Croissant

Yes, I didn't mention it in the beginning, just to kind of protect their privacy, i suppose. They are all grown up now. I had them very young, but enjoyed every minute and so glad my drinking didn't really take off til they'd nearly left or had left home.

Ladybug2

Aww, that's great Croissant! Boys, girls?

Woke up really early this morning and couldn't get back to sleep. Ugh, so I will probably be tired tonight for our "date night". I already have trouble staying up past 9 as it is. No chance of a nap either

Hope everyone is having a nice weekend!

Leshar

Hello Everyone,

Dee, I'm happy that you are getting settled. It is nice to see you posting again.
NCG, I'm happy to see a post from you too, and to hear that you're doing well, your arthritis problem notwithstanding. I do hope that your procedure goes well. I'm so happy to learn that your boyfriend is doing well, that's great!

Bob, I know it a time of uncertainty for you, I can't imagine what you're going through. I wish you well as you finally close your premises.

I'm not in a good place, I'm disappointed to say. Over the last few days, I've been binge eating, just like I used to drink. I haven't binge eaten like this since February of this year. I woke up this morning feeling just as bad as when I used to drink. It's shameful and icky and horrible. I think I need to use what I've learned about sobriety and apply it to disordered eating. I used to compulsively eat (not purge in any way) when I was first at University. Even though I began drinking at Uni, it was binge eating that was my "go-to" "pain reliever".
I'm once again caught up in fear of the future/ageing/ill health/loneliness. The loneliness I find crushing.
I caught a bit of a "rush" with performing and especially with the good feedback, but that isn't sustainable. What is wrong with me? I have so much to be grateful for, yet I dwell on the negative and am miserable. Can miserableness become addictive in its own way, I wonder? I truly need to work on that. I'm still going to AA meetings but am struggling with finding a "Higher Power" and many others' talk of "God".
I guess I'm just writing here because I don't know what to do with myself. I have microseconds of feeling ok, then I feel a huge weight on my chest, and I get almost panicky thinking about what the future holds, and if I'll ever find some peace.
I'm sleeping way too much too. It's a way of "escaping", I know it's really bad too.

resolute50

Hello everybody.
Welcome back NCG, so glad your BF is doing good.
We went to a drive in movie last night. Took my daughter and her friend to see Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and Guardians of the Galaxy. It was a cool crisp fall kind of night.
Was nice to get away from the stress for a while.

Dee74

I wish I had some suggestions Leshar, but apart from seeing your Dr or therapist, I dunno...

I'm sending you best wishes tho - I really hope you can find a way to increase those microseconds until they become your default.

good to see you NCG You too Bob and Crois and LadyBug

D

resolute50

Glad you're back, Dee.

Dee74

Thanks Bob- good to be back

D

resolute50

Just checked the sober clock for the heck of it and it's 400 days today.

SnoozyQ

DEE'S BACK , DEE'S BACK , DEE'S BACK )



DEEEEEE XX







.

Dee74

LOL thanks Snooz

D

Croissant

Haahahaha....and look who's talking! Lol.

SnoozyQ

Lol :-) hiya Crois , how are you feeling honey , after the whole 30 are you jumping out of your skin ?

Croissant

Yeah, all good. Hope you are OK, Snooz.

Soberwolf

I'm going to be 14 months in 14 days

And I haven't told no one this but I stopped biting my fingernails for the first time in my life around 2 months ago I have always felt disgusting for this but now im like wolverine

Feels really good to not have to hide my hands anymore

Feels really amazing the lil things

Dee74

Congrats on 14 months SW

Never had the fingernails issue, but well done on that too

D

resolute50

They had a story on this artist today on The morning show.
I've always loved this song. And found it with some nice visuals on youtube.
Hope you all enjoy it my friends, very relaxing.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0FhX6ppOK0U

resolute50

Tomorrow is Labor Day, quite ironic as my labor/job has ended and I'll be signing up for unemployment Tuesday.
It's strange,I'll have moments of "I don't give a ****" and no biggie.
And other times I have bouts of depression about the whole thing.
Ironically I've always joked about being the last person to shut the lights out.
And oddly enough, this very thing happened Friday.
I walked through empty offices and shut the lights off as I exited the building.

Stupid AV has been nagging me occasionally, but I'm pretty strong in my sobriety.
I've been keeping incredibly busy, more so then before.
I hope to take my family camping and then a day trip fishing.
Then up to Maine for a day to pick up some new snow boots for my wife and daughter at LL bean.

Soberwolf

Its not 14 months yet in 14 days it will be tho
Think it started with horror movies and it was a really bad habit ive felt disgusting and the weirdest thing happened it evoked a memory now that thier growing big and strong

When my mum was alive when she got sober I remember her growing her nails and her asking me to hold out my hand so she could show me how much they have grown

And I've been doing that with my gf made me remember when my mum done it with me

Dee74

Enjoy your break Bob - I have every confidence things will turn out ok for you

whats 2 weeks between friends SW?
D

Croissant

Half a month? Lol.