sr. Xx

MrFixit63

I cannot talk very long I'm on heavy pain killers. I hope you all are doing good have a great holiday. My little piggy is not going home.

petals

Aw mrf you take care. .send

petals

Sending hugs to you from me. Xxx

HeadLump

Oh, Fixy. I am so, so sorry

MrFixit63

Hey don't feel sorry for me I done it to myself. I have nobody to blame but me

MrFixit63

I've been wanting to lose weight but not that way

Dee74

I'm sorry Mr F...but I actually lost most of one big toe due to some medical incompetence...30 years ago now and it doesn't bother me none...

I'm sure you'll adapt just fine

D

MrFixit63

Thank you Dee I know that what happened to me was not as bad as things that has happened to other people but it's a big chunk to swallow I appreciate everything you do for all of us. My brother has been severely disabled legally by cerebral palsy his whole life . But he wasn't disabled in his mind hardest worker you ever met but I can't wrap my mind around it me and him talked for a couple hours today. But I'm still sad I know it'll be better tomorrow.

Dee74

I wasn't downplaying it Mr F - it's never a good thing to lose a bit of you...especially if you feel responsible.

Hope you do feel less blue tomorrow

My toe wasn't really related to Cerebral Palsy - just an ingrown toenail that went really bad and infected.

My GP said it was fine but the second opinion Dr got me into hospital right away.

D

MrFixit63

Dee I know you weren't down playing it. I have not been drinking but I'm on some really good pain stuff but I I know me and it's going to be rough patch

Youngaddictionwarrior

oh fixy I hope you are ok. im sorry Dee speaking of d's ive met a cop. believe it or not its the one who woke me in the randoms house around September he has realised im really funny and a great girl. I told him im not drinking. he is a gym buff and a worker like me ive got butterflies again and haven't felt this way in 2 and a half years my god ive been missing out. he makes me feel drunk lol how is everyone else going? I feel so special a senior contstable thinks im amazing :-) sober that is lol

Dee74

LOL you'll never mistake me for that other kind of D kahlia
Glad things are looking up

D

MrFixit63

Great Kahlia have you got to use his handcuffs yet ;-)