One Year & Under Club Part 31
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: PA and Florida
Posts: 4,179
Last day with the "thing". Going to do yard work when I return home tomorrow. Golf will be next on my agenda after that.
Gilmer, please go easy on yourself. Lots of functions return after absences
. I commend you for hanging in there as long as you did, given the lack of motivation and reward that class offered you personally.
Else, glad you had a good day yesterday. That cake, totally awesome sauce!
DG, I ordered a book on Amazon that I think you would enjoy, called:
Hijacking The Brain, How Drug and Alcohol Addiction Hijacks our Brains – The Science Behind Twelve-Step Recovery.
A couple passages:
Just as viruses hijack a cell’s RNA and DNA, drugs of abuse hijack the brain’s core reward pathway to promote continued use. Just as the cell’s survival is dependent on its core DNA and RNA, so is the survival of the organism dependent on an intact brain reward pathway. By hijacking the brain’s reward pathways, drugs of abuse—through changes in emotions, cognitive function, and behaviors—all too frequently lead to severely negative consequences for the host/user, including death.
another:
Addiction is due to a dysfunctional, substance-dependent reward system, and is characterized by a stress state and cognitive impairment. Once an addict takes a drink or drug, the brain’s limbic reward centers are activated strongly while, concurrently, the stress-response is activated and decision-making centers in the frontal lobe shut down. The body is reacting to a foreign substance that disrupts the nervous system. There is elevation of the stress hormone, cortisol, and a generalized increase in the activity of the excitatory nervous system, particularly in withdrawal states and in reaction to life stress. There is associated cognitive decline characterized by poor decision-making and judgment.
BF, glad you like the passage from Jan 6th, Twenty Four Hours A Day book.. Like I said, I read that out loud every morning. Try it, it's good and nice, like Rufis.
Dottie, glad to see that you posted. I was thinking that you had moved "over" on us. I was about to send that other Canadian with a posse to find you...eh!
Cowboy, hope the seeding had been successful and enjoyable.
Glee, we are both headed to game 7's. Win or go home. Wow, I sure hope we get our showdown! Also, I hope that you share a nugget from your expansive thoughts. With me, in my confinement, as Crosby, Still, Nash say, "contemplation can slip away"...but tomorrow offers new freedoms!
Courage, Dee and Toots - Thank you for the advise-based posts that you offered SJ and Babs. I am just one elbow turn away from total disaster returning to my life and I can never forget that!
SJ and Babs, some good stuff there. I hope you guys are doing well today!
Tanja, where are you hiding, girl? Hope all is well with you!!
I gotts to run, gang. Enjoy a safe and sober Tuesday, all.
Carlos xx
Gilmer, please go easy on yourself. Lots of functions return after absences
. I commend you for hanging in there as long as you did, given the lack of motivation and reward that class offered you personally.Else, glad you had a good day yesterday. That cake, totally awesome sauce!
DG, I ordered a book on Amazon that I think you would enjoy, called:
Hijacking The Brain, How Drug and Alcohol Addiction Hijacks our Brains – The Science Behind Twelve-Step Recovery.
A couple passages:
Just as viruses hijack a cell’s RNA and DNA, drugs of abuse hijack the brain’s core reward pathway to promote continued use. Just as the cell’s survival is dependent on its core DNA and RNA, so is the survival of the organism dependent on an intact brain reward pathway. By hijacking the brain’s reward pathways, drugs of abuse—through changes in emotions, cognitive function, and behaviors—all too frequently lead to severely negative consequences for the host/user, including death.
another:
Addiction is due to a dysfunctional, substance-dependent reward system, and is characterized by a stress state and cognitive impairment. Once an addict takes a drink or drug, the brain’s limbic reward centers are activated strongly while, concurrently, the stress-response is activated and decision-making centers in the frontal lobe shut down. The body is reacting to a foreign substance that disrupts the nervous system. There is elevation of the stress hormone, cortisol, and a generalized increase in the activity of the excitatory nervous system, particularly in withdrawal states and in reaction to life stress. There is associated cognitive decline characterized by poor decision-making and judgment.
BF, glad you like the passage from Jan 6th, Twenty Four Hours A Day book.. Like I said, I read that out loud every morning. Try it, it's good and nice, like Rufis.
Dottie, glad to see that you posted. I was thinking that you had moved "over" on us. I was about to send that other Canadian with a posse to find you...eh!
Cowboy, hope the seeding had been successful and enjoyable.
Glee, we are both headed to game 7's. Win or go home. Wow, I sure hope we get our showdown! Also, I hope that you share a nugget from your expansive thoughts. With me, in my confinement, as Crosby, Still, Nash say, "contemplation can slip away"...but tomorrow offers new freedoms!
Courage, Dee and Toots - Thank you for the advise-based posts that you offered SJ and Babs. I am just one elbow turn away from total disaster returning to my life and I can never forget that!
SJ and Babs, some good stuff there. I hope you guys are doing well today!
Tanja, where are you hiding, girl? Hope all is well with you!!
I gotts to run, gang. Enjoy a safe and sober Tuesday, all.
