Class of April 2014 Part 3
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Pacific Northwest
Posts: 684
Well, it's a few minutes after 1:00am, and I slept for maybe 2 hours. I actually thought it might be morning when I first woke up.
I think this is probably why opiate users relapse. I really have no desire for them, but I can see how the need for just one night of sleep could override that resolve.
Even my hair is irritating me. Either it's down, and I feel like I'm getting tangled up in it, or it's up, and the weight of it makes my head hurt. I'm trying to keep myself from going for the scissors, since that's never turned out well.
I know this won't last forever, but it kind of feels like it already has.
I think this is probably why opiate users relapse. I really have no desire for them, but I can see how the need for just one night of sleep could override that resolve.
Even my hair is irritating me. Either it's down, and I feel like I'm getting tangled up in it, or it's up, and the weight of it makes my head hurt. I'm trying to keep myself from going for the scissors, since that's never turned out well.
I know this won't last forever, but it kind of feels like it already has.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Long Beach, NY
Posts: 2,317
Originally Posted by Adnamaeel 
Well, it's a few minutes after 1:00am, and I slept for maybe 2 hours. I actually thought it might be morning when I first woke up. I think this is probably why opiate users relapse. I really have no desire for them, but I can see how the need for just one night of sleep could override that resolve. Even my hair is irritating me. Either it's down, and I feel like I'm getting tangled up in it, or it's up, and the weight of it makes my head hurt. I'm trying to keep myself from going for the scissors, since that's never turned out well. I know this won't last forever, but it kind of feels like it already has.
I can relate for sure, when I lay down is the only time I'm not irritated. But the smallest, most mundane things are going right thru me. I keep telling myself that it's just the fact that I'm commin off some stuff, and it will fade in time.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Japan
Posts: 147
Adnamaeel- I hope that you were able to get back to sleep, I struggle with insomnia from time to time, so I know how much it can suck. For me the cause was a couple day binge which threw my sleep schedule off. Then trying to get back to a regular sleep pattern while not drinking for a couple days. Rinse and repeat. My internal clock Must have been really messed up...
That being said, it's just past 9pm here and I'm in bed with a good book. I'm at the end of day 6, and it seems like my sleep has started to revert to somewhat normal the past couple nights. I've had crazy dreams almost throughout the whole night- waking up every hour or 2 for a short time, so not perfect, but it's a start...
Today was good: Yoga in the morning, busy day teaching at a kindergarten, pool in the evening and a healthy dinner. Trying to stay positive and focus on building a better future for myself while putting my sobriety first in these very early days.
Looking forward to the first of many no hangover Saturdays!!!!
That being said, it's just past 9pm here and I'm in bed with a good book. I'm at the end of day 6, and it seems like my sleep has started to revert to somewhat normal the past couple nights. I've had crazy dreams almost throughout the whole night- waking up every hour or 2 for a short time, so not perfect, but it's a start...
Today was good: Yoga in the morning, busy day teaching at a kindergarten, pool in the evening and a healthy dinner. Trying to stay positive and focus on building a better future for myself while putting my sobriety first in these very early days.
Looking forward to the first of many no hangover Saturdays!!!!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Long Beach, NY
Posts: 2,317
I'm feeling more confident today, and way less anxious. Two people have given me the analogy of looking at my AV and anxiety like a beast, and keeping it under control etc. and it seems to be working. I'm freezing cold, tired, and weak feeling from very little sleep and crying so hard, but the tightness in my chest has backed off significantly. I'm wrapped up in warm clothes and ready to own my day at work today. Be well and stay strong today everyone. I'm gonna go out of my way to make my day 9 a better one.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Alberta, Canada
Posts: 556
It is a beautiful Good Friday morning here in AZ as I woke early to watch the sunrise on my deck with a nice cup of coffee. No shakes!
Day 6 begins.
I am pretty sure I've got the next 24 hours covered. Teaching a class this morning. A luncheon at a friend's house, out for dinner and then Good Friday Church services tonight.
I wish every classmate a wonderful next 24 hours. God Speed.
Day 6 begins.
I am pretty sure I've got the next 24 hours covered. Teaching a class this morning. A luncheon at a friend's house, out for dinner and then Good Friday Church services tonight.
I wish every classmate a wonderful next 24 hours. God Speed.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 272
Morning all!
I had the craziest dream last night - I dreamt I was a cheetah. I've dreamed many things before, but I don't think I've dreamed I was another animal. People were hunting me and I was fighting and running and trying to get home.
I have very violent dreams quite often. They usually involve being tortured, terrorized, stalked, or killed. I think they have meaning in an abstract way - they represent anxiety about change. I just wish my subconscious wasn't so graphic. A cat, though? That's a new one.
Regardless of the poor night's sleep, I'm awaking to a happy and healthy day 7. I know the weekends are tough for all of us, so let's stick together and pull through!
I had the craziest dream last night - I dreamt I was a cheetah. I've dreamed many things before, but I don't think I've dreamed I was another animal. People were hunting me and I was fighting and running and trying to get home.
I have very violent dreams quite often. They usually involve being tortured, terrorized, stalked, or killed. I think they have meaning in an abstract way - they represent anxiety about change. I just wish my subconscious wasn't so graphic. A cat, though? That's a new one.
Regardless of the poor night's sleep, I'm awaking to a happy and healthy day 7. I know the weekends are tough for all of us, so let's stick together and pull through!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Gulf Coast, USA
Posts: 2,229
Another Class Mate
Hi all, just wondering if I could join the Class of April?
