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Class of August 2014 Part 12

Old 11-18-2014, 10:16 AM
  # 481 (permalink)  
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I don't drink. Love it!

Chris, sounds awesome, well done!

Rah, congrats and loved your post about the mental to torture and time that takes. Spent many times beating myself up with my office door closed...
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Old 11-18-2014, 10:46 AM
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"I don't drink." It do feel good to say it!

Congrats Chris. I ain't sayin you got problems but I can't help but sing "99 problems but drinkin ain't one."

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Old 11-18-2014, 11:33 AM
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Hi everyone,

I was outside with my dog at 4:00, debated whether to go back to bed, and decided to. I did not wake until 7:00 and had to scramble to make it to the class at the Y. I met family for lunch - - bad accident so the main Cape highway was a mess, so I took all back roads.....frustration and impatience+ + +

1Step, you had such a problem last time, you might want to see your doctor or go to the ER before you quit this time. Best of luck to you.

Ultra, if I were you, I would stay overnight. I always err on the side of caution.

Chris, 99 !! We are really getting there.

I am going shopping, one of my favorite pasttimes.

I hope everyone is having a safe, sober day.
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Old 11-18-2014, 12:53 PM
  # 484 (permalink)  
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1 step glad you checked in, don't give up honey x
Hobbers and Chris. ....100 guys! Wow! That is absolutely fantastic guys, so very proud! Xx
Penkins well done on your evening
Scooter hope you feel better soon.
Tx keep going!
Grateful, good to hear from you, you have so much on your plate you are doing amazingly!

Just had tennis coaching and pulled my shoulder on a serve. Very peed off, a day in agony.
Hope everyone is ok. Will write more tomorrow, am pooped and off to bed.

Night all, much love
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Old 11-18-2014, 01:22 PM
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Originally Posted by ScooterBoo View Post
Hi everyone,

I was outside with my dog at 4:00, debated whether to go back to bed, and decided to. I did not wake until 7:00 and had to scramble to make it to the class at the Y. I met family for lunch - - bad accident so the main Cape highway was a mess, so I took all back roads.....frustration and impatience+ + +

1Step, you had such a problem last time, you might want to see your doctor or go to the ER before you quit this time. Best of luck to you.

Ultra, if I were you, I would stay overnight. I always err on the side of caution.

Chris, 99 !! We are really getting there.

I am going shopping, one of my favorite pasttimes.

I hope everyone is having a safe, sober day.
I hear you Scooter, and thanks for looking out for me!

I'm sometimes blissfully naive.

Announce to my family spur of the moment, on the onset of a major health crisis, that I was going to quit drinking- why not?

Run 4 miles in the trails after a really long layoff- to test out my new pacemaker (and end up tripping and falling directly on it?)- ok!

How about running 17 miles in the trails, in the rain, when the furthest I'd gone was 10 (and I'd cancled a 1/2 marathon b/c I didn't think I'd be ready for it on that date)- Check!

Someone once said 'jump and the net will appear'. Here's hoping that my net remains strong!
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Old 11-18-2014, 02:38 PM
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Evening guys and girls

I had dinner with a friend. It was good. Starting to connect back into life. I like it (baby steps)

1step - I am glad you checked in. Don't give up mate.

I am tired too tonight so early to bed. I have eaten a lot! But gym pass starts later this week so what the heck. Lol.
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Old 11-18-2014, 03:03 PM
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Hobbers - well done on the 100. Great achievement. I got to 2 months and thought I still feel crap so started again. Now I'm in a deeper hole.

No matter how bad you feel, alcohol will only make you feel worse.
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Old 11-18-2014, 05:11 PM
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Day 8. AV is talking to me. I wish it would shut up.
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Old 11-18-2014, 05:48 PM
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Ride it out Penkins. Eye on the prize.

Chris and Hobbers, top drawer!! This seems to be catching on with me. Said it a few times today London!

Start thinking of thanksgiving and your plan of attack team. We will need each other. Start to picture how you want to feel coming home after the holiday. Proud with sober flag flying high, that's how!

Visualize.

No thanks, I don't drink.

You got an issue with that? Bring it!
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Old 11-18-2014, 06:35 PM
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I heard it a lot. You're never a secret drinker; people always know.

I am a secret drinker and live with parents. Apart from the few people I confided in (sibling, cousins) I thought the important people, i.e. parents never knew. I'm pretty sure they do know now. But it's a huge taboo in our culture, so nothing has been said. It's the elephant in the room. I can see measures taken to stop me from getting alcohol, but it is passed off as something else.

I can never admit it. And they would never be able to accept it.

Why am I telling strangers on the internet this stuff. Maybe because I'm drunk?
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Old 11-18-2014, 07:02 PM
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Originally Posted by penkins View Post
Day 8. AV is talking to me. I wish it would shut up.
Sometimes I feel like I have a little devil on one shoulder and a little angel on the other. I know it sounds corny but sometimes I get those thoughts that tell me it's okay to have a drink, or hey, don't you want to fit in, or have just one. I guess that's my AV talking. The other thoughts that lean towards not drinking don't seem to be as strong or convincing.
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Old 11-18-2014, 07:13 PM
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I found this on the internet from a blog entitled, "Recovery Princess…." when googling 90 days sober. It is from a woman named Madison and was first posted in 2010. I found many of these to be right on and inspiring…sorry this is so long but maybe others will find it helpful, as I did.

