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Moms and Mums Club Part 11

Old 09-27-2014, 10:44 PM
  # 181 (permalink)  
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Great to hear from you 21Reeves! It's so fun to hear about pumpkin patches and a change in the weather....

My daughter has a friend over tonight. We went to a great movie the Dolphin Tale 2 and to icecream. Before I would have thought that was quite boring but now I find it fantastic! It's fulfilling now.

I don't even think about stopping at the store to buy beer. I used to cringe buying beer with my daughter. It gave me such a gross feeling.

I was really missing out on life. Every part of it. For what???? A buzz at the end of the night. I too would stay up sooooo late to keep the buzz going. Now I go to bed early and enjoy waking up early. That was so not me.

Happy Saturday to all of you out there, even the ones who don't yet share:-)))))
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Old 09-28-2014, 06:50 PM
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21 reeves- No sober mercies is the only book I've read like that... So good
We did the pumpkin farm thing today with a bunch of friends.. So fun! God is so good.

image-2026327994.jpg

I can do all things through he who strengthens me
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Old 09-29-2014, 06:00 AM
  # 183 (permalink)  
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Good morning all - I have been reading a few posts here in anticipation of today....my first day of sobriety. Gave it a crack the beginning of the month and lasted about 6 days. Last night I told my fiancÚ that I needed to stop and cried for about an hour. I am so scared. I can't imagine a life without wine...Please tell me that it is possible. I am a mom to two boys, 9 and 22. The irony is I left their dad 8 years ago because he was/is an alcoholic and I couldn't put my younger one through the hell my older one went through. It is scary how this crept up on me.
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Old 09-29-2014, 09:18 AM
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Good Morning Moms!

Monday morning... tra-la-la. things are good here. Busy but good. Another week of husband traveling, work, workouts, quality time with the baby. Wash, rinse, repeat. It may sound like I'm complaining but I couldn't be more thrilled about each day as it comes. Its a great life... 8 months alcohol free.

Ellay, I cannot tell you how much we all empathize with you. We've all been there. The moment of realization that comes with many, many tears to ourselves and our partners. It is very hard to imagine life without wine, late night parties etc. etc. So, I say don't imagine your life without it, just imagine today, imagine dinner without wine, imagine driving by the liquor store and not stopping for booze. We all know about the scary creep, one day it seems like everyone else is drinking as much as we are and the next thing you know, you're sneaking home for wine, buying wine before you go out in case no one wants to have 'just one more' with you or you find wine bottles around the house. We're here for you. Check in as much as you need. One of the things that has helped me tremendously was finding a therapist whom I truly love and believe was part of the group that saved my life, that saved me from hitting bottom. You aren't alone. As you come out of the fog of alcohol, you'll notice that not as many people drink as you think or as much as you think.

Happy Monday all.

XO
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Old 09-29-2014, 11:28 AM
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A lady in my recovery life group at church yesterday said she was scared of what she would be loosing in the beginning but as time went by she never knew how much she would gain. I was a binge drinker. Not every day or some times not every week . But when I did it was alawys to the point of passing out.. I'm on day 29 and it had truly been a great month!

You can do it Ellay! For your kiddos and for yourself!

I can do all things through he who strengthens me
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Old 09-29-2014, 11:35 AM
  # 186 (permalink)  
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Congrats Babs on 8 months!!!!

Welcome Ellay! I'm so proud of you! There is life after drinking. So much life. And like Babs said there are a lot of people out there who don't drink. And there are those of us who get to a point where we don't want to drink anymore. And some of us who may die if we continue to drink.

I don't want to get to a point where I'm trembling and sick with my drinking. I have a spouse who also just stopped drinking. He went to rehab twice this summer. So we are both in the program. I'm at almost 8 months sober and have a 10 year old daughter and 15 year old son. They are so much happier now that I'm sober.

I have so much more patience, I look better and am so much more even now that I'm sober.

Good luck and comment often. We are all here for you and learn from you too by you sharing.

Just take it an hour at a time, figure out your triggers and get some books. Gratitude journals and daily readers are great! I also love Alanon books. It's a great way to live for anybody seeking Grace and a better way of life.

