Class Of March 2014 Part 8
Morning... One whole month since i last drank, got soooo pissed that i decided to change my life forever.... The incident still haunts me, but it has catalysed change, so look on the brightside!!! Thanks everyone, couldn't have done it without you!!! Xxx
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Atlantic Beach, NY
Posts: 246
congratulations!!!
Shoo....ACYPAA kicked my ass. It was fun though! I really enjoyed driving my two new friends down and back. About 600 miles each way. A solid 10 hours of driving each way! So tired! Also, my husband passed his cold onto me the morning we left. Still, i had a blast. The panels were great, the speakers were amazing and the dances...the dances were insane! It seems the kids these days do a lot of jumping while they dance. I spent a bit of the dance just standing by the wall and enjoying the joyful, sober celebration going on. It's got me thinking about going to ICYPAA in Texas.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Atlantic Beach, NY
Posts: 246
Morning of day 16 here. I had a beautiful weekend with my husband. That ended in an argument that I spun into a much bigger argument that I was trying to use as a way to get him to give me the green light to drink. Or at least the green light to quit going to AA.
He didn't do that. Which made me very sad/frustrated/angry.
I wish these emotions would stop. I wish the thoughts would stop.
I keep waiting for my pink cloud. Where the hell is my pink cloud??!!!
He didn't do that. Which made me very sad/frustrated/angry.
I wish these emotions would stop. I wish the thoughts would stop.
I keep waiting for my pink cloud. Where the hell is my pink cloud??!!!
Kims friend, well done on day 16! Youre doing great x
Efin, happy monthaversarie to you too x
And to everyone well done on making it another day, we can do it...even if youve had a slip you will do it in the end! We are so much stronger than we think.
Group hug
Efin, happy monthaversarie to you too x
And to everyone well done on making it another day, we can do it...even if youve had a slip you will do it in the end! We are so much stronger than we think.
Group hug
Good Day All!!!
Nice long weekend...It is amazing how much longer weekends are when you are sober>
Congrats to all successes whether it is day one or any day beyond....
Each and everyday not drinking is a day to celebrate.
Smiles everyone!
Peace
Dave
Nice long weekend...It is amazing how much longer weekends are when you are sober>
Congrats to all successes whether it is day one or any day beyond....
Each and everyday not drinking is a day to celebrate.
Smiles everyone!
Peace
Dave
Hey, Kimsfriend! I know how frustrating arguing with a husband can be! The thing is, if i'm looking for an excuse to drink or quit AA, i'll make one. If i really want to drink, i'll drink and i'll be damned if anything gets in my way. Give a sober drunk a call and talk to her. Get it out of your system and see if she can give you a perspective on the situation from someone who isn't in the middle of it.
I have times i want to quit going to meetings and i find that those are the times i absolutely have to get to a meeting. If i start to isolate myself from others in recovery, i know what will happen. I'll eventually let my resentments build up and i'll end up in the drink. Happens every time.
Keep on moving forward and reach out for help when you need it. Help will always be there reaching back.
Regarding the pink cloud, it's a dangerous thing. I floated on a pink cloud for a few months my first time i got sober. The problem was, i built my sobriety on that frickin' cloud. When it faded, as clouds do, i found that my foundation for my recovery was gone. I had no sponsor, no step work and no one i was comfortable talking to. The cloud was gone and i was alone. I wish my first experience was a little more grounded. So i guess that what i'm saying is, don't worry too much about the pink cloud effect. It lured me into a false sense of security. Perhaps walking a harder, but more solid path will help you build a strong foundation of recovery. You can do this!!
I have times i want to quit going to meetings and i find that those are the times i absolutely have to get to a meeting. If i start to isolate myself from others in recovery, i know what will happen. I'll eventually let my resentments build up and i'll end up in the drink. Happens every time.
Keep on moving forward and reach out for help when you need it. Help will always be there reaching back.
Regarding the pink cloud, it's a dangerous thing. I floated on a pink cloud for a few months my first time i got sober. The problem was, i built my sobriety on that frickin' cloud. When it faded, as clouds do, i found that my foundation for my recovery was gone. I had no sponsor, no step work and no one i was comfortable talking to. The cloud was gone and i was alone. I wish my first experience was a little more grounded. So i guess that what i'm saying is, don't worry too much about the pink cloud effect. It lured me into a false sense of security. Perhaps walking a harder, but more solid path will help you build a strong foundation of recovery. You can do this!!
I really can't believe I passed four weeks I jogged my memory, and I know for sure that in all of my attempts in the past I've never made it past two weeks. Sometimes I proceeded after that but sometimes I fell right back in.
This is a true accomplishment
I feel pretty good:
My sleep has regulated
I'm paying more attention to healthy routines and things: flossing, washing my face, exercise
My appetite seems to have evened out a bit, mostly I just feel aware of hunger and I can remember what I ate recently and I'm trying to make good choices (I generally eat whatever I want but I do love vegetables so I'm just trying to eat as many as I can
I'm still afraid of the scale but I have one pair of jeans I can use to judge. I guess I'm just so afraid of disappointment. What if I haven't lost a pound? Scales are really loaded :/
But all in all I know I've gotten a lot done this month. Well, the first week was very lazy and cocooned. Then there were two weeks just filled with bug drama. But this past week I've really accomplished a lot. Mostly just finishing many projects I've been meaning to finish and starting ones that have been collecting dust. But it's great.
Here I go off to Staples to try to choose some cost effective paper....
This is a true accomplishment
I feel pretty good:
My sleep has regulated
I'm paying more attention to healthy routines and things: flossing, washing my face, exercise
My appetite seems to have evened out a bit, mostly I just feel aware of hunger and I can remember what I ate recently and I'm trying to make good choices (I generally eat whatever I want but I do love vegetables so I'm just trying to eat as many as I can
I'm still afraid of the scale but I have one pair of jeans I can use to judge. I guess I'm just so afraid of disappointment. What if I haven't lost a pound? Scales are really loaded :/
But all in all I know I've gotten a lot done this month. Well, the first week was very lazy and cocooned. Then there were two weeks just filled with bug drama. But this past week I've really accomplished a lot. Mostly just finishing many projects I've been meaning to finish and starting ones that have been collecting dust. But it's great.
Here I go off to Staples to try to choose some cost effective paper....
Ok I felt brave enough to get on the scale and the results were not good. The thought, "Why am I even doing this?" shot through my mind.
Sigh. Honestly, the scale was disappointing, the jeans didn't fit at all, but despite all of that, I've been feeling great in my body and I actually think I look good in the mirror.
How is that possible. Because by all accounts I'm still overweight. And even more so than I was when I quit drinking.
I will never understand why we were cursed with this dreadful body image and dysmorphic problem. I will never understand why we are raised scrutinizing ourselves into paper thin waifs. This makes me so angry.
Sigh. Honestly, the scale was disappointing, the jeans didn't fit at all, but despite all of that, I've been feeling great in my body and I actually think I look good in the mirror.
How is that possible. Because by all accounts I'm still overweight. And even more so than I was when I quit drinking.
I will never understand why we were cursed with this dreadful body image and dysmorphic problem. I will never understand why we are raised scrutinizing ourselves into paper thin waifs. This makes me so angry.
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