Carlos xx
Guest
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Ashburn, VA
Posts: 30,196
I'm in a motel room now. (It's not what you think, Carlos!).
My 18-y-o son and i just finished a 4 hour roadtrip to his new town. We had a great time listening to his playlist. Good rock. We're chilling for an hour in our room, then we're going jobhunting. Then we'll meet my other son for dinner and get a tour of his apartment, where his younger brother will be moving next Tuesday.
My 18-y-o son and i just finished a 4 hour roadtrip to his new town. We had a great time listening to his playlist. Good rock. We're chilling for an hour in our room, then we're going jobhunting. Then we'll meet my other son for dinner and get a tour of his apartment, where his younger brother will be moving next Tuesday.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 4,672
no plans courage---it's been really busy here at work so, I'm looking forward to
having a quiet eve. I trained in a new gal yesterday so, of course there is always
stuff you put off doing. That keeps me out of trouble here at work too. ha ha
having a quiet eve. I trained in a new gal yesterday so, of course there is always
stuff you put off doing. That keeps me out of trouble here at work too. ha ha
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: New England, USA
Posts: 3,958
Gilmer - congratulations on letting your inner voice guide your decision about your course. It can be a struggle, for me at least, to be authentic. It's so much easier to be what others want me to be, that what I think I "should" be is probably based on society's expectations. Your completion of this course has no bearing on your ability to learn or teach. You show a tremendous capacity to express yourself on this thread, follow everyone's stories, and share what you know in a way that we can understand..... Enjoy this visit with your sons. I hope it's a rejuvenating one!
Babs - what are you doing to stay away from drinking today?
Else - Mmmm, cake! Glad your spirits are brighter. I never thanked you for the compliment earlier in the thread on my writing. It made my day; I can't believe I forgot to tell you.
Carlos - I think all of our ankles will be feeling a little bit freer tomorrow morning!
My current state of recovery reminds me of trying to untangle a bunch of old necklaces in a jewelry box. I get one piece loose, make some progress, and end up at another knot.
I had a bad case of the all or nothing's, followed by some codependent angry behavior with a coworker who pushed my buttons, then felt fat, then penned a strict diet for myself, then got depressed that I'll probably fail because I always have in the past, and.....
I feel down. I'm optimistic that this will pass, like all feelings do. This moody alcoholic is learning how to exist in her uncomfortable feelings, and not turn to external stimuli to change her feelings.
Drinking isn't going to get me to the place of peace and serenity. I'll get through today's difficult feelings without drinking.
Babs - what are you doing to stay away from drinking today?
Else - Mmmm, cake! Glad your spirits are brighter. I never thanked you for the compliment earlier in the thread on my writing. It made my day; I can't believe I forgot to tell you.
Carlos - I think all of our ankles will be feeling a little bit freer tomorrow morning!
My current state of recovery reminds me of trying to untangle a bunch of old necklaces in a jewelry box. I get one piece loose, make some progress, and end up at another knot.
I had a bad case of the all or nothing's, followed by some codependent angry behavior with a coworker who pushed my buttons, then felt fat, then penned a strict diet for myself, then got depressed that I'll probably fail because I always have in the past, and.....
I feel down. I'm optimistic that this will pass, like all feelings do. This moody alcoholic is learning how to exist in her uncomfortable feelings, and not turn to external stimuli to change her feelings.
Drinking isn't going to get me to the place of peace and serenity. I'll get through today's difficult feelings without drinking.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: PA and Florida
Posts: 4,179
OUCH!! This thing is killing me, but...(see quote below) and, unless I awake real early tomorrow morning, that will be my last of those.
Oh Glee, I sooo agree!
So Gilmer, how did the job hunting go?
Courage, I agree, no morning wreckage. Whew, what a relief.
tata, just a brief drop in. Nite, all.
Originally Posted by gleefan 
Drinking isn't going to get me to the place of peace and serenity. I'll get through today's difficult feelings without drinking.
So Gilmer, how did the job hunting go?
Courage, I agree, no morning wreckage. Whew, what a relief.
tata, just a brief drop in. Nite, all.
Guest
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Ashburn, VA
Posts: 30,196
We stayed in and researched sites. Then we had pizza and watched a movie! Then I went to sleep and he went over to his brother's apartment. He likes it and will feel right at home there. Tomorrow we're going to start with breakfast at Cracker Barrel, then hit supermarkets in the three-town area. There's one a half-block away from the apartment--we'll go there first!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: CA
Posts: 2,977
Gilmer sounds like you're having some fun hangin with your son. Fingers crossed he's able to find a job soon!
DG thanks for posting that PAWS link!
Carlos tomorrow's the big day for the ankle bracelet to come off?!? Woohoo!
GF I'm starting to finally realize too that emotions of being upset or having a bad day are only temporary. Sounds like you have a pretty positive outlook on things or are atleast trying to! Hope tomorrow's better for you.
And ya where is Tanja??
Work was ok. Nothing too exciting happening today. Got up to 97 degrees today, yuck! Trying to stay cool drinking a tall glass of iced tea and listening to some music. Grateful to be sober another day!
DG thanks for posting that PAWS link!