Happy Monday loves!
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Old 09-29-2014, 11:45 AM
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Congrats Alynn on 29 days!!! I bet you are feeling so much better. Keep on keeping on!!!!
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Old 09-29-2014, 04:23 PM
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Ellay~ Welcome! The beginning is really scary. I think it is really good that you told someone close to you. That's when it became real for me. I wasn't a binge drinker, but a daily wine drinker. I tried to stop so many times, switched to other alcohol, promised myself I would just drink on weekends, etc. It wasn't until I came clean with my husband did it have some staying power behind it. I've been sober 104 days. I am a mom to two girls, 10 and 8. I won't tell you it is easy, but it's the right thing, in my opinion. Come here when you need a to hear from women in the same boat. It does help. I also got a lot out of reading about others who struggle with alcohol. I really loved Wine, A Love Story. That was my first read after becoming sober. I was so shocked to read someone else telling parts of my story. I also avoided places and people that would be a trigger in the beginning. I just this week went in the grocery store that sells wine. It's not that I thought something would take over and I wouldn't be able to leave without a bottle. I just wasn't ready to face the feeling. You can do it.
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Old 09-29-2014, 06:46 PM
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Hi all..,

Congrats on 8 months Babs!!!!! Nice work!

And Alyn....29 days? Keep it up...you got this:-)

Welcome Ellay! I am a mom to a 7 year old girl, and tomorrow will be 17 months exactly...and if memory serves me right...15 months for our girl Bebetter:-).

Like you at one point I couldn't imagine life without wine, and truly believed I would not be able to live without it, I am here to tell you, it's not only possible, but truly liberating!

My life is better is just about every facet....17 months ago our family's finances were in the hole with debt collectors calling daily, and now we are debt free and planning to buy a home. I physically look like a different woman...17 months ago I was very overweight and had a tired sallow complexion, and now I am 110 pounds lighter, and look 10 years younger:-)

Believe me, I was a daily...drink in the morning, drinking on my lunch hour kind of lady, so if I can do it...so can you...just hang in there!

The first few months are not easy, but nothing worth having is ever easy! My best advice..,when you are craving...think the drink all the way through. As they say....play the tape all the way to the end....picturing not only the drink, but the next day etc.

Read and post often too. I almost relapsed once at the 2 month mark...even bought a bottle and had it in my purse, but I decided I would spend time here first, and after reading a while...the craving passes and the next morning I tossed the bottle away unopened:-)

Anyway...glad to have you with us!
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Old 10-01-2014, 10:16 AM
  # 190 (permalink)  
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Hi all!

I'm on an endorphin high right now. For months, a group of girls has been kindly inviting me to do their Wednesday morning 5k jog with them, and I've always declined out of fear - fear of slowing them down, or totally not being able to keep up. But today, I just put that fear out of my head and went for the run, and completed it! I know a 5k isn't that far, but I'm really proud of myself (29:40). Of course, they could chat the whole time, and I was huffing and puffing by the end, but still! It makes me really feel like I need to quit smoking. I only smoke a few a day, but I know it does me no favors...
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Old 10-01-2014, 12:19 PM
  # 191 (permalink)  
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Excellent BeBetter! I think a 5K is awesome!

I have an opportunity to work back at the sports club. Free membership for the family. Since I've been sober I've really taken a back seat to working out. So good for you Bebetter!!!!

I don't know why I can't get moving again. I guess since I'm so thin with just stopping drinking. I'm not motivated!! But an endorphin high sounds awesome! Maybe you will motivate me!!!!
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Old 10-01-2014, 01:09 PM
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I am a Mom to a three year old and it has been a very lonely and blurry three years. My husband and I met at a bar and our weekends without a doubt were spent drinking. It generally began about noon and, most week days we had wine - for the last 10 years. The last three of those I have been out of work (relocation and SHAM duties and trying to start a business) and I spent most days drinking and I used to start as early as 930am or as late at 3pm.

Today is day 2 of being sober. My daughter deserves it and that is where my guilt and motivation stems from. I have tried before and sought my husbands support which would end up with him buying wine, pouring me some or suggesting we go to the pub. If the temptations were not just offered I was blamed for being a "f*****g alcoholic" and then was offered wine the next day. Suffice to say I don't feel like I have the support at home.

I feel strong today though I do worry about this weekend coming up, though I have prepared an arsenal of no thank you replies at the ready.

