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Moms and Mums Club 2013 Part 9

Old 04-01-2014, 04:15 AM
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Hey Kimsfriend - welcome to the group . My boys are 1 and nearly 4 and I'm on day 13 / 14 after falling off the waggon whilst my hubby was away. My eldest is a mini me too and has developed all of my best traits (nagging / attention span of a nit / talking rubbish) . It's funny to watch but it can be draining too

I've struggled with booze for as long as I can remember but never really saw it until last year and I decided to sort it out. I did 3 months straight in the summer and had got up to 60 days again 13 days ago. My life and my self has improved so much since focusing on this issue and I couldn't have done it without the support of these fab ladies.

Keep at it - you can do this xxxxxx
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Old 04-01-2014, 04:17 AM
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Well done to you Newstar and everyone else hitting the big milestones! Whoop whoop!

I've tried to keep up with everyone over the weekend but it's been pretty hectic here - have spent the morning ironing and have packed our first case - only another 3 to fill

Hope everyone's good today - it's actually sunny and warm in the UK today (for a change).
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Old 04-01-2014, 06:08 AM
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Good morning to all the ladies and welcome to kimsfriend and turtle! I have received such tremendous support and comfort here with all these lovely mommies and I hope u find the same.
I am a 46yr old mother of four and a happily married stay at home mom... I am also an alcoholic binge drinker. I have just shy of 2 months today and had maintained two prior periods of sobriety... Once for 7 months and again for 4 months .... Both times convincing myself that I could moderate after abstaining for periods of time ....(the fool that I am).... Well that hasn't worked out so well for me... I REALLY liked my wine and had myself convinced I was ok because I never drank outside the home and never had a DUI.. Etc... But the truth is I was getting sh$t faced almost every weekend... Starting with beers around 4pm on Friday and drinking straight thru a lot of weekends... My bottom was drinking so much that I seriously became unconscious and would not come to and my husband and housekeeper had to call 911... My blood pressure had dropped quite low and I guess I just fell out! I woke up to find paramedics standing over me and was horrified. I can not drink normally ... I just can't .. It's that simple.. To continue to drink will probably my result in my death so I choose to live. Every day I am relearning how to live my life on life's terms SOBER and feel happier, healthier and stronger than I have in a very long time I am watching my triggers... Praying several times daily and talking to my sponsor daily and catching an AA meeting every now and again. Congrats on finding your way here and very happy to have some "new faces" in this wonderful group!!!

Hugs to all the mommies... I have read each and every post and would like to respond to each personally but unfortunately can't this morning ... So happy to hear of everyone who is doing well and continuing on our path of regrouping our lives!!!
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Old 04-01-2014, 06:15 AM
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Originally Posted by JustSarah View Post
Hey Kimsfriend - welcome to the group . My boys are 1 and nearly 4 and I'm on day 13 / 14 after falling off the waggon whilst my hubby was away. My eldest is a mini me too and has developed all of my best traits (nagging / attention span of a nit / talking rubbish) . It's funny to watch but it can be draining too I've struggled with booze for as long as I can remember but never really saw it until last year and I decided to sort it out. I did 3 months straight in the summer and had got up to 60 days again 13 days ago. My life and my self has improved so much since focusing on this issue and I couldn't have done it without the support of these fab ladies. Keep at it - you can do this xxxxxx
Thank you JustSarah
My bottom came when I had a moment of remembrance during a blackout and saw my son staring at me with his big blue eyes. I cannot do that to him anymore. I cannot do that to myself anymore. 20 years of drinking has turned me into someone I cannot be anymore.
Time to heal.
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Old 04-01-2014, 07:24 AM
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Thank you ladies for the welcomes It feels great to be a part of a group who knows exactly what I'm going through and who knows what this feels like. I feel so isolated at times like no one else "gets" me. I am going to try several different approaches this time to make sure I stay sober.

