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Class Of February 2014 Part 7

Old 04-02-2014, 07:22 AM
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Checking in here. Week going great. If any one has even noticed my red solo cup has iced tea in it, they haven't mentioned it!

Torn- The ambulance bill is just the end of your 'tape'. Next time the AV kicks in you can put a dollar sign on it!
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Old 04-02-2014, 07:41 AM
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Originally Posted by DiggingIn View Post
Checking in here. Week going great. If any one has even noticed my red solo cup has iced tea in it, they haven't mentioned it!

Torn- The ambulance bill is just the end of your 'tape'. Next time the AV kicks in you can put a dollar sign on it!

Glad to hear things are going well. (loved that red solo cup song).
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Old 04-02-2014, 08:56 AM
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Do you guys think just stating in your head over and over I'm not or I no longer a drinker helps you believe it eventually?
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Old 04-02-2014, 09:05 AM
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Originally Posted by tornrealization View Post
Do you guys think just stating in your head over and over I'm not or I no longer a drinker helps you believe it eventually?
I think so. I remember doing that a lot in the early days, especially during the day (at times when I would ordinarily think "how long 'til happy hour"); I would repeat over and over in my head "I no longer drink". I still do it sometimes when I am getting ready to go out to dinner with friends. I have always found that kind of affirmation/re-affirmation helpful (similar to counting sober days).
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Old 04-02-2014, 09:49 AM
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Originally Posted by tornrealization View Post
Do you guys think just stating in your head over and over I'm not or I no longer a drinker helps you believe it eventually?
Honestly, I guess I'm still at the point where I say to myself "TODAY I will not drink." Maybe I'm just a little behind, or maybe that's just the only way I'm going to be able to live sober.
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Old 04-02-2014, 10:15 AM
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Originally Posted by DiggingIn View Post

Honestly, I guess I'm still at the point where I say to myself "TODAY I will not drink." Maybe I'm just a little behind, or maybe that's just the only way I'm going to be able to live sober.
I still do that too. I'm all over the place in my brain.
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Old 04-02-2014, 10:26 AM
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Hi guys, Im good.

Lots of good posts. I heard that affirmations should be positive and present tense to work. So instead of ' I no longer drink' should be 'I enjoy my sober life' or some such. That was in a book called Teach yourself self motivation.

keep up the good work all
Cheers G
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Old 04-02-2014, 10:53 AM
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DI, I'm still at the "today" stage as well. I pretty much can expect when my cravings will hit each day and I just need to do whatever it takes to ride them out.
As my workday is winding down right now I am already thinking about how nice it would be to escape into a few glasses of wine. But then I think of how inevitably awful I will feel tomorrow and how much harder it will be to start again. That's what is keeping me going for now. That and knowing that it does get easier. And reading and posting here, of course
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Old 04-02-2014, 11:48 AM
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Hi, everyone!

I'm here on day 3 of being at home with a sick kid. It's never ending! But I think she's better today.

Yay, GEAH, for your 30 day chip! It's great to set mini-goals like that. I think I keep going weekly and looking forward to adding another week each time.

I just read a good fiction book about alcoholism called "The Good House" by Ann Leary. I like to get away from the motivational books for a little while and get lost in some drama sometimes.

Saying I don't drink anymore sounds kind of weird. I think I, too, fluctuate between just getting through the day and feeling as if I've arrived at non-drinker status for good. It depends on the day.