The Mom aspect of this thread is really helpful, it's who I most strongly identify as. Thank you.
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Old 10-01-2014, 01:48 PM
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Welcome OpenWindow. You'll find that many of us can relate to your situation on some level. Most of us have been forced to face our problem because of our responsibility to our kids. It's a hard journey but one that has the potential to change your life more than you can imagine. We are here for you. Share as often as you like. We talk about everything here. It's good to have new voice to remind us all, we're not alone.

I have a 1-year old daughter and have been sober for 8 months. It's been hard. I have put together a strong support system and only told those closest to me. I don't attend AA but I'm on this site most everyday. I read a lot about other with Alcoholism and have found a lot of the 'Moms in recovery' stories to be especially beneficial. I just finished, Unwasted. Day 2 and you're in the thick of it - stay strong. This weekend will be tough but you can get through it!

LG- isn't it amazing how the weight starts to fall off? This is actually how are bodies are supposed to be - we were poisoning them. Maybe just start slow, evening walks after dinner? How is your husband?

All is good here. Husband away on his weekly trip. Taking the baby for a run and to the park after work. If we don't have an active-activity between 5-6:45, its tough to get her down at night... Counting on my 5th wind this evening.

Hope you all have a wonderful evening.

Xo
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Old 10-01-2014, 01:52 PM
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Thanks Babs and great job! I look forward to being active on SR and in this group.

I'm am off to get the wee one and make apple muffins together for our dinner dessert. Looking forward to a mug of tea instead of a mug of wine.
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Old 10-01-2014, 05:09 PM
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Hi all so far so good, day 3. I too am really nervous about the weekend, but am going to stay strong.
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Old 10-01-2014, 09:34 PM
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Welcome Open Window!!!!!! Day 2. Nice job. Honestly you are at the hardest point and you made it past day 1. That was my most difficult day. I drank daily for 20 years so not to have my nightly drink after 1 night was super hard. Good for you!

I did it for my kids at first, then like Babs said your body will thank you in so many ways. I'm at 8 months soon and feel awesome. I can't imagine going back.

Good job Ellay on 3 days! You girls rock. Give it some time. I was confident after 3 months. I tried several times for 3 weeks then again for a month. But now I really feel good and don't want alcohol anymore.

My hubby is doing well. He had a binge about 6 weeks ago. I learned from Alanon to let go and sent him away. He came home sober and has been ever since. I'm very proud of him. He sought out his sponsor not me which was huge and is doing it now for himself. I think we all need to get to that point. Believing km powerless over alcohol and his drinking is key to my sanity. We were a pretty bad influence on each other!!!

Support is here.

We are the good the bad and the beautiful! Lol.

Babs- I'm taking the dog for walks. When I was hung over I'd be breathing heavy up the hills. No more baby!
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Old 10-03-2014, 06:50 PM
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Hi everyone....

Friday night and my little girl is asleep. Had to turn the heat on tonight for the first time this winter...such a bummer!

For once I am wishing my daughter was home schooled. With these scary diseases bouncing around like Enterivurus68 and now even scarier...Ebola, wish I could seal her in a bubble to keep her safe, but alas...that isn't possible:-(

Other than that, it was a beautiful day here, and I took a day off work to get some organizing type chores done.

Well...hope you all are having a good night!
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Old 10-04-2014, 05:03 AM
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Awesome - bebetter . I have got to start up again!

Hang in there open window and ellay! One day at a time

Hope everyone is having a fantastic weekend!

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Old 10-06-2014, 09:08 PM
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I've been really craving a drink the past fees days. My best friend invited me to go out with her. I said no because I knew she would be drinking and I would feel left out. Then she went to a beautiful winery the next day. I again felt resentful

. I'm really craving a buzz. I'm also majorly PMS'ing. Is that a trigger for any of you?
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Old 10-06-2014, 09:16 PM
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I wasn't done proof reading my thread. Oh well.

I'm feeling angry too.

Maybe it's just hormones.

I need to plan another trip or something do I can have something to look forward to.

It's not a good combo when I'm about to get my period and my son is full of teenage hormones. We act just like the other! Lol

If I had the night to myself tonight (which I don't ever) I would go and buy a half case. I'd probably be so buzzed off a half a beer!

Just being honest.
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