Day 3 and I'm feeling good

JustSarah - are you moving or going on vacation?
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Old 04-01-2014, 08:01 AM
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Hey Green turtle - we're off to sunnier weather in capetown . Not sure how long we'll be there but going to enjoy the adventure for sure . Whereabouts are you? I think so far I'm the only UK-er, newstar is in Oz and I think everyone else is in the states - it's so interesting! Our clocks went forward on Sunday and I thought of you all going through this a couple of weeks ago - seriously I just thought it was some backwards thing the Brits did.
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Old 04-01-2014, 08:14 AM
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I am home packing for my work trip are there ever random triggers that hit you? There is a bird in Texas that makes this particular sound that reminds me of when I was unemployed and I'd sit out on the patio and drink.... It's the same skwak that would wake me up after being passed out only to find it was still 4:00. "Great!" I'd think, "still time to clean myself up, ask husband to dinner and have some more wine..." Ugh. I hate that bird.
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Old 04-01-2014, 08:21 AM
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Welcome Kimsfriend and Greenturtle! This is a great group of moms sharing their experience, strength, and hope!
I'm a SAHM to a sweet little 7 month old boy. I'm a nurse by trade. I've basically been binge drinking since I was about 15 but I started to do it regularly about 7 years ago after I got a DUI on the last day of nursing school. When I started working as a nurse I had a lot of days off because I only worked 3 days a week and I was depressed so I just started to drink on my days off. It kept progressing and drinking time got earlier and earlier and the amount got larger and larger. I was drinking in secret. I hid it from my husband and everyone else. Near the end of my drinking career I actually got a job working 5 days a week, so I only drank on the weekends but the hangovers were getting worse. I was so shaky and riddled with anxiety that I could hardly do my job. Then I got pregnant and it didn't stop there. I'm ashamed to say that I kept drinking on the weekends sometimes. I felt so scared and in such a dark place. I was so scared for my baby but I didn't know what I know today or have the tools to quit. Finally my husband caught me at 18 wks pregnant (1 yr ago yesterday) and basically told me that either I had to stop drinking or he'd divorce me. Plus, I have a baby to take care of and I can't be getting wasted all the time anymore. I'm glad because I've wanted to quit for a really long time. So, the last time I've had a drink was on Feb. 6, but I've only drank 8 times since I've started my recovery. I know that sounds like a lot, but it's very few and far between. I've learned a lot with my slips too. Each day I'm getting stronger and stronger!
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Old 04-01-2014, 10:25 AM
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I think you're doing fab lulu
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Old 04-01-2014, 10:33 AM
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Thank you Sarah
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Old 04-01-2014, 10:56 AM
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Thank you Sara. Feb 6th is my son's birthday.
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Old 04-01-2014, 10:56 AM
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Originally Posted by KimsFriend View Post
Thank you Sara. Feb 6th is my son's birthday.
Sorry- I meant Lulu- my head is still cloudy.
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Old 04-01-2014, 01:47 PM
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It's my birthday too!
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Old 04-01-2014, 01:48 PM
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Hey ladies, so it's 9.30ish here and I forced myself to go to 'arms v's legs' tonight with my mate - feel better for it now but could have just called it off and gone to bed early. Have had a really chilled day at home with the kiddos, ironing, watching them play with bubbles in the garden, pottering and I was exhausted by 5. Why is it that the less you do the more tired you become?! need to get back on the exercise wagon as just haven't really been able to face it yesterday and today was a real chore - hopefully tomorrow will be better

Anyways I checked my diary and today is day 17 - I keep getting my days confused - either way not too bad, nearly at that 3 week mark and making good progress to leave this 'problem' behind. Not much a doing right now - off to read a few chapters of my book before cooking out for the night

Good luck with your trip Babs - I hope you knock em dead . How are you getting on now BeBetter?

Night night gals xxxxxxxx
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Old 04-01-2014, 03:40 PM
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Hi Moms,

Welcome, KimsFriend! My daughter's bd is Feb 9th (just turned 4).

Greenturtle, way to go on 3 days!

Babs, yes, I have random triggers that seem to come out of nowhere. The sound of chirping birds in the spring is one of them. Or the sound of crickets on a summer night remind of nights of drinking on our back patio, etc. There always seems to be so trigger somewhere. I guess we have to learn how to get through these triggers and then maybe one day they won't be triggers anymore??

Had a good day today. Was sunny and much warmer (high 50's) so my daughter and I enjoyed it. Feeling exhausted tonight. Having to force myself to even make dinner. My daughter had swim class and a play date so she is tired and cranky now too. Hoping for an early bedtime.

Hope everyone is doing well Good luck with the packing, Sarah. I always hated packing, but it feels good when it is all done.
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Old 04-01-2014, 04:16 PM
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Welcome Kimsfriend!!!!
I hope you enjoy this group of women! I'm on day 53. And it's so worth it to be sober with your kids! I'm so much happier! I can't wait to learn more about you:-)
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Old 04-01-2014, 04:44 PM
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Welcome Kimsfriend!!! I think you will like it here...we are all very supportive of each other, and thus has been my lifeline for the past 11 months! Heck...after hanging out so much, many if us are now on the same menstrual cycle;-)

I'm mom to a 7 year old daughter who I know is much happier with this sober mom:-)

Sarah...congrats, and do excited for your big move!

Busy day at work, am looking forward to some down time now.
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Old 04-02-2014, 07:16 AM
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Hi ladies - Day 4 and feeling good about it I just wish it was Day 104 lol...
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Old 04-02-2014, 07:17 AM
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Yes... The whole period thing??!!!... I'm going thru menopause and have not had a period in 6 months and got one today
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Old 04-02-2014, 07:33 AM
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Hi ladies,
GT congratulations on day 4!
Babs have fun on your trip! I know what you mean about random triggers. Unfortunatly I've found that one of my triggers is my car. Lots of driving to and from places to get wine in that thing lol.
I'm feeling good today. I had a great day yesterday. Urges are finally starting to subside. Baby is finally feeling better and in a better mood. I did a big workout yesterday and I also went to the mall and bought some things to reward myself for the weight I've lost and for staying sober through those stinkin' urges last week. It felt good as I haven't bought anything for myself in a long time. I haven't been shopping for clothes since I was 6 months pregnant and I'm still wearing some of my maternity shirts.
I wanted to share one thing that helped me through those urges last week when they got really bad. I read in my SMART recovery that if you give in when your urges are really bad like that you're telling yourself that if things get rough you can always give in to alcohol even if it's just occasionally. Therefore, you're still dependent on alcohol. They call it the "PIG" or "Problem of Instant Gratification". It can also make the urges stronger and more frequent. So if you can get through those tough times you're really doing yourself a huge favor in sobriety. Here is a link if you're interested: Navigating The Road To Recovery | SMART RecoveryŽ
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