"Here is just some of what I have learned in the first 90 days of sobriety….

1. Life is not unbearable without alcohol

2. Life is fun without alcohol

3. Finding out how to live again is sometimes hard but overall a pretty amazing journey – Each day of sobriety, you learn something new about the person you really are.

4. Your real friends will still be your friends when you stop drinking

5. Your personality will change quite dramatically and you will become more like your true self again

6. You start to remember who you were a long time ago before the alcohol gave you another personality.

7. You start to really feel your emotions again.

8. Your imagination becomes very active an 8 year olds after a certain period of time

9. There are some tough facts about who you were and what you did when drinking that you need to embrace and learn from in order to move forward

10. There will be tears, regret, hurt, fear, shame, embarrassment but none of these will matter that much when you start to have some of the really good days after a period of sobriety.

11. You will feel good about yourself

12. You will meet new people

13. You will learn new things and your lifestyle will change

14. The path ahead will look inviting when you work towards getting the life that you want

15. The cravings do go away but they also come back at times with less intensity

16. You will save a lot of money

17. Time becomes more precious

18. People become more important

19. Your will become more sensitive to the needs of others and you will move away from a selfish frame of mind

20. Life can become very normal again and you might find yourself wondering if you really had a problem with alcohol in the past. You did and you must not ever let yourself forget it.

21. You must constantly re-evaluate your progress

22. Goals help to provide the pathway to a new life

23. Books are a great way to escape and to occupy all the time you now have on your hands

24. Exercise is essential to your frame of mind

25. You will miss the relationship that you had with alcohol

26. The future holds endless possibilities

27. There is no turning back now, to have just one drink will absolutely mean the end to your chance at living a meaningful life.

28. You spend a lot of time in reflection

29. You stop counting your length of sobriety in days and start counting in weeks, and then if you are really lucky, you just stop counting…

30. That it is okay to say ‘No’, especially when it comes to invitations to parties and events that you may not be ready for just yet.

31. You rediscover your independence. One of the things that gets overlooked when you are an active alcoholic is that you rely on others more. You need them to drive you, you need them to be your drinking buddy when you don’t want to drink alone, you need them to help you because you are too busy trying to find the time to drink, this list could go on and on. When you stop drinking, you become more independent by the day simply because you learn to do things by yourself again.

32. Your family and close friends can start to relax and focus on their own lives again. What alcoholics do not realize, or when they do they ignore it. Is that whilst you are actively pursuing your addiction you are causing an enormous amount of strain to those who are closest to you. If those that are closest to you are also active alcoholics then by embracing a life of sobriety you may help them to realize they need help too.

33. The events that you go to actually turn out to be much better than when you think they will now that alcohol is not on the menu.

34. Writing is an effective way of expressing how you really feel. There will be many times in recovery when what you are feeling is not easy to communicate to others, this can be very frustrating and writing is a good way to help you overcome this.

35. You start planning for the future instead of just living in the now.

36. Quotes and affirmations help keep you on track and help lift your mood

37. That hangovers were such a waste of time. I liken them to being sick now. I hate the thought of getting sick because it impairs my ability to do things to my full capacity. I used to have a hangover at least 3 times a week and looking back now I see just how much time I wasted getting over them.

38. There will be times when you tend to forget the misery that alcohol caused you and remember the good times only. This is a classic case of the tendency to need or want to hold onto an idea as opposed to face the reality.

39. The odds of staying sober are against you. Even in AA, the chances of staying sober without relapsing are extremely low. It is important to be aware of this and hopefully it will help you with determination to beat the odds. Most people hate to fail so this could work in their favor or it could act as an excuse for those who are not really serious about sobriety.

40. You may be in denial about being an alcoholic.

41. Just one drink now and again is not okay.

42. Having a Zero Tolerance towards alcohol and yourself is a must.

43. You need to work on having a positive attitude every day

44. Staying sober is your main priority but creating a new lifestyle is equally important

45. You need to know what tempts you to drink, undertand the reasons why you drink this will be what stops you from picking up the first drink.

46. Get organized. Clean, organize cupboards, get rid of old junk, clear out what you don’t need. Mess is chaos to the mind. It helps you to feel more in control when your house or room is in some kind of order.

47. Take care of yourself. Get your hair styled, buy a new outfit, spend time at a spa, do as much as you can to pamper yourself to help you feel good about yourself.

48. Remember that the first time doing something without alcohol is the hardest but it does get easier from then on.

49. In the beginning, each day there will be something new for you to cope with without using alcohol. Prepare yourself by knowing this and staying aware of your reactions to different situations.

50. Have a good excuse for leaving an event. There may be times when you just need to get out of somewhere because it is too much to deal with without drinking in early sobriety. Think up a good excuse that you can use for if you need to leave. This will help you to feel more in control and less likely to cause anxiety.

51. Research different methods of sobriety, AA, holistic, treatment centers etc. Take what works from each that you learn about and use it to suit your lifestyle.