Have a good Wednesday!
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Old 04-02-2014, 12:22 PM
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Originally Posted by tornrealization View Post
I still do that too. I'm all over the place in my brain.
It will settle down torn, I get times when my thoughts are like a hurricane crashing around in my mind. I just hold on to the thought that it passes eventually.
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Old 04-02-2014, 12:44 PM
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Originally Posted by LonelyShadow View Post
It will settle down torn, I get times when my thoughts are like a hurricane crashing around in my mind. I just hold on to the thought that it passes eventually.
Ugh....I get this as well. Incessantly. Especially around bedtime. The insomnia has been BRUTAL over the past month and change.
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Old 04-02-2014, 01:14 PM
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I'm just checking in to share that I decided to go to this local place to register for counseling of some kind. I have been putting it off for weeks. Cravings are really hard this afternoon, and I've got to do something more for myself. Feeling lousy just leads me to think more about my ex and how crappy the situation is, my jealousy flares, and I just hate myself. I hate coming on here and complaining, I'm sorry. One hour I'm feeling so good and the next I feel so empty and sad I just want to drink it away.
Hopefully this will be the start of feeling better. I love sobriety but I need more, I know I do.
Thanks for listening.
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Old 04-02-2014, 01:21 PM
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Originally Posted by forabetterlife View Post
I'm just checking in to share that I decided to go to this local place to register for counseling of some kind. I have been putting it off for weeks. Cravings are really hard this afternoon, and I've got to do something more for myself. Feeling lousy just leads me to think more about my ex and how crappy the situation is, my jealousy flares, and I just hate myself. I hate coming on here and complaining, I'm sorry. One hour I'm feeling so good and the next I feel so empty and sad I just want to drink it away.
Hopefully this will be the start of feeling better. I love sobriety but I need more, I know I do.
Thanks for listening.
I am happy for you, FABL. I hope that this can help put you on the road to a new beginning; you deserve it.
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Old 04-02-2014, 01:43 PM
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Good for you, fabl. I tend to procrastinate when things become or seem uncomfortable. Then I'm thankful when I've done it and wonder what took me so long. We could save ourselves lots of angst! I hope it goes well.
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Old 04-02-2014, 03:03 PM
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Originally Posted by DiggingIn View Post
Honestly, I guess I'm still at the point where I say to myself "TODAY I will not drink." Maybe I'm just a little behind, or maybe that's just the only way I'm going to be able to live sober.
I go through phases, I think. After those first few days of sobriety, I haven't experienced any really serious temptations, but when my anxiety is running high, I make sure to sign in on the 24 hour club thread, as I feel accountability by putting my name on there, and I read a lot here on SR. Doing those things helps strengthen my resolve to stay sober and bolsters my confidence that I can.
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Old 04-02-2014, 03:10 PM
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FABL - I, too, am looking to start counseling. I called on Monday, they are supposed to call me back by the end of the week. Have you ever done counseling before? I never have so feel a bit of trepidation about the whole thing, but I am also glad to be doing something that feels positive, like I'm moving myself in the right direction.
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Old 04-02-2014, 03:35 PM
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FABL and Sleepydots, I'm glad you guys are seeking counseling. I hope it helps.

I know I'm starting to get crazy about the never ever again today. I think it spawned because hubby is going to be gone Friday night and I'm on my own. Typically that is the sweet time to drink. No interference. Then I say, NO! IOP is coming, you have bills, all the bad tapes. Then I start promising maybe in 5 years.

Is 5 years possible?

I don't know, but as I was leaving work I got a call - and IOP insurance is good to go. I asked when I start and he said tonight, I nearly fell over, I'm in my car at work. I said, I can't -------- he said or tomorrow. I said tomorrow is fine. I can't even make it there in time for tonight.

So, then I start my drive home and what happens? AV goes, "One more time, just this ONE LAST TIME!" I luckily have to go out of my way to buy booze, well I wouldn't have gone anyway. How crazy is that. Then I remember telling my husband just today I'm losing some weight even eating badly and the sweets. He's like well that 3/4ths bottle of vodka you aren't drinking everyday is why.

So we're off to a walk, ordering in bad foods and I start IOP tomorrow. Nervous as heck even though I've done this years ago (and quit).

So with the counseling guys, I get it. It's hard to share our demons we tried so hard to hide. I'm sure it'll be worth it. We should think of SR, family, mornings without hangovers, and if GEAH can do it, so can we.
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Old 04-02-2014, 03:41 PM
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Originally Posted by tornrealization View Post
Do you guys think just stating in your head over and over I'm not or I no longer a drinker helps you believe it eventually?
Maybe, but I think it just depends on the person. What is working for me right now is thinking about my addiction in terms of conditioning, a Pavlov's dog type of thing. For me, the stimulus was pretty much any emotion (but more often the unpleasant ones, like anxiety or anger), and my response was always alcohol. So now if I feel an urge to drink, I think something along the lines of "Oh, yes, thank you brain for that solution, I know that's what we did in the past, but not anymore", so I'm acknowledging an urge, recognizing that that feeling does not have to result in an action, and giving myself a break for feeling that way at all (as opposed to "Ugh! Why do I even think about drinking anymore!" and feeling frustrated and deprived). My wanting alcohol when I get upset is a learned response because that is what I always did, it would be weirder to not want alcohol after I have linked it so firmly to my emotions for years and years! I tell myself that over time, the more I experience those emotions, and the response is NOT drinking, that those earlier associations will weaken and hopefully one day disappear.
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Old 04-02-2014, 04:45 PM
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TR - Good for you for staying strong, proud of you! And good luck tomorrow with IOP, I know you'll do great.

Right after my last message here, the counseling place called me back, I now have an appt for next Tuesday.
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Old 04-02-2014, 04:48 PM
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Originally Posted by SleepyDots View Post
TR - Good for you for staying strong, proud of you! And good luck tomorrow with IOP, I know you'll do great.

Right after my last message here, the counseling place called me back, I now have an appt for next Tuesday.

I know you will do great too.
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