I've been following this thread for the entire month but just got up the courage to post. After 21 years of hard, daily drinking I decided to make a change last year when I stumbled onto SR.
Although I didn't become a member I could relate to many of the people and experiences. I always thought I was the only one who really couldn't stop. I finally made the difficult choice to stop drinking. Didn't even tell my wife about my choice because I was such a heavy drinker I knew she wouldn't believe I could ever do it.
Hardest thing I have ever had to do. After a few failed attempts, I ultimately lasted 9 months and loved the feeling of sobriety. I was a much happier person, father and husband. Before the Holidays, my AV got the best of me and I thought I could transform into a social drinker with the ability to limit my consumption... You all know what happens next. I am back to drinking 12-18 beers every weeknight and over a case a day on the weekend. I have to stop and this time for good.
Yesterday I made it through my first day and moved onto day number 2. Even through I haven't posted up until now, I appreciate everyone's stories, life experiences and suggestions. You guys didn't know it but you got me through a hard night last night. Now outside of limited sleep, I feel great having one day down.
Even though I am starting mid April, hopefully I can join the class and possibly add to the group's successes!
Thanks for listening and sorry for the long post. Just didn't know where to begin.
I've been following this thread for the entire month but just got up the courage to post. After 21 years of hard, daily drinking I decided to make a change last year when I stumbled onto SR.
Although I didn't become a member I could relate to many of the people and experiences. I always thought I was the only one who really couldn't stop. I finally made the difficult choice to stop drinking. Didn't even tell my wife about my choice because I was such a heavy drinker I knew she wouldn't believe I could ever do it.
Hardest thing I have ever had to do. After a few failed attempts, I ultimately lasted 9 months and loved the feeling of sobriety. I was a much happier person, father and husband. Before the Holidays, my AV got the best of me and I thought I could transform into a social drinker with the ability to limit my consumption... You all know what happens next. I am back to drinking 12-18 beers every weeknight and over a case a day on the weekend. I have to stop and this time for good.
Yesterday I made it through my first day and moved onto day number 2. Even through I haven't posted up until now, I appreciate everyone's stories, life experiences and suggestions. You guys didn't know it but you got me through a hard night last night. Now outside of limited sleep, I feel great having one day down.
Even though I am starting mid April, hopefully I can join the class and possibly add to the group's successes!
Thanks for listening and sorry for the long post. Just didn't know where to begin.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Lowcountry
Posts: 2,762
Originally Posted by areyoukittenme
Welcome, ccam1973! The "social drinker" fantasy got me too, after about 3 months sobriety. It's a seductive one.
And hi, topspin! Hope you're doing well.
And hi, topspin! Hope you're doing well.
Been catching up on some much needed sleep, ...
I got caught up in the "social drinker " experiment too. Back in the Fall of 2012. Either I'm a slow learner , ; mule headed , or both !?!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Lowcountry
Posts: 2,762
ST,
Was following your thread over in the Newcomers ,
......several responses have been so helpful for me , ,......particularly the ones' from Zerothehero.
...Something about his comments really resonate with me.
Good job , starting a new thread.
Was following your thread over in the Newcomers ,
......several responses have been so helpful for me , ,......particularly the ones' from Zerothehero.
...Something about his comments really resonate with me.
Good job , starting a new thread.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Long Beach, NY
Posts: 2,317
Originally Posted by topspin
ST, Was following your thread over in the Newcomers , ......several responses have been so helpful for me , ,......particularly the ones' from Zerothehero. ...Something about his comments really resonate with me. Good job , starting a new thread.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Long Beach, NY
Posts: 2,317
Originally Posted by topspin
ST, Was following your thread over in the Newcomers , ......several responses have been so helpful for me , ,......particularly the ones' from Zerothehero. ...Something about his comments really resonate with me. Good job , starting a new thread.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Long Beach, NY
Posts: 2,317
Originally Posted by 4Surf4Life
Damn, ST! You keep beating me to the posts! I've got to work on my iPhone speed typing skills... You just getting off work?
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Long Beach, NY
Posts: 2,317
Originally Posted by StormiNormi
It is a beautiful Good Friday morning here in AZ as I woke early to watch the sunrise on my deck with a nice cup of coffee. No shakes! Day 6 begins. I am pretty sure I've got the next 24 hours covered. Teaching a class this morning. A luncheon at a friend's house, out for dinner and then Good Friday Church services tonight. I wish every classmate a wonderful next 24 hours. God Speed.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Long Beach, NY
Posts: 2,317
Thanks everyone for understanding my high anxiety levels, I'm sure some of you can relate. I'm flowing thru my work day like water and I'm excited to get off work and spend my Friday evening doing a TON of reading. And eating...
Hillbilly Girl
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: In my Garden
Posts: 3,953
Glad you are here Ccam....Great support here
4 days...headed off in day 5. Don't know if I can keep the appointment for my buddy today. Hope everyone has a good day today.
DD....I once dreamed that I delivered a baby from a soda machine & that was a sober dream.
4 days...headed off in day 5. Don't know if I can keep the appointment for my buddy today. Hope everyone has a good day today.
DD....I once dreamed that I delivered a baby from a soda machine
& that was a sober dream.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Long Beach, NY
Posts: 2,317
Also, I'm not gonna name names, but a special someone I met my first day here, came and had breakfast in my job and shockingly introduced themselvs to me. Blew my mind! It caught me off guard at first but was insanely comforting. He made sure I was doing ok! Guys this just got real...I really feel it, a wonderful woman prayed for me last night and helped me feel so much better...this is all just new to me, and oddly surreal, like I'm waiting for the catch, like where's the fine print?
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