Carlos tomorrow's the big day for the ankle bracelet to come off?!? Woohoo!
GF I'm starting to finally realize too that emotions of being upset or having a bad day are only temporary. Sounds like you have a pretty positive outlook on things or are atleast trying to! Hope tomorrow's better for you.
And ya where is Tanja??
Work was ok. Nothing too exciting happening today. Got up to 97 degrees today, yuck! Trying to stay cool drinking a tall glass of iced tea and listening to some music. Grateful to be sober another day!
p***enger
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: NYC
Posts: 19,025
MB, Happy birthday! 
Boozefree, something in your recent posts strikes me -- like a new commitment? I'm glad you're loving your music & wish you lots of positive rewards in your life. What kind of work do you do? Is it something you want to keep doing in the long term?
Gilmer, it sounds like you're really having fun on the trip with your son. I miss my son. Enjoy!
Carlos, I guess you're all squared away for the evening. I wish you a day tomorrow that's happy, joyous, and FREE!
Gleefan, I understand and sympathize with you about the moods. A lot of what I'm trying to learn now is how to comfort myself when I'm worried or slightly depressed without turning to alcohol. What do you do that gets you out of your head? I don't think it all has to be about self-improvement -- watching stupid old TV shows, taking walks, baking a cake like Elseware --those are all good parts of life that people like us either missed out on or failed to appreciate when we were drinking and using.
Babs, I hope you're having a restful & peaceful night. Glad you checked in here today and hope to hear more from you.
DG, your last post was amazing! You've come an incredible way.
I hope everyone has a good/day night -- the way I see it, given our odds, every 24 hours that we have is a very lucky, very unlikely throw of the universal dice.
Boozefree, something in your recent posts strikes me -- like a new commitment? I'm glad you're loving your music & wish you lots of positive rewards in your life. What kind of work do you do? Is it something you want to keep doing in the long term?
Gilmer, it sounds like you're really having fun on the trip with your son. I miss my son. Enjoy!
Carlos, I guess you're all squared away for the evening. I wish you a day tomorrow that's happy, joyous, and FREE!
Gleefan, I understand and sympathize with you about the moods. A lot of what I'm trying to learn now is how to comfort myself when I'm worried or slightly depressed without turning to alcohol. What do you do that gets you out of your head? I don't think it all has to be about self-improvement -- watching stupid old TV shows, taking walks, baking a cake like Elseware --those are all good parts of life that people like us either missed out on or failed to appreciate when we were drinking and using.
Babs, I hope you're having a restful & peaceful night. Glad you checked in here today and hope to hear more from you.
DG, your last post was amazing! You've come an incredible way.
I hope everyone has a good/day night -- the way I see it, given our odds, every 24 hours that we have is a very lucky, very unlikely throw of the universal dice.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: PA and Florida
Posts: 4,179
Morning Undies,
Thanks, Gilmer. Actually, my ride will be here soon. It will be off by 8:20ish. Turns out that it is my buddy that the golf event was for his son last week that is giving me a ride. So this morning I get to give him that big hug!
Congrats on 14 months, Toots!
HB-MB
Today, as you know, I am being released from the time and space bondage that has in many ways been all encompassing these past 3 weeks, or longer. During this time I have allowed myself to self-loath, self-pity and stagnate my growth and recovery.
It is amazing to me how quickly my stinking “alkie thinking” can consume me. Allowing that negative thinking back into my life so quickly just reinforces the progressive nature of this disease. I am grateful for the true recovery steps that I took during the many month prior to this setback. I surely needed that foundation.
Yes, my toolbox was deep enough to keep me from the booze thinking. I carry little to no desire to drink. However, my disease is “alcoholism” and drinking is but one of its symptoms (albeit the most destructive symptom).
Bottom line, I allowed myself to relapse emotionally. Today I plan a return to the healing of mind, body and spirit. Sorry to have been such a cranky pants (as a friend called me).
Enjoy a happy and productive day, Undies. No messing with the bad stuff, okay?
Carlos xx
Thanks, Gilmer. Actually, my ride will be here soon. It will be off by 8:20ish. Turns out that it is my buddy that the golf event was for his son last week that is giving me a ride. So this morning I get to give him that big hug!
Congrats on 14 months, Toots!
HB-MB
Today, as you know, I am being released from the time and space bondage that has in many ways been all encompassing these past 3 weeks, or longer. During this time I have allowed myself to self-loath, self-pity and stagnate my growth and recovery.
It is amazing to me how quickly my stinking “alkie thinking” can consume me. Allowing that negative thinking back into my life so quickly just reinforces the progressive nature of this disease. I am grateful for the true recovery steps that I took during the many month prior to this setback. I surely needed that foundation.
Yes, my toolbox was deep enough to keep me from the booze thinking. I carry little to no desire to drink. However, my disease is “alcoholism” and drinking is but one of its symptoms (albeit the most destructive symptom).
Bottom line, I allowed myself to relapse emotionally. Today I plan a return to the healing of mind, body and spirit. Sorry to have been such a cranky pants (as a friend called me).
Enjoy a happy and productive day, Undies. No messing with the bad stuff, okay?
Carlos xx
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