52. That having a gratitude list helps

53. You may need medical help or therapy to stay sober

54. Remind yourself constantly that you may not feel as great as you want to every day but every day that you stay sober you are making steady progress towards the life you want to live.

55. Praying helps even if you are not a devout believer

56. You may cry a lot

57. You will wonder if you will ever have as much fun sober as you did drunk for a very long time, as long as it takes to experience some real fun.

58. That many people you know have an alcohol problem but most of the time everyone ignores it unless they do really dramatic things when drunk.

59. Keeping a journal is a great way to chart your progress. It could serve as the foundation for a book that you might have decided to write.

60. Some days you may feel so awful, it reminds you of why you used to drink. You will overcome these days and feel stronger for doing so without using alcohol.

61. You can really start to see that by eliminating alcohol, so do you get rid of many of your other problems.

62. It is possible to quit drinking without going to AA. – Many years ago when I attempted to give up drinking, I went to AA because I didn’t know where else to turn. I realized back then that if I wanted to stop drinking for good I was going to have to find another way because AA just was not for me. What is for me is determination, a vision of a better life, the use of a journal, life list and a support system within the friends and family that I have.

63. The ability to think clearly and argue less.

64. That living life in a drunken haze is to not live in reality. Most people drink to escape reality and they often do, but they also create a new reality that is far more harmful to themselves than if they were to face up to real life. Drinking creates far more problems in ones life than living sober.

65. There is far less drama in a sober life.

66. You learn to regain self respect and confidence.

67. No amount of drinking will change the way you feel about yourself, nor will it make you happier, nor will it make you more fun, good looking. The negative effects of alcohol will always out win the good for an alcoholic.

68. I am more interested in how the mind works and the reasons why people use alcohol and become alcoholics.

69. You can spot an alcoholic very easily

70. You will never know how much better your life could be if you don’t take the first step and commit to sobriety

71. There is a process in sobriety, without a doubt getting through the first day, week, and month is the hardest, then the process changes to dealing with all the memories, and reliving everything.

72. That it is better to give up alcohol on your own accord than being ordered to by a doctor.

73. You only have one life and you owe it to yourself to give yourself a chance to be truly happy.

74. Sobriety may be unattainable unless you make some big changes in your life. If you are able to make minimal changes to your current lifestyle then that is great. But the chances are that if you are reading this then you need to make some important lifestyle changes otherwise quitting drinking will be unsuccessful.

75. Reasons for drinking can depend a lot on your age and lifestyle, when you are younger you tend to drink more because of the social aspect, this is also another reason why it is so hard to quit because you may not be able to give up alcohol as comfortably as if you are married, settled etc.

76. Socialization is one of the many reasons that people drink.

77. Life is a journey

78. It is important to have a support system around you, close friends, family or a group where you can openly discuss how you feel and what you are experiencing in sobriety.

79. Bad days can really sap your energy but you can get past them without drinking.

80. There will be days when you feel so good it is almost unbelievable. On these days, grab a pen and write down how good you feel as well as a list of everything that you are proud of yourself about. Tuck it away and get it out on next day that you don’t feel so good and could do with some tender loving care.

81. It is a good idea to spend a little bit of time researching anything that you enjoy doing, just to see if you could take it further. If you like writing; experiment by setting a goal to write every day for a week or exercise, train for a mini marathon, or art, sign up for a class.

82. In 90 days I have learned more about myself than in the last 10 years.

83. I don’t feel like I am missing out on alcohol anymore, I feel lucky to be this aware of how badly it was affecting me.

84. That usually, there are underlying problems associated with alcoholism, I don’t think you become an alcoholic just because you like the taste and love how it makes you feel.

85. That you shouldn’t really need to alter your everyday mood.

86. That if you have children, you owe it to them to stop drinking.

87. Alcohol ruins lives

88. I still fear many things but instead of covering them over by drinking, I am learning to deal with them and face them and thus move forward.
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Old 11-18-2014, 07:23 PM
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Originally Posted by CaptainWhip View Post
I heard it a lot. You're never a secret drinker; people always know. I am a secret drinker and live with parents. Apart from the few people I confided in (sibling, cousins) I thought the important people, i.e. parents never knew. I'm pretty sure they do know now. But it's a huge taboo in our culture, so nothing has been said. It's the elephant in the room. I can see measures taken to stop me from getting alcohol, but it is passed off as something else. I can never admit it. And they would never be able to accept it. Why am I telling strangers on the internet this stuff. Maybe because I'm drunk?
Hey cap. Just a thought. But maybe you feel safe enough with us to be honest with yourself. ???
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Old 11-18-2014, 07:24 PM
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Rah. You sure nailed that! Happily tonight I rode it out. Im nervous about the upcoming holiday though

Nice list Cleareyes!
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Old 11-18-2014, 07:56 PM
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Cap for 10 years I was an absolute secret drinker...then I couldn;t control iot anymore and everyone knew. I ended up the neighbourhood bum.

The sooner you resolve to deal with this, 100% and two handed, the better it will be for you.

Time for a new thread guys:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ml#post5026494
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